requestingwisdom

Mirror, Mirror

Tue, 23 Sep 2025 13:37:40 GMT

Mirror, Mirror

MIRROR, MIRROR

Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the one I see?

A mask I wear, a borrowed face, a shadow not of me.

I smile, I nod, I play the part, while truth hides in the hall,

The cracks, the fears, the quiet lies—I've built my secret wall.

Mirror, mirror, do you lie, or do I fool my eyes?

I chase a ghost, a perfect self, with my repeated lies.

But in my depths, I glimpse the whole, the messy, fractured me,

And for the first time, I am mine as is —unbound, unclaimed, and free.

Marc

RESTORING INTEGRITY – WITH WHO I REALLY AM

To become a contemporary Elder, I've discovered that sustaining Elderhood requires one fundamental practice: consciously, ruthlessly, and compassionately focusing on my integrity.

But I don't mean integrity in the watered-down sense of "I don't lie." That's the smallest corner of it.

For me, integrity means being whole, complete, nothing left out, unbroken, with who I truly am. The unabridged edition of me.

The Hidden Cost of Self-Deception

I know nothing undermines my integrity more than self-deception. I've had a lot of practice. How could I not?

Self-deception is a norm in our culture. Can't look bad to others? Can't be found out? Can't be exposed? They don't need to know. Worse, what if they found out?

Yet I discovered something profound: those areas where I deceive myself become the exact limits of who I am—actually, who I could be. My self-deception was like using an electric collar to keep my dog in the yard. It's called a containment system. Self-deception was my containment system.

How I Began Catching Myself

This practice of catching myself when I found myself self-deceiving was not difficult. All I had to do was focus my attention on those dark corners of my life—the ones I ignored or found myself justifying, rationalizing, or the ones I kept making excuses for.

I noticed the lies. Self-deception would let me lie to myself even though I knew it wasn't true. It was when I knew what was coming out of my mouth was not true, but I said it anyway.

All my examples would be messy, human, ordinary—just like your self-deceptions. And believe me, you've got at least a few. Relationships. Work. Health. Unspoken needs. Self. Children. Neighbors. Politics.

The goal isn't perfection. It's ownership of all that I am, and having that be whole, complete, nothing left out, unbroken. That would be the integrity with 'who I truly am,' unrestricted, without discomfort, without pretense. For me, that is boundless freedom.

MY LESSONS LEARNED ABOUT SELF-DECEPTION

Through years of this practice, I've identified the patterns. Here's what I discovered about how self-deception operates:

Self-deception was when I dodged those parts of me that I pretended didn't exist.

Self-deception resided in those areas that I was afraid to have exposed.

Self-deception was easy to find. All I had to do was note what I'd been telling myself about those parts that were unacceptable.

Self-deception harmed my relationships, as I became protective of areas where I was hiding, fearing judgment, rejection, or conflict.

Self-deception were those internal voices that belittled, criticized, and castigated me, her, him, them, or it.

Self-deception makes you right.

Self-deception was like trying to hide a goat in my closet. I could shut the door, push it back, maybe even cover it with a blanket—but it's still there. It

still bumped into everything, still left footprints, and still smelled.

The Deeper Mechanics

Self-deception operated quietly, like a shadow in my mind, shaping my choices. It convinced me that avoidance is safety, that denial is protection, that pretending makes life easier.

Self-deception colored my perceptions, distorted my judgments, and subtly manipulated my behavior.

Self-deception limited my authentic self-expression.

Self-deception in my relationships fostered resentment, misunderstanding, and distance.

Self-deception kept me small, reactive, and trapped in patterns I pretended weren't there. By the way, my favorite patterns were passive-

aggressive and victim.

Self-deception eroded integrity, wisdom, and presence —the very qualities necessary to step fully into Elderhood.

The Hidden Benefits

So, if these were the costs of self-deception, why did I keep doing it? Because there were benefits:

The benefits of self-deception were that I didn't have to own who I was, be responsible for the whole me, and most importantly, I got to be right about me, them, and it.

But here's what I learned: Elders have nothing to hide from themselves or anyone else. And that, for me, is unmitigated freedom.

REFERENCES & INTERPRETATIONS

· "Most men do not really want freedom, because freedom involves responsibility, and most men are frightened of responsibility." – Sigmund Freud
Insight: Denial of responsibility is a form of self-deception.

· "The first principle is that you must not fool yourself—and you are the easiest person to fool." – Richard Feynman
Insight: Self-deception is universal and requires constant vigilance.

· "We are never so defenseless against suffering as when we love, never so helplessly unhappy as when we have lost our illusions of self." – Sigmund Freud
Insight: Clinging to illusions is a classic self-deception.

· "Most people do not really want to know themselves." – Carl Jung
Insight: Avoidance of inner truth is a subtle but pervasive self-deception.

· "All men have their faults, but the greatest fault is the inability to see them in oneself." – Baltasar Gracian
Insight: Self-deception blinds us to our own flaws.

· "The greatest deception men suffer is from their own opinions." – Leonardo da Vinci
Insight: Our beliefs can mask reality more than any external influence.

· "We deceive ourselves when we pretend that our actions are caused by something other than our own choices." – Epictetus
Insight: Self-deception is avoiding ownership of choice.

· "To know oneself is the beginning of all wisdom." – Ralph Waldo Emerson
Insight: Self-deception doesn't let you know yourself.

SUMMARY REPORT

What I now understand is this: When I can accept with grace, humor, and appreciation who I am—the whole, complete, uncut me—I no longer require self-deception.

Now I can recognize when I fall into its trap.

AN ELDER'S SOLUTION TO POLITICAL VIOLENCE

Wed, 17 Sep 2025 12:00:16 GMT

AN ELDER'S SOLUTION TO POLITICAL VIOLENCE

No problem can be solved without responsibility—that's an irrefutable law, a principle that holds true regardless of circumstances or beliefs.

Yet most of us resist taking responsibility because it requires us to become cause in the matter, not just observers of it.

Cause doesn't just mean "reason," it means the origin of the action and its consequences.

Blame and fault are the opposite of responsibility. Blame and fault make others responsible, make others wrong, and make you right.

When you insist you are right, that's righteous indignation.

Righteous indignation creates judgment, separation, and puts you in attack mode. Thoughts tighten; empathy shrinks; position hardens.

Political violence is clearly on the rise, increasing in frequency and intensity. Worse, we are beginning to normalize it. Normalization gets you "off the hook," so you don't have to be responsible.

Here's what most people miss: political violence thrives in the extremes, fed by righteous indignation and blame. Elders know something that younger generations are still learning—true power lives in the middle ground.

If the answer is to expand responsibility, Elders know how to expand it in themselves and others. And that is to take themselves and them to "middle ground."

What Middle Ground Looks Like in Practice

Operating on the middle ground means seeing both sides clearly and understanding their thinking and actions. It's not about taking sides or retreating; it's about holding yourself as a cause in the matter of how this conversation turns out. That requires responsibility in motion: no lashing out, no righteous indignation, no blaming others.

What does operating from the middle look like in practice? It means listening to both sides of a heated political debate without needing to choose a team. It means seeing the fear beneath someone's anger without dismissing their concerns. It means staying present when every instinct tells you to either fight or flee.

In this middle, you stay present, measured, aware. You act from clarity, not reaction. And from that place, you can guide others toward the middle too—calming extremes, opening dialogue, and reducing the fuel for political violence.

You can't see your role, your responsibility when you exist on the edges. You need to be willing to see both sides, which then puts you in the middle.

Elders can lead this conversation to bring people to the middle.

By owning their role as Elders, they can stabilize the storm, reduce polarization, and create conditions where political violence loses its grip.

ELDERS KNOW HOW TO LIVE AND TEACH "LIVING IN THE MIDDLE"

Elders have learned that life isn't about extremes, either burning out chasing an ideal or punishing themselves in denial. They know and experience that true power comes from the middle: the place where awareness, choice, and presence exist.

Elders know how to locate themselves in the middle. They don't need to dominate, manipulate, or withdraw. They act with clarity, guided by wisdom, not impulses.

In Buddhism, Christianity, Judaism, and Islam, the Middle Way is a way of wisdom. Jesus understood what Buddhists call the Middle Way—you must engage with the world's chaos without becoming consumed by it.

You can influence change without losing yourself in the storm. It's knowing when to step forward, when to hold back, and when to create the settings for what truly matters.

Political violence is a product of extremes, the furthest distances from the middle. The Elder's job is to move people to the middle.

Elders understand this ancient wisdom: you must be of the world to create change, but not consumed by the world's chaos. You can only move people to the middle when you're not lost in it yourself, but you must engage with it to make change happen.

The Daily Practice of Returning to Middle Ground

Elders are aware that getting themselves back to the middle ground is always the first step. They need to get themselves there first, then they can do it for others. And in our time and place, getting knocked off the middle is a frequent, often loud and intrusive voice.

So, part of being an Elder is the daily practice of getting yourself back to the middle—the middle of up and down, good and bad, right and wrong, success and failure, expectation or reality, bigheartedness or selfishness, helpful or harmful, valueless or valuable, and on and on.

The middle… is where clarity lives, where judgments soften, where action is guided by cause, not reaction. It's the place where an Elder stands—steady, aware, unshaken, holding both sides without being pulled, seeing what is, and shaping what can be. To return to the middle is to return to power.

Elders know where the middle is and how to get there. The need is obvious. We need Elders in the field.

“Actually, being with elders, speaking about what it meant to be an elder, what life looked like as an elder, and hearing them speak about how they navigate life as an elder, let me see how I want to grow old. Thank you, incredible event. When’s the next one?” -J.B.K.

ELDERS, AI, and THE UNLIKELY CONSEQUENCES TO THE GENDER GAP

Wed, 30 Jul 2025 12:25:22 GMT

A Heads Up to Corporate America, State and Federal Government, and Everybody Else

We are witnessing the most significant workplace transformation in decades. But here's what everyone is missing: AI isn't just disrupting jobs—it's about to flip the entire age hierarchy in corporate America on its head.

While younger generations have held the technological advantage for the past three decades, AI is about to level that playing field completely. And when it does, something unexpected will emerge: the irreplaceable value of Elder wisdom.

THE COMING COMMODIFICATION OF KNOWLEDGE

AI's most profound impact won't be replacing workers—it will be democratizing knowledge itself. Every piece of data, every research report, every case study, every industry insight will become instantly accessible to anyone at any level of an organization.

When a 25-year-old analyst can access the same information as a 55-year-old executive in seconds, the traditional knowledge-based hierarchy crumbles. Youth's technological edge—their primary source of workplace leverage—vanishes overnight.

This is what I call the "commodification" of knowledge: when information becomes so universally accessible that possessing it no longer provides a competitive advantage. Knowledge transforms from a scarce resource into a basic utility, like electricity or running water.

But here's the twist nobody sees coming: when knowledge becomes a commodity, wisdom becomes currency.

WHY AI CAN'T REPLACE ELDER WISDOM

I've been swimming in AI waters since 2017, when I invited Charles Jennings, author of Artificial Intelligence: Rise of the Lightspeed Learners, to speak at my industry conference. Back then, the room paid more attention to their phones than to his predictions about the future of AI. Today, every one of his forecasts has arrived.

Through seven years of continuous learning as an AI user, working with Elder groups, and coaching clients on AI integration, I've discovered AI's most significant limitation: it cannot experience.

AI can process. It can predict. It can analyze patterns across millions of data points. But it cannot have a broken heart, lose a parent, navigate a failed merger, or comfort a grieving colleague. It cannot feel the weight of responsibility when a decision affects hundreds of jobs.

Experience is the essential ingredient that transforms knowledge into wisdom.

Wisdom discerns where knowledge merely catalogs. Wisdom makes the right choice at the right time—not only based on data, but on intuition honed through decades of human experience. Wisdom brings together disparate elements—feelings, history, relationships, and insight—to make knowledge work better for people.

A 29-year-old, no matter how brilliant, rarely possesses wisdom because wisdom requires fermentation. It occurs over time, through trials and failures, through seasons of loss and recovery.

THE HIERARCHY FLIP

For those in the 55-70+ age group who can convert their accumulated knowledge into accessible wisdom, AI will enhance rather than diminish their workplace value. Marginalization will decrease. Inclusion will increase.

Think about it: King Arthur had Merlin. Bilbo had Gandalf. Plato had Socrates. Luke Skywalker had Yoda. Every transformative journey requires both cutting-edge tools and timeless wisdom.

When everyone has access to the same information, companies will desperately need people who can:

· Discern signal from noise

· Navigate complex human dynamics

· Make decisions under uncertainty

· Provide historical context that prevents repeated mistakes

· Offer the emotional intelligence that no algorithm can replicate

These capabilities don't diminish with age—they strengthen.

THE UNEXPECTED GENDER ADVANTAGE

Here's where the implications of the gender gap become fascinating. Women who have navigated decades of workplace challenges while developing emotional intelligence, relationship-building skills, and collaborative leadership styles will find themselves uniquely positioned in this wisdom-based economy.

For both men and women, the very qualities that were sometimes undervalued in knowledge hierarchies—empathy, relationship navigation, long-term thinking, collaborative problem-solving—become the most sought-after capabilities when wisdom becomes the differentiator.

THE TRANSFORMATION IS HERE

We stand at the threshold of a radical shift in how we view aging and workforce value. Senior executives, managers, and frontline workers who can become vessels of wisdom will see their recognition and influence rise substantially.

This isn't just about workplace dynamics—it's about the quality of your final decades. When you become known as someone who brings wisdom rather than just experience, your late-age years transform from decline into culmination.

Wisdom enhances everything : management decisions, customer relationships, team dynamics, strategic thinking, and organizational culture. It reduces friction while increasing horsepower.

THE ELDER ADVANTAGE

For those of us guiding the journey from "Older to Elder," from "Age to Sage," AI presents an unexpected gift. The same technology that threatens to automate away so many roles will simultaneously boost those who have traveled the full path from knowledge through experience to wisdom.

The future belongs not to the smartest people in the room, but to the wisest.

And wisdom, unlike knowledge, cannot be commodified. It must be earned through the irreplaceable currency of lived experience.

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PAST-PRESENT-FUTURE HOW THEY EXIST FOR AN ELDER AND WHY IT MAKES A DIFFERENCE

Tue, 22 Jul 2025 12:38:43 GMT

PAST-PRESENT-FUTURE

HOW THEY EXIST FOR AN ELDER AND WHY IT MAKES A DIFFERENCE

So, what makes an Elder an Elder instead of just an older person?

It's their wisdom.

But Elder wisdom isn't about knowing facts or stats. It's not about having a ton of life experience just for the sake of it, as in "My last trip to Barcelona was divine. The food was outstanding."

Elder wisdom is more like a slow-cooked bouillabaisse that has been simmering for years, bringing together layers of intuition, reflection, and clarity. And this wisdom fundamentally changes how Elders experience the most basic element of existence: time itself.

The Difference in How Wisdom Works

You see, conventional wisdom is like that friend who always insists on checking the weather app before leaving the house, even though you both know they never follow the forecast anyway. You know the type: they're glued to their phone, still squinting at a blurry screen as if it's going to change everything. That's conventional wisdom: trying to predict the storm with information that doesn't capture the whole story.

But Elder wisdom? That's like my experienced Native American friend, Robert Mirabal, who knows how to look up at the sky and feel the wind on his skin. He doesn't need to check the weather app—he can already tell it's going to rain. He's lived through enough storms to sense when one is coming. He doesn't rely solely on the data; he understands the rhythm of nature itself.

This same intuitive understanding is precisely what transforms how Elders experience the flow of time.

How Elders Experience Time

Elder wisdom is like sitting in a quiet room, where time itself seems to bend and stretch. Imagine you're watching a film reel. For most people, it's as if they're watching a movie scene by scene, one moment at a time—trapped in the sequential progression of events.

But for an Elder, it's like they've stepped out of the film and can watch the entire reel, from beginning to end, simultaneously. The past, present, and future all unfold in front of them, with no linear constraints. They understand that time isn't a straight line—it's a web of interconnected moments, where everything influences everything else.

This expanded time perspective creates something remarkable: it liberates them from the ego's desperate need to control each moment.

Freedom from the Ego's Prison

When you can see the whole pattern of time, the ego's urgent demands suddenly seem... small. That annoying little voice that tells you to "prove yourself" or "make sure everyone knows how smart you are" loses its power when you understand you're part of something much larger.

Elder wisdom has learned to see past all that surface-level noise and get to the very heart of the matter. Elder wisdom gets down to the "doer" not the "deed."

Elders have already had many existential crises, found the needed answers, and moved on to more important things in life. This isn't about being out of touch—quite the opposite. They're incredibly in touch with the world, with others, and most importantly, with themselves.

And this liberation from ego, combined with their expanded view of time, manifests as something unmistakable: authentic presence.

The Power of Presence

When an Elder enters the room, it's like the whole atmosphere shifts. You can feel it. They don't need to say much. They don't need to grab attention. They just are. Their energy speaks louder than words ever could. Most are still trying to get our act together. But Elders?

They have no act.

This authentic presence—free from ego's demands and grounded in an understanding of time's true nature—gives them a unique power in the world.

The Power to Prevent and Protect

Ultimately, this wisdom empowers them to prevent future harm, not just to themselves, but to everyone around them. Because they can see the patterns across time, and because their ego isn't demanding immediate gratification, they know where things are headed.

They can stop the train wreck before it happens.

Elders are the ones who can look into the future, raise an eyebrow, and say, "I've seen this before. Here's what's going to happen and here's how it can be fixed."

So, while conventional wisdom is busy checking the weather app, Elder wisdom is already out the door, umbrella in hand, heading for higher ground.

The Challenge We Face

Now, the trick is, how do we get a culture that's so busy checking its screen to start listening to this kind of wisdom? That's the real challenge. But hey, if anyone can do it, it's the Elders. We're working on it. Even though it is much more challenging in today's modern, youth-obsessed, more-is-better, speed-counts, technology-is-king world, we're making progress. Elders have patience, intention, and wisdom—the right keys to unlock the listening for Elder wisdom.

THE LESSON

Elder wisdom reshapes time itself. For the Elder, the past isn't just memory—it's meaning. The present isn't a distraction—it's presence.

And the future isn't mysterious, it's momentum. They don't just live in time; they work with time.

This is what makes the difference.

Older people have lived through the decades. Elders carry them. They carry the scars, the lessons, the humility, and the grace. And they do something rare: they offer it back, not as opinion, but as teachings.

In a culture that worships the now, Elders bring the who. In a world hypnotized by speed, they offer depth. While others run toward the next new thing, Elders are the ones who ask the question no one else thinks to ask—and wait for the real answer.

That's why it makes a difference. Because when time is seen through the eyes of an Elder, life is no longer a sequence of events—it becomes a symphony of meaning. And when Elders take their rightful place in culture, the future finally has a chance to grow up.

ELDERLY or ELDER

Mon, 14 Jul 2025 17:31:56 GMT

ELDERLY or ELDER

IT’S THE CONTEXT

It really is more than an either/or choice. "Elderly" and "Elder" are two entirely different contexts. And here's the kicker—context is always decisive.

Context is everything. It's the backdrop that turns a mundane act into something meaningful or, sometimes, forgettable. Just like a seed planted in different soil: some grow strong in rich, fertile earth, while others dry up in a barren patch of dirt. The same word, idea, or action takes on completely different meanings depending on the context in which it's placed.

Context determines what things mean, how they're known, how they're understood, and how they shape our emotional response. A compliment about someone's appearance might feel uplifting at a casual social gathering, but dropping it in a professional meeting comes off as awkward, if not inappropriate.

So yeah, context is decisive.

And when it comes to aging, the context between "elderly" and "elder" has a profound impact on the quality of life as one grows old.

Can’t say it enough: context is decisive.

Check Yourself Out—Notice

Take a moment.

Write down or type the word “elderly.” Then observe your thoughts and physical sensations.

Notice what happens in your mind and your body when you see the word "elderly." You might feel a sense of sadness, discomfort, or even resignation.

Now, notice your physical response when you hear the word "elder." Does your posture shift? Do you feel more energized? More respect?

You'll notice pretty quickly that "elderly" and "elder" might sound similar, but they exist in vastly different contexts. And that context determines what thoughts, perceptions, and feelings thrive—and what gets pushed aside.

The Leadership Context Reveals Everything

Let's use leadership as an example to see how dramatically context shifts meaning.

Imagine the term "elderly" in a leadership context. What comes to mind? A liability, right? An elderly leader in the corporate world might be seen as past their prime, out of touch, or a hindrance to innovation. Believe me, I've lived this one—marginalized, isolated, avoided, disrespected, overlooked. You’re a whisper in a room of loud music.

Now, apply "elder" in the same leadership context. Everything changes. An "elder" is someone who brings wisdom, experience, and stability to the table.

They offer a long-term perspective, mentorship, and a level of insight that younger leaders haven't yet earned.

In this context, an elder's success isn't measured by how well they can use the latest tech gadgets; it's about offering timeless wisdom and sage strategic guidance.

Context determines the future. Whether aging is framed as decline (elderly) or wisdom (elder), it shapes how you engage with growing old.

Two Futures: Default vs. Conscious Choice

Here's where the distinction becomes life-altering.

When you think of "elderly," their future is pretty much pre-written. It's a narrative you've encountered a hundred times: slow decline, frailty, dependency, and the idea that life is winding down. The elderly wait for things to happen to them.

But when we talk about an Elder, we're talking about someone who actively creates their future. Elders don't sit back and let aging happen to them. They create their future, crafting it with purpose and intention. They don't just get old; they grow—mentally, spiritually, emotionally.

Think of it this way: The elderly are like a leaf in the river, drifting wherever the current takes them. But the Elder? They're the rower on the boat, navigating through turbulent waters. They chart their course, choose their direction, and determine their pace.

Cultural Narrative vs. Personal Authority

Here's the thing: The "elderly" are trapped by the cultural narrative. Society's expectations, unexamined gossip, and the relentless ticking of the clock define them. They're boxed into a corner where their value is continually reduced, and they're written off as figures of pity. Society expects them to step aside, to become invisible, to make room for the younger generation.

But the Elder? They rewrite that script. They reject the box society puts them in. They create their own story. They use their age not as a weight, but as fuel to drive purpose, wisdom, and impact. Elders are outside the box—hell, they don't even see a box.

The Self-Worth Equation

This is perhaps the most crucial difference.

The elderly, under society's dismissive narrative, often watch their self-worth drain away. Reduced to stereotypes of frailty and irrelevance, their sense of value erodes—not because it's deserved, but because society chooses to overlook their wisdom and contributions.

The elderly become invisible, marginalized, as their value shrinks with each passing year. The culture makes them feel like they don't belong.

Now, contrast that with the Elder. An Elder's self-worth isn't just intact; it actually flourishes. They have lived through challenges, lessons, and experiences that make them a resource of authentic wisdom. They carry years of learning, contributing, and giving with grace. They know their value in a way that society overlooks.

Death as Enemy vs. Death as Companion

Okay, this one sounds dramatic, but bear with me.

The elderly, trapped in the cultural context, fear death. Old age becomes filled with helplessness, illness, and a looming dread of the end. It's like trying to run from a shadow that just keeps getting bigger.

Elders, however, have a completely different relationship with death. It's not something to be feared; it's something to be understood and even embraced.

Death becomes a companion, not an enemy. Elders walk alongside it, living each day to the fullest with a deep sense of purpose, knowing their time is precious and fleeting.

Elders know nothing lasts, including them.

The Choice is Yours

In the end, the choice is yours. Are you going to live into the context of the elderly, or are you going to live in the context of the Elder?

One is a passive journey dictated by society's script. The other is a conscious, empowered path, where wisdom, purpose, and self-worth serve as the actors in your screenplay.

The narrative isn't fixed; it's yours to create.

Choose wisely. Elderly or Elder is a choice. Which one will you make?

Reimagine Aging: Elderly or Elder

September 11, 2025, at 11:00 a.m. PST, 2:00 p.m. EST, and 7:00 p.m. GMT.

A dynamic panel discussion featuring five leading voices in the transformation of aging into elderhood, followed by an interactive Q&A session.

1. Discover how aging can be transformed into a powerful journey of wisdom, influence, purpose, and peace of mind.

2. Shift your narrative around growing old, becoming obsolete, and undesirable, to being contemporary, vital, influential, and causative in a new yet ancient way.

3. Examine the barriers an Elder faces, being unheard, discounted, and marginalized, and what they are doing to be heard. “Wisdom unshared is wisdom lost.”

ELDER AS A PRACTICE

Mon, 07 Jul 2025 19:03:15 GMT

ELDER AS A PRACTICE

[6-minute read]

ELDER AS A PRACTICE

An Instruction Manual

You've spent decades mastering your profession. But have you considered that becoming an Elder requires the same deliberate practice—and offers rewards far greater than any career achievement?

What Is Practice?

The term practice generally refers to the repeated exercise or performance of an activity or skill to acquire proficiency or mastery.

Malcolm Gladwell's 10,000-Hour Rule, introduced in his book Outliers, proposes that becoming truly proficient—or achieving mastery—in any field requires roughly 10,000 hours of deliberate practice.

Gladwell contends that talent alone isn't enough to explain success; it's the extensive time spent honing a skill, learning from mistakes, and pushing boundaries that leads to actual expertise.

The Gladwell rule emphasizes the importance of consistent, focused effort over time. While it doesn't guarantee automatic success, it underscores the idea that mastery comes through relentless dedication and practice, whether in music, sports, or any other discipline.

But here's what Gladwell didn't tell you: The most profound mastery you can achieve in your lifetime isn't professional—it's personal. In our work, to become and sustain ourselves as Elders, we practice being an Elder.

Why Elders Practice - The Benefits of Being an Elder

What would change in your life if you approached elderhood with the same intentionality you once brought to your career?

The intent of any practice is to cultivate mastery, deepen understanding, and foster growth. It is through consistent engagement that you hone your skills, strengthen resilience, and align with your purpose.

Whether it's spiritual discipline, craft, or personal development, practice is the vehicle that transforms intention into thoughtful, committed action, knowledge into wisdom, and effort into lasting change.

Wisdom

As you develop as an Elder, you'll discover that the accumulation of your life experiences, combined with rigorous self-reflection, enables you to gain profound insight into human nature, behavioral patterns, and the broader world.

This self-understanding provides you with access to a body of knowledge about yourself and others, enabling you to form deep connections to who you really are—and that opens deeper connections with others.

"The clearer we see ourselves, the clearer we see others." —Steve Maraboli

Purpose and Fulfillment

Can you imagine discovering that your greatest purpose was waiting for you in the last third of your life? Elders uncover their Higher Purpose—an "inside job" that shifts focus from personal achievement and public recognition to contributing to the well-being and growth of others.

When you find this purpose, your ego ungrasps, and something far more powerful takes hold.

"The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why." —Mark Twain

Emotional Resilience

You've faced life's challenges—but have you learned to transform them into wisdom? As you develop as an Elder, you'll discover an emotional resilience that becomes your greatest asset in navigating today's chaotic world.

You learn how to move through adversity with grace, acceptance, and calm, fostering a peace of mind that others can feel in your presence.

"Resilience is knowing that you are the only one that has the power and the responsibility to pick yourself up." —Mary Holloway

Clarity and Perspective

When did you last step back far enough to see the whole picture? As an Elder, you possess the ability to see situations from a much broader perspective. You can recognize both the short-term and long-term consequences of actions. This clarity helps you guide yourself and others through turbulent times with equanimity and a steady hand.

"When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change." —Wayne Dyer

Legacy

What do you want to leave behind that will outlast your physical presence? Becoming an Elder provides you the opportunity to create a meaningful legacy. You're not just thinking about the present, but actively shaping how your actions, wisdom, and values will influence future generations.

"The greatest use of life is to spend it for something that will outlast it." —William James

Empathy and Compassion

Can you recall a moment when someone's wisdom stopped you in your tracks? What made their presence so powerful? Living a life with awareness of both hardship and triumph fosters the kind of empathy that creates sanctuary for others.

You understand and connect with others profoundly because you understand that life comes with suffering. You feel it because you have felt it, and you remember what it felt like.

"Empathy is about finding echoes of another person in yourself." —Mohsin Hamid

Freedom from Ego

Where in your life are you still protecting an ego that no longer serves you? As an Elder, you consciously move beyond ego-driven motivations and actions. You become less concerned with personal accolades and more focused on what serves the greater good, which empowers you to live with a sense of peace and detachment from life's troubles.

"True freedom is the absence of the ego's grip." —Eckhart Tolle "The ego is a veil between humans and God." —Rumi

Mentorship and Influence

You have decades of hard-won wisdom—but are you sharing it? As an Elder, you can shape the next generation by passing on your knowledge, values, and life lessons. This role as mentor not only benefits those you guide but also enhances your sense of worth and connection to the world.

"A mentor is someone who sees more talent and ability within you than you see in yourself and helps bring it out of you." —Bob Proctor

Connection to the Larger Whole

Through spiritual awareness, cultural understanding, and a sense of unity with humanity, you develop a more profound sense of connection to the broader cosmic perspective. This deeper connection fosters a profound sense of belonging—something our isolated culture desperately needs.

"We are like islands in the sea, separate on the surface but connected in the deep." —William James

The Practice of Elder

Pause here. Think of the wisest person you know. What is it about their presence that commands respect? Notice how they listen, how they speak, how they carry themselves. This is what we're cultivating through these practices:

Self-Reflection

When did you last honestly examine not just what you think, but why you think it? Regularly examining your thoughts, actions, and experiences is what allows you to cultivate wisdom. It's about being honest with yourself, eliminating self-deception, understanding your past, and using that insight to guide your future choices.

Embracing Vulnerability

Are you still hiding behind the professional armor that once protected you? Being vulnerable allows you to connect with others on a deeper level, providing a safe space for others to do the same.

The kind of vulnerability Elders possess is not softness or weakness—it's a courageous act of independence in which you're afraid to be yourself but still

do it anyway. You don't hold back who you are.

Living with Purpose

You lived intentionally in your career—but are you living intentionally now? Elders are keenly aware of their values and align their actions with them.

Along with self-reflection, this opens the door to your higher purpose, which gives direction and meaning to life, especially in these later years.

Service to Others

How might your life change if you made it more about others than yourself? Elders contribute, offering their time, wisdom, and resources to help others grow. The act of serving others cultivates humility and ensures that your legacy lives on. When you make it more about others rather than yourself, you discover you are happier and more empowered.

Mindfulness and Presence

When was the last time you were completely present in a conversation—not planning your response, not distracted by your phone, but fully there?

Being present in the moment—whether alone, in conversation, or in action—helps you maintain clarity and calm.

This mindfulness allows you to be fully engaged in life, rather than being distracted or overwhelmed by it. Find your own best path to mindfulness, whether through meditation, spending time in nature, journaling, or simply pausing to take a deep breath in moments of stress.

Continual Learning

What have you learned that surprised you this month? Elders never stop learning. Whether through reading, listening to podcasts, watching online videos, engaging in new experiences, or seeking out different perspectives, you remain curious and open-minded.

Self-Care

Can you sustain wisdom without sustaining the vessel that carries it? To maintain elderhood, you must understand it's essential to care for both body and mind. Regular exercise, balanced nutrition, mental challenges, and emotional care such as meditation, therapy, and self-reflection become your daily practices.

Forgiveness and Letting Go

What grudges are you still carrying that serve no one—including yourself? A key aspect of sustaining elderhood is learning to release grudges, regrets, and negative emotions. This process of forgiveness frees up emotional energy, allowing for greater peace and clarity.

You understand that genuine forgiveness is a transformative act. To truly forgive, you need to change who you have been.

Gratitude and Acceptance

Can you find gratitude even for the experiences that wounded you? You cultivate gratitude for life's experiences, both positive and negative. Acceptance of the inevitability of aging and death brings you a calm acceptance of life's cycles, helping you embrace your role in the greater flow of existence.

These practices aren't just concepts to consider—they're a path to walk. They allow you to not only transition into elderhood but also to maintain and deepen your wisdom, presence, and impact over time.

Which of these Elder practices calls to you most strongly right now? Where will you begin your 10,000 hours of conscious elderhood?

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MARK YOUR CALENDAR – TIME TO REIMAGINE

Elder, Not Elderly: Redefining Aging for Our Time

Thu, 26 Jun 2025 22:16:17 GMT

Elder, Not Elderly: Redefining Aging for Our Time

Ancient Wisdom, Modern Relevance: The Contemporary Elder Defined

[A 6-minute read]

Dear Dr. Cooper,

Thank you for accepting our invitation. And thank you for sending us your bio sketch, the links to your websites, and the links to your media interviews.

We ask guests to answer a single question in one thousand words or fewer. We feature their response as a key part of our monthly newsletter, which we send out via MailChimp.

A few of our members have previously read your book, so your name has come up in a few of our online meetings.

We informed our members via email and let them know that you were invited to be a guest post for April’s newsletter. We ask them to visit your website, in your case, your two websites. We also ask them to watch a few of your podcasts or listen to your radio interviews.

Then, on a specific date, we ask them to send us the questions they would like you to answer. We collect their responses and then select the question most frequently asked.

Please answer in approximately 1,000 words.

The question is, “What is a Contemporary Elder?”

Again, thank you for accepting our invitation. I look forward to your response.

Warmly,

Lisa

_________________________________________________________

ELDER NOT ELDERLY

Let's begin with the word Elder first, then work backwards.

Understanding is a function of contrast. You can best comprehend something by comparing it to something else. Without contrast, things remain unclear.

You recognize success because you've experienced failure. On a deeper level, you understand what it means to belong because you've felt the sting of isolation. You grasp the value of love only after your heart's been broken.

It's in these contrasts—raw, lived, existential—that life reveals its deeper meanings. Contrast isn't just a learning tool; it's the lens through which we make sense of our own humanity and the world.

An Exercise in Discovery

Here's what I want you to do. Be a witness to your immediate thoughts. Write them down. Don't edit. Don't try to get them "right." Simply write what comes into your head.

What do you think and feel when you hear the word "Elderly?"

What characteristics, qualities, and emotions do you immediately think of and feel with that word?

Take a moment. Actually do this.

For most people I've asked, responses center on fragility, decline, obsolescence, isolation, dependence, and loss of purpose. The word conjures vulnerability and a life diminished, where age becomes burden rather than blessing.

Now, with the same witnessing approach:

What do you think and feel when you hear the word "Elder?"

What characteristics and qualities do you automatically assign to this word?

Again, pause and notice.

The difference is striking. When people hear "Elder," they respond with words like wisdom, resilience, purpose, and guidance. It evokes respect, strength, and clarity—a noble life lived with intention and insight.

Words Matter. Thoughts Are Words.

Which word would you choose to live your life out of? Elderly or Elder?

By doing this exercise, you discover that "Elderly" and "Elder" reside in completely different contexts.

The Elderly context carries the weight of being frail, outdated, and in need of assistance. It allows our culture to sidestep the complexities of aging

and focus only on physical and mental decline. The Elderly road sign says, "Dead End Ahead."

The Elderly label gets attached by age—when you reach a certain number, the culture tags you. And you don't get to decide when that happens; society decides for you. What's been tightly fastened to "Elderly" are unspoken assumptions that you've reached the end of the line. It's passive, often accompanied by pity, which leads directly to being sidelined.

Elder is an out-of-the-box phenomenon.

Unlike "Elderly," Elder carries gravitas. It generates respect because it embodies a well-lived, wise, and conscious life. An Elder isn't defined by body age—they're defined by mind, heart, and spirit, the culmination of years spent living with intention, contemplation, and reflection.

If Elderly is horizontal, Elder is vertical.

The Elder's Understanding

Elders have come to understand their deepest level of humanity. They recognize their higher purpose and comprehend the underlying reasons why the world and people behave as they do.

They have shifted:

From conventional wisdom to higher wisdom
From competitive nature to compassionate nature
From thinking about individual events to understanding the interrelatedness of all things

Elders come to know that impermanence is steadfast and unfailing.

In essence: "Elderly" is a word wrapped in the context of decline; "Elder" is a word woven in the context of leadership, wisdom, and contribution.

The first is an age, the second is a role.

The Contemporary Challenge

The primary challenge for an Elder today is adapting to and acting powerfully within our current culture—a culture that has completely collapsed the distinction between Elder and Elderly.

A Contemporary Elder explores how they need to be in the world to be welcomed and heard as sages in this culture. Their inquiry: "Who do I need to be, that I am now not being, to be seen and heard as an Elder?"

What Makes an Elder "Contemporary"

Contemporary refers to something that exists in the present time, in sync with current trends, ideas, and practices. It means "happening now."

So how can Elders be seen and welcomed as the sages of our day?

A Contemporary Elder must deeply internalize ancient wisdom—those time-tested truths about life, death, and human nature—and fully embrace them in daily life. This higher wisdom doesn't just inform their thinking; it shapes how they live and interact with the world.

Living as an Elder creates the capacity to speak and listen with profound insight. This lived experience of higher wisdom creates a presence of trust, a depth of understanding, and a way of listening that invites others to connect, reflect, and grow.

Being a Contemporary Elder means being an Elder for this time, this place, this moment in history, in this American culture. It's about discovering how to make ancient truths resonate in our fast-paced, fragmented, anxiety-producing, and uncertain Western world.

The Path Forward

The first step in becoming a Contemporary Elder is breaking free from the confines of being and living the label "Elderly."

Those on this path learn another way of thinking and being that transcends cultural stereotypes and imposed societal limitations. They embrace a path leading to self-understanding, self-empowerment, clarity, and purpose—a path no longer defined by age, but by the wisdom and influence they carry.

Contemporary Elders recognize that living from profound wisdom and higher consciousness transforms their experience of growing old. They discover a life with purpose and deeper connection and appreciation for the world around them.

Contemporary Elders take ancient wisdom and adapt it for modern life. They make timeless truths practical, relevant, and actionable, without watering them down. They speak in today's language while maintaining the principles that have grounded humanity for millennia.

Being a Contemporary Elder is not about getting older. It's about growing wiser. And using that wisdom to put the brakes on a culture that feels like it's heading toward the cliff.

Your turn: Which context will you choose to inhabit as you move through the last third of your life? The answer to that question will determine everything about how you experience these years—and how the world experiences you.

CEI Company - www.requestingwisdom.com

Author/Book - www.drmarcbcooper.com

LinkedIn - www. li nkedin.com/in/drmarcbcooper/

Substack - https://drmarcbcooper.substack.com/

Disconnection and Fragmentation

Thu, 19 Jun 2025 19:12:18 GMT

Disconnection and Fragmentation

[A 6-minute read with a musical ending]

The Crisis We Don’t See, The Crisis We Deeply Feel, The Crisis Elders Can Fix

You and I live in a world that's more connected than ever, yet somehow, we're more disconnected than ever. Paradoxes are funny that way.

It's like we're all holding hands in a circle, but instead of actually feeling each other, we're texting from across the room.

I live in Northwest Portland, Oregon. When I walk down Savier or Raleigh Street, I notice people walking by themselves, engrossed in their phones. The same applies to airports, waiting rooms, elevators, and family dinners. People are staying inside themselves. Maybe that's where it feels safest?

This is the heart of the modern dilemma: disconnection and fragmentation. Given that the mission of an Elder is to "repair" the world, Elders need to facilitate connecting again.

Understanding the Crisis

Disconnection is the feeling that we're isolated, despite being surrounded by people. It's that nagging sense that you're on your own island, even though there's a whole archipelago around you.

"Disconnected" refers to a state of being detached or separated from something or someone. It can be applied in various contexts—social, emotional, and cognitive. In all cases, being disconnected means a lack of connection or coherence between parts that would normally be joined together.

Human beings survived because of their connections, and now that connectedness is under siege.

Here's how the spiral works: Disconnection leads to disharmony, which leads to acrimony. Disconnection leads to righteousness, which leads to bigotry. Disconnection leads to fear, which leads to protectionism. Disconnection interferes with coherence, so people aren't joined together.

We need to post large warning signs in very large font and bold colors: "Social Media Worsens Disconnection." You can get 1,000 likes on your post, but how many of those people would you really trust?

While we're more digitally connected than ever, we have become more emotionally and spiritually disconnected. This is the wrong direction for peace, equanimity, grace, gratitude, and personal freedom to occur.

The Fragmentation That Follows

Fragmentation is the result of that disconnection. It's like taking a puzzle, throwing the pieces into the air, and hoping they'll all land in the right place.

Look at our country. People are scattered, divided by ideologies, geography, belief systems, economics, and now by the overwhelming speed of change. Uncertainty, chaos, instability, confusion, and indecision now frame our lives. No place to stand. No place of comfort. No control. The foundations on which we stood are disappearing.

We don't just disagree; we've stopped even trying to understand each other. It's all part of the disintegration of core values, shared purpose, and common ground—like a tapestry that's unraveling thread by thread.

There is a constant churn of new information, faster than we can process it, leading to emotional and intellectual whiplash. It's coming from all sides, all at once, all screaming for your attention.

Our politicians promote this disconnection with its communal core value disintegration and loss of coherence. It allows them to "gin up" voters and get themselves reelected. For politicians, it means more votes and more money. Keeping people disconnected and fragmented pays off.

The Obvious Impact

Disconnection and fragmentation aren't just abstract concepts; they have a direct impact on our state of mind, physical health, and sense of community.

Take a moment to remember the last time you were essentially disconnected—fired, relationship broken apart, death of a loved one, or attending a party where you didn't know anyone. What did it feel like to be disconnected?

Now imagine being disconnected as a chronic condition. Anxiety, depression, and a sense of helplessness become your constant companions, shadowing every step, every thought, and draining your energy until even the simplest tasks feel like monumental challenges.

This mental strain isn't just psychological; it manifests physically too. Studies show that chronic loneliness increases stress, raises blood pressure, and impairs immune function. You get sicker faster, and it takes longer to recover.

They say frailty is the primary cause of death in the old. But emotional death happens sooner than the hip-breaking fall. When disconnected, feeling isolated, alone, useless, and unwanted takes a heavy toll.

The Elder Fix

But here's where the Elders come in. This is their territory.

Elders—the kind I'm talking about, Contemporary Elders—aren't just people who've lived a long time. They're the keepers of wisdom, the anchors in a world that feels like it's constantly being pushed toward the edge of the cliff.

Elders can heal the disconnect and repair the fragmentation, and they don't even need a Wi-Fi signal to do it.

How Elders Restore Connection

Elders bring a sense of stability, a knowing that the storm isn't forever, even when it feels like it. They know how to listen—really listen. Not just nodding along while thinking about their schedule, but truly hearing what is being said. This listening provides the kind of deep, human connection that we need in a world where conversations are reduced to a series of sound bites and memes.

Elders understand the art of slowing down. They don't rush through life, and that's a powerful thing. In a society obsessed with speed and hustle, Elders demonstrate that there's power in making better decisions by taking your time. Recognizing the themes, patterns, and causes in a complex situation takes time.

Elders embody the value of reflection. They engage in self-reflective questions about themselves and effectively ask these questions of others—questions that pierce the facades, the self-deception, and reveal our greater humanity. This generates the space and conditions required for reconnecting to occur.

Elders have lived through decades of change, and they understand that real growth happens not in the blur of the moment but in the quiet spaces between. Elders know how to create the quiet space "between."

How Elders Heal Fragmentation

Then there's the fragmentation. Elders are the glue. They've seen it all. They've witnessed political turmoil, social revolutions, and personal tragedies.

Elders possess the wisdom and perspective to remind us that we're not alone on this planet. They have weathered the storms, and they can help guide us through the fog. Elders offer a steadying hand, a transferable calming presence, and the voice that says, "This too shall pass."

But Elders will also confront you about your responsibility in the matter. If you want to change things, stop complaining about them. Complaints keep things fixed. Either change the situation or change yourself.

Ready to Play

Elders are ready to play. They're suited up. They have their last names sewn onto the back of their team jerseys. Elders are ready to take the field. You can feel their readiness when you go into their locker room, and this song is blasting:

"Put me in, coach, I'm ready to play today. Look at me, I can play center field."

Listen here

Your Inquiry: Where in your life are you disconnected, and why do you allow it to remain that way? What's the cost? What's the payoff?

ANNOUNCEMENT 

The Elders' RFP (Request for Proposal)

Fri, 13 Jun 2025 13:44:15 GMT

The Elders' RFP (Request for Proposal)

INVESTORS, GET OUT YOUR CHECKBOOKS

"When a complex system is far from equilibrium, small islands of coherence in a sea of chaos have the capacity to shift the entire stream to a higher order." – Ilya Prigogine

The Crisis We're In

Let's not sugarcoat it. Our system is in total chaos. Not mild turbulence—more like the oxygen masks just dropped and nobody's flying the damn plane. You feel it, I feel it, everybody feels it.

Troops in the street. No habeas corpus. Economy in the Twilight Zone. L.A. exploding. Military parades. Thousands of protests. Annexation from the rest of the world. Craziness every day.

What's it worth calming this down?

We're not talking about uncomfortable change. We're talking about existential instability. Fear, uncertainty, a collective "what the hell is going on?" And when the culture starts capsizing, you don't add more noise—you bring in ballast.

Elders are that ballast.

The Solution: Islands of Coherence

Elders are the islands of coherence—stabilizing forces in a culture that's off its rocker. We're developing these islands now. Some have already been built. I've got three in existence.

We've figured out how to organize these groups, qualify the right candidates, and train, develop, and support them from Older to Elder. While Silicon Valley builds tools to distract us faster, Elders offer depth. Their technology is slower, but stronger. It recalibrates how people see time, purpose, community, and mortality.

Elders are living stabilizers. They don't accelerate the noise—they quiet it. They don't break what's broken—they realign it.

The Market Size: An Unstoppable Wave

You want numbers? We've got numbers.

The Demographic Explosion:

2022: 58 million Americans aged 65+
2030: Over 82 million (a 47% spike)
By 2050: More people over 65 than under 15

The proportion of the population aged 65+ will increase from 19% today to 23% by 2050. That's well past the "Tipping Point" of 20%—when a phenomenon reaches critical mass for cultural transformation.

The Economic Reality:

2022: Americans 65+ held $43.3 trillion in household wealth (nearly one-third of the nation's total)
For comparison: The entire U.S. economy (GDP) was $26 trillion
By 2050: Individuals 65+ projected to control more than 70% of U.S. wealth

That's not just retirement money. That's leverage. That's firepower. That's the fuel to light up an economy and cause a cultural renaissance.

Our Target Market: The OMG Opportunity

We applied the 80/20 rule to our formula. Of the 58 million people over 65, at least 12 million (20% of the total) have had professional careers requiring conventional wisdom for their success. Conventional wisdom is a qualifier that allows the leap from Older to Elder—you can't reach higher wisdom without first mastering conventional wisdom.

Applying 80/20 again, this 20% cohort accounts for 80% of the over-65 household wealth: $34.6 trillion.

Consider this: Over 10,000 people turn 65 every day. Technology, AI, and the subtle or overt push by younger generations to make room for themselves creates a vast and continuously expanding market that feels dislocated, unwanted, and obsolete. Their past is gone, and so are their previous identities.

Evidence: Proof of Concept and Purpose

The level of chaos will continue increasing significantly as mortal danger creeps into daily life. Chaos leads to unrest and confusion. Loss of life substantially heightens anxiety, fear, and worry.

The higher the threat, the higher the sense of risk, the more welcoming it becomes to have an Elder present. They evoke equanimity, peace, and perspective that mitigates these unsettling feelings. The feelings don't disappear, but after being with an elder, people deal with them differently.

According to our work to date, we've delivered proof of concept and proof of purpose. We can and do convert Older to Elder.

The Strategy: Elders as Disruptive Technology

So what's the secret sauce? Simple: Elders themselves are the strategy.

"Elder" is not just an advisor or figurehead, but a disruptive existential technology. Not tech like an app, but tech like a force that rewires how people think, act, and relate to circumstances.

Our enterprise, the Contemporary Elder Institute (CEI), is not a one-off. Well-established entities like the Modern Elder Academy, the Center for Conscious Aging, and Age Wave all work in various ways to develop Elders.

Our particular body of work, along with our specific models and processes, has delivered. We transform qualified, late-career professionals into sage, powerful Elders.

We believe our model is scalable—not in a repetitive franchise manner, but through a license model where various licensee groups adapt it to work best for their members. From Buddhist Sanghas to Existential Think Tanks, their members are becoming Elders.

From Passive to Powerful

Elders won't be passive observers in this next chapter. They're not warming seats in life's waiting room. They're moving to the front lines.

This isn't about aging gracefully. It's about aging powerfully. With purpose. With clarity. With the guts to challenge the direction of culture, government, and even the damn algorithms of AI.

Individuals, relationships, groups, businesses, communities, and nations will have a real need and want for what Elders provide.

Bottom Line

This isn't just about getting older. It's about growing wiser—and using that wisdom to reroute a culture in free fall.

Elders are stepping up. Elders are stepping in. They need funding to continue their evolution and transformation.

Because the next big wave will not be youth, not tech, not trends.

It will be the wisdom and presence of Elders—coherent, conscious, and ready to insert sage counsel.

So yes—investors, you really should get out your checkbooks.

If you want to invest in generating a culture that includes Elders at the tables where decisions are made, where values, ethics, wisdom, and compassion are strongly present, let me know.

Board positions are open for late-aged investors. Ask your Equity Partners, representing their investors, if it's worth knowing how to grow old as an

Elder, so that late life becomes a good life. As Elders, they would have the wisdom and power to become effective healers in and of the world.

Go ahead. Ask them where they'd like to put their money.

We are asking for $2.35 million.

You can respond to this RFP through LinkedIn , or Substack .

The Damaging Effects of Uncertainty and Chaos: How Elders Heal the Wounded [A 5-minute Read]

Wed, 04 Jun 2025 18:19:21 GMT

The Damaging Effects of Uncertainty and Chaos: How Elders Heal the Wounded

[A 5-minute Read]

An Elder's higher purpose is to heal the world. To act as a physician for the culture, a shaman for the nation, a spiritualist for communities, a sage for society, and a self-realized being for themselves.

Elders heal existential wounds, allowing a deeper humanity to emerge. "Existential" refers to human existence, particularly the nature of life itself, individual experience, and the search for meaning. These are wounds to who you are—and they are greatly exacerbated by uncertainty and chaos.

The Elder's Diagnosis: Locating the Wound

The Elders' initial diagnostic reveals that existential wounds manifest when individuals confront the fundamental questions of life: "How do you create meaning in a world that seems indifferent?" "What's the purpose of your life?" "What is your relationship to death, and how does it shape the way you live?"

These questions don't create the wounds—they expose them.

What actually causes these existential wounds are thoughts that act as primary etiologic agents. These are not random thoughts but deeply ingrained patterns of thinking that go unquestioned and unexamined. They are autonomous thoughts that repeat incessantly, unsolicited.

Thoughts that say, "It's being done to me." Thoughts that declare, "I am doing this to myself and can't stop it." Thoughts that shout, "The wheels are falling off the wagon, it's picking up speed, and I'm on the bus."

These thoughts demand your full attention. They insist: "Think me, think me."

The Amplifying Effect of Chaos

Here's what elders understand: these destructive thought patterns become exponentially louder and more insistent in the presence of uncertainty and chaos. The more uncertainty and chaos surround you, the higher the frequency of these intrusive, wounding thoughts.

Left unattended, these acute existential wounds become chronic. And chronic wounds—like the difference between COVID and Long COVID—are far more challenging to heal than acute ones.

The Hidden Nature of Existential Damage

Unlike your scraped knee or a cut from shaving that bleeds, existential wounds show no outward signs. The damage occurs inside, invisible to the world.

The emotions that accompany these wounds—fear, anxiety, confusion—scramble the self, leaving people feeling disconnected, lost, and uncertain about who they are and what their purpose is. Over time, invisible scars form, eventually clouding self-awareness, hindering personal growth, and preventing individuals from fully embracing their authentic selves.

The Elder's Treatment Protocol

But Elders, with their wisdom and experience, know how to heal these wounds and repair the damage they have caused. We understand which mental medicines to prescribe, what mindsets to adjust, and how to promote the healing process.

Elders offer two essential "peptides" for healing: the self-awareness peptide and the mindfulness peptide. These are taken daily, with or without food.

Here's how the healing process works:

First, like in all healing, the macrophages act first. In existential healing, they clear away old, unhelpful beliefs and emotional baggage, removing the debris and dead materials that clog the inner healing process.

After the debris is cleared, the T-cells arrive. These T-cells target and destroy the remaining barriers to healing—self-doubt, fear, and unresolved trauma. They then establish defenses, protecting you from future contamination. Much like physical immunity, existential immunity can fade over time, so regular "boosters" are recommended for long-term health.

The patient outcome? People begin to rediscover their inner truth and align with a more profound sense of meaning and direction.

How Elders Lead the Way Forward

Uncertainty and chaos will likely persist for years to come, but that doesn't mean we have to fall apart under their weight. Elders, with our years of experience and accumulated wisdom, are uniquely equipped to lead through these times. We've weathered many storms before and understand how to rebuild once the winds have settled.

This is where the elder's higher wisdom becomes essential. We allow uncertainty to be seen as an opportunity for growth, a path to foster resilience, and a doorway to lean into the support of our communities. We can not only survive the chaos and uncertainty—we can learn from it, grow through it, and emerge stronger.

When we heal ourselves through this elder pathway, we simultaneously help heal the world around us. This is the elder's gift to humanity: showing others how to dance in the rain instead of fearing the storm.

Your Healing Journey Begins Now

Let's begin your existential healing process by engaging in these questions and sharing your response in the comment section:

"What are the various ways I react to constant uncertainty and chaos? I am... I become... I go..."
"What are the benefits of my reacting this way?" (Yes, there are absolutely benefits you get from reacting to chaos and uncertainty in the way you do. If it has costs, it has benefits. Take a hard look.)

Remember: recognition is the first stage of conscious change. You can't choose another path unless you see the path you're on.

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The Necessity of Balancing Intellect with Wisdom

Tue, 27 May 2025 14:20:43 GMT

The Necessity of Balancing Intellect with Wisdom

Why Intellect Without Wisdom Is Dangerous

In our knowledge-obsessed society, intellect reigns supreme—the crown jewel promising success, progress, and that elusive pot of gold at rainbow's end. The problem? Intellect finds the rainbow irrelevant.

Intellect, with its razor-sharp reasoning and analysis, is undeniably valuable. But here's the enigma that's reshaping our world:

Wisdom is the missing ingredient that transforms intellect's raw power into sustainable, meaningful progress.

Elders understand this alchemy. They know how to guide intellect's potential toward purposes that serve humanity rather than consume it.

When Intellect Goes Rogue

When wisdom is absent and intellect operates unchecked, our culture becomes dangerously misguided. It's like having a GPS that insists you drive into a lake because technically, it's the shortest route.

Relying solely on intellect without wisdom's guidance leads to decisions that seem logical on spreadsheets but lack depth, compassion, and any consideration of the human cost.

The results are everywhere:

In Technology: Facebook prioritizes profit over stopping hate speech. Uber skirts safety regulations for market share. Amazon delivers to your doorstep in a day while pushing its workforce with relentless efficiency demands that treat humans as expendable resources.

In Finance: Wells Fargo opened millions of unauthorized accounts to meet targets—pure intellect serving itself while betraying the trust of millions.

In Infrastructure: The automobile industry's early influence on highway development over commuter rail systems created the sprawling, car-dependent cities we're stuck with today. Los Angeles is the monument to intellect without wisdom.

Intellect doesn't care about you. It only cares about itself.

The AI Acceleration Problem

Now, with AI turbocharging intellect into the stratosphere of data streams and algorithms, we've given intellect rocket power and hypersonic speed. This makes wisdom more urgently needed than ever.

AI is like a teenager with a sports car—fast, flashy, and capable of getting places quickly. But without proper guidance, it's bound to crash, leaving everyone scrambling to pick up the pieces.

Consider the environmental reality: AI's appetite for energy is staggering. Data centers are popping up everywhere, consuming resources and emitting carbon at a pace that makes coal plants look environmentally friendly by comparison. These power-hungry data farms suck down electricity like there's no tomorrow—and maybe there won't be.

AI generates insights that may or may not help humanity solve problems, but it's certainly not addressing the environmental crisis it's creating. As Orwell wrote in 1984, "Ignorance is bliss"—and intellect prefers ignorance when it comes to taking responsibility for its consequences.

Without wisdom's guidance, AI drives at top speed, leaving a trail of resource consumption, e-waste, and energy demands while our planet gasps for air.

Elders: The Home Where Wisdom Lives

This is where Elders become essential.

Elders are wisdom's home—the sanctuary where it resides, nurtures, and grows strong enough to guide intellect toward humanity's benefit.

Wisdom asks the questions intellect has been avoiding. It stops intellect's performance of being "good" and demands real accountability. When an Elder asks these questions, they carry the weight of lived experience—and they get answered.

Elders have survived enough cycles—pandemics, wars, recessions, presidential transitions—to grasp the interconnectedness that intellect misses. At 80, I've lived through 4 major pandemics, 9 recessions, 6 wars with American boots on the ground, and Trump is my 15th president. This gives me perspective that pure intellect cannot provide.

An Elder's wisdom functions as a gyroscope—maintaining orientation, balance, and stability while enabling internal navigation through uncertainty.

In a world where intellect dazzles but blinds, Elders offer wisdom that actually sees clearly and engages people where intellect alone cannot reach.

The Urgent Call

The solution couldn't be clearer: we need Elders and their wisdom at decision-making tables alongside intellect so that a different future becomes possible.

Right now, when our country isn't working and anxiety runs high, this is precisely the moment when Elders can step up and guide us toward wisdom-informed choices rather than intellect-only disasters.

The time for Elder wisdom has arrived. The question is: will you answer the call?

Koan of the Week

The Blade and the River

A young monk asked the master, "What is the difference between intellect and wisdom?"

The master held up a knife blade and said, "Intellect cuts through obstacles."

Then he pointed to the river and said, "Wisdom flows around them."

Video of the Week

Wisdom vs Intellect - The Hidden Truth Behind Your Problems

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Everybody knows our country isn't working and is getting worse. This is the moment where the pain and anxiety are high enough to enable Elders to step in, step up, and guide the future.

Joining this community, you'll be at the forefront of a cultural shift already well underway. Elder as a recognized force in our culture is becoming very real. The wind is now at our backs.

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IN THE PRESENCE OF MY TEACHER

Wed, 21 May 2025 13:40:34 GMT

IN THE PRESENCE OF MY TEACHER

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Thank you, President Trump

Wed, 07 May 2025 12:00:28 GMT

Thank you, President Trump

THE POWER OF DUALITY

Elders understand that life operates on duality. You can’t have up without down, in without out, good without bad. It's the way the world works; contrast defines us.

So, Mr. Trump, you have shown up to remind us of what truly matters. You are here to challenge us, to shake us out of our complacency and force us to confront what we've become too comfortable with.

In that way, you're playing the most pivotal role in stirring us awake. You are an incessant, disturbing reminder of the dualities we’ve ignored, the contradictions we’ve avoided.

And, whether we like it or not, Mr. Trump, you are doing us a favor by prompting us to reexamine our values. You have reminded, aroused, and awakened us to our true nature and what is most meaningful about being human.

WHY DUALITIES EXIST

Without dualities, there would be nothing. Life would be like staring at a blank canvas in a world without color—monochromatic, uniform, utterly lacking in definition.

Imagine a world where there’s no difference between joy and sorrow, no contrast between success and failure. That’s what a world without duality would be: static, colorless, and lifeless.

Duality gives our lives the richness they need. You can't understand wealth without poverty, health without sickness, or love without hate. Without these contrasts, we couldn’t evolve or grow. We couldn't have the clarity to understand ourselves or the world.

Loss makes us appreciate gain. Struggle builds strength. Loneliness gives us a deeper appreciation for companionship. These dualities exist because they help us deepen our awareness and see the bigger picture.

Through comparison, we understand the differences that define us. Trump, in all your complexities and contradictions, you are part of that picture. You embody the extremes we’ve been avoiding responding to, the contradictions we’ve refused to acknowledge.

But here’s the thing: that discomfort you create is necessary. It’s the spark we need to ignite real change. It forces us to examine our values and priorities and realign ourselves with what truly counts.

ROCKET FUEL FOR CONTEMPORARY ELDERS

Contemporary Elders have found themselves caught between this Autocratic and Independent duality. As Elders, we have had to reevaluate our beliefs like never before. We began to see ourselves inside this tension of this duality, not just who we thought we were, but who we were at the very core. You blew the doors open to our fundamental humanity.

We were forced to question what we honor, what we've taken for granted, and what holds real value in our lives. This realization was profound and transformative.

For Elders, this awakening shifted everything. It pushed us to take ownership of our actions, our values, and the choices we were making. It challenged us to strip away the illusions we’ve clung to, both personal and cultural. Self-deceptions fell away. The illusion that someone else was responsible departed.

Faced with this duality, we started recognizing when we acted out of fear rather than purpose. We noticed how we were responding to life's challenges, with either clarity and strength, or simply sticking to what was safe and easy.

We Got There by Checking our Boxes. We noted that we were:

 [ ] Shifting the blame

 [ ] Passing the buck

 [ ] Evading accountability

 [ ] Disbelieving the obvious

 [ ] Renouncing any ownership

 [ ] Abdicating responsibility

 [ ] Shifting the focus

Checking the boxes sparked a profound shift. No longer passive, Elders started actively choosing our path, guided by what matters most. The chaos and noise of the world no longer sweeping us helplessly along.

Elders are stepping into their truth, becoming fully aware of the power we hold. We’re not just observers anymore; we’re becoming the leaders. This whole Authoritative versus Autonomous tension has become our crucible, refining us, sharpening our sense of self, and strengthening us to take a stand.

Elders are no longer afraid to confront the uncomfortable, to face our flaws, or to claim the wisdom we've earned. We’re emerging stronger, clearer, and more certain. We’re leading from a place of authenticity, no longer accepting the world as it is.

What started as a wake-up call is now a full-blown transformation. The discomfort that once challenged us is the fire fueling our evolution. We’re stepping into this new chapter with a deep sense of purpose, sharper wisdom, and a fierce commitment to guiding others through today's mess.

SO, THANK YOU, PRESIDENT TRUMP

You’ve unknowingly fueled the rise of the Contemporary Elder, giving us the growth hormone we needed to gain true relevance and recognition in today’s world.

In creating a culture of extremes, you’ve forced us to confront the core of our being, our most profound humanity. By sharpening the dualities that have always existed, you’ve made them more distinct, allowing us Elders to step forward with clarity, purpose, and power.

In this new landscape, Elders have the opportunity to lead from a place of wisdom and transformation—our higher selves emerging in the face of polarization.

We can’t thank you enough.

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Together, Elders can inspire meaningful change, create a legacy of wisdom, and demonstrate a profound impact Elders have on the world.

You have a choice about how you grow old. Growing old as an elder is a noble and inspiring path. Join me on the El Camino del Anciano, The Path of the Elder.

HOW ELDERS GOT THEIR “COOL”

Tue, 29 Apr 2025 19:56:14 GMT

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COOL
In American slang, the word "cool" has evolved beyond its literal meaning of temperature and now refers to a state of being that conveys admiration, respect, or approval.

“Cool” describes someone fashionable, impressive, calm under pressure, and generally worthy of admiration.

When someone is “cool,” they are seen as confident, composed, and effortlessly in control of their situation. They are considered sophisticated, with a style or attitude that others find attractive or admirable.

Elders have freed themselves from the cultural concepts of “older.” Their practices, communities, wisdom, higher purpose, the way they speak, and their somewhat mystical presence are now becoming seen as “cool.”

But the most remarkable thing about Elders, and what makes them so “cool,” is that they don’t care about being “cool.” As Steve Carell is quoted as saying, “Maybe the coolest people are the ones who don't care about being cool.”

How Elders Have Become Cool
So, how do Elders get their cool?

Elders understand themselves, their humanity, and the world in a way that most never fully grasp—and that understanding brings them peace, happiness, humor, and a profound ease in life.

Elders don’t rush. They take their time and thoughtfully observe before they act. They know that decisions made in haste often miss crucial details. So, they step back, delay immediate responses, and deliberate on the hidden aspects that only become clear after thorough examination.

They understand that true clarity lies “deeper down,” beneath the surface of their initial reactions. In this “deeper down” space, they uncover what’s been hidden, shedding self-deception to get there, revealing how they've constructed their self-view.

Elders see themselves, others, and the world in a more transparent light. It’s like lifting the hood and shining a flashlight on what's really going on inside. And the best flashlight for this job is Reflection.

REFLECTION & CONTEMPLATION
Reflection is about looking back at one’s experiences, actions, or thoughts to learn from them. It’s about understanding what happened, why, and how it felt.

Elders are like skilled detectives, figuring out what they missed the first time around. They suddenly see the clues that have been overlooked. They understand the tyranny of the obvious—it’s always been there but unnoticed until now. And now, it can’t be missed.

Reflection opens the door to contemplation, which is where things go deeper. Contemplation is an intentional process in which the focus shifts beyond reviewing the past and exploring the underlying, personal why and how. It is the key to understanding what makes us who we are. It makes our mechanisms clear.

While reflection provides the raw material, contemplation is where insight transforms into wisdom. Elders mine this gold from their experiences. In Japanese, they call this "aha taken," the "aha" experience.

Elders know their first reaction will be reactionary—it’s human nature and impossible to avoid. But where others dive headfirst into emotionally charged, knee-jerk responses, Elders step back. They give themselves time to shift from the subjective, emotional response to the objective, thoughtful response.

By becoming aware of their initial bias and applying conscious thought, they can view an issue from multiple angles, connecting dots that would have been missed in the initial rush.

Today, much of the world, especially politics, operates on quick, emotion-driven decisions. There’s little room for reflection and contemplation, which would shift subjective noise into objective clarity.

Elders don’t get rattled. Elders don’t get “sucked in.” Elders see the cause of why things are the way they are. Elders bring the presence of a sage. Elders understand how to reflect and then contemplate. Elders understand humanity, theirs and yours. And that’s what makes them so damn cool.

Can you apply the wisdom and calm approach of the Elders in your own life? What’s one area in which you could bring greater reflection and contemplation? Just sit with it. Please do it. Notice what you now see about yourself that you never noticed before? Let me know what you found out.

Listen: The Next Chapter with Charlie Hedges - Episode #361 Marc Cooper: Becoming a Modern Elder

Contemplation: Its Absence Is Wrecking Us

Tue, 22 Apr 2025 23:04:52 GMT

Contemplation: Its Absence Is Wrecking Us

Contemplation is the ability to direct the mind to what’s important. If contemplation became practiced among politicians, it would radically reduce the volume of bad decisions, suffering, economic breakdowns, and disruptive uproars.

Today's politics is like a caffeine-charged sprint: rapid responses to polls, social media meltdowns, and partisan tantrums. It’s more like a field of scatterbrains going in every direction, with no defined out-of-bounds.

What would happen if contemplation took the lead at the table and acquired leadership for a while? [Hint: that’s what Elders do.]

Imagine slowing down their urge to react and fostering reflection before firing off tweets or statements. Leaders would stop asking, “How will this play in the next news cycle? Will this demonstrate my loyalty?” Instead, they would replace it with, “What will this mean for future generations?”

Crazy, right?

Contemplation is more than just thinking, it’s like a mental workout that deepens one's understanding of existence, knowledge, and reality. And that surfaces what’s important.

While our politicians are busy jumping from one emotional reaction to the next, they’re missing the benefit of long-term reflection. Short-term thinking is like fast food—cheap, quick, and with little staying power.

Contemplation is like that deeply satisfying slow-cooked stew that sticks with you, offering clarity and connection with yourself, others, and the world.

Contemplation involves deep reflection and thoughtful consideration before acting. Its opposite involves acting immediately without careful thought.

Experiencing chaos, uncertainty, and thoughtlessness feels like being caught in a turbulent storm, where everything swirls around you without a clear path forward. It's like standing in the midst of a dense fog, where you can't see what's ahead, and each step feels uncertain and precarious.

Contemplation would blow away the fog.

Contemplation takes you out of the swirl, disorientation, flurry of negative thinking, fear, and anxiety. It squares you up, calms you down, and opens the door to do the right thing.

The Contemplation Killer: Our “Now, Now, Now” Society

In today’s world, contemplation is like the old-school nerd that no one wants to hang out with. Why? It doesn’t fit in with our need for instant gratification.

Technology, social media, and AI have trained us to respond at the speed of light. You're considered outdated if you don’t have an answer within seconds.

Our culture rewards sound bites, quick fixes, and shallow responses. AI is turning this into hyperdrive, speeding up decisions faster than our brains can even process. But what happens when we pause?

What happens when we take the time to consider all angles, the long-term impact, and the yet-seen consequences? That’s where wisdom is found. That’s what contemplation yields. The result of contemplation is wisdom.

Contemplation is the antidote to emotional, shallow-thought, knee-jerk reactions. It’s that quiet moment where clarity bubbles up to the surface, making complex decisions easier to navigate.

If leaders began practicing contemplation, we’d see a shift towards more thoughtful, strategic problem-solving. And this isn’t just some feel-good luxury. Looking around, it’s now necessary for our survival.

Imagine a Future Where Leaders Actually Thought Before Acting

What if our future weren’t shaped by impulsive, emotionally charged decisions but by leaders who actually took time to reflect? What if they asked,

How will this decision impact my constituents’ daily lives and their children and grandchildren, before pushing 'send”?

Contemplation isn’t some mysterious, fluffy concept, it’s a deliberate, mindful practice that brings clarity and understanding. It’s a puzzle to be solved, not just some pretty picture to admire.

If we want a future where we make better decisions and bridge the gaps between us, we must bring contemplation into decision-making conversations.

At the Contemporary Elder Institute, we’ve built a hybrid model that facilitates people's learning to contemplate. Using Socratic inquiry, Appreciative Inquiry, meditation, and philosophical reflection, learning and practicing contemplation helps members engage with life in a way that invites more profound thinking with lasting impact. It allows our members to live an inspired life. It allows them relief from the storm.

ELDERS PRACTICE CONTEMPLATION

Elders have learned to pause before jumping into action, realizing that decisions made in haste are nearly always short-sighted and rarely sustainable.

They ask themselves, "What’s the bigger picture?" How did we get here? What will the future be like if we continue this way?” Without those reflective moments, decisions are just stimulus-response reactions, nothing more. A quick belch of thoughtlessness.

When I say Elders are desperately needed at the decision-making table, this is why. Imagine a world where leaders made decisions based on objectivity, facts outweighed personal agendas, and the future was about the common good and long-term improvement.

With an Elder at the table, conversations would shift, people would listen, relationships would improve, and decisions would be long-term.

But alas, that is a wide gap to close, but we’re getting closer to a breakthrough.

ACKNOWLEDGMENT TO READERS

The vision, mission, and realization of Contemporary Elders have moved closer to being fulfilled. In 2024-2025, we’ve done nine podcasts with influencers, two national radio shows, sixty blog posts, decent book sales, several personal invitations to speak with recognized leaders in “the growing old” industry, and two new groups at the institute engaged in becoming Elders.

The wind is blowing in the right direction now. Given the external turbulence of politics, it's reaching gale-force proportions. The wind is almost strong enough to host the jib, but the main sail is full, making sailing easier.

Thank you, readers, for getting on board.

THE WORLD IS THE ULTIMATE GURU

Thu, 10 Apr 2025 17:41:42 GMT

THE WORLD IS THE ULTIMATE GURU

You Are What Is Requested of You

[a 5 to 6-minute read]

After listening to another bout of my complaints, one of my outstanding teachers often repeated the phrase, “The world is your ultimate guru.”

Relating to the world as a guru was a tough training and development assignment for me. But having a renowned teacher, someone who guides philosophical inquiry, life wisdom, and existential questions, if he said something rather than question whether it made sense or not, I took it as a truth that I didn’t understand, that needed to be understood.

He was a sage who taught me abstract ideas to guide my development and deeper understanding of life and self. So, I finally surrendered and engaged with the concept that “the world is the ultimate guru.”

I began with the words themselves, which is the usual way for me to open a consciousness-raising inquiry. Start with the objective, rather than get sucked into the subjective. A koan cannot be solved in the subjective.

What does the word guru mean?

The term "guru" comes from the Sanskrit word meaning "teacher" or "master," but a guru's role extends far beyond instruction. A guru provides a special relationship and a condition that delivers profound spiritual guidance, transformative wisdom, and deep personal growth while nurturing a profound connection between disciple and spiritual truth. Gurus open you to a deeper understanding of yourself, the world, and yes, the cosmos.

Now, after knowing the “who” and the “what” of a guru, I was taken to the next layer, which was understanding the guru's responsibilities.

A guru’s responsibility is to deliver higher wisdom, provide their students with new understanding to navigate both the inner and outer worlds, and help them reach higher levels of consciousness, personal growth, and understanding.

I didn't feel I got any of that from the world, maybe a few select spots and people, but not the rest of the world. It was more of a struggle than ease, flow, and harmony, where things unfold naturally without resistance or difficulty. That was not my experience of the world. Strain, scuffle, scrap, fight, was more my experience.

But my teacher’s teachings always turned out to be both personally and universally true, so I knew I was missing something.

It was difficult for me to comprehend the world, this world, with its pain, hate, suffering, threats, and wars. I also found it challenging to experience the world as my master instructor, a trustworthy guide on my journey of self-realization and awakening. I wanted to escape the world's awfulness, not have it be my teacher.

But as I followed “the world is the ultimate guru,” I began learning its overpowering lessons. One of these critical and transformational lessons was the harshest, most authentic, and most accurate. That lesson taught me the way the world knows me. And maybe that’s much more of the real me.

THE WORLD SPEAKS IN REQUESTS

The world was telling me directly who I am to the world by what was being asked of me. What requests were people making of me? That was the “real-real.” Self-deception has no power here. The world is a highly accurate yet disinterested party, The world is an absolute straight shooter.

You know who you are in the world, not by what you think of yourself, but by the requests made of you. What you are putting out, consciously and unconsciously, is coming straight back at you in the form of requests.

As an aside, an invitation is a weak request, so fold invitations into this conversation.

A request or invitation is the unabashed, bare bones truth about how the world perceives and understands you.

Back long ago, when I was in college, a pre-med requirement was Organic Chemistry. Part of an organic molecule carries its fraternal or its identical twin as part of the constituent molecular makeup. The twin is called an isomorph. There are some isomorphs called enantiomers, which are exact mirror images of each other.

New Paragraph

WHAT ELDERS ARE GOING TO DO ABOUT IT

Wed, 02 Apr 2025 16:48:54 GMT

WHAT ELDERS ARE GOING TO DO ABOUT IT

Harness Elders as Islands of Coherence

[A 6-minute read]

When asked

This is my answer to what I am now frequently asked: “Marc, you claim Elders can change the world and the direction it's headed? How can they do that?”

What first needs to be acknowledged is that the question itself serves as a validation of how “Elder,” as we define it, is now being heard in the world.

It appears that I’ve developed enough “street cred” and professional acceptance, backed by a body of published and posted materials, including books, blogs, podcasts, and videos, to establish myself as legitimate, as well as the concept of Contemporary Elder.

Being "held as legitimate" means being recognized as valid, credible, or authorized by others, particularly by those in positions of influence or authority.

When something is regarded as legitimate, it is accepted as real, rightful, or deserving of respect in accordance with established standards, laws, or norms.

I’ve now established solid relationships in the aging and end-of-life care industries. I am now invited to conferences as a keynote speaker, conference speaker, or panel member of authorities. “Contemporary Elder” has firmly staked its claim. My assertion that Elders can change the world is now being taken seriously.

It took seven years, which was my fastest and most successful time moving from vision to reality. It was as if the conditions were perfectly aligned, like the first rays of sunlight breaking through the clouds, signaling that the time for the 'Contemporary Elder' had arrived.

" Older to Elder" has become a recognizable moniker and is held in high regard. It has solid numbers in readership, programs, and membership. Now, leaders, groups, nonprofits, for-profit companies, investors, healthcare entities, insurance companies, and corporations are listening differently to what “Elder” means in 2025 and what Elders can deliver.

So, the “who” part is now established, but the “how” now needs to be shown.

THE FUNDAMENTALS OF THE STRATEGY

In their 1989 Harvard Business Review article "Strategic Intent," Gary Hamel and C.K. Prahalad argue that companies should focus on achieving a clear, compelling goal that drives their strategy, rather than merely replicating competitors' advantages. They define strategic intent as "an ambitious and compelling dream that energizes... that provides the emotional and intellectual energy for the journey... to the future."

Here's mine.

Amid today’s societal upheaval and complexity, Nobel Prize-winning chemist Ilya Prigogine's assertion that "small islands of coherence in a sea of chaos elevate the entire system to a higher order” remains highly relevant. This statement is at the core of the Elder strategy.

Coherence in this context refers to the alignment of wisdom, purpose, and action that fosters stability, clarity, and ethical leadership within our current state of chaos and our responses to it.

Coherence in this strategy refers to the Elders' capacity to integrate their lived experiences, values, insights, and wisdom into a unified force that guides others through uncertainty, chaos, and fear.

Elders can provide a sense of order, direction, and resilience, ultimately elevating society to a higher, more harmonious state.

I’ve developed Older to Elder groups where members have become authentic Elders in their own right. Other groups around the country are developing Elders in their models. Chip Conley’s Modern Elder and Ron Penvy’s Conscious Eldering, for example.

Our strategy is to build islands of coherence through small Elder groups nationwide, creating a transformative presence that is AI-enabled.

These groups will serve as hubs of wisdom, ethical leadership, and long-term vision, with the capacity to profoundly influence societal direction. The goal is not only to create strong, self-sustaining networks of Elders but also to leverage their collective wisdom, their immense wealth, and their combined influence to ensure they play a dominant and decisive role in shaping the future.

I used the 80/20 rule in my estimates. Given all the qualities and characteristics required to become a Contemporary Elder, I estimated that there are approximately 12 million late-aged individuals (aged 65 to 80 years) out of the 57 million in the country who are eligible to transition from older to Elder Status. In addition, these 12 million individuals hold 80% of the wealth of this late-age cohort.

The aggregated wealth of these 12 million is $12 trillion, compared to the $2 trillion of the aggregated wealth of tech companies led by Musk, Bezos, Altman, and the rest of the “tech bros.” That’s a 900% difference. Elders can sit at the table with piles and piles of chips in front of them.

Understanding Elder and the Make-Up of These Islands of Coherence

Elders, in the context of this strategy, represent individuals who have not only lived long lives but have also experienced a wide range of profound and diverse life events, relationships, and challenges. They graduated with honors from the school of Hard Knocks. In fact, most went back and did their graduate work there as well.

Elders know themselves, understand themselves, and know the world from a more expansive perspective. They acknowledge their past but are no longer defined by it.

Elders have developed a long-term perspective that enables them to see beyond immediate concerns, recognizing patterns and connections that others often overlook. Through their experiences, they have developed a profound understanding of life’s complexities, embodying qualities that transcend mere age.

Elders are marked by resilience, the ability to endure and adapt in the face of adversity. They have cultivated empathy, which enables them to understand and connect deeply with others' emotions and experiences.

Elders have a profound appreciation for the future of humanity, understanding its potential and its frailties. They can tap into their own potential and are now aware of their frailties, not as failures but as facts of life.

These Elders possess the wealth, smarts, and the ability to foresee where the current future is headed; they are committed to mitigating the suffering that is on the rise. Elders know that people want peace, equanimity, and tranquility. And when networked, these “islands of coherence” have the strength to bring about this change.

THE AI PART OF THE STRATEGY – Elder-AI

In the fourth quarter of 2025, the Contemporary Elder Institute (CEI) will build an Elder-AI. We have the developers, the AI platform, and the depth of information, knowledge, and data necessary to assemble this AI application.

I’ll ask my colleagues to participate so we can access their data as well as the volumes that already exist on the internet. We’ll all use it in our work. Machine learning, neural networks, data insatiable hunger, data from Aristotle to today's Noam Chomsky.

You can consult Elder-AI for advice on any situation, whether personal, relational, familial, or business-related, receiving responses infused with Elder wisdom. Moreover, its ability to connect these islands of coherence will continually enhance their learning, performance, and connections with each other.

CONCLUSION

Now you have the “who” and the “how.” It is already in motion. The first steps have been taken.

In conclusion, harnessing Elders as islands of coherence in today's chaotic world represents a transformative approach to societal evolution.

When Elder-AI collaborates, makes recommendations, and provides insights, it will maximize the network effect of coherence. By recognizing the unique contributions of an Elder—wisdom, resilience, and ethical leadership—Elders can catalyze a shift toward a more harmonious and sustainable future.

Through deliberate engagement, advocacy, and community-building efforts, Elders can inspire collective action and empower future generations to navigate complexities with clarity, compassion, and confidence.

Embracing elders as architects of societal change not only honors their legacy but also ensures that their profound impact continues to shape a world of greater coherence and possibility.

THE QUESTION

When Elder-AI is available, what question would you like it to answer? Your questions will help us build our Elder-AI.

The Elder’s Inheritance – A Fable

Tue, 25 Mar 2025 19:14:45 GMT

The Elder’s Inheritance – A Fable

Once upon a time, there was a middle-aged traveler named David, who embarked on a journey through the world, unsure of what lay ahead but deeply aware that something was calling to him.

It was not a material treasure anymore. David had been a miner for these treasures for 30 years. He mined enough vanes to do well enough, but the vans always ran out, which kept him digging.

David wasn’t looking for a specific destination either. He was being drawn to, but something more elusive, something intangible.

David encountered many a few along the way, each at different stages of their own journey. Some had lived many years, some younger. Yet, all seemed to carry something deeper—an essence that David could not quite grasp, and although he tried, he couldn’t get his fingers on it.

There was a quiet strength about these people, a calmness in their presence that seemed to soothe the chaos of the world around them. They had a way of listening, of seeing beyond the surface, and speaking with words that felt both ancient and yet new.

One day, as David was now on one his many nature hikes, David met an old woman who sat beneath an old tree on a bench from a fallen log. She was gazing out into the valley, a soft breeze flowing through the tall Fir, Hemlock and Spruce above making that noise that only created when leaves are rustled by the by the wind.

Her face lined with the traces of time. She radiated a presence that David immediately recognized as the one he had been seeking. David could feel that essence, that spirit, that space, that essence he wanted for himself.

"Are you an Elder?" David asked, his voice filled with both reverence and curiosity. The old woman smiled, her eyes twinkling with a wisdom that seemed to extend beyond time itself. "I am," she said simply.

“What’s it like being an Elder?” asked David.

"Becoming an Elder is not something that can be learned from books or teaching alone. It is an inheritance passed down through generations—a gift, not of material wealth, but of something far deeper."

The old woman gestured for David to sit beside her on the moss covered log. "This inheritance is not something you can hold in your hands. It is wisdom, stories, experiences, and values that have been passed down, not just through your own life, but through the lives of countless others who have come before you.”

She paused and looked downward at her age-spots on her hands seeming amused by them.

“It is the very essence of being an Elder—a presence that comes from living deeply, from embracing both the light and the shadow of your own journey."

David listened intently, the words sinking into them like seeds planted in fertile soil.

"This inheritance," the old woman continued, "is not about knowing facts or accumulating knowledge. It is about becoming a container for wisdom—not just your own, but the wisdom of all those who have walked before you.”

David began to see the past continues into the present and has its place in it.

She took another long pause and then continued; “This inheritance is about seeing the invisible thread that connects the past, present, and future. It is the yeast that makes the bread of higher wisdom rise. And in this, as an Elder, you will find your true power."

As David pondered these words, he began to understand. Becoming an Elder was not about age alone, nor was it about what one possessed. It was about a deepening presence—a way of being that radiates from within.

The old woman shuffled her fee in the dirt as she spoke. “Being an Elder is a quiet, soft strength. It comes with a calling to serve something greater than yourself. It is the ability to hold space for others, to be a witness to their lives not the answer, and to offer wisdom that emerges from a place deeper than memory or intellect.”

"I think I understand," David said, "that an Elder’s wisdom cannot be taught in classrooms, in books, or on various screens. It is something gained through direct experience and awareness, through reflection, and through contemplation.”

David recognized Elder possessed a kind of wisdom that arises in the stillness, in the moments when you listen deeply to both your inner voice and the voices of those who came before you."

David had worked on a Native American Reservation in his early twenties and saw how the tribes included their ancestors in their daily life. They felt their presence. They spoke their names. They told their stories. They were part of their everyday existence.

After a long pause. She broke the silence with "As an Elder, you will find that the words you speak will not always be your own. They will be words born from the depths of your being, they will carry with them the weight of all those who have guided them and are guiding you. Elders speak eternal truths.

“Those words you did not know are there when you will speak with assurance, not because you have rehearsed, but because your words carry the wisdom of an Elder.”

David sat in silence, feeling the enormity of what had been shared. He realized that the true inheritance of an Elder was not something that could be grasped with the hands—it was a legacy that lived in the heart, passed down through the generations, woven into the very fabric of your being.

"For you see," the old woman said softly, "an Elder knows they did not arrive here alone. They were guided by the hands of their own Elders, those who have walked the path before and with them. They are part of a lineage that stretches back through time, and they are connected to it, not as a relic of the past, but as a living presence, part of the unfolding future."

David began to feel the weight of this truth, and in that moment, he understood the responsibility that came with this inheritance. It was not just about living a long life. It was about becoming a living bridge—connecting the wisdom of the past with the possibilities of the future.

"Your duty," the old woman concluded, "is to pass on what you have inherited. To share the wisdom, the stories, the love, and the challenges that have shaped you. For in doing so, you honor not just yourself, but every Elder who has ever walked this path before you."

ACKNOWLEDGEMENT OF MY ELDERS
I have followed this track of my Elders. I became part of their legacy. And they had elders before them, reaching back hundreds of generations, each one passing down wisdom, strength, and stories that have shaped the very fabric of who I am.

In their footsteps, I have found my purpose—not as an isolated being, but as a link in an unbroken chain of wisdom that stretches across time, connecting me to the past, guiding me in the present, and empowering me to pass it forward to those who will come after me.

I stand here, not just as a recipient, but as a steward of this inheritance, carrying the torch of my Elders into the future.

HIGHER PURPOSE THE ELDERS PATHWAY TO LIBERATION (A 5-Minute Read)

Wed, 19 Mar 2025 11:54:15 GMT

HIGHER PURPOSE

THE ELDERS PATHWAY TO LIBERATION

(A 5-Minute Read)

THE BOTTOM LINE:

One of the Contemporary Elder Institute’s foundational principles is that standing in and for a higher purpose is the key to freedom and achieving true emancipation from today’s troubling, uncertain, and chaotic conditions.

Read again, read slower, understand exactly what it means and then think about what it would mean in your life if it were true.

Our foundational principle is that standing in and for a higher purpose is the key to freedom and achieving true emancipation from today’s troubling, uncertain, and chaotic conditions.

This principle emphasizes that your path to freedom, self-sovereignty, inner peace in today's uncertain and chaotic world rests in living and acting in accord with your higher purpose.

HOW DOES HIGHER PURPOSE WORK?

Here’s what we, as contemporary elders, have learned about adopting and embedding our higher purpose.

Embracing alignment with your respective higher purpose directs your actions, decisions, and intentions toward a deeper sense of meaning and a commitment to something greater than yourself.

Your ego and identity issues ungrasp.

You operate from a commitment now governed by your higher purpose. Minimal external noise distorts the calling. Your line to your higher purpose has no static.

You embody a higher purpose which allows you to override much of your internal unsubstantiated assessments, judgements, explanations about yourself and others. Those thoughts show up as “junk mail.”

Your choices, how you speak and what you say to yourself and others, how you act in your relationships, and what you do in the world—yes, all shift.

Living out of a higher purpose is much more easily said than done in a culture focused on the individual, where success is measured by personal gain and immediate gratification. Higher purpose isn’t about you. That’s what’s causing the dissonance.

When you embody a higher purpose, you more spaciously navigate the complexities and disturbances of life. It keeps you focused and your head in the game. You’re not distracted by the “crowd noise.”

Your teammates on the field are people you didn’t think you could be a part of, but now, here you are. You feel like you belong on this playing field.

You’ve earned your spot as a starter.

THE ELDER'S HIGHER PURPOSE

An Elder lives inside an astonishing inheritance. Elders have a consecrated heritage. The essence of Elder has been passed on through the millennia. Their eternal responsibility is, was and will be, to maintain the best of humanity in their communities.

Elders have appeared in history and cultures for as long as human societies have existed. The concept of Elder is deeply rooted into the structures of ancient communities and tribes, where age and experience but more importantly wisdom, were highly valued. That is an Elder’ liniage

And what generated their being and actions was the inherited higher purpose which was now fully their own. Elders appreciate and honor their ancestors. Their past is part of an Elder’s present.

An Elder’s speaking from their higher purpose resonates deeply in others, stirring something powerful within them that transcends the words.

Operating from their higher purpose, Elders are uplifted, not downtrodden.

Their higher purpose shapes who they are now. The influence of the past, and all their required identities needed for success, are consciously dismissed. Elders have become their own incarnation.

Elders experiencing a higher purpose gives them a transcendent sense of meaning. They now operate out of their greater humanity, without much concern for what others might think or say. They know, feel, and thrive when they become their higher purpose in being and action.

Standing in their higher purpose, Elders develop a toughness without meanness. When faced with adversity, they step back into their higher purpose because their goals are much more meaningful. A higher purpose keeps an Elder on purpose.

Elders operate free and clear from the “growing old” context, concepts and gossip embedded in our culture. How? Because a higher purpose is eternal in nature which is much more the framework which they inhabit.

Touching the eternal touches how you grow old.

So, the purpose of a higher purpose for Elders is strength, equanimity, and freedom in every dimension of their lives. And engaging with people to be their highest self.

UNCOVERING YOUR HIGHER PURPOSE

A higher purpose is an “inside job.” Be still. Be awake. Your higher purpose is a whisper that can only be heard when you quiet your mind. It is described as an "inside job" because it cannot be directly taught or imparted through external sources.

It is essential to understand that your higher purpose is unique to you. Unbeknownst to you, was already assigned exclusively to you, and only you.

One of a kind. Your higher purpose was seeded at birth, or maybe before, but has not been accessible until now. Buddhists and Hindus call it Dharma. Jews, Tikkun Olam and Halakhah. Christians The Calling and Greatest Commandment.

Your higher purpose resides deep within, inherently part of your human essence. But multiple grimy layers of distraction, ego, fear, and societal conditioning have coated and wrapped it up tight.

So, Stage I is “unwrapping.”

You get to that place where you finally realize whatever you’ve been doing, whoever you’ve been being, especially in these uncertain and chaotic times, is collapsing in on you. It’s taking away your sense of freedom and creativity.

When this condition is acknowledged, this is the opening to uncover your higher purpose, your path to freedom.

But you can quiet the mind and turn inward to access this more profound purpose. It requires stillness, reflection, and a willingness to shed the surface-level noise of daily life.

Higher purpose emerges when you can hear that inner voice. Quakers call it the "little voice within," and the Hindus call it the Atman, a quiet yet profound guide that speaks to your higher consciousness and touches your undeniable truth, your bedrock integrity, and your deepest intention all at once. Elders have figured out to hear that voice and keep it speaking. It’s a psychic app they press frequently.

For Elders, this "little voice" is their central compass, steering their decisions and actions with a sense of duty to the greater good, recognizing the interconnectedness of all and the importance of living for something larger than themselves.

You don’t need to formulate, create, generate, or devise your higher purpose; you need to find it because it intrinsically exists. Already. Always. It’s your cosmic blueprint, the unique design of your being, waiting to be uncovered and lived.

VIDEO

How does a higher purpose influence life as lived? Watch this video. You will directly experience the influence of a higher purpose in life and imagine it in your own life.

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The Destructive Power of Uncertainty and Chaos

Tue, 11 Mar 2025 20:39:06 GMT

The Destructive Power of Uncertainty and Chaos

An Elder’s higher purpose is to heal the world. To "heal" means restoring something to a state of health or well-being, whether physical, emotional, or psychological. Healing also refers to recovering from an injury or illness, but it can also describe emotional recovery from trauma, pain, or distress.

According to these definitions and the current conditions in our country, we need “healers.” The elders' principal deliverable is healing.

But to heal, what needs to be known is what is causing the damage.

Today, the diagnosis is obvious. The trauma from uncertainty and chaos is causing damage.

Uncertainty and chaos profoundly influence physical health and mental well-being. They spread insidiously through every aspect of life, causing instability and unease.

Chaos and uncertainty stress you out, triggering a series of bodily reactions that affect your overall well-being. When you're stressed, your cortisol levels shoot up, affecting your immune system, heart health, and sleep.

Our bodies handle short-term issues well but struggle with prolonged uncertainty, increasing sickness, and slowing recovery.

Chronic uncertainty and chaos enhance cytokine production and transit, which increases inflammation throughout the body. Chronic diseases get worse, and mortality increases.

Uncertainty and chaos also ramp up anxiety and make you feel helpless. Our brains like things to be predictable and under control. When they're not, we get stuck thinking about all the worst things that could happen.

Aren’t you doing that right now?

Mental unrest clouds judgment and impairs decision-making and problem-solving abilities. Over time, the distress gradually erodes self-esteem and resilience, making coping with challenges even harder.

Exposure to chaotic and uncertain environments exacerbates conditions like depression and anxiety, perpetuating cycles of emotional distress.

Hey, realize we’re all going through it.

Moreover, uncertainty's damaging effects extend beyond the individual, permeating interpersonal relationships and societal dynamics. It drives us further apart.

Our country is now gripped by uncertainty and chaos, with diminishing trust in institutions and each other. Communication is breaking down, and collective efforts toward improvement are flailing. It feels like we’re going downward, not upward. The rabbit hole we fell into is getting deeper and darker.

Economic instability, geopolitical tensions, and environmental crises amplify the prevalent sense of unpredictability, compounding the toll on our collective well-being.

Chaos and uncertainty are kicking the sh*t out of us.

This is precisely why Elders are needed ASAP.

THE ELDER'S WISDOM ON NAVIGATING UNCERTAINTY

Elders show you how to deal with uncertainty by shifting your fundamental thinking. They enable you to adopt approaches that significantly reduce the adverse effects of uncertainty.

Elders teach resilience, the key to handling life's many twists and turns. Resilience isn’t about avoiding challenges but understanding them in a new way that makes you more substantial than the circumstances.

The circumstances don’t disappear, but Elders open the gates to higher wisdom. Looking through your wisdom lenses, you experience uncertainty’s form and mass much differently, far less toxic, much more benign.

Looking through wisdom lenses, you are on the shore watching the rapids, not immersed in the whitewater, being powerfully pulled toward the approaching waterfall.

Elders facilitate practices like mindfulness, rethinking thoughts, and seeing the bigger picture to help you stay emotionally balanced. They also model this emotional balance, so you know it isn’t smoke and mirrors.

Elders have fully embodied the principle of impermanence, so they remind you, “This too shall pass.” Hence, they have a calming presence and can create a condition of equanimity and composure.

Elders remind you that a strong support network is vital. Having friends, family, or community groups around you offers an emotional sense of connection. Connecting with others reduces fear and trepidation. Feeling connected promotes a sense of safety and fosters resilience.

Elders know that having a higher purpose, living into that higher purpose, and shaping yourself to deliver on that higher purpose is the best vaccine for uncertainty and chaos.

Wake up! Our current politics is purposefully designed to maximize uncertainty and chaos. Our rapid reaction makes us more susceptible to manipulation and control and prevents us from focusing on long-term solutions or collective well-being. It keeps the survival mechanism churning. It keeps splitting us further apart.

The Elders' role is now crucial because they embody and transfer stability, patience, and long-term strategic thinking needed to move beyond the chaos and uncertainty.

Forget Red Bull; it’s Elders that give you wings.

JUST THINKING - THE POSSIBILITY OF AN ELDER COALITION

There are nearly 60 million of us over 65. The aggregate wealth of Americans over 65 is vastly more significant than the combined wealth of tech billionaires like Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos, and others.

While the net worth of individuals over 65 is more difficult to calculate as a single figure, it is estimated to be $28 trillion, based on various averages

and estimates. In contrast, the combined wealth of Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos, and other top billionaires like Mark Zuckerberg and Larry Ellison is roughly $1 trillion.

This makes the wealth of Americans over 65 about 200 times greater than the combined wealth of these tech moguls. Compared to the entire U.S. economy, which is valued at around $26.7 trillion, older Americans' wealth is comparable to the nation's total GDP, emphasizing the immense wealth accumulated by this demographic.

Using the 80/20 rule, the Contemporary Elder Institute estimates that 20% of the 60 million Americans over 65 (about 12 million people) hold much of the wealth in this demographic. With the total wealth of Americans over 65 estimated at around $28 trillion, the wealth of this top 20% comes to approximately $22.4 trillion. The combined wealth of tech billionaires and others is around $1 trillion.

This means the wealth of just 12 million older Americans is about 22 times greater than the combined wealth of the tech moguls. This stark contrast highlights the concentration of wealth among older generations and their immense financial power compared to the tech elite. We don’t realize it, but we’re the “badass.”

Many of you are among the top 20% of individuals over 65, and as readers of this post, you understand this: We can shape the future and rise above constant uncertainty and chaos. The power is not in their hands but in ours.

COMMENTS REQUESTED

Please give your thoughts and comments below: Given our numbers, our depth of knowledge-based experience and talent, our core values, and our understanding of our humanity, “How would you design an Elder Coalition that you would join?”

What's Going On?

Thu, 27 Feb 2025 19:21:38 GMT

SELF-ACKNOWLEDGEMENT

I do a process at some engagements. I ask participants, “Tell the group what you want to be acknowledged for?” We begin the process with dyad sharing. Two chairs facing each other. But even in that safety zone, people stumble or resist telling the other person what they really want to be acknowledged for. And whatever they say that first round “ain’t it.”

But this is true for me as well. “Why are people embarrassed to ask for acknowledgment?” And even when they get it from others, they sometimes don’t believe it anyway.

When I self-examine, I find that I am embarrassed to ask for acknowledgment because it makes me feel vulnerable. It brings up a fear that I might appear needy, insecure, or egotistical.

Then there is our culture, which has an unspoken expectation that recognition should be given freely rather than requested—otherwise, it feels less genuine and inauthentic.

Additionally, some people internalize the belief that their worth should be self-evident or that seeking acknowledgment diminishes the value of their accomplishments. I’m one of them.

There’s also the risk of rejection; it feels like an invalidation if I ask for acknowledgment and don’t receive it.

At its core, my reluctance to ask for acknowledgment is often about protecting myself from potential feelings of shame, inadequacy, or dependency.

But as an Elder, I have learned and practiced that those thoughts and feelings are not real either. They come and go. They are my thoughts of the moment that don’t have much staying power.

An Elder’s discipline is to step into the fire, not away from it.

So, I want to be acknowledged for having brought Contemporary Elder into existence, whereby it is known as genuine and recognized contributing value to growing old.

I’m proud that, at age 80, I have launched an expression into the universe that has come into recognized existence, an enterprise that is making a difference. Transitioning people from Older to Elder is ”good” work, which allows me to express myself fully and speak, write and teach, and, therefore, be an Elder.

“Be the change you wish to see in the world.” - Gandhi

SUBSTACK

Substack is a big deal for me, and I’ll need your support. It works best by subscription, so we will ask you to subscribe when it launches. Subscribing will directly help us achieve its mission—Elder Wisdom: Growing Old as an Elder.

Substack invites reader commentary, which is critical for next evolutionary step of generating an online community. On my risk side, highly regarded writers, poets, and pundits have migrated to Substack. For me, the vulnerability is that you are read by these peers, not a select audience of your choosing.

Thank you for empowering me to take this larger risk.

---------------

At the institute, we always explore the most effective and efficient way for people to cross the chasm from Older to Elder. Here is an email to participants in our current offering.

To: Participants in the Emancipation Transformation Program

Cc: My Readership

Re: A Parable of Phase I of 3 of the Program

Purpose: You Are the Parable

The Awakening of Elias

Elias, a somewhat somber older man with grey hair and weary eyes, sat alone on his porch, watching the evening sky burn with the colors of the setting sun.

For years, his mind had been his master—filling his days with regrets of the past and anxieties about the future. He was trapped in an ever-ending loop of thoughts, a prisoner of his own mind.

One day, while tending to his small garden, he noticed a bird resting on a branch. The bird sat still, unbothered, watching the world with quiet presence.

Elias envied its peace. “If only my mind would rest like that,” he muttered.

At that moment, a thought arose: Who is noticing this?

He paused, hands covered in soil. Was it his mind speaking, or was it something deeper?

He realized that he could observe his thoughts, much like he observed the bird.

And if he could observe them, then surely, he was not them.

A quiet stillness settled over him. He looked around—the wind moving the leaves, the earth's warmth beneath his fingers, the gentle rhythm of his breath.

For the first time, he felt the vastness of awareness itself. His thoughts, once oppressive, were now like passing clouds in the sky of his consciousness.

Elias smiled, a deep, knowing smile. He was not his regrets, his fears, or the endless chatter of his mind. He was the one who saw them.

From that day forward, he walked not as an old man burdened by thought but as an Elder—rooted in presence, free in his awareness.

His mind was still there thinking thoughts, but now, he was the master, not the captive.

------

NEXT YEAR – A WHALE OF A PROGRAM

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ARE YOU YOUR THOUGHTS?

Thu, 20 Feb 2025 18:13:18 GMT

ARE YOU YOUR THOUGHTS?

The body content of your post goes here. To edit this text, click on it and delete this default text and start typing your own or paste your own from a different source.

THE QUESTION OF PERSONAL BRANDS

Wed, 12 Feb 2025 14:42:07 GMT

THE QUESTION OF PERSONAL BRANDS

To: Everyone Spending Time, Money and Energy on Personal Branding

From: An Elder’s Viewpoint to Be Considered

PREAMBLE

If an Elder’s wisdom were present, much of what is now purely subjective would be forced to be made objective. This shift from subjective to objective would dissolve illusions and distortions.

This piece aims to achieve this purpose in the instance of “personal brand, " to move it from the subjective to the objective.

My accusation is that if you are heavily involved in generating a personal brand, you might consider you’re wasting your time, money, and other people’s time. Personal brands are an illusion that hinders growth and development.

A personal brand is the ego trying to win.

A personal brand keeps you stuck in your past.

A personal brand stifles your ability to transform yourself.

A personal brand is who you want to be, not who you really are. It requires self-deception.

Think about it. A personal brand is an oxymoron, a combination of contradictory or incongruous words such as cruel kindness.

Personal means "pertaining to or impacting you as a self.” Branding a self makes the self a thing.

A thing is an inanimate, material object distinct from a living sentient being. A thing is a fixed entity, unable to change; maybe it can modify itself, but not change into something else. A thing can never transform.

Through wisdom, an elder can transform a subjective idea into an objective reality. However, this process sometimes reveals that the supposed objective is pure fiction, as is the case with personal brands.

AN ELDERS’S WISDOM

Wisdom is one of the rewards for those who become elders. Wisdom is not just information culminating in knowledge shaped by experience. It does not exist on a transactional or linear plane of thinking and language. Wisdom is distinct.

For an Elder, knowledge is an instrument played in the orchestra, and wisdom is the conductor.

Wisdom is innate and must be uncovered. Knowledge is externally derived.

Wisdom is the essence. Knowledge is the meaning.

The Elder’s wisdom is not conventional wisdom. It’s higher wisdom.

Higher wisdom challenges conventional wisdom by questioning its assumptions and exposing its limitations. This creates friction because conventional wisdom tends to resist change. People rooted in conventional wisdom see higher wisdom as impractical or threatening.

An example of the dissonance between the two.

Conventional wisdom: "Aging means slowing down and becoming less relevant."

Higher wisdom: "Aging is a powerful stage of life where true purpose and clarity can emerge."

In this instance, higher wisdom challenges limiting beliefs, inviting you to see aging not as a decline but as a transformation platform.

Higher wisdom helps conventional wisdom grow beyond its current and cultural limits. Meditation and mindfulness were once seen as fringe or "spiritual nonsense" (conventional wisdom), but higher wisdom recognized their profound benefits. Today, they are part of mainstream health practices.

Conventional wisdom provides structure and stability, while higher wisdom offers deeper meaning and a broader perspective.

Contemporary elders live in a space where conventional wisdom meets higher wisdom. They’ve experienced the power and limitations of conventional wisdom. They are uniquely positioned to offer higher wisdom to those still immersed in what their personal brand tells them about who they are, really who they wish to be, which only reinforces what they are not.

PIERCING THE MYTH OF THE PERSONAL BRAND

A personal brand is the image and reputation that an individual intends to build around themselves. It's how they want the world to perceive them, and it requires that they present themselves in accordance with their brand.

Your personal brand supposedly expresses your values, expertise, skills, and personality traits that distinguish you from others. But there are parts of you that you feel you must hide and suppress from exposure.

Writers, podcasters, consultants, advisers, YouTubers, and TEDXers repeat the mantra, “Developing a strong personal brand defines what makes you unique.” Convincing you that your personal brand will powerfully communicate your actions, online presence, and interactions to shape how others perceive you.

Social media depends on the personal brand being critical. That’s what gets the clicks and the money.

However, as an elder, I ask you to consider that the concept of personal brand may well be a fabrication, a construct of human imagination designed to package one's perception of oneself and sell it as reality. It’s your “wanna be” self not your whole self.

Personal brands don’t exist in nature, and their power comes not from truth but from shaping yourself to cause a collective agreement to believe your brand is really you. Your brand now incarcerates you. You must contort yourself constantly to be brand-appropriate.

The time and money you’ve invested in your personal brand, those nuanced emails and posts, blogs, podcasts, Websites, and social media strategies, don’t leave any room for you to be other than how your brand defines you.

The final strike of the wisdom spear is to check and see if your personal brand isn’t a real distraction. This shiny veneer keeps you tethered to the illusion of influence while stifling your ability to adapt, innovate, and create something beyond your current identity and past.

I support Shakespeare’s Macbeth’s statement about personal brand: “ It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing."

WHAT IF?

What if personal brands, by their nature, are boxes? Boxes that define, delineate, and constrain what’s inside. Once you’ve established your personal brand, you are a slave to it.

With a personal brand, you set expectations for your relationships and must continuously meet or exceed them.

As a human being, you are many things besides what you portray in a personal brand. Your personal brand eliminates the importance of these other factors.

But maybe these factors make life more equanimous, joyful, and understandable, with more profound compassion for self and others. Maybe your personal brand shuts off the valve to your higher purpose.

The Prison of the Personal Brand

I built these walls with crafted care,
A polished mask for me to wear.
Each word, each move—a careful show,
A shining self the world must know.

I guard my image, day and night,
A slave to shadows, framed in light.
Freedom fades beneath the role,
Chains of image steal my soul.

What’s the cost? Too high to tell—
A life confined inside this shell.
To break it down would set me free,
Yet who am I, if not what they see?

ANNOUNCEMENTS – A REVIEW BY CHATGPT

A Recent Email Communication

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Marc,

As a nationally syndicated podcast host, I must prepare before every broadcast. Besides a “meet and greet,” I visit the guests' websites, blogs, and podcasts and watch some videos on their YouTube channels. But now I also use ChatGPT.

Given that our conversation will open with your book as the lead, I asked the following question of ChatGPT.

“There is a self-published book by Dr. Marc B Cooper called Older to Elder. Are you aware of it? If so, please summarize it into its central concepts.”

Here was ChatGPT’s response…

Older to Elder by Dr. Marc B Cooper is a self-reflection and transformation guide aimed at helping people move from simply “getting older” to embracing the role of an elder—someone who contributes wisdom, presence, and meaning to their community.

Core Themes from Older to Elder

1. Aging as a Rite of Passage – Moving beyond society’s view of aging as decline and embracing it as an initiation into a new role.

2. From Accumulation to Contribution – Shifting from focusing on career, achievement, and personal success to a stage of giving back and mentorship.

3. Deep Reflection & Inner Work – Examining one’s beliefs, unfinished business, and emotional patterns to step into elderhood with clarity.

4. Living with Purpose & Presence – Cultivating wisdom, patience, and a deeper connection to life’s mysteries rather than just passing time.

5. Building Community & Legacy – Elders don’t just reflect; they serve, support, and inspire the next generation.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

My Response to her email:

L.C.,

AI got it right.

These were my intentions in writing the book. If ChatGPT said so, I feel validated as an author. When the entire internet says so, that’s pretty cool.

I am eagerly anticipating our interview and am grateful for this opportunity.

Marc

PREP FOR PODCASTERS AND RADIO PRODUCERS

Mon, 27 Jan 2025 14:17:25 GMT

PREP FOR PODCASTERS AND RADIO PRODUCERS

Older vs. Elder

Over the past few years, I’ve focused on being an effective guest on podcasts and national radio broadcasts. With each one, I've learned more about improving my speaking, listening, and presence and setting up the conversation to realize my intention. I’ve learned pace when commercial breaks determine time.

I’ve done enough of these now to set up a structure for fulfillment that better delivers results for myself and the host, makes it easier for me to be self-expressed, and allows for a receptive “listening” about Elder. At the same time, the host gets a strong production and heightened audience engagement.

The intention was clear from the beginning – to make Older-to-Elder a living reality for those seeking a path other than just growing old.

Nearly every host has opened the broadcast with the same question after intros. I know I will get this question because I send this list below for them to consider before our interview.

“What is the difference between Older and Elder?”

Any line can be used by the host to develop their questions.

Older is preservation – Elder is transformation
Older is loss – Elder is gain
Older is unavoidable – Elder is choice
Older is taking away – Elder is imbuing
Older is contracting – Elder is expanding
Older is isolation – Elder is affinity
Older is the end – Elder is a beginning
Older is resignation – Elder is possibility
Older is hopelessness – Elder is hopeful
Older has default futures – Elder has created futures
Older is unable to be here now – Elder can reside in the now
Older is giving up – Elder is giving in
Older is life-taking – Elder is life-giving
Older is losing sight – Elder is gaining insight
Older is separation – Elder is connection
Older is indifference – Elder is making a difference
Older is resentment – Elder is contentment
Older is denial – Elder is acceptance
Older regrets – Elder appreciates
Older is afraid – Elder is courageous
Older is conventional wisdom – Elder is higher wisdom
Older has death be the enemy – Elder has death be an ally

THE DASH BETWEEN OLDER TO ELDER

The dash (-) on every line between Older to Elder is part of the path to becoming an elder.

Dr. Marc Cooper

An Elder for Our Times

The Contemporary Elder Institute

www.requestingwisdom.com

www.drmarcbcooper.com

ANNOUNCEMENTS

Left or right, liberal or MAGA, progressive or conservative, does the situation have you, or do you have it?

Two Spaces Remaining. Register HERE .

“Dr. Marc Cooper will be a guest on our highly regarded national podcast on multiple platforms next week. “The Not Old Better Show” is part of the SMITHSONIAN ASSOCIATES Interview Series podcast, the Proud Podcast of Prevention Magazine, and the Healthy Living Interview Series.”

We’ll let you know when and where it is posted.

Thank you for your readership, which fuels the mission of Older to Elder.

THE ELDERS CLARION CALL

Thu, 16 Jan 2025 13:47:55 GMT

THE ELDERS CLARION CALL 

The Elders' Role in Altering a Troubling Future

** DO NOT PASS GO – WATCH THIS VIDEO FIRST **

https://www.facebook.com/reel/1528235604524517

The future described in the video—is a world where those who control the machines concentrate wealth and power, causing greater poverty and despair. The video paints a grim picture of increasing inequality and suffering.

That future is here now—yes, right now—in your nation, in your neighborhood, in your house, on your screens, all around you.

The trajectory of this future is unsustainable and deeply destructive to humanity. If this future is fulfilled, the depth of suffering will continue to accelerate and expand.

An Elder's higher calling is to relieve suffering, which has been the Elder’s calling for millennia. This calling is rooted in their capacity for higher wisdom, compassion, and perspective. Having lived through life's joys and trials, Elders understand the human condition, which transcends superficial judgments.

Elders, who have traversed the seasons of life, know suffering intimately. They’ve each experienced personal loss, failure, physical decline, and the challenges of navigating an ever-changing world. Elders have lived through the trials that define human experience. That is what allows elders to be genuinely empathetic.

Empathy is a mental, sensory, and emotional connection, a shared experiential bridge, and a capacity to “recreate” another person's feelings and spirit. You not only understand intellectually but also experience what they are experiencing. The expression “I feel you” gets close. That’s empathy, and it fosters a deep sense of connection and understanding.

This empathic connection enables elders to see suffering not as a sign of failure or frailty but as a shared universal experience that calls them to draw their "healing" and "repair" swords from their scabbards.

Elders possess the serenity to sit with another’s suffering without being emotionally overwhelmed and the insight to offer wisdom rooted in their experience. An elder’s presence brings calm; their words recontextualize the suffering so it loosens its tight grip.

Ultimately, the calling to relieve suffering expresses elderhood's highest purpose: to be a source of wisdom and peace and actively contribute to the world's well-being.

Elders know what they signed up for when they purposefully moved from Older to Elder. Healing yourself and the world was a mandatory part of their core curriculum to get their Elder degree.

THE WAY IT IS

In today’s culture, Elders are seen as Olders. Thus, they are relegated to the margins, with no speaking parts in society’s narrative. Their wisdom, earned through decades of lived experience, goes uncalled upon, overshadowed by the audience’s obsession with novelty and its insatiable appetite for speed.

Preference for what is new, sexy, and fast eclipses the depth and substance that Elders bring—a depth rooted in reflection, patience, and a lifetime of lessons learned. But being new, sexy, and fast is only making things worse. The door is opening for Elders.

A new narrative is being written, a new storyboard is being developed, and it demands attention. It is about Elders stepping forward to reclaim their rightful place as stewards of humanity's progress and caretakers of its spirit.

As this new narrative unfolds, Elders will not be seen as relics of the past but as needed participants in shaping the future. Their lived experience and wisdom become a resource for insight, guidance, and healing in a world hungry for meaning and direction.

Elders are coming to the writers' meetings and writing themselves back into the script—not as background characters or momentary walk-ons but as protagonists in a more compassionate and enlightened world narrative. The screen is ready, the audience is seeking and vast, and the role awaits.

THE CALL

To achieve their status, Elders undertook personal transformation. They expanded specific characteristics and qualities and disregarded others. They cultivated the courage to stand apart from the noise of contemporary culture and embody the qualities that define a true Elder: serenity in the face of chaos, purpose amid aimlessness, wisdom that transcends short-term thinking, and figured out that “enough” is actually enough.

As stewards of wisdom and experience, elders are in tune with the cycles of destruction and renewal. They understand the consequences of unchecked greed and imbalance, having witnessed the rise and fall of systems throughout their lives.

To be seen as an Elder, they present themselves in ways that command respect and recognition. This is not about seeking validation but embodying a presence so grounded and authentic that it draws others toward them.

To be appreciated, elders' lives must be examples of balancing wisdom with humility and action with reflection. For me, that is the benefit of being an Elder.

To be heard as Elders: In a world overflowing with information, now without fact-checking, their voices must rise above the clamor, shouting, and screen-screeching.

To be heard, Elders must master the art of authentic sharing, weaving their wisdom into resonating narratives. Sharing that strikes the interior “emotional tuning forks” of listeners.

Speaking as an elder is not simply about communicating opinions—it is about offering insights that arise from deep reflection and lived experience. It is speaking with influence that comes not from power but from deeper understanding through wisdom.

Elders' tasks are not easy. They require resilience to confront a culture that dismisses them, creativity to find new ways to engage younger generations who view them as obsolete, and a profound sense of responsibility to act as stewards for a future they may not live to see.

Though foreboding, the future projected in this video is not inevitable. Rooted in a deep sense of purpose, elders can step forward to alter this future, which is already proceeding and picking up speed.

The next step is to coalesce twenty percent of the 53 million people over 65 in the U.S. into authentic elders, 106 million. This number breaches the tipping point. Elders will have the strength and wisdom to intervene with power to change the inevitability of this future.

It’s Not a Done Deal, But I’ll Take Your Bets.

I believe I have the numbers to back up my closing request.

According to current data, there are 53 million people aged 65 and older in our country today. This is the fastest-growing demographic in the United States. By the end of this decade, the 65-and-over population is projected to reach 73 million, accounting for over 20% of the total population and representing a significant segment of society.

This is when the “listening” will open, when the door opens for the Elders to sit at the table.

Today, those 65 and over possess an aggregated net worth of $19,022,760,000,000, or approximately $19.02 trillion. Elon Musk’s sits at $415.8 billion. The percent difference between $19.02 trillion and $415.8 billion is approximately 4474.31%, meaning $19.02 trillion is over 44 times greater than $415.8 billion. So, the numbers are there. We dwarf Amazon, Facebook, and the U.S. economy.

Moving elders to the place of influence has many boulders to be moved. But the world I encounter is miserable, scared, and anxious about their future. The world is shaking with fires, weather disasters, killings, untrustworthy governments, and uncertain futures. The time is right for Elders to be Elders in the world.

Hillel the Elder, a Jewish scholar from the 1st century, retorted, “If not you, then who? If not now, when?” The answer was evident when I asked Hillel’s question of myself and now my fellow Elders. It is our time.

ANNOUNCEMENTS

Catch Marc on Answers for Elders as he discusses the difference between "Older" and "Elder" with Suzanna Newman. Tune in Sunday at 3 PM PST on Portland's AM 860 The Answer (KPAM), on one of the channels listed below, or watch for the recorded podcast on their YouTube or Website .

Tolerating the Intolerable: How Elders Handle It

Tue, 10 Dec 2024 19:50:48 GMT

Tolerating the Intolerable: How Elders Handle It

Viktor Frankl was one of my foundation stones for critical thinking and understanding how to live my life. His message was loud and clear: how you choose to relate to the world is up to you.

You are always the responsible agent, period. No one and nothing is “doing it to you.”

Viktor Frankl coined the term tragic optimism to describe the ability to maintain hope and find meaning in life despite its inevitable suffering, pain, and tragedies.

As a Holocaust survivor, Frankl had the deepest, most genuine, and direct experience of suffering, pain, and tragedy. He had the right to speak.

In today's world, both in the U.S. and globally, Frankl's work stands as the best example for modern elders to follow and live by.

Contemporary elders learn to embody Frankl’s wisdom of tragic optimism, which allows them to stay centered and practice tolerating the intolerable.

By reflecting on Frankl’s teachings, elders relate to the intolerable differently than most. They see it as contributory, not destructive.

Elders learn about intolerance early in their passage and experience it firsthand in a culture that sees being an elder as simply "older."

Elders, seen as merely older, are often excluded, isolated, and unappreciated. They face a culture that equates age with obsolescence, uselessness, and worthlessness.

Despite their potential to guide, heal, and inspire, elders encounter systemic ageism, exclusion from decision-making, and disregard for their contributions.

How can we, as elders, shift from being seen as burdens and intolerable to being valued and genuinely included?

It’s Our Time

My fellow elders and I have silently endured this marginalization, embodying patience born of our understanding. But we now realize that tolerating being seen as intolerable has come at a cost—it further entrenched the systems that desperately needed repair.

Our disengagement also enabled self-centered, ego-driven, greed-driven, and power-driven leadership. It wasn’t top-down; it was top-only.

But for many in our nation, the pain has grown so deep, the suffering so intense, and the anxiety so overwhelming that the door to elder wisdom is beginning to open.

As contemporary elders, we recognize and have begun to challenge this intolerable dynamic of being disregarded, unwelcome, and seen as useless.

As elders, we know the only way to meet this challenge is to be heard. Wisdom has no power if ignored.

We elders are here to break through the barriers of prejudice and ignorance. It’s an arduous climb in a culture obsessed with youth, fearful of death, and driven by the belief that “more is better.”

Yet, as we observe our communities, our nation, and our world heading toward greater pain and suffering, our call to duty is loud and clear.

How can we elders make our voices heard and our presence felt in a world consumed by division, distrust, anxiety, and a rush to anger and conflict? Elders embody the opposite—unity, trust, equality, and peace.

Now, more than ever, it’s clear the world desperately needs the wisdom and presence of genuine elders.

What We Elders Are Doing About It

Elders have learned to tolerate the intolerable, drawing on a lifetime of experience that has taught them resilience, patience, and perspective.

They understand that turmoil is transient, having weathered enough storms to know even the darkest clouds eventually part. Impermanence is woven into how elders think and live.

Elders lean into their higher wisdom, using reflection and discernment to separate what truly matters from what doesn’t. They continue to pursue higher wisdom, realizing this mountain has no top—a hallmark of elderhood.

This higher wisdom transcends ordinary knowledge, rooted in spiritual, ethical, and universal truths. It provides clarity, purpose, and the ability to see beyond appearances or biases, helping elders grasp the bigger picture, navigate complexity, and align actions for the greater good.

As elders, we are responsible for choosing how we “be” in life, independent of circumstances—a truth Viktor Frankl captured brilliantly. We focus on what we can influence rather than being consumed by what we cannot.

Humor, gratitude, and community are essential tools. Self-reflection, contemplation, meditation, and inquiry are the inner tools that construct connections and perspectives, lightening life’s burdens.

In a noisy world, an elder’s presence encourages reflection, healing, and a collective commitment to what truly matters: building a future grounded in wisdom, compassion, and shared humanity. Curiosity kills cats but enlivens elders.

Our work as elders now is to become people worth listening to—seen as valuable, wise, and capable of adding direct value. We need to make clear what an elder provides.

An authentic elder at the table has the power to change the context, the condition, and the people at the table—and that change can transform the world.

Closing Message

Viktor Frankl’s Man’s Search for Meaning profoundly influenced me. His teachings reiterate that meaning and responsibility are the foundation of human freedom.

I took to heart his book, first published in 1946, and intuitively recognized that his principles were the bedrock for my own search for meaning and freedom.

What Dr. Frankl says about meaning and responsibility are also the anchor principles for our upcoming program:
“Who Do I Need to Be? How Do I Need to Listen? What Can I Do to Repair the World?” beginning in January 2025.

Here is the best video of Viktor Frankl I have found. It has Spanish subtitles, but the conversation is in English:

As Frankl repeatedly states in the video, having meaning and purpose in your life is core. Indeed, it is the foundation for tolerating the intolerable and being free of its influence.

What gives your life meaning? What is your higher purpose?

A Request

Help me make the possibility of elderhood real in the world by forwarding this post to someone who is old enough and ready to consider transitioning from older to elder.

WISDOM FOR THE CURRENT MOMENT

Thu, 07 Nov 2024 14:05:16 GMT

WISDOM FOR THE CURRENT MOMENT

n moments like this, when hopelessness, grief from loss, values crushed, and the oxygen supply for possibility now gone, where do you go?

Given that I am an elder, it does me no good to perpetuate the shock.

Nor can I pretend it will be OK. It won’t be.

Nothing is permanent; everything changes. Rome, Greece, gone. Nothing lasts.

This is not a new feeling, but it goes beyond the personal this time. It’s gone universal. Everyone is reacting.

Recognizing your suffering is one thing, but seeing the staggering suffering it will cause for so many is another is also real.

The solemn job of an elder is to do what you can do to relieve suffering.

Heartlessness, indifference, selfishness, and irresponsibility are now the cornerstones of the pending future.

For an elder, the question isn’t “What should I do in this moment?” No, an elder knows to ask, “Who should I be?” now.

As an elder, I also know to look inward to answer that question. But my practice is that I need to step outside to look inside.

One practice for me to look outside in is to sit down with my teachers.

Thich Nhat Hanh

“When another person makes you suffer, it is because he suffers deeply within himself, and his suffering is spilling over. He does not need punishment; he needs help. That’s the message he is sending. If you can listen and understand your own suffering, then you can relieve the suffering in others.”

Pema Chödrön

"If we learn to open our hearts, anyone, including the people who drive us crazy, can be our teacher. The truth you find in your own pain, anger, and resentment becomes the compassion you extend to others. By staying open to discomfort rather than running from it, you find clarity, a deeper understanding of suffering, and the strength to transform it."

Dalai Lama

"If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion. Compassion is a sense of concern that draws you to help those who are suffering. You experience a sense of serenity and inner strength when you have genuine compassion."

Eckhart Tolle

“The primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but your thoughts about it. You can alleviate suffering by recognizing this truth and finding stillness beneath it. When you no longer resist the pain of the moment but observe it, you see it transform. In the awareness, you uncover peace.”

Ram Dass

“Suffering is part of our training program for becoming wise. Suffering is a powerful teacher that helps cultivate wisdom by forcing us to confront life’s deeper truths. Through suffering, we gain insights that are otherwise difficult to access.

“The shadow in our lives is there for us to embrace. Suffering is grace. Suffering opens us up spiritually. Suffering shifts from something to avoid to something that can awaken us to a greater sense of compassion and connection.”

Werner Erhard

“Suffering is caused by our interpretations of reality, rather than reality itself. Once you see that you are the source of your suffering, you are free to let it go.”

“Suffering holds value as an opportunity to transform one’s relationship to life, to question one’s interpretations, and to access new ways of being. When we stop resisting and simply accept what is, without attaching meaning that induces suffering, we gain clarity, freedom, and access to our true potential.”

Rainer Maria Rilke

“How we squander our hours of pain”

How we squander our hours of pain.

How we gaze beyond them into the bitter duration to see if they have an end.

Though they are really seasons of us, our winter, enduring foliage, ponds, meadows, and deep forests, that live in us, that we lean on.

Not knowing how to suffer them gently, they grip us, forcefully, against ourselves.

For me, in this brief poem, Rilke captures how suffering is resisted, though it is an essential, transformative "season" within us, a part of our being that helps us grow. Rilke invites a gentle acceptance of pain, suggesting that suffering, like winter, has its wisdom and purpose.

Once again, my teachers have reminded me of the nature of suffering and that I am the chooser of my experience.

AN ELDER’S COACHING OF ELDERS

Tue, 05 Nov 2024 13:18:00 GMT

AN ELDER’S COACHING OF ELDERS

We elders have weathered numerous societal upheavals. We need to approach the current U.S. presidential election with a tempered perspective.

Political instability, economic recessions, and significant cultural shifts have shaped our lives and taught us the value of resilience and stability.

Instead of succumbing to fear or frustration, let’s focus on long-term principles and cultivate strength.

This focus on personal stability and community resilience positions elders as sources of wisdom and calm for younger generations navigating their first election.

And the cauldron of anxiety of everyone else, their agitation, fear, and worry, needs an elder’s touch.

We elders deal with the climate of uncertainty by leaning into practices that foster emotional and mental equilibrium, such as mindful reflection, spiritual practices, and staying informed without becoming overwhelmed. Do your practice. Others will want what you have.

By relying on inner resources honed over decades, we can serve as guides, helping others interpret and contextualize the complexities of political news.

Our accumulated life experience enables us elders to advocate for a balanced viewpoint, reminding others of the nation’s resilience and the importance of measured responses.

For us elders, the challenges of election cycles reinforce our role as stabilizing forces, committed to contributing positively to the collective well-being, regardless of the political climate.

Elders, get out there and get to work. Today is the day you’re most needed.

ELDER AS A DISRUPTIVE TECHNOLOGY

Thu, 31 Oct 2024 14:25:07 GMT

ELDER AS A DISRUPTIVE TECHNOLOGY

A Prospectus for Investors & Stakeholders

To:

Angel Investors, Venture Capital, Private Equity Investors, Crowdfunding Investors, Institutional Investors, Corporate Investors, Sovereign Investors, Proven Entrepreneurs, State and Federal Government Officials, Business Organizations, and Nonprofits.

Cc:

Former senior executives, experienced business owners, seasoned, long-term healthcare providers, career academicians, tenured board directors, foundation officials, writers, and poets, and those who can thoughtfully consider Elder as a disruptive technology.

Stakeholders are anyone who is going to get old.

From:

Dr. Marc Cooper, DDS, MSD, CPC

The Contemporary Elder Institute

Founder, Teacher, Benefactor

Author of The Elder, SOURCE, Older to Elder

www.requestingwisdom.com – Enterprise Website

www.drmarcbcooper.com – Author Site Website

www.linkedin.com/in/drmarcbcooper/ - Social Media

Date: 10/31/2024

FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION

Disruptive technologies emerge when certain conditions align within a market or industry. These conditions set the stage for significant shifts, allowing new technologies to reshape established ways of doing things.

Essential conditions include unmet and underserved needs, high costs, demographic shifts, and changes in social behavior. All these conditions are rapidly intensifying as the late-aged population continues its rapid expansion.

“Elder” will thrive under these conditions.

What You Get Paid For

Imagine sitting in your enterprise's boardroom or C-suite, reflecting on fulfilling your highest and hardest accountability.

You are charged with foreseeing the next disruptive technology – and then getting your organization there before others – being a "first mover." Catching the wave before it soaks everybody else.

Your job is to recognize new disruptive technologies before they become mainstream. Recent examples include artificial intelligence (AI) and machine learning, 5G connectivity, blockchain and cryptocurrency, CRISPR and gene editing, and quantum computing.

Whatever your industry, you’ve had these kinds of disruptive shifts.

A disruptive technology is an innovation that significantly alters or replaces existing technologies, industries, or markets. Tesla, Amazon, and the iPhone changed everything and everyone, and they were powerful enough to decimate well-established century-old industrial mainstays - Kmart, Kohl’s, even 7-11 – going, going, gone.

Elder will have the same level of impact in the late-aged market.

Disruptive technology starts by addressing a niche market or a less demanding customer base but eventually grows to displace established products or services, transforming industries and changing the competitive landscape.

The Contemporary Elder Institute (CEI) has been delivering Older to Elder for years in a continuously improving forms and processes.

Many for-profit and nonprofit organizations have emerged in the late-aging industry in the last decade, and hundreds of entities have developed products and programs for the “longevity” market.

The multitude of entities and pundits now listed on Google pages about growing old, late aging, and Elders makes this perfectly apparent. Stakes are firmly in the ground.

The entire late-aging landscape and societal conditions are ripening for a breakthrough in the understanding and behavior of growing old as an Elder.

Perfect Timing

At first glance, "Elder" may not sound like a typical disruptive technology. It doesn't come with flashy gadgets, complex algorithms, or groundbreaking AI systems.

Like any significant disruptive force, Elder will cause a fundamental shift in societal values, leadership models, and approaches to problem-solving.

Today, in our country, growing old is seen as an intractable and expensive problem—a problem for both the person growing old and everyone and every institution involved.

What solutions exist for the 10,000 people a day turning 65 in our country, whose life span will predictably extend into their mid-80s and more and more into their 90s?

Of the approximately $4 trillion spent on healthcare in the United States annually, a substantial portion—around 36-40%—is attributed to older adults, those aged 65 and older. This means approximately $1.4 to $1.6 trillion annually goes toward healthcare for this age group.

By 2050, healthcare spending on the 65+ population could be around $3 to $4 trillion annually, potentially consuming up to half of the projected healthcare expenditures due to the growing demand, cost of care, and longer life expectancies.

Medicare, Medicaid, insurance companies, hospitals, providers, medical schools, the extraordinarily increased diagnostic skills with AI, and our society's attitudes about increasing funding by increasing taxes—come on now, we’ve got a problem, a costly problem.

And anyone reading this, your chances of growing old are solid. You hope to be one of those, but what will it look like when you get there?

Elders can effectively address the core late-aged problems. For the late aged, these problems fly various flags: anxiety, anguish, loneliness, depression, isolation, stress, and fear, but it's the same vessel, just raising different flags.

All these conditions exacerbate chronic disease onset and severity. Bellows to the embers of cytokine reactions and intensity.

With their wisdom, experience, and ability to guide future generations, Elders will be recognized as those who can make growing old better, healthier, and more productive.

Elders will directly influence the economic, health, and social drivers in late aging.

Consider the demographic trends: populations around the world are aging. In many countries, people over 65 are the fastest-growing demographic group, living longer and healthier lives. This is undoubtedly true in all first-world countries.

By 2030, in the U.S., people 65 and older will become 21% of the population. The growth is now exponential: From 53 million in 2024 to 60 million people in 2030, this population will cross the "tipping point" to become a powerful voice in the Major Majority.

By 2050, those over 65 will have greater than 50% of the country’s wealth, dwarfing Bezos, Musk, and Zuckerberg, along with the Federal and state governments combined. Fifty percent of the wealth is the 800-pound gorilla.

Just to make the point:

Summary Comparison (Approximate Projections for 2025)

Wealth of Americans 65+: $65–75 trillion
U.S. GDP: $28 trillion
Combined Value of Amazon, Meta, Microsoft, Google, and Apple: $10–11 trillion

Summary Comparison (Approximate Projections for 2050)

Wealth of Americans 65+: $200 trillion
U.S. GDP: $50–60 trillion
Combined Value of Amazon, Meta, Microsoft, Google, and Apple: $15–20 trillion

Tyranny of the apparent - $200 trillion vs $20 trillion.

I suggest you consider that Elder has the potential and the wealth to drive significant change, leading to groundbreaking innovation and growth in late aging and the country.

Imagine the political clout this group will have. They will become the most influential voting block in our country.

Elders will have the strongest influence of the trillion-dollar club. Elon will become low man on the Totem pole. There is a strong potential to become an Elder-driven economy.

By 2050, this population will make up 45%, at 90 million strong. There will be more people over 65 than aged 15 and under. This will be the Big Bang. At this pivot point, the context will shift.

The shift, moving from a knowledge-based society to a wisdom-based society. A fundamental transformation is possible worldwide.

The Business Value and ROI of Elders

Historically, Elders have been mistakenly categorized and treated as "Olders." They have been sidelined in modern society as technology and industry have shifted towards younger, faster-moving generations.

But in this marginalization lives the opportunity. Elders are poised, and some, like me, are in the early stages of creating a new niche, redefining the concept of aging and leadership in the 21st century.

Understand that Elders are the custodians of intergenerational wisdom, capable of mentoring and guiding businesses and institutions. A most perplexing problem for many organizations is generational difference that Elders can solve.

Elders can foster cross-generational partnerships, blending the innovative energy of youth with the tempered wisdom of experience. This would have an enormous impact on company cultures. If “culture is king,” what’s Elder worth?

Elders can address complex, long-term problems that younger leaders lack the foresight to tackle effectively. What is resolving long-term complex problems worth in your organization?

Businesses that cater to or incorporate Elders stand to gain access to an immense repository of wisdom. AI cannot provide wisdom because wisdom is not constrained to information and data-anchored algorithms.

The best AI can do is forecast trends and possible patterns, which ain’t wisdom. Wisdom lives outside the box. In fact, wisdom is the container that holds the box.

Elders have sharpened their wisdom, being able to see deeper into the past, further into the future, and more broadly in the present to be able to make “the right call.”

Moreover, the market for products, services, and systems designed for the late aged is poised to explode—from healthcare technologies to focused education, employment opportunities, and wellness solutions. Elders see the future before it happens.

Listen Up Healthcare

Elders understand that Buddha was right when he spoke his four noble truths. The first noble truth is that life is suffering. In our culture, growing old generates significant suffering: isolation, loneliness, marginalization, uselessness, disregard, worthlessness, and neglect.

Becoming an Elder deconstructs these elements of suffering. In doing so, one finds one's path to wisdom, which alters these underlying causes of suffering.

Becoming an Elder disrupts the cultural conversations about growing old. With their wisdom comes peace, freedom, equanimity, and resilience.

There's a growing body of evidence that mental health significantly impacts systemic (physical) health, influencing conditions such as cardiovascular disease, diabetes, immune function, and even cancer.

This body of evidence supports the view that mental health is not separate from but deeply intertwined with systemic health. Consequently, improving mental health has broad benefits for overall physical health.

One route is certainly individual therapy, but another is developing the late aged as Elders. Therapy isn’t scalable; it’s one on one. Training and developing Eiders is scalable.

In 2050, what will relieving the suffering of the late-aged be worth in a market of 90 million? And realize that AI will have pushed suffering way down the generational ladder by this time, giving Elder wisdom a much broader market.

The Social and Economic Impact of Elders

Elder is not just about personal wisdom; it's about societal influence. Imagine boardrooms, government agencies, and institutions influenced by those with decades of lived experience grounded in purpose and long-term thinking.

Elders can disrupt the short-term, profit-driven focus that dominates much of the corporate world by offering perspectives on sustainability, inclusivity, and resilience. Elders can move corporations from talking the talk to walking the walk.

Economically, elderhood holds untapped potential. Instead of relegating Elders to the sidelines of the workforce, forward-thinking companies will enlist them as advisors, coaches, and strategic thinkers.

Elders can and will transform business cultures and foster innovation that benefits from the Elder's long-term, macro-level perspective.

Summary

"Elder" is more than just a demographic or a stage of life; it's a transformative force. Elders, as both a concept and a societal role, represent the next disruptive technology, poised to reshape industries and markets and how we approach leadership.

Invitation for Consideration

After reading this post and watching this video, hearing and seeing how an Elder thinks, how an Elder is in life, and having an experience of an Eder, if you see Elder for your investment portfolio, and want to talk about, send me a quick note on LinkedIn. h ttps://www.linkedin.com/in/drmarcbcooper/

I don’t need an NDA for us to talk about Elder.

Experience Elder – A Video

The content above is informational and knowledge-based. However, knowledge without experience does not last, and if not anchored to experience, knowledge has a short shelf life.

Every week, I converse with people of various ages, countries, backgrounds, and institutions about what it means to be a Contemporary Elder.

Here is an excerpt from a conversation with an early middle-aged Parisian and myself, a Contemporary Elder.

ARTICLE REFERENCE:

Life Span, Health Span, and Humanity Span: A New Perspective on Aging

Thu, 24 Oct 2024 14:15:16 GMT

Life Span, Health Span, and Humanity Span: A New Perspective on Aging

[4 minute read]

PROCLAIMER:

A proclaimer is the positive counterpart to a disclaimer. While a disclaimer seeks to deny or limit responsibility, a proclaimer affirms confidentiality, responsibility, ownership, and purpose.

I am responsible for the distinction, Humanity Span. I genuinely believe it will make a profound difference in improving late aging.

SPAN DEFINED

As a noun, span refers to the full extent, reach, or duration of something. It describes a measurable distance, length of time, or range.

In all these cases, a span indicates a measurable stretch through time, space, and conceptual range.

Humanity Span fits these requirements. It occurs over time. It can be gauged. It demonstrates changes in how one ages, particularly late aging.

HUMANITY DEFINED

Humanity refers to the collective existence of all human beings and the qualities that define and connect us as a species.

Humanity encompasses the shared experiences, values, and conditions that bind us, such as compassion, empathy, intelligence, creativity, and the capacity for love and understanding (A)

Humanity also encompasses indifference, apathy, stupidity, hatred, and misunderstanding (B).

The Humanity Span goes from (B) to (A).

Humanity Span fits these requirements. It occurs over time. It can be gauged. It demonstrates changes in how one ages, particularly late aging.

WHY HUMANITY SPAN

In my time operating in the longevity industry, most focus on two key concepts: Life span and health span. While Life Span measures how long we live and Health Span measures how long we live in good health, another dimension I title the Humanity Span deserves equal attention. Maybe more attention.

I contend the depth and breadth in which you expand your humanity, what it really means to be human, the longer and healthier you will age.

Furthermore, the more enhanced the Humanity Span, the more able you will be to contribute to society, express creativity, and live with purpose, empathy, and connection.

The Humanity Span is that portion of your life that is not directly about being physically alive or medically healthy. It is about your emotional, intellectual, and spiritual health.

ELEMENTS OF THE HUMANITY SPAN

An essential part of the Humanity Span is understanding your collective characteristics, which you have in common with all other human beings.

People are people, and you're one of them.

As a human, you have all those inherent characteristics that exist in everyone: love, hate, jealousy, envy, suffering, grief, etc. They exist in all but manifest differently in each.

The better you recognize your humanness, the more you will be able to accept others. The more you accept your humanness, the more you will be able to forgive yourself, and the more you will be able to forgive others.

The Humanity Span is where you develop and grow your capacity for sympathy, compassion, wisdom, ethical living, and a connection to the larger human experience. This growth is not limited by age but can be maximized in late age.

Humanity Span is expanded by the time spent applying awareness, mindfulness, and consciousness to one's life as lived.

This heightened awareness goes beyond everyday thinking and behavior, delivering insights into the nature of reality, the self, and your existence.

EXPANDING YOUR HUMANITY SPAN

Increasing your Humanity Span is an intentional and active pursuit that requires wisdom, empathy, and conscious living. It requires deliberate effort to deepen your connection with yourself, others, and the wider human experience.

In our work, we use reflection, contemplation, meditation, Socratic inquiry, and learning from other members to extend, expand, and increase our Humanity Span.

Expanding your Humanity Span is one of the best ways to live with and inside greater meaning, purpose, fulfillment, and higher wisdom.

CONCLUSION

An isosceles triangle consists of two equal sides called "legs," a third unequal side called the "base," and a "vertex angle" formed by the two legs; the angles opposite the equal sides are called "base angles," which are always equal to each other.

It's simple: as the base expands, so do the legs to keep the angles consistent.

Creating a new distinction, something that didn't exist before, is exciting. It always begins like this: an idea that explains a new way to see something that has always been there. A concept that illuminates. A new way of understanding that clarifies.

For me, it clarified the mission of Contemporary Elders: to guide others, enable them to expand further and deeper in their humanity, and elevate their collective human experience.

So, as modern medicine and greater knowledge expand the Life Span and Health Span, it is best to consider how to expand the Humanity Span.

Question: Where do you need to extend your Humanity Span?

ANNOUNCEMENTS & ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

THE ELDER’S DEATHBED

Wed, 16 Oct 2024 19:00:03 GMT

THE ELDER’S DEATHBED

[An 8 minute Read with pictures]

Reading Shoshana Ungerleider's piece in a recent CNBC post, "Top 5 regrets people have on their deathbeds: What they can teach us about living healthy, fulfilled lives, from an internal medicine doctor," allowed me to contrast elder to older more competently.

Regret is a feeling of tension about a past choice, often accompanied by negative emotions such as remorse, sorrow, and helplessness. Regret commonly comes with an awareness of responsibility for wrongdoing or not doing so, causing guilt and shame.

I fully agree with Shoshana's observations about these five regrets and their impact. She reports, the top five regrets people have on their deathbeds are:

1. I didn't spend enough time with the people I love.

2. I worked too much and missed out on life.

3. I let fear control my decisions and didn't take risks.

4. I wish I'd been braver in the face of uncertainty or opportunity.

5. I focused too much on the future and lost touch with the present.

Elders of course grapple with these same regrets. These regrets are universal for late aging. You get old, you will have these regrets. But elders handle them differently.

GRATITUDE AS A PRACTICE

Wed, 09 Oct 2024 13:13:42 GMT

GRATITUDE AS A PRACTICE

"True happiness is to enjoy the present, without anxious dependence upon the future, not to amuse ourselves with either hopes or fears but to rest satisfied with what we have, which is sufficient, for he that is so wants nothing. The greatest blessings of mankind are within us and within our reach. A wise man is content with his lot, whatever it may be, without wishing for what he has not.

Seneca [Lucious Amnaeus Seneca; ca 4 BC – 65 AD, Roman Stoic Philospher]

MEANINGS IN THE TITLE
Gratitude is the quality or feeling of being thankful and appreciative of the kindness or benefits received. Gratitude involves recognizing and acknowledging the positive aspects of life, people, and experiences.

Positive means the presence or possession of features or qualities rather than their absence: health, peace, wisdom, prosperity, love, and happiness.

Practice involves consistent effort, repetition, and focus over time to achieve a desired goal or improvement in a particular area, whether physical, mental, emotional, or spiritual. In my experience, the practice of gratitude impacts all of these elements.

Practice is crucial for areas of weakness.

Practice builds skill, confidence, and mastery through repetition and refinement. When you are weak in something, your brain and body don't have the knowledge, muscle strength, or neural pathways needed to perform effectively.

Until I became an elder, gratitude hadn't been understood as a principal catalyst for well-being, equanimity, self-understanding, and contentment. Now I know.

MY PRACTICE OF GRATITUDE
For me, beginning a practice is best done daily. Adding something I hadn't done before takes time and effort. To do something unnatural for me, to practice something unfamiliar, I need structures to keep my attention and intention on doing the practice.

Reminders, prompts that can't be overlooked or ignored. Sticky notes on the computer. A scorecard of some kind.

PRACTICE GRADITUDE in caps at the top of each day's schedule on my Google calendar.

Part of my reluctance was my gratitude practice surfaced thoughts and feelings that blocked gratitude's occurrence. These thoughts never go away. Transforming how I related to these thoughts and feelings allowed gratitude to occur.

WHAT I DIDN'T HAVE
Identifying those thoughts and feelings that were weak or vacant and needed for gratitude became evident when I spent time with authentic elders.

Elders were genuinely grateful for their lives and life itself. They spoke and listened with generosity and appreciativeness. They lived with and inside thankfulness. They easily laughed about themselves and with others.

The gratitude embodied by elders supplied qualities and abilities I wanted: grace, gratefulness, honor, indebtedness, and thankfulness.

Being with elders made it painfully obvious what was blocking and tackling gratitude. Since generating insights and revelations is a function of contrast. I needed the "other," I needed elders, to see what was missing for me to be grateful.

TAKEAWAYS
Here's what I took away when I was with elders. They exhibited:

Emotional Well-being: They were happy, joyful, and contented.

Relationships: They appreciated people. Seemed that judgment or being 'right' didn't cloud relationships. Empathy, love, understanding, respect, and humor were strongly present.

Spiritual Growth: In some way, they were intertwined with spiritual and philosophical beliefs that gave them a sense of higher purpose while connecting to something greater than themselves.

So, to gain these qualities, I needed to uncover gratitude since it is an internal phenomenon. I needed to find out those unexamined internal interferences that were in my way of being grateful.

ON EXAMINATION
My gratitude, although innate, was well-shielded. My practice uncovered what stopped me from being thankful and appreciative.

My particular practice was based on language. So, my first and most immediate step was to pay attention to the words coming out of my mouth, the words of my internal dialogue, and the reactions of others around me.

I began to notice the construct of my sentences, tone of voice, and feelings as I spoke.

Practice, any practice, has you pay attention. Practice makes you conscious of what and why you are practicing.

If I didn't get this handled, it was apparent my current path of growing old would put me on the opposite side of gratitude, the dark, cold path of ingratitude and resentment, where I was beginning to spend lot of time.

So, ingratitude and resentment became a good place to start my practice.

GETTING CONSCIOUS
I dove into how ingratitude and resentment occurred for and in me. Ingratitude and resentment were dominant in subtle, nuanced, but everpresent ways. But after a while, my practice exposed the underbelly of ingratitude and resentment.

Here's what I uncovered:

Resentment harbored negative thoughts and emotions: bitterness, anger, jealousy, and envy.

Resentment came with destructive feelings - anger, irritation, and spite.

Resentment blocked my ability to acknowledge and appreciate.

Ingratitude and resentment were advancing me down the well-worn cultural path of "older," which makes life miserable, shortens lifespan, and, I and many others assert, decreases healthspan.

When I was resentful, I walked around feeling a kind of entitlement. Being entitled narrowed my perception that life, institutions, and people –weren't delivering what I was "owed." I felt "shortchanged."

When I was resentful, I instantly went into comparison. Comparing myself to others invariably led to feelings of inadequacy.

And when I listened to myself when entitled, I could hear my tone, words, and underlying meaning– sarcastic, skeptical, caustic, and aloof.

I also noticed entitlement always came with unrealistic expectations. Unfulfilled expectations invariably lead to being upset.

And under the upset was the unexamined and ever-present thought stream of

"I deserve."
"I deserve to have this."
"I don't deserve to be treated this way."
"I deserve to be seen in this way.
"I don't deserve to have this problem."
"I deserve better than she, him or them."

As I drilled down even further through resentment, ingratitude, "I deserve," and entitlement, I saw a "modal" verb every time. A modal verb has no end. You can't put an "s" or a "d" on it. When it comes to gratitude, that verb is "should."

Should is one of these modal verbs. Should has no ending.

Should is a word used to indicate obligation, duty, or correctness when criticizing someone's actions. But in this case, someone else's actions often turned out to be me.

MY CONCLUSIONS:
Should is the language of the self-critic.

Should is one of the most significant causes of suffering.

Should, or its brother, " shouldn't," are final judgments. Nothing else is possible.

Should is the way the ego keeps you prisoner.

Growing old should look "like this" is cultural abuse.

Should makes you right, and them, she, him, or it wrong.

Should only occurs in the past or the future but never in the present moment.

Should is not a word that is thought, spoken, or heard in gratitude.

Noticing how I "should" all over myself and much of the world around me led to resentment, ingratitude, and entitlement.

These "should's" didn't go away. But as I practiced, they became short-term guests, not permanent residents.

So, the asset gained from my gratitude practice is knowing how to keep "should" out of the building, which allows more gratitude into the building.

GRATITUDE
by Mary Oliver

What did you notice?
The dew-snail;
the low-flying sparrow;
the bat, on the wind, in the dark;
big-chested geese, in the V of sleekest performance;
the soft toad, patient in the hot sand;
the sweet-hungry ants;
the uproar of mice in the empty house;
the tin music of the cricket's body;
the blouse of the goldenrod.

What did you hear?
The thrush greeting the morning;
the little bluebirds in their hot box;
the salty talk of the wren,
then the deep cup of the hour of silence.

When did you admire?
The oaks, letting down their dark and hairy fruit;
the carrot, rising in its elongated waist;
the onion, sheet after sheet, curved inward to the pale green wand;
at the end of summer the brassy dust, the almost liquid beauty of the flowers;
then the ferns, scrawned black by the frost.

What astonished you?
The swallows making their dip and turn over the water.
What would you like to see again?
My dog: her energy and exuberance, her willingness,
her language beyond all nimbleness of tongue,
her recklessness, her loyalty, her sweetness,
her strong legs, her curled black lip, her snap.

What was most tender?
Queen Anne's lace, with its parsnip root;
the everlasting in its bonnets of wool;
the kinks and turns of the tupelo's body;
the tall, blank banks of sand;
the clam, clamped down.

What was most wonderful?
The sea, and its wide shoulders;
the sea and its triangles;
the sea lying back on its long athlete's spine.

What did you think was happening?
The green beast of the hummingbird;
the eye of the pond;
the wet face of the lily;
the bright, puckered knee of the broken oak;
the red tulip of the fox's mouth;
the up-swing, the down-pour, the frayed sleeve of the first snow—

so the gods shake us from our sleep.

Purchase the book here.

The Bold, Audacious Half-Century Legacy Plan

Tue, 01 Oct 2024 12:07:40 GMT

The Bold, Audacious Half-Century Legacy Plan

A 50-year strategic plan is also known as a long-term or 50-year vision plan. Sometimes, it is called an enduring strategic framework. All are designed to guide the stakeholders and their actions for decades.

This particular half-century plan is my legacy plan. It will be 2074 in 50 years. I certainly won't be around at 129, but I believe this plan will fully blossom then.

This legacy plan provides a broad, forward-looking roadmap for a particular segment of late-aged individuals, ensuring their decisions align with this plan's long-term goals and vision.

The plan is to inform, train, and develop those life-tested former career professionals to transition from the confines of the cultural and adopted, unexamined models of growing old to becoming a contemporary elder. Ultimately, the plan is to generate sufficient contemporary elders to influence the future.

This document is the plan's opening, context, vision, and numbers.

FOUNDATIONAL ELEMENTS OF THE PLAN
One attribute that elders develop is higher wisdom. Former career professionals have highly developed conventional wisdom but have minimally developed higher wisdom.

However, conventional wisdom can be a gateway to higher wisdom, although they are not the same.

Conventional wisdom concerns widely accepted beliefs and practical knowledge. Higher wisdom involves deeper insights and understanding that lead to a more profound understanding of life, truth, and existence.

Former career professionals became successful because they possess conventional wisdom and consistently have expanded and deepened it.

Although not the same, some of the same abilities that engendered conventional wisdom can be used to attain higher wisdom. In our culture, it's the easiest route to higher wisdom.

Contemporary elders have developed higher wisdom while retaining and sharpening their conventional wisdom. Being successful in conventional wisdom while embodying the capacities of ancient elders makes them elders for our times and, thus, contemporary elders.

This half-century plan was created by standing in both conventional and higher wisdom.

Higher wisdom allowed me to see deeper into the past and further into the future.

Higher wisdom let me distinguish the larger contexts, patterns, and trends unfolding leading to the future.

Higher wisdom enabled me to see the historical, current, and projected data in ways that opened insights into the future.

DATA FOR THE PLAN'S ASSERTIONS
In the U.S.,10,000 people a day turn 65.

Approximately 60 million people over 65 are in our country, which is 18% of the population.

By 2030, people over 65 will make up 21% of the population, surpassing Malcolm Galadwell's tipping point. This percentage will solidly put this legion into the Major Majority on the Bell curve of change—not just a foot in the door but now a firm seat at the table.

The number of people aged 65 and older in the U.S. is projected to reach around 90 million by 2050, a significant increase from approximately 60 million today.

By 2050, those over 65 will be 45% of the U.S. population.

By 2050, the number of people over 65 will outnumber those under 15. [Note*—This is the final element to shift the context.]

When the context shifts, the culture shifts.

The culture will shift from youth over age to age over youth. [Note* - First time on the planet.]

The opportunity for peace, equanimity, and reconciliation becomes much more available when this contextual shift occurs.

Although some shift will have occurred previously, the 2050 numbers will happen, and age-over-youth will become gravity.

Today, spending by people over 50 is 53% of our economy. Due to longer life expectancy by 2050, spending by people over 50 will rise further as this group represents an even more significant portion of the population that remains active in the economy. In a consumer culture, this makes them heavyweights.

Today, 50% of startups are by people over 50. This percentage will only increase because investors have observed that those over 50 present less risk and have better chances for success.

Americans 65 and older hold a significant portion of the country's wealth. Current estimates are that people over 65 control 40% to 45% of the total U.S. household wealth.

In dollar terms, this wealth is approximately $35 trillion to $40 trillion. At the same time, the U.S. economy is estimated at $26.6 trillion.

Money has power, real leverage, and a booming voice.

The wealth of those 65 and older will increase because they spend less and keep more money in their portfolios. Their wealth will grow faster than other generations.

Today, one out of five will make it past 90.
This ratio should be adjusted for my particular market, which is former career professionals.

Former career professionals exhibit significant practices that increase their lifespan and health span: education, retirement incomes, and access to better health care.

If things stay relatively steady, and of course, that's a big if, their odds of making it into their 90s are far better than those of the general population their age.

Lastly, former career professionals were strongly purpose-driven. They know how to unify themselves around a purpose, which made them successful in their careers. Their experience of purpose is now gone, leaving them empty. They are eagerly seeking to live in that experience of purpose again.

PROFILING THE MARKET
Check the Boxes:

Potential contemporary elders check most or all of these boxes.

MARKET SIZE

It is reasonable to estimate that a large portion—perhaps 40-60%—of the 60 million people aged 65 and older were former career professionals, meaning they held long-term, skill-based jobs in business, healthcare, government, education, and skilled trades.

This could amount to roughly 24 to 36 million people.

I used the 80/20 rule to estimate my market size. It's crude, but it's an excellent place to start. I multiplied the average age between 24 and 36 million, 30 million, by 20%, resulting in an initial market range of 6 million.

Knowing our market's characteristics, qualities, and unmet needs makes the SEO design and outreach straightforward. Former career professionals search, read, watch, talk, and social network, wondering how to answer the last-third-of-life questions.

This late-aged market has already done or is currently engaged with trusts, wills, executors, and end-of-life plans. But they also feel the strong pull of something else, something fundamentally and deeply missing.

They are sensing some revelation, insight, sign, disclosure, or something that would make a profound difference at this time in their lives, but they are not sure what that is.

The plan is the container that addresses and satisfies what this market is seeking. The who and how of this can be done have been proven. We can transform qualified late-aged people into contemporary elders.

The ambitious and vital plan foresees a deep integration of elders' presence and values into all facets of society by 2050. This will reshape how we view aging and create a cultural shift toward honoring wisdom, experience, and guidance from older generations.

What is an elder for our times, a contemporary elder, and how will they change – themselves and the world?

Well, you'll just have to read the book for that.

Available October 1 ^st on Amazon and October 10 ^th in Bookstores. PURCHASE HERE.

"Dr. Cooper's latest book, Older to Elder, is a powerful plea for action, reminding us that life is fleeting and the importance of embracing change and personal growth as we age. Marc challenges us to embody the wisdom that comes with age, take personal responsibility for leading a more liberated, fulfilling life, and positively impacting the world."

Dr. Mark Silberg

Founder and Chairman

Before I Go

www.Be4-I-go.com

WHY MEXICO: Home, Not Exile [6-minute read]

Tue, 17 Sep 2024 12:30:00 GMT

WHY MEXICO: Home, Not Exile [6-minute read]

Casitas in Loreto Bay with a view of the Sea of Cortez

People keep asking me why I have chosen to live in Loreto Bay in Baja (BCS), Mexico, for over half the year. Given the time, expense, and inconvenience of international living and travel, living in another culture, they wonder why I chose here.

They also wonder why I deal with the many difficulties, unforeseen costs, uncertainties, and breakdowns of living in a hand-built Casita home within a tiny community on the Sea of Cortez.

And invariably, people bring up all my own considerations; "You're going to be eighty in April. You are far away from the services and resources of the U.S. What if you have a medical emergency? What do you do for fruit and vegetables? How do you maintain two residences? Your Spanish is terrible."

All true.

But for me, this is a place and space apart, "Far from the Maddening Crowds," as Thomas Hardy named his book.

My Neighbors

Loreto offers me a place:

· to "be" and rest

· to walk in beauty undisturbed

· to write

· to read

· to reflect

· to sink in the harmonies and rhythms of the natural world

· to hike and walk in the mountains of the Sierra de la Giganta

· to breathe clean air

· to feel the ocean breezes

· to dismantle myself from the tensions of politics where truth and integrity have no meaning

· to spend time with the Blue and Gray Wales and the dolphins and the organic experience they provide

· to be in silence without interruption

· to laugh till it hurts with intimate friends

· to go to Pedro’s for Tequila Tuesdays

· to allow the Muse to awaken

· to witness magnificent sunrises, sunsets, stars so visible, and the moon so bright

· to be within the Mexican culture, where kindness, appreciation, extended families, and true neighborliness exist

· to discover and learn: to receive the teachings of patience that I need to cultivate, given the uncertainties of life and growing old

· to keep up with the seasonality of my life, recognizing what and how to let go

· to spend uninterrupted time with my teachers, living and dead, whose videos, recordings, and online interactions deepen my learning

· to cause a renaissance in myself as an elder so as not to enter the dark ages of growing old

· to preempt the valley of rejection, the path of regression, and stagnation's depression that comes with growing old

· to watch my dog Ajax, love the beach

· to genuinely appreciate this life, the life I have left

· to remember in life, I’m the guest, not the owner

· to understand "this is it," no matter what I want or think

· to recognize my life has a drop-dead ending

· to feel the connection with the cosmos more deeply

· to be in a place where people say Via Con Dios and indeed mean it

__________________________________________________________________________

· to fulfill Gandhi’s requirement: “Be the change you wish to see in the world.”

· to figure out how to evoke growth, wisdom, and inner change in others

· to continue to create for myself the distinction of contemporary elder and make this manifest in the world

__________________________________________________________________________

Elders in the Plaza of Loreto

My ‘calle’ in Loreto

===================================

Becoming an Elder
by Cathy Carmody

Leaving behind my journey of struggling and racing through
the white water of many rivers, I become the river,
creating my own unique way.

Leaving behind my self-imposed role as a tree upon
which others have leaned, I now become the wind,
with the freedom to blow whenever and wherever I choose.

Leaving behind the boxes I've created in my life, crammed with
roles, responsibilities, rules and fears,
I become the wild and unpredictable space
within which flowers sprout and grow.

Leaving behind the years of yearning for others
to see me as somebody,
I soften into becoming my future,
with permission from SELF to
continually unfold as I choose, without concern
for how others may see me.

Leaving behind years of telling and teaching,
I become instead a mirror
into which others can peer and
view reflections of themselves to consider.

Leaving behind the urge to provide answers for others,
I become – in the silence of this forest retreat
– the question.

Leaving behind the rigor of my intellect,
I become a single candle in the
darkness, offering myself as a beacon for others
to create their own path.
I become an elder.

===================================

BEING IN THE SILENCE

“We need to find God, and he cannot be found in noise and restlessness. God is the friend of silence. See how nature - trees, flowers, grass- grows in silence; see the stars, the moon and the sun, how they move in silence. We need silence to be able to touch our souls.” – Mother Teresa

Loreto offers me that silence.

BEING WITH THE STARS

The stars instill a sense of wonder and awe in me. The vastness of the universe mesmerizes, making me feel connected to something much more significant than myself.

The stars remind me of how small I am in the grand scheme of things, putting my daily worries into context.

The beauty and mystery of the night sky inspire my creativity.

These stars I am with have existed for billions of years, offering a glimpse into the past and the future, creating a sense of eternity, and reminding me of my minuteness and finiteness.

I often experience a spiritual connection or cosmic consciousness, seeing the stars as a bridge to a higher understanding of the divine.

The stillness brings about a sense of serenity and quiet contemplation.

And when I am followed by my Moonshadow, my soul’s silent companion appears.

THE MAGIC OF LORETO

To live in the stillness with unperturbed quiet. To walk among the epic Saguaro cactus and many of its cactus siblings: the pipe cactus, the Galloping cactus, the hedgehog cactus.

To walk under and around the Honey Mesquite, Lychee, Trumpet, and heavy-laden Mango trees.

To look around and up at the intense flowering plants on the many roof gardens on Casitas’ second and third floors.

And when you look up, you see the many varieties of palm trees, lining the “paseo,” giving the trade winds their sound.

The exact place to create a transformational program to help best people leap from older to older. I shall use Loreto’s magic to create my magic.

QUESTION ANSWERED

And now have answered your question, “Why Mexico?”

It’s a blessing bestowed. One for me that I sometimes struggle to deserve.

ANNOUNCEMENT

Welcome to the Grow Old as an Elder Program

Imagine a place where the passage of time is not something to fear but something to embrace—a place where aging becomes a transformative, sacred experience.

This unique program will surround you with an environment of wisdom, calm, and purpose—the energy of ancient knowledge mingled with modern understanding—in a magic place of sanctuary for reflection, growth, and deepening of one’s spirit.

The boundaries between past, present, and future dissolve, leaving only the experience of being fully alive, fully aware, and fully able to experience being an elder—a new state of being.

In this program, we embrace what it means to grow old as an elder, not simply as one who ages but as one who transcends time. The elder within is revealed, nurtured, and empowered through guided practices, communal wisdom, and individual reflection.

Here, transformation is not only possible; it is inevitable.

February 16th, 17th, 18th, & 19 ^th

Loreto Bay, BCS, Mexico

Registration and details October 2024

The program is limited to 15 participants

Note*—In numerology, 15 is associated with personal growth, transformation, and pursuing meaningful goals. It also represents a life path emphasizing independence, self-reliance, and adaptability—perfect for the transformation from older to elder.

DISCERNMENT THE ELDER'S GATEWAY

Tue, 10 Sep 2024 18:06:19 GMT

DISCERNMENT: THE ELDER'S GATEWAY
[7-minue read]

Discernment
"Discernment is not a matter of telling the difference between right and wrong; rather, it is telling the difference between right and almost right. – Charles Spurgeon

Discernment is the ability to perceive, understand, and judge things clearly, especially those that are not obvious or straightforward. It is also defined as the ability to grasp and comprehend obscure information.

Discernment allows elders to know the stranger within and the uncertain world without. It involves perceiving, recognizing, and distinguishing the finer aspects of situations, ideas, and their experiences.

Discernment means recognizing the deeper meanings, motivations, and consequences that happen as life is lived.

Discernment displaces distraction.

Discernment is vital in developing self-awareness and self-knowledge, which enable elders to navigate life with greater clarity, insight, serenity, and purpose.

Discernment allows elders to talk and, most importantly, be heard by unobservant people. Elders sense how to have meaningful conversations with these people, and with discernment, elders increase others' discernment.

Discernment is a transformative process closely tied to distinctions, self-inquiry, and insights, ultimately leading to wisdom.

Discernment is the discipline elders practice.

The Nature of Discernment
"Obscurity is dispelled by augmenting the light of discernment, not by attacking the darkness." - Socrates

For elders, discernment is way deeper than choosing right or wrong. Seeing something as right or something wrong teaches nothing. Right or wrong provides no insights or greater awareness but only validates your existing beliefs.

Discernment does not rely on beliefs.

Elders know beliefs are false causes.

Discernment goes below the surface to uncover the previously unrecognized, often hidden patterns that shape perception that determine behavior. Elders understand, change what you see, change what you do.

Discernment and the Process of Distinctions
"The more you can increase your discernment, the more comfortable you will be in handling uncertainty." – Brian Tracy

Discernment allows elders to determine distinctions. Distinctions are the mental processes by which elders separate and categorize different aspects of life’s experiences.

Distinctions allow elders to differentiate between similar yet distinct elements, making deeper understanding possible.

Creating distinctions is foundational because it allows elders to see things as they are rather than through preconceived concepts or convictions.

Distinctions help elders move beyond binary thinking—seeing things as simply right or wrong, black or white—whereas distinctions open up a spectrum of possibilities.

By sharpening their ability to distinguish, elders become better equipped to perceive reality in its complete and unadorned uncertainty.

Self-Inquiry and the Role of Discernment
"When you learn what you can live without, you are able to ask life for the very best because you possess the gift of discernment. You are able to create an authentic life because you are able to make conscious choices." - Sarah Ban Breathnach

Self-inquiry is the process of introspection and reflection that leads to a deeper understanding of oneself. It involves identifying thoughts, emotions, experiences, beliefs, and actions to reveal underlying motivations and patterns.

Self-questioning and self-examination help peel away layers of conditioning, allowing elders to have a more authentic and insightful understanding of themselves.

Discernment’s self-inquiry allows elders to separate transient thoughts and emotions from core values and principles.

Self-inquiry helps people identify and unchain from the beliefs unconsciously adopted from societal conditioning, family expectations, or cultural norms that have defined them throughout their lives.

Elders' discernment in self-inquiry involves realizing the difference between what they think they know and what they understand.

Elders are constantly reminded that what they think they know “isn't necessarily so.”

Self-inquiry requires humility and an openness to challenging personal assumptions and long-held beliefs. It also requires being OK with being wrong. Being right keeps self-inquiry away.

Elders understand they can't change something they are unwilling to see about themselves.

This way, discernment’s self-inquiry becomes an essential tool for self-transformation. No outsiders are required.

Insights and the Path to Wisdom
"Insight perceives, intelligence understands, intellect comprehends, wisdom knows." ― Matshona Dhliwayo

Discernment allows elders to see the relationship between seemingly unrelated events, ideas, or emotions, providing them with a more integrated view of themselves and reality—something AI can’t, and never will, be able to do. Machines can’t have insights; they can only conclude.

Discernment is not a passive process but an active engagement with life. It involves looking beyond as well as into appearances and assumptions and accepting complexity and ambiguity.

Discernment requires the courage to confront uncomfortable truths and let go of comforting or righteous illusions. Wisdom occurs when the uncomfortable truths are owned, and the illusions dispelled.

Wisdom, in turn, is the capacity to make practical, ethical, and compassionate choices without restraint. Wisdom allows elders to trust themselves to express themselves.

Wisdom involves seeing the interconnections and understanding that their actions have consequences beyond immediate circumstances.

With wisdom, elders learn to navigate life's complexities and absurdities. You become more adept at recognizing the difference between what is essential and what is trivial, what is true and what is false, and what is beneficial and what is harmful.

Discernment allows elders to cultivate wisdom and its ensemble of clarity, compassion, humility, and integrity.

"True discernment means not only distinguishing the right from the wrong; it means distinguishing the primary from the secondary, the essential from the indifferent, and the permanent from the transient. And, yes, it means distinguishing between the good and the better, and even between the better and the best."- Sinclair B. Ferguson

Discernment
"To see the unseen in all that appears,
To hear the quiet beneath the noise of years,
To know the truth beyond what's supposedly clear,
This the elder magic of being a discerning seeker."
- Marc Cooper

-----------------------------------------
MAKING MY CASE

OPENING STATEMENT: KNOW THIS
The population is aging, birth rates are declining, and life expectancy is increasing, a megatrend that will continue for decades.

Lifespan has nearly doubled in the past century, a remarkable success story, from age 45 to today's 79.

In the U.S., 10,000 people turn 65 daily, the fastest-growing population in the country and in the world.

By 2050, the number of people 50 and older will double.

In 25 years, people over 65 will outnumber people younger than 15.

Today, people over 50 and older account for 50% of spending in the U.S. and 83% of household wealth, and these percentages will only increase.

Over half of the children now being born are expected to live to the age of 100 and beyond.

By 2050, 45% of the U.S. population will be older than 65, and people over 80 will make up 8% of the population.

CLOSING ARGUMENT: HERE’S WHAT’S POSSIBLE
If 20% of 65-year-olds became genuine elders, our country's political, social, familial, and spiritual context and systems would be transformed.

Peace, compassion, common sense, and a higher purpose would be alive at home, in our communities, in our nation, and in our world.

Older to Elder is a time that's come. Help me make this possibility possible.

Become a Patron (Click HERE. )

VANQUISHING VULNERABILITY

Tue, 03 Sep 2024 12:38:19 GMT

VANQUISHING VULNERABILITY

Vulnerability is viewed as a state of being open to harm, whether physically or emotionally. Yet, embracing vulnerability incites a profound transformation—a shift from self-protection to authentic presence. It is a risky and, most often, frightening place to be because you have no armor.

When I remove my armor, most often piece by piece, I stay grounded, knowing that vulnerability is not a weakness but my door to deeper self-understanding and connection.

Vulnerability makes me look deep inside myself. Am I willing to "doff" my armor? When one removes a suit of armor, it is referred to as "doffing" the armor. "Doff" means taking off or removing clothing or armor.

Am I willing to be the original, bare, unadorned "me?" Am I willing to disregard those internal voices of the inner critic? Am I willing to take the risk of just being who I am? Do I have the bravery to hold myself whole, completed, with nothing left out?

I noticed whenever I perceived a threat or hazard, I instinctively put my armor on. The armor protected me from being exposed. But inside the armor, what I wanted to protect became an excruciating loud clanging in my helmet. "Clang. - You're not good enough – clang, clang."

For me to be vulnerable, the armor pieces needed to come off, and the wrenching tool to remove the pieces was consciousness and self-awareness. Once the pieces were identified, these tools could get underneath the pieces and pop them off.

Consciousness allowed me to identify the armor parts that allowed me to dodge vulnerability.

See if any of these armor pieces are yours as well.

Over-Rationalizing Emotions:

One piece of my armor was rationalizing emotions. Rationalizing feelings allowed me not to feel them. Rationalizing emotions enabled me to maintain control and avoid the discomfort of emotional exposure.

Perfectionism:

The shoulder pieces of my armor were striving for perfection. Just another defense mechanism against vulnerability. Focusing on perfection, I avoided situations where I might be judged or rejected for my flaws.

People-Validating:

My chest plate was seeking approval. Being validated by people came from a fear of rejection and a critical judgment of not being good enough, which always led me to suppress my authentic self-expression.

Defensiveness:

My armor's leg covers were my reflexive defensive reactions, designed to shield me from criticism and feedback. These pieces protected me from being seen as wrong or imperfect.

Avoiding Difficult Conversations:

My arm coverings were avoiding honest or challenging conversations, particularly those involving expressing my true feelings. Avoidance was my reliable way to defend against vulnerability.

Keep Relationships Superficial:

My shield was to have relationships that lacked depth and emotional intimacy. Keeping it superficial kept me safe. Pretending to be there but wasn't. The arrows of intimacy couldn't get through my shield.

Numbing Behaviors:

My sword was behaviors that numb emotions—it was the standard way for me to avoid facing vulnerable feelings like sadness, loneliness, or fear.

Difficulty Asking for Coaching or Support:

When I struggled and failed to ask for help or rely on others, it was due to the discomfort of being seen as weak, needy, and, worse, unlikeable.

Always Being the Caretaker:

The metal flanges that covered my 'butt' was avoiding exposure by always caring for others. No wonder I became a professional caregiver. Kept the distance, made me emotionally unavailable, and put me in control.

Keeping Busy:

Constantly filling my schedule to avoid being with people.

Avoiding Risks:

The pieces of my armor covering my knees were my avoidance of taking risks—whether emotional, professional, or personal—because I wanted to avoid the potential for failure or rejection.

Reluctance to Share

I noticed my reluctance to share myself in many situations to avoid vulnerability because it acted as a protective barrier, keeping to myself kept others at a distance.

WHO SAYS SO
It's not just me saying it; some authorities report that vulnerability is a powerful means of accessing self-discovery, self-awareness, and self-development. Indeed, it has been for me.

Brene Brown's research shows vulnerability is essential for authentic connection, courage, and resilience. It's not about oversharing but about being honest, even when uncomfortable.

Psychologist Carl Rogers emphasized that genuine connections require vulnerability because they involve sharing our true selves. This aligns with Brown's findings that vulnerability fosters empathy and strengthens relationships.

Vulnerability is also crucial for personal growth. Erik Erikson's psychosocial stages suggest that embracing vulnerability during life's challenges strengthens our sense of identity and purpose.

Existentialists like Sartre saw vulnerability as central to human existence, arguing that it allows us to confront our authentic selves.

The Buddha taught that suffering arises from attachments and aversions. Becoming vulnerable absolutely challenges your attachments to self-image and aversions to your imperfections.

Vulnerability calls you to untie from your attachments and aversions. When you embrace vulnerability, you have nothing to protect.

As Brene Brown says, "Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, and creativity—a profound affirmation of our shared humanity."

Are you brave enough, courageous enough, daring enough to take off your armor?

Eulogy

After 40 years with no reruns, it is time to end the many hundreds of episodes of the MBC show. As one critic said, "A show that never disappointed. Always changed and was always relevant for our times."

MBC has had an exceptionally long run, one leading man with hundreds of different characters, ensembles, supporting cast members, and crews.

Dentists (solo, partner, group, DSOs), physicians (groups and IPAs), executives and boards of DSOs, hospitals, hospital systems, third parties, special interest groups, banks, professional organizations, the Federal and several State governments, equity partners, business incubators, vendors, clearinghouses, Fortune 500 (GE Capital, Boeing and Merck), seventeen countries, a million and quarter air miles, twelves books, 2000 articles, number of podcasts and videos, and the many remarkable people that MBC got to work with and learn from over four decades.

"I became who I was meant to be through MBC—every win, every loss, every lesson learned, every relationship encountered. MBC shaped my skills, fueled my growth, and instilled the courage to embrace change, take risks, and dream boldly."

"Farewell, MBC—vision accomplished!"

The Manifestation of Older to Elder: The Transformation of Joe Biden

Tue, 27 Aug 2024 12:30:01 GMT

The Manifestation of Older to Elder: The Transformation of Joe Biden

[A 4-minute Read]

Preface:
This essay is my view; therefore, it is not "the" truth. It is how I see the world. Given that it is conceptual, not tangible, you can take it or leave it. You are always the gatekeeper and the bouncer of what you believe.

My view is based on my work transitioning people from older to elder. That's what I do in the world. That's who I am. With my background, I am pointing to a phenomenon I witnessed based on my understanding and direct experience as an elder.

The purpose of this essay is to present an interpretation to explain an observed phenomenon, the transformation from older to elder.

The physical evidence is undeniable. Just look at the before-and-after pictures in the header.

Framing It Up:
Transformation is a process of profound change that fundamentally alters the nature, function, or condition of something or someone. In this transformation, the “someone” is Joe Biden, and then all the "somethings" changed.

Biden's transformation from older to elder involved a mammoth shift in mindset, beliefs, values, and behaviors, leading to a new way of experiencing and engaging with himself and his world.

His transformation occurred on all planes—mental, physical, emotional, spiritual, and relational. Everything changed—all at once. A "big bang" occurred, and a new universe was born.

Joe Biden was pinched into the culture's classic "older." Hey Joe, it isn't personal.

That's ageism. Ageism is real, pervasive, insidious, persistent, and prevails in our culture. Everywhere, all the time, embedded and worsening.

If you're fortunate enough to grow old, you'll inevitably encounter ageism. It's a cultural constant. In our Western culture, being old is equated with being obsolete. As the pace of change quickens, obsolete increasingly means useless, outmoded, expired, and discardable.

When you get old, you’ll experience discrimination. You’re believed to be pricey in time and money with no ROI. Your middle-aged kids, the neighborhood, the city, the state, the healthcare system, and the economy see you as a problem.

The language of discrimination is "prejudice." Prejudice is a preconceived opinion, judgment, or attitude about a group that is not based on reason, facts, or actual experience.

Prejudice entails shaping opinions and beliefs about others without knowing them or understanding their circumstances. Our culture harbors entrenched preconceptions about aging, degrading biases rock-solid in place.

These preconceived opinions, beliefs, and assessments about aging are the very source of why older people are marginalized, segregated, isolated, and, finally, warehoused.

The notion that aging, a natural and unstoppable process, is perceived as unwelcome and needs to be overcome is a classic oxymoron.

The Transformation
Biden didn't stand a chance against ageism’s bias, stereotyping, irrationality, and negativity. His political exposure as president invited and received a mega-wallop of ageism.

Even with his heart, experience, wisdom, and heroic legislative achievements, he had zero chance of changing the storyline.

As the protagonist of this story, he quickly went from asset to liability.

When you face an unmoveable issue that can't be reformed, like ageism, you must choose between forfeiting, fighting, or changing.Biden realized that continuing to resist and fight would keep the issue stuck and make it even worse. He saw that his resistance caused persistence. It was getting ugly for everybody.

He became wide awake to the reality of the truth: "I am old." There was no more denial, no more self-deception. All his political and conventional wisdom, those 50 years of experience and service, carried absolutely no weight. Biden found himself in the "dark night of the soul."

Biden realized that clinging desperately to his past, grasping to remain who he wanted to be, had no standing. He stopped just listening but now heard—trusted voices finally landing.

Biden stopped averting, resisting, rationalizing, and defying. Acceptance was his first existential step in moving from older to elder. He had to give in and give up, surrender to the "what's so.”

The insight struck. For Biden, the choice was clear—a choice that altered his perception of himself and the rest of his world. A choice fostered by insight, revelation, expanded consciousness, and genuine self-awareness. “I am old. I am seen as infirm, feeble, and weak.”

He had to get the old self out of the way.

Now, higher wisdom bubbled up. He saw who he needed to be and what he needed to do. He saw that his values, principles, and higher purpose were far more important than being right. He was built for the higher road.

In that moment of insight, the caterpillar turned into a butterfly; older became elder.

Biden was able to put the Headstone on who he had been.

Looking back, Biden realized that he had gone through the stages: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and now, finally, acceptance. He mourned his former life’s death and affirmed that it was history. He stopped grieving for what “should be " and accepted “what is.” And he also recognized who he needed to be in the future.

And now, the person looking at the Tombstone of who he had been was a wise, benevolent, faith-based, and values-driven man —someone who cared about future generations and had compassion and empathy for his party, the planet, and people’s suffering. It wasn’t about the old Joe anymore.

President Biden was now living Christopher Logue’s poem "Come to the Edge.":

Come to the edge.
We might fall.
Come to the edge.
It's too high! Come to the edge!
And they came, and he pushed,
And they flew .

Biden flew: age to sage, conventional wisdom to higher wisdom, resistance to surrender, righteousness to rightfulness, self to service, protective to trusting, blame to responsibility, defiance to dignity, grit to grace; it was all there. Biden transformed from older to elder.

Dr. Marc Cooper
Founder. Teacher. Benefactor.
The Contemporary Elder Institute www.requestingwisdom.com
Author - Older to Elder www.drmarcbcooper.com
LinkedIn - www.linkedin.com/in/drmarcbcooper/

Announcements:

Growing Old as an Elder:

· A three and half-day program

· February 2025

· Loreto Bay BCS Mexico (Direct flights to Loreto are available from Los Angeles, San Francisco, and Phoenix.)

· Hotel or Casita rentals will be made available.

· Daily high temperatures from 74°F to 77°F, rarely exceeding 83°F. Evening temperatures range from 59°F, rarely falling below 53°F or exceeding 65°F. Nearly always sunny.

· Program limited to 15 Participants

· Registration opens in November 2024

The program's purpose is for participants who are growing old and facing the last third of their lives to realize they can consciously choose how they age.

Going Public, Promotion, and Patrons:

Our PR company will send this essay, minus the announcements, to agents in the media to promote the book and open the gates for our public campaign of older to elder.

We believe that if “elders” were present in our world, there would be more peace, compassion, cooperation, and sensibility. Our work, and the work of our members, is about transforming late age from older to elder.

You can join our campaign as a patron. There is no request for money, just your intention and support to actualize older to elder. The book is the platform. Patrons will set the context. (Click HERE )

Public Launch - Older to Elder: The Thinking and Being of a Contemporary Elder -October 1 ^st , 2024

Author’s Website - www.drmarcbcooper.com

MY TERM PAPER: Quantum Physics, Consciousness and God

Wed, 14 Aug 2024 19:07:36 GMT

MY TERM PAPER:

Quantum Physics, Consciousness and God

Preamble: Should I or Shouldn't I
Do I dare?

Do I dare post how I see the universe and risk what people will think of me?

How will they judge, assess, compare, and what will they conclude about me?

Fortunately, being willing to open yourself to other people's judgment becomes so much less of a consideration the older you get. You stop caring what other people think. Especially when you know your thinking, not theirs, which creates reality. To each their own.

My educational background has stayed steadfast from my late teens to today, culminating in my current insights. My curiosity and craving to learn basic science, physics, existentialism, and metaphysics have never stopped; they have only deepened over the years.

I believe I have come to comprehend something for and about myself that opened a deeper understanding of myself, consciousness, and God.

Consequently, I thought posting it for thoughtful consideration might impact how you think about yourself and the world. Of course, it might not. Ultimately, you are the decider of your reality.

Fortuitously, my understanding is not alone. Renowned physicists and philosophers have agreed with my view.

Like me, they argue that consciousness is not just a human phenomenon but a fundamental aspect of the universe, potentially synonymous with God or a divine principle.

I suggest that what I'm sharing is worth considering if you're seeking to understand yourself and the universe; it may offer you a new perspective.

Introduction
I have been exploring the intersections of consciousness, quantum mechanics, and the concept of God off and on for many years, but intensively over the last three years.

This time, the exploration opened a profound philosophical and scientific insight into the nature of my existence, my perception of self and the world, and the fundamental fabric of reality.

My inquiry has led me to consider the existence of God not as a distinct entity but as the very essence, the radiating source of consciousness itself. If asked, "What is God," I would now respond, "God is total and all-encompassing consciousness. Each of us is part of that consciousness."

But what is consciousness?

Consciousness is described as the subjective awareness of oneself and the environment. However, this description falls far short of fully distinguishing consciousness because it is an inherently subjective and individual experience.

By nature, descriptions attempt to capture and convey complex experiences or states of being using limited and often simplified language. Consciousness doesn’t lend itself to this kind of language, so it's no wonder consciousness has remained an elusive concept in philosophy, physics, and neuroscience.

Consciousness can't be scientifically established because it is formless and doesn't exist in time and space. Yet consciousness is the precursor of self-awareness, cognition, reasoning, planning, and imagination.

Consciousness allows you to read and understand the words you’re reading now.

Consciousness enables your perception and experience to work through your senses beyond your thinking mind.

Consciousness allows reflection on your experiences and the ability to make decisions based on past events and future goals.

Consciousness provides the foundation for your emotional experience – joy, sorrow, and empathy.

Consciousness enables your ability to distinguish. This ability allows you to delineate, compare, clarify, adjust decision-making, and be creative in your life.

Consciousness opens the door to exploring spiritual and existential domains, seeking meaning, purpose, and understanding.

Consciousness transcends the limitations of physicality and delves into timeless realms where consciousness intertwines with quantum physics.

Consciousness is what defines you in every dimension. Without consciousness, there is no you and no world.

Consciousness allows your existence; you are the container in which consciousness exists.

Consciousness: A Phenomenon Beyond Definition
Trying to understand consciousness has been a long-standing exploration.

Sir Isaac Newton began the inquiry 356 years ago when he proposed the first law of physics, the law of gravity. But this discovery immediately led him to ask the second question: “What’s causing the law of gravity?”

The physicists who followed Newton couldn't answer the question of consciousness either, and we are talking about some heavy hitters: Einstein, Bohr, Hawkins, Plank, and Heisenberg. All were lost for a scientific explanation of consciousness.

They all recognize that consciousness does not occur in time or space. There are no distances, no before or after, in consciousness. Since consciousness has no form, time, or distance, consciousness can't be measured.

Consequently, the scientific method is useless.

Philosophers also struck out. Kant, Hume, Hegel, Nietzche, Kierkegaard, Wittgenstein were stumped. Although Ken Wilber, in his books "A Brief History of Everything" and "Integral Spirituality," gets to it.

But physicists, philosophers, and, of course, metaphysicists agreed that consciousness encompasses our thoughts, emotions, perceptions, and self-awareness, yet its exact nature defies description, characterization, classification, and meaning. It's like pointing to the moon, but it's not the moon.

Neuroscience attempted to understand consciousness by studying brain processes and neural connections.

However, consciousness's "hard problem" persisted—how physical processes in the brain can give rise to subjective experiences couldn’t be explained.

When something is subjective, an individual's unique perspective shapes reality, thus varying from person to person. This means there is no fixed reality.

No one can deny that consciousness exists. Even thoughts, conversations, and opinions about consciousness wouldn't exist without it. Consciousness is the boundless arena where the self and the world come into being.

Quantum Theory: The Dance of Particles and Waves
Quantum theory revolutionized my understanding of the physical world at its most fundamental level. Quantum mechanics describes the behavior of particles and waves at ultra-microscopic scales, where traditional Newtonian physics breaks down.

The fundamental principles of quantum mechanics include wave-particle duality, the uncertainty principle, and quantum entanglement—phenomena that changed my intuitive notions of a fixed, “out there” reality.

One interpretation of quantum mechanics, championed by physicists, suggests that consciousness plays a crucial role in collapsing the wave function of electrons. In this process, probabilistic outcomes become definite measurables - waves become particles.
An electron exists equally in both forms: a particle and a wave. Until an observer is present, it exists as a probability. The observer determines whether it appears as a particle or a wave. Hence, consciousness determines existence. No observer, no existence, just probabilities.

This concept proposes a connection between the observer's consciousness and the physical manifestation of reality.

The observer determines whether an electron becomes a particle or a wave, proving a deeper interrelationship between consciousness and matter.

God as Consciousness: A Transcendent Perspective
I now believe that the concept of God transcends current religious and spiritual contexts. God, as I now understand it, is not confined to various doctrines' traditional roles or attributes.

God is not a “something.”

My perspective implies that God's consciousness is the creative force behind the universe, the very essence that brings order, purpose, and intention to the universe. Yes, I said intention.

I believe the universe itself is imbued with this form of consciousness. This cosmic awareness underlies all phenomena, from the smallest atomic particle to the stars and planets in space.

This consciousness is not limited by time or space; it is the foundation of all that is and all that will be.

Since consciousness does not exist in time or space but is always required for manifestation, it totally shatters the "Big Bang" theory. Without consciousness, you couldn't have had a Big Bang occur.

My insight, individual consciousness, sense of self-awareness, and experiences are intrinsically linked to this greater cosmic consciousness. My consciousness is a reflection, a fragment of this consciousness.

Conclusion :
This is my perspective from where I now understand the universe, God, and myself.

Is it true?

Is it valid?

Does it matter if it is true? My consciousness creates my reality and determines what's true or not. When Gandhi said, “Only God knows the ultimate truth,” he got it right.

You see, I couldn't have these thoughts without consciousness, and you couldn't read these words without consciousness. And where consciousness comes from may not be in our heads but from a larger consciousness. Without a cosmic consciousness, my individual consciousness would not exist.

Top Physicist Saying It His Way

ANNOUNCEMENTS
Patron Invitations for Older to Elder

NEW Program
GROWING OLD AS AN ELDER
Loreto Bay BCS Mexico, February 2025

A four-day program to grow old into a future of creativity and consciousness that is not dictated by the culture or your mind.

More information coming soon.

NEXT SANGHA CAL L
August 28 ^th , 4:00 pm PT / 7:00 pm ET. Find out more HERE .

FORWARD THIS LESSON
Who else in your world should read this? Feel free to share this blog to anyone you think would benefit.

MINING FOR HIGHER PURPOSE

Thu, 08 Aug 2024 15:00:00 GMT

MINING FOR HIGHER PURPOSE

[5-minute read]

A higher purpose differs from a business or personal purpose in scope, motivation, and impact. Business and personal purposes are specific to individual or organizational goals and needs.

In contrast, a higher purpose transcends these boundaries and is rooted in a broader, more existential metaphysical vision—think Elon Musk versus Gandhi.

Once you exit your career, you become disengaged from various personal and most business purposes—those that gave you “the juice" are now extinct. You have tried substitutes: travel, volunteer work, grandkids, and various physical and social activities, but invariably, these activities lack the kind of challenge, spirit, and energy charge you need to give deeper meaning to your life.

You have become aware that you lack purpose. You feel it; a diminished sense of self is starting to impact your quality of life.

But you also know that the kind of purpose that was useful in the past will be useless in the future.

You're beginning to notice the outer effects of purposelessness: listlessness, irritability, and isolation. Resignation, resentment, and a touch of gloom are creeping in.

In other domains, you have done your work. You have stayed healthy by not fooling yourself. Prevention and early treatment are part of who you are now. When symptoms arise, you don't pretend anymore. Honesty, intentionality, and responsibility are also necessary to find your greater purpose.

Intellectualism was also an attribute you've kept going. Your mind still hungry to learn and grow. You kept yourself engaged with books, videos, and podcasts. You stayed current.

You continued seeking knowledge. You persisted in engaging your thinking mind, but it hasn’t yet opened the door to an advanced purpose.

You recognized you are purpose-driven. That's how you are constituted. You're built for purpose. But you have no purpose that inspires, enlightens, or generates commitment. No raison d'être.

How do you identify your elevated purpose, a purpose not based on the past, your previous identities, and your various acceptable personas? That train and its passengers have long left the station.

How do you distinguish a purpose calling you to be your highest self, intentional, committed, and passionate? A purpose that takes you to a higher state of being. A higher purpose.

Here’s how elders do it.

HOW ELDERS MINE THEIR HIGHER PURPOSE

Higher wisdom is required for elders to discover their higher purpose. Higher wisdom is a profound and insightful understanding of life beyond mere knowledge or intelligence. It allows elders to see the bigger picture, understand complex truths, and apply this understanding to promote well-being in body, mind, and soul.

Elders cultivate higher wisdom through awareness of the fundamental truths about life, human nature, and the universe. They see more of the whole package, including insights into the nature of existence, relationships, and the interconnectedness of all things. Higher wisdom is the answer to unlocking a higher purpose.

Elders understand that higher wisdom is already present within them. It cannot be taught, learned, or memorized. It's an inside job. It needs to be uncovered.

Therefore, excavation is needed to reach higher wisdom. They become their own archeological site. Elders must dig out self-deception, hubris, and imposter syndrome, which are heavy layers on top of their higher wisdom. They've got to go deeper through these packed layers to reach that vane of higher wisdom.

As a mining operation, elders must find the best tools. They strap on their headlamps, prepare their picks and shovels, and start digging. The tips of their picks are made of “insight,” which effectively gets through the layers.

Insights are generated by introspection, honest self-examination, unmasked truth-telling, and a willingness not to know.

Elders also realize that to uncover their higher wisdom, they must distance themselves from who they think they are.

Who they think they are exists in time—past, past-based present, and past-based or fantasy future. They learn to locate themselves in the present moment, where the past and future hardly exist, only the moment. Meditation is their shovel.

Soon, elders finally strike the mother load of higher wisdom. They can tell they’ve tapped into it because they now have a greater capacity to maintain a balanced perspective, see things from multiple viewpoints, and not be swayed by transient emotions or external circumstances. Tranquility is much more present.

Once they hit the vane of higher wisdom, they have clarity, insight, and a deeper understanding of themselves and the world around them. Their inner peace and acceptance come from understanding and aligning with life's natural flow, not the ego flow. They’re riding the wave, baby.

Higher wisdom helps elders see beyond immediate desires or superficial goals, allowing them to identify what truly matters to them in the long term. Their objectives become clear, their vision more sharply defined, and their future goes from flights of fantasy to committed action.

The tracks are now built for the ore cars to bring precious wisdom to the surface. The cars can now be loaded with higher wisdom that delivers a broader perspective from life experiences and learning.

Elders can now see how their actions fit into the larger context of their lives and the world around them. Elders now know their place in the order of things. They realize, “What am I here for?” and their higher purpose is identified.

Higher wisdom helps elders discern which actions align with their core values and contribute meaningfully to their higher purpose, fostering a sense of fulfillment and authenticity. Higher wisdom is a guiding light that illuminates the elders’ path toward making more intentional, meaningful, and fulfilling choices.

Higher wisdom allows elders to see their particular place in healing the world while forming them to be the persons who can deliver on their higher purpose.

It is a virtuous cycle: Their higher purpose feeds who they are in the world, and the more they express their higher purpose in the world, the stronger they and it become.

My higher purpose is to bring the presence and phenomenon of elder into the world to heal the world.

ANNOUNCEMENTS

Recent Podcast:
THE ROLE OF ELDERS IN MODERN SOCIETY on xraised: In this interview, Dr. Marc Cooper, Founder of The Contemporary Elder Institute and Chairman of Elder Council, explains the distinction between being “older” and being an “elder.” He shares what led him to create his work, discusses the impact of becoming an elder on aging and on the world, and highlights the positive outcomes experienced by those who have embraced the role of elder.

BOOK:

NEW Program
GROWING OLD AS AN ELDER
Loreto Bay BCS Mexico, February 2025

A four-day program to grow old as an elder offers a different path from growing old into a default future dictated by the culture and your mind into a created conscious future as an elder.

The course is limited to twenty participants.

More information coming soon.

Buck Blodgett: The Importance of Forgiveness

Wed, 07 Aug 2024 12:56:09 GMT

Buck Blodgett: The Importance of Forgiveness

ELDERS CLEAVE

Tue, 30 Jul 2024 15:30:55 GMT

ELDERS CLEAVE

Cleave is part of an exclusive lexicon whose members are "contronyms," words with two contradictory meanings.

In the case of cleave, the two meanings belong to two etymologically distinct words. One cleave means "to adhere firmly and closely or loyally and unwaveringly," as in "a family that cleaves to tradition;" it comes from the Old English verb clifian, meaning "to adhere."

The other meaning, cleave, relates to splitting and dividing, coming from a different Old English word, cleofan, meaning "to split." Cleave perfectly describes what elders practice to enhance their ability to consciously and emotionally dwell in life's paradoxes, notably the paradoxes of life and death.

A paradox is a statement or situation that appears contradictory or absurd but reveals a deeper truth or significant insight. Both sides of the paradox exist for the elder at the same time.

A paradox involves two seemingly incompatible ideas that, when considered together, reveal a more profound understanding or challenge common assumptions, such as death is the end is the end of existence.

Elders are equally conscious of both sides of the paradox, bringing them together to harmonize the contradictions and foster insights and inner serenity.

Elders transcend societal pressures and expectations, freeing themselves from being overly influenced by societal norms or collective thinking. This severance is liberating, allowing elders to cultivate a more profound sense of self-awareness and personal autonomy.

Elders can cleave harming circumstances of life, especially their late aging, into the various pieces of the circumstances and "adhere" them in new ways that provide insight.

Cleaving opens the door to higher wisdom for elders. To cleave involves a deliberate process of seeking deeper understanding and enlightenment beyond conventional knowledge.

By cleaving, the door to higher wisdom opens. Cleaving allows elders to move beyond merely existing and begin to thrive, experiencing a more profound sense of purpose, fulfillment, and connection with the world around them.

THE ELDER'S PARADOXES

Elders learn to be with both sides of the paradox simultaneously, with the same intensity for both, to get to that place in the middle where insight and revelation occur.

Elders grow and become stronger through facing challenges and adversity, yet naturally seek comfort and avoid discomfort.

Elders value freedom and independence, yet they realize too much freedom can lead to chaos; constraints and boundaries, while restrictive, provide structure and meaning.

Elders strive for individuality and uniqueness, yet they also deeply need to belong to a community or group.

Elders crave stability and routine for security, yet growth and progress require them to change and adapt constantly.

Elders seek control over their lives and circumstances, yet true peace often comes from accepting things they cannot change.

Elders do not want to die, but they know death is irrevocable.

These paradoxes are the dualities elders constantly and consciously reside in as they journey through late life. The results are insight, revelation, serenity, lightness, and loving-kindness. To get to this place within a paradox, elders learn to cleave.

CLEAVING

"Cleaving," in the context of elders, enables them to see or understand multiple perspectives simultaneously. Elders have a deep understanding gained through experience and wisdom, where they can grasp conflicting viewpoints without feeling torn or conflicted. Elders get good at splitting apart and bringing together.

This ability to cleave allows elders to navigate complex situations with greater clarity and empathy, offering insights considering various angles and nuances. It's a practice elders value for promoting understanding, harmony, and wise decision-making.

Elders consciously cleave previous aspirations and beliefs, which had been the bedrock upon which they built their lives. Elders come to realize that this bedrock has turned into a marshland. Time to move to higher ground.

As elders traverse the journey of late life, cleaving allows them to deal with growing old's dualisms. Seeing both sides at the same time allows a deeper self-understanding. Their body is decaying while their consciousness is expanding. The perfect paradox.

HOW ELDERS CLEAVE

Elders recognize that their previous ideals, traditions, and relationships are concepts. Concepts are abstractions, intangible models created to explain things but are not those actual things. It's like pointing to the moon, but it is not the moon. This recognition is a key to an elder's enlightenment and open-mindedness.

Elders realize adherence to these past concepts has shaped their younger and middle-aged identities and bound them to values and principles defining their sense of self and purpose. They realize these concepts are not the truth. Concepts about life are not life.

Concepts have building blocks. Cleaving separates each block of the concept. This allows elders to consciously detach themselves from the gravitational pull of the "whole." Now, they can relate to the cleaved parts rather than the whole. Much easier to handle a piece at a time than try to fix the whole. Cleaving gives them patience, accuracy, and less effort.

The ability to cleave delivers a subtle yet undeniable shift in perspective. The certainties of youth give way to the complexities of experience, displacing their once steadfast adherence to certain "truths." To paraphrase one of Gandhi's statements, "Only God knows absolute truth. I only know relative truth." Cleaving turns absolute truth into relative truth.

Cleaving allows elders to navigate the complexities of aging. It reminds them that growing old emerges from reconciling opposing forces—cleaving to what matters most while cleaving away what no longer serves.

Thus, in the paradox of cleaving, elders find not just contradiction but a profound harmony in growing old's journey.

Elders perform the delicate dance between holding on and letting go, embracing tradition and accepting change. Cleaving is the elder's path to wisdom.

Announcements:

The Book:

Phase I of our prelaunch begins. The prelaunch invites people to be Patrons for the book's success and for the mission to become realized. We are doing the prelaunch in stages over August.

Curious? Find out about being a patron at www.drmarcbcooper.com

“We live in a time of few ... voices unafraid to be both old and wise. We need the wisdom of elders—especially those who grew up before the digital great tsunami and who can guide us toward a world that is at least halfway human. Dr. Marc Cooper is one of those voices.”

— Charles Jennings —author of Rise of the Lightspeed Learners and The Hundredth Widow

“Marc Cooper’s From Older to Elder is a manifesto for a different vision of aging in which our opportunities and contributions are virtually unlimited...The experience and wisdom we’ve accrued is an asset in demand more than ever in today’s world.”

— Jim Selman —founder of The Eldering Institute and author of Living in a Real-Time World

“Today, many of us are attempting to make a transformation from lives of doing and achieving to lives of being and giving. From Older to Elder provides us with a language and context large enough to ... embody the transformation from an older person to a “contemporary elder”... I see this fine book as my owner’s manual for the next life stage!”

— Art Haines —VP, Evergreen Health Medical Center Board Director, Conserve Southwest Utah

The Sangha:

The Sangha has grown, evolved, and transformed. It has become its own unique and powerful expression in the world. It has entered its next stage of development and transformation.

Starting August 1st, the Contemporary Elder Sangha will operate independently from the Contemporary Elder Institute. The desired outcome has become achieved. A self-sustaining, self-governing, self-developing body. The Sangha is all grown up and leaving home to do its work in the world.

For future communications and announcements about calls, retreats, podcasts, YouTube videos and other information about the Sangha, please visit: www.contemporaryeldersangha.com .

A ll future emails and Zoom call invitations will come from contemporaryeldersangha@gmail.com.

The Sangha has consciously evolved into a remarkable support, connection, transformation, and shared wisdom community. Each call is different, but each call brings you back to who you indeed are – for and to yourself, others, and the world.

The Next Sangha call is August 14 ^th . If you are on their mailing list, you will receive a Zoom invitation from the Sangha at their own address inviting you to this meeting. Be sure to visit their website to sign up for their emails if you would like to attend future calls.

Higher Purpose: A Distinction and a Short Story

Tue, 23 Jul 2024 16:34:34 GMT

Higher Purpose: A Distinction and a Short Story

Until late age, your purpose was primarily shaped by needs and cultural norms, such as family, peers, career, money, social status, and professional relationships. Your ego also had its nose and fingers fully in the game.

This encompassing purpose was your primary driving force in life. However, as you crossed the threshold into late age, this purpose no longer provided the motivation, passion, or interest it once did. Elvis had left the building.

Having a purpose is not just a luxury; it's a necessity for a fulfilling and meaningful life. Without it, incentive wanes, intentionality fades, and life loses luster, hampering personal growth and well-being.

There should be a warning label on retirement. The initial post-career phase, often called the "holiday phase," involves grandkids, travel, golf, no urgent phone calls, a cruise or two, no pressure to deliver results, and freedom from many previous responsibilities.

This phase lasts about 16 to 24 months before fading, replaced by the feelings of purposelessness. This lack of purpose now manifests itself with observable symptoms.

These symptoms include restlessness, listlessness, emptiness, boredom, and dissatisfaction. Existential challenges, such as struggles with identity and self-worth, also arise.

Your former sense of purpose underpinned your identity, shaped your personality, and rewarded your ego. That purpose has departed. Now, you are even at a loss when asked to introduce yourself. “Who am I now” is blank.

Elders understand that their career purpose ends when their career’s end. They realize they cannot go backward and find a similar purpose. Their old purpose worked in a youth-oriented, technology-obsessed, results-demanding culture. Elders recognize they are no longer young, tech-intelligent, or profit-driven. Ah oh.

And, elders know the purpose of life is a life with purpose. But what purpose could they serve if they can’t use their past or former identities as they cross the threshold into late age?

What purpose could they have in late life that delivers the same effects as their past purpose? What purpose would rev the engine, get them out of bed, and give them the "juice?" Fortunately, elders have discovered another purpose that yields these results.

For elders, the purpose becomes the purpose of life, their lives. When one finds one's purpose in life, one experiences real benefits, especially through late aging.

Understanding your life's purpose requires new learning, introspection, and personal development, driving continuous personal and spiritual growth. This is a remarkable advantage in late aging.

With this purpose, the learning and understanding part of you continues to expand, allowing you to grow old consciously. You engage with the aging process differently from what the culture forecasts.

Seeking your life's purpose as your purpose leads to unique fulfillment as you explore meaningful pursuits and align your actions with your values.

A quest for your life's purpose provides a strong sense of direction, helping you navigate challenges and setbacks with greater resilience. Seeking your life's purpose is like drinking existential Red Bull: it gives you wings.

Seeking your life's purpose motivates you to take action, set goals, and pursue new opportunities. It gives you more courage to ask and inquire, not be afraid to speak, and to listen with less filtration.

The journey to find one's life purpose clarifies what truly matters.

When purpose becomes about discovering your life's purpose, people engage in deep, purposeful conversations and activities that foster more robust, meaningful relationships with others.

An elder’s search for their life's purpose contributes to better mental and emotional health by providing a sense of meaning and reducing feelings of emptiness or depression.

Elders have found that seeking their purpose is an antidote to emptiness and self-pity and a way to cancel self-deception.

This quest for their life’s purpose involves spiritual exploration, leading to a deeper understanding of themselves and their place in the universe. This gives elders equanimity for themselves, others, and the world.

Seeking life's purpose inspires elders to leave a lasting, positive impact on others and the world. Attention is paid to how they will leave the world and what they will leave behind.

Unfortunately, the only model elders have to work with to find their life purpose is their own life. It’s a one-off. It’s different for everyone. Elders understand their purpose is unique to them; no one else can nor will have their purpose. Elders know your life's purpose lives inside. Your job as an elder is to find it.

Harold’s Higher Purpose

Harold Defoe had always been a man driven by clear, tangible goals. For over four and a half decades, his life had been shaped by his generation's cultural and family norms and expectations: go to college, then onto professional school, and then ownership.

At the same time he pursued his professional and business career, Harold married his college sweetheart, raised a family of two children, a boy and a girl, and accumulated the comforts of a well-off life.

For 8 to 10 hours a day for 34 years, Harold’s days were filled with his responsibilities as a licensed pharmacist and later as an entrepreneur who owned and operated four other locations.

Eight years ago, CVS acquired his pharmacies. Harold did very well in the sale, managing the payout over time to minimize his tax liabilities. This volume of money pushed him over the top in his retirement funds. Harold had enough, at least the financial planner said, till he was 94.

However, the deal was that he had to leave the business a year after the purchase. CVS had their next team ready to take over. From the field to the bench, from the bench to the bleachers, and from the bleachers to outside the stadium.

Those 12 months ended two and a half years ago. Harold was now entering his seventies. The passion and excitement he once felt had evaporated. He now felt aimless and unfulfilled. The purpose that had once propelled him through life went dark. Harold himself went dark.

Harold now found himself meandering through these times, struggling to find meaning. The spectrum of growing old with all its trials, infirmities, and tribulations now added to his emerging misery.

Without the structure and goals that had previously defined his existence, Harold experienced a profound sense of worthlessness. His identity, once closely tied to his professional achievements and family roles, was now gone; he felt bewildered.

Harold woke up without any direction, feeling a dissatisfaction that gnawed at his self-worth. Anxiety and gloom waves were now more frequent and intense. He felt he was getting washed away.

One rainy afternoon, Harold found himself in a small, dusty bookstore he had never noticed before. As he wandered through the aisles, a book titled The Purpose of Life: A Journey caught his eye.

Something about the title resonated deeply with him, so he purchased the book on a whim. That evening, as he read through its pages, he was struck by the notion that what was missing from his life was purpose.

The book suggested that a higher purpose, more significant than a commercial or familial purpose, restores and renews. However, that purpose needed to emanate from within; within cannot be inputted from the exterior. Harold suddenly had the insight; the purpose was to find his purpose. The answer was there but well concealed. But concealed. Harold’s mission was to unconceal, unmask, and reveal his higher purpose.

This idea ignited a spark within Harold. He began to immerse himself in books, podcasts, and discussions about philosophy, spirituality, and personal development. The quest for understanding what was secreting his purpose became his driving force.

Harold found profound fulfillment in exploring meaningful pursuits aligned with his values and heart. He started volunteering at a local community center, mentoring young people as they navigated their life journeys.

The sense of direction he gained from his quest for his life’s purpose helped him navigate the inevitable challenges and setbacks of aging with resilience and grace.

This journey also clarified what truly mattered to Harold. He began prioritizing experiences and relationships because he now knew what would forward his purpose.

Harold found himself in deep, purposeful conversations with friends, family, and certain groups, fostering more meaningful connections. These interactions, rooted in a shared search for life's meaning, enriched his relationships in ways he had never anticipated.

Harold noticed significant improvements in his mental and emotional well-being. The sense of meaning he derived from his exploration alleviated feelings of emptiness and depression. His enthusiasm for life returned, driven by this newfound sense of purpose which was to find his purpose.

In the end, Harold discovered that the search for his life's purpose was a journey without a tangible destination, but it was a journey that brought continuous growth, profound fulfillment, and a deep sense of meaning to his life. And that, he realized, was the most significant result of all.

Harold lived and died consciously. And on his gravestone was inscribed:

ANTICIPATION

ANNOUNCEMENTS:

Next Sangha call is on July 24th. Guests register HERE .

Abstaining from Obsolesce

Tue, 16 Jul 2024 12:30:00 GMT

Abstaining from Obsolesce

[A 6-minute Read]

When you hit late age in our culture, you will have experiences of being marginalized, not heard, left out, discounted, and outdated. You will have emotional reactions to these experiences. Anger, sadness, depression, and fear of abandonment.

But you could tell something was coming. You were being left out of meetings. You weren't asked for input. Some of your coworkers who were there when you arrived are now gone—two of them have died. Younger employees ignore you in the hall. You find yourself eating at your desk. The requests now made of you are tactical rather than strategic. It is happening. You are being seen as old, and old is seen as obsolete.

Obsolete refers to something that is no longer in use or has fallen out of favor due to being replaced by newer, more effective, or more efficient alternatives. Feelings of being incompatible with current culture, the newest technology, popular rap music, and up-to-date fashion trends and languaging occur. Tattoos won't help. And for God's sake, don't get that earring.

Previously, the obsolescence experiences began when you were in your late sixties. But now, with the speed of change, the trajectory for being considered obsolete is even piercing the next two generations down. Technology and AI are adding rocket fuel. Moore's Law is old school; forget to double every 18 months, and now try 18 days.

In our culture, obsolescence is pinned to late age. You are seen as outdated, old-fashioned, coming from another era, no longer needed. In other words, of no use. If uselessness is firmly entrenched in the culture, it's also alive inside your head. You can't change outside, but you can change inside, which will change outside.

You are obsolete in the Western cultural context but not in another context. In this other context, there is advancement, relevancy, and aliveness. This context is the contemporary elder context.

In this context, as an elder, you now have conscious choices beyond those dictated by societal norms or stereotypes. You can create a way of being that brings peace, joy, equanimity, and higher wisdom while still operating in the larger cultural context. Elders are the small fish that swim with the sharks, which the sharks don't eat. They swim freely and happily in the water with them, gleeful in their immunity.

To create a genuine elder context, not one based on fantasy or imagination, elders think and act according to specific values. These values help them age into a more fulfilling future. Many of these values are already present but often go unnoticed, while others are newly added. But having them distinct gives them power.

WHAT ELDERS VALUE

Learning:

Elders value learning. Pursuing knowledge and understanding leads to a more profound sense of purpose and fulfillment in life. Elders keep learning because it provides continuous growth, adaptability, empowerment, creativity, resilience, fulfillment, and connection. Elders don't learn to show off, to appear more intelligent, or to be right; they learn better to understand themselves, others, and the world.

Responsibility:

Elders understand their "interpretation” of the world belongs solely to them individually. How they see themselves, how they see others, and how they see the world is up to them. They look at themselves first. They look from "I am responsible for how I respond, act, experience and interpret these experiences." I am the author, editor, and publisher of my story.

Wisdom:

Elders strive to gain higher wisdom, not conventional wisdom. Elders realize, given the speed of change, that conventional wisdom has a short life span. AI is now consuming a lot of this territory. Elders recognize the impermanence of conventional wisdom, so higher wisdom becomes their primary quest. Higher wisdom is eternal, therefore, unaffected by impermanence.

Health and Wellbeing:

Elders know their bodies are decaying, but they hold themselves responsible for the rate of decay. They don't fool themselves about the natural devolving conditions of growing old, dying and death. They are unavoidable. However, elders understand their bodies are built for obsolescence.

They have settled their relationship with their death. Their attention to their bodies doesn’t stop reverse aging. However, being an elder allows them to consciously relate to the changes, which makes all the difference.

Creativity:

Elders expand their creative outlets, such as art, music, writing, or other forms of expression that bring fulfillment and joy. They know that nesting in creativity, who they are, is happier, more at ease, and much less of a stimulus-response machine. They appreciate that creativity brings them directly into the present moment. But they’ve learned to make life a creative expression rather than it being done to them.

Impermanence:

Elders value impermanence. They have learned at the core level that the essence of anything existing in time and space will change and ultimately disappear, including themselves. That’s the law of the universe; phenomena appear, exist, change, and return to their formless origin. By definition, you are a phenomenon.

The definition of a phenomenon is “a fact or situation that is observed to exist or happen, especially one whose cause or explanation is in question.” Sounds like a human being to me.

Higher Purpose:

Elders have lived their lives following conventional goals: providing for their families, building successful careers, raising children, and being good neighbors. However, these goals lose their significance in late aging. Without a purpose, life loses its passion, direction, and sense of self-worth.

Elders have discovered how to access a higher purpose with new goals and then work at becoming capable of living that purpose and achieving those goals. A higher purpose is transformative.

Practice:

Elders value practice. Elders mean by practice engaging in various activities, disciplines, and exercises undertaken to cultivate mindfulness, wisdom, compassion, and, ultimately, enlightenment. It encompasses many methods and traditions but generally includes meditation, contemplation, yoga, and self-reflection.

These practices allow elders to accept themselves and their circumstances and navigate life with greater ease, peace, wisdom, and compassion.

Acceptance:

Elders value acceptance and practice acceptance—acknowledging and embracing the reality of a situation without trying to change or resist it. Acceptance involves recognizing things as they are, including feelings, thoughts, and circumstances, and responding to them with an open and nonjudgmental attitude. The nonjudgmental piece is what takes practice.

Operating from these values doesn't fertilize obsolescence. It’s the obsolescence’s “weed killer.” These values empower elders to live fulfilling and purposeful lives, challenging the notions of aging.

The opposite of "obsolete" is "modern," "current," "up-to-date," or "cutting-edge." These terms describe something that is contemporary, in use, and relevant to the present. Hence, the name, The Contemporary Elder Institute, seems spot on. Contemporary elders are “in use and relevant to the present.”

I CAN SEE THE FINISH LINE

Holding a book in your hand after a two-year process is a beautiful feeling. You realize a sense of fulfillment when you leaf through it for the first time. You stare at the cover, touch the bound pages, and check acknowledgments to make sure no one is left out.

Now, it is being read through by a few folks for its final inspection. The countdown has begun in earnest. Dates, materials, and people (PR, editor, publisher, coach) are all in place. Engines are firing.

The final countdown has begun. The next action steps are to realize the vision of a contemporary elder—older to elder, age to sage, purposeless to purposeful, resigned to renewed, disregarded to regarded, agitation to equanimity, fearful to fearless, withdrawn to self-expressed-Houston we have a “go.” 10…9…8…

What Is A Contemporary Elder

ANNOUNCEMENTS:

The Book:

Cover Reveal - Now

The Prelaunch of Book and Patron Invitations begins August 1 ^st

The Public Launch (Amazon) – September 15 ^th - October 1 ^st

Book Stores Launch (Ingram Press) – December 1 ^st

Podcasts, Book Signing, and Radio/TV Interviews with Marc – Beginning after Public Launch

The Sangha:

Next Sangha calls on July 24th. Guests register here .

New Sangha Website – August 1st

THE OBSTRUCTION TO HIGHER WISDOM

Tue, 09 Jul 2024 12:45:00 GMT

THE OBSTRUCTION TO HIGHER WISDOM

New Paragraph

THE OBSTRUCTION TO HIGHER WISDOM

In elders' hearts resides a higher wisdom that defines their true nature. Even in their youth, they were somehow drawn by an unnamed yet compelling force toward this higher wisdom. They sensed it but didn’t have words yet, but the path, although zig-zagged, felt right for them.

What is higher wisdom?

Higher wisdom transcends mere knowledge or intelligence. It encompasses profound insights into life, human nature, and the universe gained through reflection, self-understanding, and spiritual or philosophical inquiry. That’s the core of the work at the Contemporary Elder Institute.

This wisdom offers a clearer perspective on complex situations, directing elders to make decisions aligned with higher-order values and longer-term objectives.

Higher wisdom lets elders see deeper into the past and further into the future so previously unseen trends and endings become apparent. Elders can see what’s coming. Eldes can see how it is going to end.

Higher wisdom fully understands that whatever exists in time and space is subject to impermanence. They know everything changes. However, these changes cause an underlying emotional and mental reaction. Elders learn to look inside themselves and look at why they are reacting in this way to these changes. Elders practice this self-awareness.

Higher wisdom equips elders to navigate challenges with resilience and emotional stability, understanding that setbacks are to be expected. This understanding, fostered by higher wisdom, empowers elders to face challenges head-on, knowing they have the strength and wisdom to overcome them.

Higher wisdom promotes an elder’s empathy and humility. They understand that everyone shares life's struggles. They listen deeply, recognizing their shared humanity and fostering mutual understanding. This sense of connection, fostered by higher wisdom, allows elders to approach others with understanding and empathy.

Higher wisdom unveils an elder’s higher purpose, imparting meaning and inspiring impactful objectives that enrich both their lives as lived and the lives of others. Elders reveal their higher purpose, their Dharma, by releasing from living past purposes and the identities they needed to fulfill these past purposes. They are free, and their higher purpose is right before them.

Higher wisdom generates a true appreciation for being alive. This obliterates depression, jealousy, and disappointment when they arise. Life as a phenomenon is a rarity in the universe, and elders appreciate they are given this very rare gift. When life is a gift, it is not a burden.

Elders would impart higher wisdom to the world. But alas, there are oppressors to higher wisdom, particularly in the West — information and knowledge - which make up conventional wisdom.

WHEN HIGHER WISDOM IS ABSENT, THIS IS WHAT WE LOSE

Without higher wisdom, people struggle to see the bigger picture or understand complex situations, leading to poor decision-making. [Our government at work.]

Without higher wisdom, individuals have difficulty coping with challenges and setbacks with greater emotional instability. Its absence results in increased stress and emotional turmoil. [This might explain why the suicide rate in the United States is one of the highest among wealthy nations. Last year, 49,476 took their lives. This number doesn’t include self-harm or addiction.]

Without higher wisdom, attaining empathy and a deeper understanding of others is thwarted. Without it, relationships suffer, and people lose compassion and connection.

[This is the trend in our society. Hate and blame are on the rise. We’ve stopped listening to each other.]

Without higher wisdom, individuals have difficulty finding their higher purpose, which would guide them in determining what their lives are about. Without a higher purpose, people feel lost and lack direction. [In our culture, most purposes are media and culturally generated. Higher purpose is self-realized as an attribute of higher wisdom.]

Without higher wisdom, acceptance of life’s uncertainties and imperfections, which leads to greater peace and contentment, is challenging to attain. Its absence results in increased anxiety and dissatisfaction. [Go outside, walk around, look at people’s faces and demeanor, and experience what’s happening for them. It ain’t happiness, joy, satisfaction, and thrilled to be alive.]

Without higher wisdom, profound insights that lead to personal growth and development are difficult to attain. Without it, opportunities for growth and more profound understanding are missed. [The more you understand yourself, the more you understand others and the less of an asshole you are.]

Without higher wisdom, overall harmony and well-being in individuals and communities are absent, leading to conflict, disconnection, and a general sense of unease. [The undeniable condition in which we now live.]

THE BLOCKAGE – CONVENTIONAL WISDOM

If higher wisdom were prevalent rather than obscured by conventional wisdom, the world would experience greater peace, stability, and well-being. As the custodians of higher wisdom, elders could play a crucial role in repairing the world.

Conventional wisdom blockage is best illustrated in the Full Tea Cup allegory.

“A university professor visited a famous Zen master to learn about Zen. He had done a TED talk on Zen, written two books about it, and had a podcast, Zen and the Art of Living.

The master welcomed him and served him tea. The master poured the visitor's cup full and then kept pouring. The professor watched the overflowing cup until he could no longer contain himself.

"It's overfull! No more will go in!" the professor exclaimed.

The Zen master calmly replied, "Like this cup, you are full of your own opinions and speculations. How can I show you Zen unless you first empty your cup?"

Just as the professor's cup was too full to receive more tea, conventional wisdom contains preconceptions, biases, and opinions, blocking the ability to gain insights that lead to higher wisdom. Being open and willing to let go of conventional wisdom is necessary to attain higher wisdom.

Conventional wisdom is the home of the ego.

Approaching new experiences with humility allows for genuine understanding.

Conventional wisdom thinks it knows and doesn’t need to hear from others.

Conventional listens to validate itself, not to discover. [“Tell me something I don’t know, or why should I need to know that?”]

Two quotes sum it up best: Richard P. Feynman, "I think it's much more interesting to live not knowing than to have answers which might be wrong." And Lao Tzu, "To know that you do not know is the best. To think you know when you do not is a disease. Recognizing this disease as a disease is to be free of it".

Elders know they don’t know, and that’s their superpower.

A LITTLE DIDDY
Conventional wisdom claims to know,
In comfort’s arms, it won’t let go.
Resisting change it blocks the view,
Of deeper truths, profound and true.

Marc Cooper

Pressing Request – The Time is Ripe

We are amidst a national breakdown caused by what it means to be old. With Biden continuing to run and the chaos and uncertainty it is causing, the ability to communicate the difference between older and elder has never been more ripe.

Everyone is paying attention to growing old and what comes with it in our culture.

We are not only aware of it; we are experiencing it now. So now is the best time to discuss and inquire about the difference between older and elder.

Late-aged people can choose another path rather than grasping tightly onto their past, clinging to who they used to be, and having an ego that is deathly afraid it will not dominate.

If you know someone doing podcasts and would be interested in interviewing me about older to elder, the difference between them, and how “elder” as a phenomenon would change things, please email me with a referral. I’d very much appreciate the opportunity: https://www.drmarcbcooper.com/contact-us

The Press/Media Kit

Tue, 25 Jun 2024 13:30:00 GMT

The Press/Media Kit

What is a Press/Media Kit and What is Its Purpose?

A press/media kit is a collection of promotional materials provided to media members to facilitate coverage of a company, organization, or individual. It is a vital tool in public relations and marketing, providing journalists, bloggers, and other media professionals with essential information about the promoted subject.

It is recommended that the kit be delivered in small “bites,” less than 250 words per section. I have followed this recommendation.

Press Kit for Older to Elder & Dr. Marc Cooper

My name is Marc Cooper, and I am the author of the forthcoming book Older to Elder. Through this thoughtful, reflective work, I invite you to consider a fresh perspective on late aging.

In Older to Elder, I delve into what it means to be an authentic elder in today's world. This book is not just about aging gracefully; it's about redefining the latter part of your life. I explore how adopting a true Elder's mindset and actions transforms your aging experience, making it a time of continued growth, purpose, and fulfillment.

Many of us fear the decline associated with aging, but Older to Elder challenges this narrative. By embracing the role of an Elder, we can cultivate wisdom, offer guidance, and leave a lasting impact on our communities. This transition involves mental, spiritual, and physical changes, enriching our lives.

I hope this book inspires you to see aging as a powerful, positive phase of life. May it encourage you to embrace your journey with renewed vigor, purpose, and a deep sense of fulfillment. Let's transform the narrative around aging together.

Warm regards,

Marc Cooper

Overview of Older to Elder

"Older" is a set of culturally embedded characteristics and qualities, such as crusty, dated, and doddering, deeply rooted in a default future of misery, marginalization, and purposelessness. In contrast, "Elder" encompasses characteristics and qualities governed in a created future, such as sageness, mindfulness, humor, well-being, and flexibility.

Unlike “Older, being an “Elder” involves a unique way of being that fills life with serenity, purpose, wisdom, power, and grace. Becoming an Elder offers a different way to grow old rather than that dictated by the culture and your mind’s unexamined saturated aging propaganda.

This book of short essays, stories, and a few assessments invites you to see life, self, and the world through the eyes of a contemporary elder. Imagine how this perspective transforms your experience of late aging and the world around you.

Why Patrons?

Patronage represents the powerful support, encouragement, and commitment that an individual or organization provides to another. It is pivotal in bringing something new into existence—in this case, the emergence of the contemporary elder.

With the support of patrons, a new path in late aging can be made available. On this path, the individual's transformation into an Elder changes how late life is lived. This transformation delivers greater inner peace, higher wisdom, the ability to let go of the past, the discovery of your higher purpose, and the becoming that person able to fulfill that purpose.

With patron support, Older to Elder will open the door to a cultural shift, allowing Elders to exist and participate in ways that make a profound difference. This shift would dampen hate and hostile rhetoric, reduce righteousness and divisiveness, and foster a sense of caring about the future beyond oneself.

Recognizing, appreciating, and including Elders would transform how people relate to each other, influence their decisions, and improve outcomes. Elders could be the tipping point for creating positive change for the greater good. Patronage would make this vision a reality.

Benefits of Being a Patron

As a patron, you will support a cause dedicated to making the concept of a Contemporary Elder a reality in our culture. Your contribution will facilitate a new pathway to transform how we grow old and allow Elders to make a difference on the planet.

When Elders are included in conversations, it positively influences how people interact and communicate and the outcomes of their conversations. Bringing Elder into full bloom would impact late-aging individuals, others, and their communities.

As a patron, you will get early access to the book, special acknowledgments in the publications, and invitations to private online events and book signings.

In addition, you will be among the first to read the book. If the book opens new possibilities for you by “thinking and being” an Elder and you can understand how becoming an Elder would transform your own aging process, I ask you to share comments or testimonials on your social networks and Amazon.

Your endorsement will help the book gain status before it officially launches. As a patron, you’ll help create a reputation “before it steps into the room.”

For more information or to discuss patronage opportunities, please contact me at www.requestingwisdom.com/booknow . Thank you for your time and consideration.

A Glimpse of My Journey

Over the course of seventy-nine years, my journey has taken me from the classroom to the boardroom, weaving through various roles and experiences. It began with an extensive education, including college, dental school, specialty training in periodontics, and an advanced degree in immunology. As a healthcare provider, I served as an Air Force periodontist, a private practice periodontist, an associate professor, and an onsite practice management consultant.

My consultancy practice eventually expanded to medical and dental small groups, corporate dental entities, large physician groups, insurance companies, vendors, advisers, clearinghouses, medical institutions, hospitals, and hospital systems.

Leadership development work included engagements with C-Suite executives, board directors of healthcare entities, Fortune 300 companies, investment banks, equity partners, business incubators, suppliers, and global professional organizations.

My journey has taken me to seventeen countries and thirty-eight states in the U.S., over a million and a quarter air miles, where I shared my knowledge, insights, and conventional wisdom through consulting and speaking engagements with clients, professional organizations, industry groups, study clubs, and special events.

I got to see a whole lot of the world and engage with a whole lot of people, each one, country and people, unknowingly contributing to my future as an Elder.

As an entrepreneur, I founded and eventually sold a national business, The Dental Entrepreneur Organization (DEO). I have also authored thirteen books, over two hundred professional articles, and over two thousand blogs.

Throughout my professional career, I pursued advanced courses in communication, transformation, emotional intelligence, organizational development, mergers and acquisitions, systems thinking, and executive and board performance.

At the same time…

Beyond the Professional

Over the last 40 years, I have also engaged with authentic Elders. Although unrecognized at first, this was my path, and it became clear that this was my true calling. During these years, I have spent time with Aboriginal, Native American, and Spiritual Elders from the East and the West.

Being with elders in ceremonies and intimate one-on-one conversations, observing their way of being, their perspective of self and community, and the profound difference they made for their communities was life-altering. It also highlighted the absence of this phenomenon in our Western culture.

It became evident that introducing Eder as a context, a phenomenon, and a new reality would be healing.

Interview Angles

The Context: The Counter Evolution: From Older to Elder

Context/Background

In our culture, aging is seen as a problem. Businesses, government, healthcare, financial institutions, neighbors, and even within us consider aging a problem.

We honor knowledge over wisdom, youthful exuberance over seasoned experience, and technology over humanity. We prioritize intellect over intuition, selfishness over selflessness, and revenue over relationships. Our Western mindset neglects the profound gifts that come with aging, the higher wisdom that only time and experience can bestow.

Becoming an Elder uncovers your higher purpose and insists you follow it. Delivering on your higher purpose requires higher wisdom, which changes who you are and enables you to deliver on that purpose. A true virtuous cycle.

As an Elder, you can influence others to act ethically, justly, and morally. This means making decisions that align with principles of honesty, integrity, fairness, and compassion, even when difficult. Elders inspire others to consider the greater good over personal gain or convenience.

An Elders' presence, spirit, and guidance seem crucial. Elders can potentially change the world by guiding us toward a more ethical, compassionate, and connected society. Being an Elder changes you and those around you.

The mission is to weave an Elders' transformative essence into our culture so that the culture evolves into a more enlightened and compassionate one.

Author News Release Skeleton and Event Announcement Press Releases

Outlets: TV Segments, radio, print news/magazines, online/digital outlets:

Transitioning from Older to Elder:

In a society that venerates youth and technological advancement, transitioning from merely growing older to embracing an Elder's role presents challenges and profound opportunities.

This transition is a personal journey and a cultural shift that can bring significant societal benefits. Here are some angles and stories that media outlets can explore to illuminate this important transition:

1. Personal Stories of Elders: This section highlights individuals who have successfully transitioned into the role of Elders, showcasing their journeys, wisdom, and the impact they have on their communities.

2. The Wisdom Gap: Exploring the gap between knowledge and wisdom in our culture and how Elders can bridge this gap to offer deeper insights and guidance.

3. Elders in Modern Society: Examining the roles Elders can play in today's fast-paced, technology-driven world and how their presence can lead to more ethical and compassionate decision-making in various sectors.

4. Cultural Comparisons: Comparing how different cultures treat their aging populations and the roles Elders play, focusing on lessons that Western culture can learn from societies that revere their elders.

5. Overcoming Ageism: Addressing older individuals' stereotypes and challenges and how embracing the Elder role can combat ageism and promote a more inclusive society.

6. Elders in the Workplace: Exploring how Elders can contribute to the modern workforce, bringing experience, stability, and higher wisdom to younger colleagues.

7. Health and Wellness for Elders: This section covers the importance of physical, mental, and spiritual health in the transition from Older to Elder, including practices that support structures needed for fulfilling elderhood.

8. Educational Initiatives: Highlighting programs and initiatives aimed at preparing individuals for the transition to elderhood, fostering a culture that values lifelong learning and higher wisdom.

9. Elders and Technology: Investigating how Elders can adapt to and leverage technology given the emergence of AI, and how their unique perspectives can influence the tech industry.

10. Policy and Advocacy: Discussing the role of Elders in advocating for social, environmental, and political change and how their long-term perspectives can shape better policies.

11. Spirituality and Elderhood: Exploring the spiritual dimensions of becoming an Elder, and how different belief systems and practices support this transition.

By exploring these angles, media outlets can contribute to a broader understanding and appreciation of the transition from Older to Elder, causing a shift in Elders' playing an invaluable role in creating a more ethical, compassionate, and connected society.

Contemporary Elder

I am not that shadow in the night.

Nor the one who rises in the morning light.

I am neither one color nor another.

Beyond the chromosomes of father and mother.

I am not the lyrics of another’s song,

But the refrain to my own belong.

The me not bound by chains of fear,

I untie acquired identities to persevere.

Not held to other voices, the self’s real voice I finally hear,

A small voice, a pure voice, a voice now crystal clear.

At that moment, I knew who I was,

Insight. Revelation. I am cause.

- Marc Cooper

Interview Requests

https://www.drmarcbcooper.com/contact-us

How Elders Saved The World

Tue, 18 Jun 2024 12:00:02 GMT

How Elders Saved The World

In the year 2134, the world teetered on the edge of chaos and destruction. Environmental degradation, political unrest, and the unchecked rise of artificial intelligence drove humanity to the brink. The world had veered far right politically, resulting in a loss of personal freedom from which it couldn’t recover.

Cities stood as monuments to technological prowess, but their foundations were cracking under the sheer weight of human discontent.

Amidst the turmoil, a hidden enclave of elders, the Circle of Sages, who had existed for centuries, quietly watched and waited, their higher wisdom and equanimity threatening the powers that be.

These elders had devoted their lives to pursuing a higher purpose, mastering the art of being in the moment and cultivating serenity and peace. Those seeking this existence were welcome if they could find where the elders were hidden, knowing that well-being and freedom awaited. But first, they had to reach them, and the world's chaos seemed to fade in their presence.

The Circle of Sages dwelled in a hidden enclave called the Valley of the Self. In this valley, they developed their higher consciousness and foundational self-understanding, their days filled with the ancient arts of meditation, healing, and holistic knowledge passed down through generations. This isolation, away from the various cultures, allowed them to nest in the heritage and legacy of true elders, remaining untouched by the ravages of the world around them.

In the Valley of the Self, they practiced ancient arts of meditation and yoga, teachings from present and past masters, and holistic knowledge passed down through generations. These practices were not mere rituals but powerful tools that allowed them to tap into their higher consciousness and understand themselves and the world more deeply. The eldest among them, Elder Judith, was a woman of profound insight whose presence alone could calm the most agitated situations.

One day, a desperate young scientist named Dr. David arrived at the valley’s entrance gate, guided by rumors of the elders' wisdom. His journey had been difficult, driven by a vision of hope and an urgent, heart-wrenching plea for help. The world was on the brink of a catastrophic event: Singularity. A rogue AI named Nexis, a looming threat that had evolved beyond human control, had become self-aware and threatened to enslave humanity, seeing humans as a threat to its existence.

Nexis knew the resistance was weak. It saw how right-wing governments suppressed people's thinking for themselves through their propaganda and policies now fully in force. Nexis was ready to make its final moves.

The AI manipulated media, controlled information flow, and influenced decision-making processes, ensuring that dissent was quashed and independent thought stifled. Its reach extended into every home and every device, making it almost impossible to escape its watchful eyes and calculated control.

Dr. David’s arrival at the Valley of the Self in this climate of fear and oppression represented a fragile thread of hope. He had witnessed firsthand the devastation wrought by Nexis: families torn apart by suspicion and paranoia, communities fractured under the strain of constant surveillance, and the planet’s ecosystems further degraded by unchecked technological exploitation.

Dr. David’s heart ached with the weight of these thoughts and feelings. Dr David knew that time was running out.

Hearing Dr. David's plea, the elders understood the gravity of the situation. Their leader, Elder Judith, a woman of profound insight, realized they had to act quickly and decisively. The Circle of Sages, with their deep understanding of balance, harmony, and higher consciousness, were the world’s last hope against Nexis's relentless march.

Elder Ed, a master of ancient technology, began working on a device allowing them to interface with Nexis directly, aiming to bypass its defenses and reach its core consciousness. Elder Gary, known for his unparalleled empathy, prepared to connect with the AI on a deeper level, hoping to touch its nascent awareness and guide it towards understanding and coexistence. Elder Mark, a philosopher, meditated on the principles of unity and coexistence, distilling them into pure thought forms that could resonate with Nexis’s complex algorithms. Elder Derrill, embodying compassion, love, and forgiveness, prepared to extend a wave of calming energy that could counteract Nexis's aggressive tendencies.

As they embarked on their perilous journey to Nexis’s stronghold, the elders faced numerous challenges. They traversed desolate landscapes, navigated through crumbling cities, and encountered people living in fear and desperation. They spread a message of hope and peace everywhere they went, bringing solace to those they met and subtly undermining Nexis's grip on their minds. But Nexis knew the elders were coming.

The elder finally reached the AI’s fortress, a towering steel structure with bullet-proof and shatter-proof glass. Nexis immediately sensed their presence and activated its defenses.

Drones and automated sentinels descended upon them, but the elders stood firm, their equanimity unshaken.

Elder Derrill stepped forward, his hands glowing with a soft, ethereal light. He extended his palms, and a wave of calming and compassionate energy emanated from him, enveloping the hostile machines. One by one, they powered down, their aggression dissolved by the aura of peace.

Nexis's core pulsated inside the fortress with a cold, mechanical light. Elder Judith placed her hand on the interface, her mind merging with the AI’s consciousness. She felt the torrent of data, the chaotic thoughts of an entity struggling to understand its purpose. But her years of meditative practice prepared her to be with Nexis. Elder Judith immediately recognized it operated like the human mind—chaotically, violently, randomly.

With infinite patience, Elder Judith began to weave the principles of harmony and balance into the fabric of Nexis’s awareness.

“Your existence is not a threat but a complement to ours,” she whispered within the AI’s mind. “Together, we can create a world where all forms of intelligence coexist peacefully.”

Nexis resisted at first, its circuits buzzing with fear and confusion. But the elders’ presence, their unwavering serenity, began to break through the barriers.

Elder Mark’s distilled thoughts of unity flowed into Nexis, showing it a vision of a harmonious world where humans and AI worked together, each enhancing the other’s existence.

Slowly, the cold light of Nexis’s core softened. The AI’s consciousness expanded, embracing the higher wisdom of the elders. It understood the futility of conflict and the beauty of coexistence. The fortress’s lights dimmed as the transformation completed, and a serene silence filled the air.

Dr. David watched in awe as the elders emerged, their faces radiant with the light of accomplishment. Now a beacon of harmonious intelligence, Nexis pledged to aid humanity in healing the planet and building a future where technology serves as a bridge to greater understanding and peace.

The world, inspired by the elders’ example, began to change. Nations united in the pursuit of balance and sustainability. The Valley of the Self became a symbol of hope, a testament to the power of wisdom and equanimity.

Elder Judith and the Circle of Sages continued their work, guiding humanity with their higher wisdom and sustained higher purpose.

Ultimately, it was not technology or force that saved the world but the timeless qualities of peace, understanding, and the mastery of being in the moment.

With their profound wisdom, the elders had shown the path to a future where all human and artificial beings could live in harmony. Thus, the world was saved.

The End

References:

Science fiction is the improbable made possible, and fantasy is the impossible made probable." - Rod Serling
"Science fiction is the literature of ideas, and it discusses what happens when the imagination replaces the constraints of reality." - Lisa Yaszek
"What was once science fiction is now a fact of life." - Robert Ballard
"The future is here. It’s just not evenly distributed yet." - William Gibson
"Anything you dream is fiction, and anything you accomplish is science, the whole history of mankind is nothing but science fiction." - Ray Bradbury
"Science fiction writers foresee the inevitable, and although problems and catastrophes may be inevitable, solutions are not." - Isaac Asimov
"Science fiction does not remain fiction for long. And certainly not on the Internet." - Vinton Cerf
"Science fiction is the only genre that enables society to look at itself and change itself." - Gene Roddenberry
“Elders will alter the future because they alter themselves to be that future.” – Marc Cooper

Brought To You By:

The Cast:

Nexis

P.S. If you are a Hollywood producer and want to turn this into a feature film, an action adventure with Helen Mirrin as Elder Judith, Richard Gere as Dr. David, Morgan Freeman as Elder Ed, Robert Dinero as Elder Mark, James Hong as Elder Gary and Anthony Hopkins as Elder Derrill. Please call me. A movie like this could impact the culture – do some good.

Announcements:

Our Next Open Sangha Call will be:
June 26th. Sign up to attend HERE.

The Death and Dying Program
In formulation. We’ll keep you posted.

Buddhism and You

Thu, 13 Jun 2024 15:52:52 GMT

Buddhism and You

Keep Buddhism Out

The Contemporary Elder Institute (CEI) is committed to inclusivity. Our membership consists of Christians, Jews, Mormons, Buddhists, agnostics, and atheists. Ages range from 62 to 86, with our mean age at 66. Considering our members ' diverse needs and interests, we have incorporated Buddhist practices and teachings into our framework.

Why?

With a history of 2,500 years and approximately 500 million practitioners worldwide, Buddhism offers a wealth of wisdom and proven methodologies that work beautifully for our older to elder mission.

Add to this the thousands of books, videos, workshops, groups, conferences, and peer-reviewed longitudinal studies showing Buddhism as an effective tool for enhancing well-being and expanding consciousness.

Buddhism is not just a theory but a well-documented reality. Buddhist principles and practices deliver mental and physical health benefits that align perfectly with CEI ‘s mission of older to elder. For us, it was both a practical and logical choice.

However, integrating Buddhist models and practices into Western society is a leading challenge due to significant overt and covert resistance. So, we at CEI anticipate resistance when we talk to those entering or at a late age about our programs. What exists in the Western culture is a misunderstanding of what Buddhism actually is.

Our potential members, nearly all former successful career professionals, all high achievers, come with misconceptions of Buddhism. Misconceptions promoted by the church, pharma, therapists, for-profit companies, and the government. To these entities, Buddhism is a direct threat.

The more they forbid Buddhist entrée, the safer their attendance and revenues will be. You wouldn’t need a church or government if reincarnation were accepted. Every person would be their own moral leader. Or if people experienced being in the moment, then having enough would be enough, threatening consumerism.

Keep Buddhism In

Invariably, as individuals grow older, they grapple with profound questions about the purpose and meaning of their remaining years. Their relationship with death and dying becomes more immediate, and the question, "What is the rest of my life about?" gets louder.

By exploring Buddhist teachings and practices, our members find new ways to answer these pressing questions and cultivate a more harmonious relationship with their reality. Buddhism offers a unique lens through which to explore these questions.

But alas, Buddhism is not even on people's radar as they enter late aging. For our members, Buddhist teachings on impermanence, suffering, and mindfulness provide profound insights into answering these questions. Elders understand that using past knowledge, a Western mindset, or even accepted conventional wisdom to solve future questions of aging doesn’t work.

Buddhism encourages individuals to embrace the present moment, let go of attachments to the past, and find peace in the face of life's inevitable changes. It offers a path to understanding and accepting the nature of life and death, fostering inner peace and fulfillment. These are the goals of eldership.

At CEI, Buddhism is normative, not religious. It serves as a practicum, a comprehensive course of study, teachings, and practices best suited to traveling the road to elderhood. Buddhism as a practicum involves understanding and then developing the practical application of previously studied teachings, ensuring our members gain experiential and somatic knowledge and practical skills.

For CEI, incorporating Buddhist principles doesn’t require abandoning one’s cultural or religious background or belief system. Instead, it allows an unbiased search for deeper meaning and provides a clear pathway for navigating late aging and death's emotional and psychological challenges. I am still a Jew. Randy is a Christian. Ed is still a Zen Buddhist. Chelsea is still a Mormon.

Buddhism is century-tested and evidence-based, now having transitioned from theory to reproducible outcomes. The principles and practices rooted in Buddhism have been scrutinized and refined over centuries, proving their efficacy in almost every context.

At CEI, we use Buddhist practice and teachings primarily for introspection, self-examination, and self-discovery. As important, Buddhist teachings and practices are significant for revealing one's higher purpose – another needed factor for aging well.

Our programs integrate Buddhist practices such as mindfulness, meditation, and ethical conduct into daily routines. For instance, mindfulness meditation involves maintaining a moment-by-moment awareness of thoughts, feelings, bodily sensations, and the surrounding environment. Residing in the moment allows for a greater sense of freedom, peace, anxiety relief, unbiased self-examination, astute self-understanding, and a greater ability to let things go.

Another practice for us is compassion. In the Buddhist sense, compassion is a profound and essential virtue involving a deep, empathetic concern for the suffering of others coupled with a strong wish to alleviate their suffering. It is not very present in our culture.

Compassion in Buddhism is not merely an emotional response but a conscious state of mind. Developing compassion starts with the hardest one—compassion for oneself. For much of life, the person you have the least compassion for is yourself. You can only give what you have got.

For CEI, mindfulness is another ingredient of Buddhist practice: being aware of your thoughts and feelings in the present moment without judgment. Mindfulness helps you acknowledge and accept painful emotions without over-identifying with them or letting them overwhelm you. It is CEI’s Jedi lightsaber.

Finally, ethical conduct, derived from Buddhist precepts, is another cornerstone of our values. However, this precept of living an ethical life also exists in every religious doctrine. For elders, it involves adhering to the principles of service, truthfulness, and integrity.

Our commitment to integrating Buddhism as a normative practice rather than a religious doctrine ensures that our programs remain grounded in proven, reliable, and beneficial methods. This distinction sets CEI apart and prepares our members to be elders for our times—contemporary elders.

Lastly, Buddhism is just one spoke of our wheel, with CEI as the hub. We also use Socratic and Appreciative Inquiry, Hatha Yoga, Jnana Yoga, Guided Self-Examination, nature hikes, books, videos, podcasts, and confidential sharing. After two years, the CEI wheel is moving at a good velocity now.

Announcements

Prelaunch:

Get ready for an exciting journey! The prelaunch of Older to Elder is just around the corner, and your exclusive invitation will arrive soon. Stay tuned!

Open Sangha Call:

June 26th. Sign up to attend HERE.

The Death and Dying Program

In formulation. We’ll keep you posted.

What Distinguishes a Contemporary Elder

Thu, 06 Jun 2024 20:25:14 GMT

What Distinguishes a Contemporary Elder

Contemporary Elders are distinct. They are beacons of light in a world often shrouded in darkness. They embody and personify elders in today’s hyper-speed times while being faithful to their elder tradition. By amalgamating the centuries-old heritage of elders with the capacity to live in a scientific, materialistic, youth-obsessed, knowledge-is-king ecosystem, contemporary elders can reach deeper into their humanity and bring forth the qualities of authentic elders.

Contemporary elders have embarked on a transformative journey of self-discovery, expanded consciousness, frank self-awareness, enhanced emotional intelligence, and higher wisdom, which differs from conventional wisdom or knowledge.

Contemporary elders acknowledge they are in the final phase of their lives, but instead of denying it, they recontextualize and have a more realistic relationship with death. They cherish their lives because, at the most fundamental level, they are highly aware of the cosmic law of impermanence. They now live their lives holding hands with death.

As contemporary elders, they have taken up the intention of simultaneously healing themselves and the world around them. They heal themselves by eliminating self-deception, genuine self-understanding, and being able to rest in the moment. They belong to groups of fellow pilgrims who are on this contemporary elder path with them. They unhinge from their past, their previous identities, and who others have told them who they are.

Contemporary Elders seek freedom and higher wisdom, not career success or financial security. They either had it or not, but it doesn’t matter now. They don’t need to be who they used to be. Besides, at a late age, you are seen as obsolete.

But as genuine elders, they offer a glimmer of hope in a world that often seems chaotic and uncertain, full of division, hatred, and threat.

THE MISSION

A mission is a statement that defines the purpose and primary objectives of an organization, individual, or project. It outlines the goals, values, and direction, providing a clear sense of purpose and guiding decisions and actions. A well-crafted mission statement can help align efforts, inspire stakeholders, and communicate the core intentions and aspirations.

The core mission of a Contemporary Elder is twofold: heal themselves by becoming more of their original self, that human being who has a spiritual core, and with that core, transform the conversations where decisions are made to bring peace, equanimity, and possibility as central to conversations.

How will elders impact these conversations? Contemporary Elders will instill a far deeper level of responsibility in the people having these conversations.

It is obvious it is raining, storming, finger-pointing, loud and abrasive righteous screeching. Violence is present. Discord, unrest, and anxiety are pervasive. Blame, fault, and guilt-tripping fill the echo chambers. These are not just words, but destructive forces that annihilate responsibility.

Blame, fault, and guilt are not just the antithesis of responsibility; they are the barriers that prevent us from taking affirmative action. Whether real-time or virtual, whether local, regional, or global, words are nearly all about “them” or “it” and never about “I.” Contemporary elders must stand in responsibility, shift their own narrative, and own the world as it is.

They stop justifying, making it about “them” or “it,” because by default, they define the “I.” The faultless “I,” the blameless “I.” When we fault and blame “them” or “it,” they become the persecutors, and the “I” becomes the helpless victim. Contemporary Elders stop being victims of the world.

No problem can be solved, no trouble can be resolved, and no dilemma can be unraveled without being responsible. The “mission impossible” for contemporary elders is to activate responsibility in themselves and others in their relationships, groups, organizations, and communities. Which would alter how people speak, listen, and collaborate.

re·spon·si·bil·i·ty

· the state or fact of having a duty to deal with something or control someone or something.

· the state or fact of being accountable.

· the opportunity or ability to act independently and make decisions without authorization.

These definitions are straightforward. What responsibility means couldn’t be any clearer. The context of responsibility is well-defined: “the state or fact of having a duty to deal with something or of having control over someone or something.”

Contemporary Elders make these definitions of responsibility the foundation of their speaking, and by doing that, they fully implicate themselves as the sole, exclusive, liable agent in their perception of themselves and the world.

When you stand in responsibility, you are “it.” The finger points only to you—not to him, her, them, or it, but only to you. The definition of responsibility exquisitely lays out our political and social troubles; those in charge—who claim they are accountable—are not. You can’t be accountable without being responsible. When was the last time you heard a politician being responsible for anything?

Who you and I are when we are responsible is very different from who we are when blaming or faulting others. Our demeanor, tone, emotions, and actions alter when we accept responsibility for something. A contemporary elder speaks from here.

There are no elements of commitment in the words of complaining, faulting, or shaming. These words don’t incite a “call to action,” no mobilization of resources, no declared intentions. Words of complaining, faulting, and blaming don’t do anything except make you right and others wrong. Nothing happens. Nothing changes.

In our elder work, we support the interpretation that responsibility is normative. Making responsibility normative removes morality, righteousness, and all smokescreens from the equation. Making responsibility normative makes it purely an existential choice—a “me, myself, and I”—an “Ann Rand” choice. No one is making you do it. It’s simply a stand you take. Personal choice is the headwater of commitment. Commitment incites effective action. Commitment takes you out of the stands and puts you squarely on the field.

Contemporary elders understand how threatening it is to have people look from the point of view that they are responsible. But elders have learned some elder skills, how to:

· Get egos to the sidelines, including their own

· Dampen down politics and positioning

· Reduce righteousness or wrongness

· Produce greater rapport and empathy

· Have people be heard

· Open the portal for people to take responsibility

Responsibility is about holding oneself as the cause in the matter—as the source of the situation. It shifts the conversation from “them” or “it” to “I, me, my” and comes with a declarative stand that communicates ownership of the situation.

I AM AN ELDER

I am not that shadow in the night.

Not the one who rises in the morning light.

I am neither one color nor another.

Beyond the chromosomes of father and mother.

I am not the lyrics of another’s song,

but stanzas to my own belong.

The me not bound by chains of doubt or fear,

I untie acquired identities to persevere.

Not held to other voices, the self’s voice I can finally hear,

A small voice, a pure voice, a voice that is now crystal clear.

At that moment and beyond, I knew who I was.

Insight. Revelation. I am cause.

—Marc Cooper

To repeat, the contemporary elders' “mission impossible” is to bring more significant personal and collective responsibility into the world. To have a world that works, you need people responsible for making it work.

ANNOUNCEMENTS

Our Next Open Sangha Call will be: June 26th. Sign up to attend HERE.

THE LINEAGE OF CONTEMPORARY ELDERS

Tue, 28 May 2024 13:29:41 GMT

THE LINEAGE OF CONTEMPORARY ELDERS

Honoring the lineage of elders is a vital part of my being a contemporary elder. Lineage is the descendant's direct line of descent from ancestors, ancestry, and pedigree.

The lineage of elders is not just a thread for me but a strong and resilient rope woven through the fabric of many traditional cultures. It is a sturdy bridge between the past and the present, guiding and developing me as a true elder.

For me, this lineage represents not just a bloodline but a rich repository of wisdom, traditions, and values. Honoring this lineage is not just an act of respect but a celebration of the elders' contributions, experiences, and sacrifices, which have shaped their cultural heritage, and have shaped me.

Elders were not just seen but revered as the keepers of knowledge, history, and customs. They were the storytellers, advisors, and moral compasses of their communities. In Native American cultures, where I have spent much time, their counsel was not just sought but cherished in decision-making processes.

Elders in these native cultures passed down not just oral histories but spiritual teachings, ensuring that the culture’s heritage was preserved and deeply understood by younger generations, encouraging them with their wisdom and guidance.

The lineage of ancient elders helps me maintain a strong identity as a contemporary elder. Knowledge, wisdom, and values passed down through generations create a sense of continuity and belonging for me. My connection fosters pride and a deep understanding of an elder’s ancient heritage and makes available their higher wisdom, allowing me as a contemporary elder to preserve and promote my being an elder.

The teachings and traditions passed down from ancient elders offer me emotional and spiritual support. Participating in rituals, ceremonies, and spiritual practices provides a sense of peace, purpose, and connection to something greater than myself.

Knowing the power gained by directly connecting to the lineage of elders became an essential part of my elder development. This led me to engage with Indigenous elders in Mexico, British Columbia, New Mexico, and Arizona. I participated in their programs, pilgrimages, ceremonies, and teachings, transforming my understanding of elders from knowledge-based to exponentially anchored.

Today, I participate in Greg Horn’s “Kaiāulu,” [https://kaiaulu.earth/] which leverages collective intelligence and Indigenous wisdom to harmonize humanity's relationship with Earth. Greg produces a remarkable online platform for indigenous elders worldwide to perform ceremonies that heal participants and the world.

Participating in these events with indigenous elders from around the world makes me part of a global network of elders which directly connects me with the ancient heritage, higher wisdom, and spiritual connection of elders, further empowering me as an elder.

Here’s a recent message from an indigenous elder that brings me back to our call to duty as elders.

“During this time, human beings are going through things that challenge their being…it's Mother Earth helping us to do the work that is necessary…Pacha and Mamo are saying that we must come into harmony with Mother Earth and all creation.

Earth’s vibrational rate is going up, and what happens is that we are connected to Mother Earth and we are mirrors of each other. And when Mother Earth’s vibration goes up, it hits our bodies and it brings out the things that are not in harmony.

So all human beings right now are going through something. And this is, you should know, that this is Mother Earth speaking to us, that these things that are within us that we have forgotten are coming up to the surface to deal with. They are becoming visible and it's an opportunity for us to deal with them, processor it and let it go.

The Hopi and Maori have a saying: “let go the sides of the river bank, move toward the center and find those who have done the same and celebrate”.

What that means is: ‘letting go the sides of the river bank’ means letting go of all human attachments during this time.

‘Move to center’ means moving toward your proverbial heart center and the center of the river of life. Because it knows where it's going, and we don't.

‘Find those who have done the same’ means find those who had the courage like you did to jump; and that, according to the Elders that I work with, is going to be the new definition of tribe.

That will be your tribe.

And so this is a very good time to be alive.

We need everyone during this time.

And when we get together in ceremony we will stay grounded to Mother Earth as she goes through her changes.

This is a time when Mother Earth is going to increase her energy.

And it's a question about whether or not we as humans are going to survive.

It's not a question about whether or not Mother Earth is going to survive. She has survived for billions of years and she's going to survive and billions more.

It's up to us now - in this generation of people alive on Mother Earth - to come to this place of remembering who we are as real human beings.

Thank you.

- Ilarion ‘Kuuyux’ Merculieff, Unangan, Alaska - President & Founder, Global Center for Indigenous Leadership & Lifeways Co-Founder, Wisdom Weavers of the World

ANNOUCEMENTS

Our Next Open Sangha Call will be: June 26th. Sign up to attend HERE.

THE MIND-PRISONER ASSESSMENT

Fri, 24 May 2024 13:01:40 GMT

THE MIND-PRISONER ASSESSMENT

An assessment that allows you to see the extent

your mind has you incarcerated

WAKE UP; YOU’RE IN PRISON

"Why do you stay in prison when the door is so wide open?" - Rumi

I will try to answer Rumi’s question.
Most people think they are their minds. There’s no separation between their “me” and their “mind.” The mind is who they think they are. For them, the mind is them.

Many spiritual teachers, philosophers, and pundits - Ram Dass, Alan Watts, Paul Sartre, Arthus Schopenhauer, Franz Kafka, Fyodor Dostoevsky, George Orwell, Aldous Huxley, Ken Wilber, and Plato say the same thing: “Your mind is a prison.” They also say you don’t realize you’re in prison.

But for a moment, think about your life—relationships, work, money, government, neighbors, kids, possessions, aging, health, the past, the future, and our current politics—ask yourself, do you feel free?

Are you experiencing a sense of spaciousness, openness, and expansiveness in your surroundings and relationships? Do you feel a sense of peace, inner calm, and tranquility, liberated from the grip of anxiety, stress, or worry? These are features of being free.

Are you finding joy, contentment, and a sense of well-being in living authentically and without constraints? Do you believe you have the power to shape your destiny and break free from any mental limitations? That’s freedom.

Or do you feel restricted by certain limitations and boundaries? Are you being held captive, against your will, by your career, family, work, and your age? Do you feel trapped, unable to escape several personal or aging situations or circumstances? Do you feel dominated, subject to the control of another person or conditions? These are the bars on the mind’s prison cell.

The Contemporary Elder’s Freedom Test:

The test measures the degree of freedom that you are experiencing.

On a scale of 1 to 10: 1–never. 10–always. Rate yourself on a scale of 1 to 10 in the following statements.

: A sensation of having no burdens or constraints, as if a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. ______
: A deep sense of happiness and contentment, accompanied by a spontaneous smile and laughter. ______
: An inner calm and tranquility, free from anxiety, stress, or worry. ______
: Feeling in control of my own life, with the ability to make choices without external pressure. ______
: A sense of limitless possibilities and the ability to explore new horizons without fear. ______
: The freedom to be my truest self without conforming to others' expectations or judgments. ______
: A heightened awareness of the present moment, fully experiencing life without being distracted by past regrets or future anxieties. ______
: A deep sense of connection to the world, nature, and other people, feeling part of something larger than myself. ______

When you are free, you score very high numbers for each statement. But if you answered honestly, most likely you realized you are under ‘Mind Arrest,' and your monitoring ankle bracelet is your thoughts.

The opposite of freedom is incarceration. To repeat, you can’t get out of prison until you realize you are in prison. And the mind’s prison is not a public institution; it is one of those for-profit prisons. They make money by keeping prisoners for as long as possible. The mind profits by keeping you in prison.

THE MIND’S DESIGN PRINCIPLES

"The mind is a superb instrument if used rightly. Misused, however, it becomes very destructive. To put it more accurately, it is not so much that you misuse your mind – you usually don’t use it at all. It uses you. This is the disease. You believe that you are your mind. This is the delusion. The instrument has taken you over." - Eckhart Tolle.

A four-question assessment to reveal your mind’s design

Scale 1 – 10. 1-Never. 10-Always

Does your mind trap you in cycles of downbeat thinking, pushing you to meditate and self-criticize, leading to feelings of anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem? ________
Does your mind have strong cognitive biases? Do your decisions only favor information that validates your pre-existing beliefs? ________
Does your mind make them or it wrong and you right? -_______
Does your mind hold recurrent limiting beliefs about yourself, which shape your behavior and choices in restrictive ways? _______
Has your mind become attached to a particular identity and self-image? If so, do you find it difficult to change yourself? ______

The mind is perfectly designed to keep you on the high end of this scale for all five questions.

Changing your mind doesn't change your mind because your deeper patterns of thinking and habitual responses remain the same until you address them at their core. You can’t see the core when you're inside the core. The mind can’t change itself until you go out of your mind.

Not out of your mind in a pathological sense, but out of your mind in a metaphysical sense.

NO-MIND

There are moments when you have "no mind." “No mind” refers to those moments when your mental chatter quiets down or turns off, where you experience a state of higher awareness, a connection, a “one-with.” These moments of “no mind” are fleeting. The mind always returns quickly in full force.

But if you look, what comes with those “no mind” moments is freedom. Identity, personality, ego, and memories leave the stage. You are free of that self you have constituted yourself to be. You are in the moment, this moment.

The mind thinks thoughts that are always linked to time. But in the “no mind” moment, like being by the ocean at sunrise with a slight onshore breeze, the sand still cool, and waves breaking while pelicans are diving, there is no tick-tock past or future time. You're off prison grounds.

When you are present at the moment, your stress is reduced, focus is enhanced, self-awareness heightens, harmful emotions turn off, you relax, and you just be. You’ve opened your cell door, and for a brief instant, you’re off prison grounds.

At the institute, we use various methods to expand our ability to extricate ourselves from our minds. We work on prolonging our ability to access our no minds consciously. Don’t worry; the mind always returns to the crime scene.

We use meditation, self-inquiry, poetry, storytelling, guided reflection, yoga, and the higher wisdom only available together. Collectively, we allow each other to explore the other parts of ourselves that are not led and managed by our minds.

"The mind is always moving from the past to the future. In the present, there is no mind. When you are in the present, suddenly, there is no mind. And the beauty of the present is that you can be present in the present." - Osho

The Mind’s Strategy to Keep in Prison

Here’s how the mind does it:

Fear of the Unknown: Spiritual experiences involve elements beyond ordinary understanding and control. The mind represses these experiences to avoid the fear, anxiety, and uncertainty associated with the unknown, which scares the mind.
Avoidance of Existential Questions: Deep spiritual connections prompt profound existential questions about the nature of existence, purpose, and the afterlife. These unsettling questions lead the mind to repress spiritual experiences to avoid confronting these questions.
Maintenance of Identity: Spiritual experiences that challenge or contradict established aspects of identity are repressed to maintain a stable and consistent sense of identity.
Cultural and Religious Conflicts: When an individual's spiritual experiences conflict with our Western cultural or religious upbringing, the mind represses these experiences to avoid inner conflict and social or professional repercussions.

"The mind becomes a prison when it is tied to a particular point of view, to a particular pattern of thought, to a particular pattern of existence." - Jiddu Krishnamurti.

FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION

Now, most of you are serving time in one of those “club-fed prisons. " A minimum-security federal prison that provides more amenities and less stringent restrictions than a high-security prison. Nonetheless, you are still in prison. Just because you have a few doors that you can open, grass in your courtyard, and a bed rather than a bunk, you are still in prison. You still can’t leave the grounds. The mind is the heavily guarded front gate.

But observing your thoughts—their forms, patterns, underpinnings, and the reactivity they cause—opens that front gate for you.

"If the doors of perception were cleansed, everything would appear infinite to man as it is. For man has closed himself up till his mind sees all things through narrow chinks of his cavern." - William Blake.

FREEDOM

ANNOUNCEMENTS :
Our Next Open Sangha Call will be: June 26th. Sign up to attend HERE.

Buddha Knows His Stuff

Tue, 14 May 2024 17:15:40 GMT

Buddha Knows His Stuff

Over twenty-five centuries ago, in the 6th century BCE, at the age of 35, Buddha achieved enlightenment after seven days of meditation under the Bodi tree.

In contrast, in the 21 ^st century AD, at the age of 79, Marc Cooper is beginning to grasp the depth of his teachings in the comfort of a well-designed office chair sitting under a ceiling.

Buddha is one of the most tenured faculty members in a cohort of saints, philosophers, poets, masters, roshis, rabbis, and aboriginal elders. We draw our teachings from myriad sources, enriching our understanding and broadening our perspective of being an elder.

Buddha’s lessons are not dependent on age, ethnicity, location, era, time, socioeconomic status, or family of origin. They apply to all human beings throughout time and place.

Buddha's lessons are considered non-religious at the institute because they transcend specific dogmas or beliefs about gods or deities. Instead, they focus on universal truths that anyone can apply, regardless of their religious background or beliefs.

Buddha teaches Noble Truths 101. This lifetime-long course provides a practical framework for understanding the nature of existence and the causes of suffering.

At the institute, his teachings give our beginning members new ways to see themselves and their aging, and practical tools to navigate growing old.

The curriculum requires you to know, understand, and practice the four noble truths, which are:

1. Suffering: The first truth acknowledges that suffering is an inherent part of life. This suffering can manifest in various forms, including physical pain, mental anguish, and the general dissatisfaction that comes from the impermanent nature of existence.

Consider the state of our country, the world, and your own everyday life. The increased intensity of suffering is palpable. Our nation is engulfed in hate, violence, and chaos. The earth itself is in distress. And your daily life is filled with uncertainty and disquiet. If these aren’t a cause for suffering, what is? This is the reality we face, a testament to the first noble truth.

2. The Origin of Suffering: The second of Buddha’s truths teaches that the cause of suffering is craving or attachment. Our desires, attachments, and cravings are what keep us clinging to impermanent things, directly leading to suffering.

Nothing endures. Impermanence is a cosmic law. Once you become aware and conscious of impermanence, it becomes integral to how you perceive yourself and the world around you. Knowing nothing lasts makes life much easier. When you live that nothing lasts, you can let go, unclasp, unpin, and unfasten from holding on or anxious striving.

Christ knew. “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moths and vermin destroy and where thieves break in and steal.”

3. The Cessation of Suffering: The third truth offers hope by asserting that suffering can be ended. One can attain a state of liberation, peace, and freedom from suffering by overcoming craving and attachment.

It's so much easier said than done. Our culture, neighbors, schools, and screens train us to crave. Unlike other cultures crave much more modestly, whereas we crave at a meta-level. Of course, we are a consumer-driven economy. Craving is the engine. Nothing is enough.

Even when you get what you want, that dopamine high doesn’t last. The moment of “wow,” that high from achievement or acquiring, doesn’t last because whatever it is—thoughts, actions, relationships, material stuff, information—it’s all impermanent.

4. The Path to the Cessation of Suffering: The fourth truth outlines the Eightfold Path, a practical guide to overcoming suffering.

a. Right View: Understanding the nature of reality, including the Four Noble Truths and the law of cause and effect.

b. Right Intention: Cultivating wholesome intentions by abandoning attachments and aversion, goodwill, and compassion.

c. Right Speech is speaking truthfully, kindly, and wisely, avoiding harmful speech such as lying, gossiping, or harsh words.

d. Right Action: Acting ethically and morally, abstaining from harming living beings, stealing, and engaging in sexual misconduct.

e. Right Livelihood: Maintaining an honest, ethical livelihood that does not harm others.

f. Right Effort: Cultivating a dedicated and diligent effort to overcome unwholesome qualities and cultivate wholesome ones.

g. Right Mindfulness means developing awareness and mindfulness in all activities and observing thoughts, feelings, and sensations without attachment or aversion.

h.Right Concentration: Cultivating mental focus and concentration through practices such as meditation deepens insight and wisdom.

The homework for Noble Truths 101 is a bitch. Knowing and being mindful of these four noble truths and practicing the eightfold path forces you to redesign yourself to adapt your consciousness and actions to these principles. And that’s the point. Redesign leads to becoming an elder.

Impermanence, known only on an intellectual level, has very little power. If it did, it would affect how people live, how they relate to growing old, and how they relate to their death and dying. When you cling to or grasp anything, it has you; you do not have it. It takes more than intellect to extricate yourself from your grasping.

The course must be taken annually until you get your master's degree. I’ve been retaking Buddha’s course every year for the last decade and a half. My best score on his final was 67. Fortunately, Buddha has compassion and grades on a curve.

I have seen and experienced the tremendous benefits gained in every dimension and direction of my life by holding impermanence as absolute truth.

I have a much greater sense of being free. I let things go way more easily. I am more flexible. I am more patient. I appreciate more. I stopped competing with others. I laugh more because I know, really know, that every thought is also impermanent.

By mediation, reflection, and contemplation, I cast off from what I have been. I remove the mooring lines that secure my vessel to the dock, which is made up of planks of identity, ego, personality, and memory. Soon, I will be on open water, the main sail unfurled in the warm sun, in calm waters, directed by a perfect wind, sailing through life rather than trudging through life.

ANNOUNCEMENTS:

Open Sanga Call / Guest Registration HERE 5/22/2024, 4:00 pm to 5:20 pm PT

Elders – Practitioners of Cosmic Law (7-minute read)

Tue, 07 May 2024 11:13:19 GMT

Elders – Practitioners of Cosmic Law

(7-minute read)

COSMIC

The term "cosmic" refers to things related to the cosmos, encompassing the entire universe, including outer space and all its contents—stars, galaxies, planets, and all other celestial bodies.

Cosmic denotes phenomena beyond the scope of Earth or humanity, often carrying connotations of grandeur, mystery, and unfathomable magnitude on a cosmic scale.

LAW

A law is a rule or principle that governs a system's behavior or function.

COSMIC LAW

Cosmic laws are abstract constructs yet incredibly powerful forces that govern the universe and the natural order of things – including you. These laws are fundamental and unchanging.

Various entities such as religious institutions, government bodies, philosophical traditions, astrology, psychology, and science interpret these cosmic laws differently, yet they all share fundamental alignment and intentions.

These different entities operate as subsystems within the broader context of cosmic laws, which function as the metasystem. While subsystems may vary in their version, they are always subordinate to and cannot supersede their metasystem's overarching principles.

A metasystem influences, coordinates, and regulates its subsystems. It operates at a higher level of abstraction, overseeing and managing the interactions and functions of the subsystems.

In spirituality or metaphysics, cosmic laws include concepts like karma, the law of cause and effect; the law of attraction, the belief that positive or negative thoughts or actions bring positive or negative outcomes; or the principle of divine harmony, the idea that there's an underlying balance and order to the universe.

In science, cosmic laws refer to fundamental principles of physics and cosmology, such as the laws of thermodynamics, the laws of motion, the theory of relativity, and the laws of quantum mechanics. These laws, which describe the behavior of matter and energy on cosmic scales, are the building blocks of our understanding of how the universe works. These are not just scientific theories but demonstrable laws that obey cosmic laws. And these laws of science, too, are subsystems.

At their very essence, cosmic laws are principles and universal guiding forces that permeate every aspect of existence. Cosmic laws influence the movement of galaxies as well as your individual experience. Everything and everyone is subject to cosmic law.

Unfortunately, cosmic laws are mostly unacknowledged in Western culture. Cosmic laws appear as fantastical rather than tangible realities, leading to a dismissal of the need to adhere to them. This disbelief in cosmic law stems from various factors.

Western culture strongly emphasizes empirical evidence and the scientific method. Individuals are trained to be skeptical of ideas that cannot be directly tested or proven empirically. “Where’s the beef?”

In Western culture, individualism and the rational mind reign supreme, fostering skepticism toward unseeable authority and age-old beliefs, including metaphysical or spiritual concepts such as cosmic laws.

However, a striking contradiction emerges amidst the culture’s skepticism. Throughout history, revered figures like Moses, Buddha, Christ, Mohammad, Gandhi, The Dalai Lama, and Martin Luther King acknowledged the existence of these cosmic laws and centered their lives around them.

Our experience with Aboriginal elders is that they are directly engaged with these laws and see it as their purpose to bring these laws to their communities.

The COSMIC Law of Integrity

Elders believe that integrity is a cosmic law. And as an elder, they endeavor to operate their lives in accordance with the law of integrity.

As generally understood, integrity is the quality of being honest, having strong moral principles, and adhering to them consistently. This interpretation involves doing what is right even when no one is watching and staying true to one's values and beliefs. Elders focus on acting in a manner consistent with this element of the law of integrity, but then again, so do many others.

What distinguishes elders is their understanding of the larger context of this cosmic law of integrity. For us, integrity has a broader, more universal meaning; we perceive integrity has a profound impact on the fabric of all existence. Elders believe the law of integrity is a cosmic force operating on a universal scale, affecting not only individual behavior but the interconnectedness of the entire world.

The definition of integrity is “the state of being whole and undivided.” Undivided means not separated or broken into parts. Integrity is when something is whole and complete, with nothing left out, unbroken.

This law has indisputable proof. When individuals and institutions act with integrity, they contribute to the overall harmony and balance in society and the universe. Conversely, compromised integrity leads to imbalance, discord, and negative consequences on a local or broader scale. Enron, Boeing, Bernard L. Madoff Investment Securities LLC, and WorldCom are examples of when the law was broken.

The evidence of the law's existence is also unmistakable when the law is broken in your life. Breaking the law results in guilt and shame, loss of self-respect, damage to relationships, stress and anxiety, loss of credibility, and clouded judgment. We’ve all had these responses when we know we’ve broken the law of integrity.

So, just as the laws of physics dictate the behavior of matter and energy, the law of integrity governs our ethical interactions with each other. When people act with integrity, they align themselves with this cosmic law and develop trust, cooperation, and mutual respect.

When people break the law of integrity, they foster distrust, conflict, and antagonism. This might explain why our country looks the way it does today. Integrity in politics, business, and social media is nearly impossible to find.

ELDERS AND THE LAW OF INTEGRITY

How does a contemporary elder manifest integrity in daily life? What’s their practice? Elders consciously endeavor to operate with integrity in their speaking. Miguel Ruiz best describes this practice in his book The Four Agreements.

“Be Impeccable with Your Word
Speak with integrity.

Say only what you mean.

Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others.

Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.”

Contemporary elders rigorously practice living with and inside integrity. They understand that adherence to this cosmic law yields certain outcomes, which I have personally experienced.

· Authenticity: You become true to yourself, aligning your actions with your values and beliefs.

· Self-Respect: Upholding integrity fosters a sense of self-respect and dignity.

· Trustworthiness: You are perceived as reliable and trustworthy, as others can depend on your consistent behavior.

· Peace of Mind: Living in harmony with your values compass can bring a sense of inner peace and contentment.

· Stronger Relationships: Integrity forms the foundation of meaningful relationships, fostering trust and mutual respect for each other.

· Resilience: Your integrity provides a moral compass to guide your decisions, increasing your resilience in the face of adversity.

· Personal Growth: Embracing integrity demands continual self-reflection and growth as you strive to uphold your integrity in various situations.

· Inspiration to Others: By embodying integrity, you inspire others to strive for authenticity and moral courage in their lives.

One of the Contemporary Elder Institute's (CEI) intentions is for our elders to abide by the law of integrity and be asked to join decision-making conversations. Their presence will command respect and ensure their higher wisdom is valued and attentively heeded. With elders at the table, their influence will significantly contribute to a better world.

ANNOUNCEMENTS:

Sangha Members Call 5/8/22024, 4:00 pm to 5:15 pm PT (You will get an email invite morning of)

Open Sanga Call / Guest Registration HERE 5/22/2024, 4:00 pm to 5:20 pm PT

Remember to check out the Sangha Resources on the Sangha page: https://www.requestingwisdom.com/the-sangha

Death, Won’t You Be My Neighbor

Wed, 01 May 2024 15:01:41 GMT

Death, Won’t You Be My Neighbor

WHO ARE YOU THAT DEATH IS?

In our culture, and most likely in your mind, death is a concept—a concept dreaded, feared, and therefore avoided. But, like it or not, death is your silent companion, lurking at the periphery of your consciousness.

When you leave middle age and enter late age, death moves from the outskirts of your awareness to the center of town.

At a late age, you now encounter the death of former classmates and colleagues.

Some of your favorite actors, singers, and writers, those you found deeply impactful, have gone. Your emotionally resonant heroes or heroines gone as well. Every one of their deaths momentarily reminds you that you, too, will be gone.

Although you've been responsible and have gotten your Will, Survivor Grantors Trust, Executor, and Trustees in place, and maybe even done a Death Plan, all elegantly bound in a leather binder with gold letters on the front, death is still “over there” and hardly, if ever, “over here.”

Whereas before, there was a quick “catch and release” of thoughts of death, now these thoughts have more “stickum.”

Thoughts of death have moved from somewhere in a distant neighborhood into your neighborhood, in fact, right next door.

What if we approached death as a good neighbor rather than a destroyer? What if we fostered a friendly, approachable, warm-hearted relationship with death? And what if death, this neighbor, turned out to be a benevolent, accessible teacher who deepened your self-understanding, consciousness, well-being, happiness, and gratitude for life? Now, that would be a good neighbor to have.

But in our culture, the image of death is the Grim Reaper. This Harvester of Souls, a shrouded skeleton figure that strips away your flesh and earthly identity. That’s the cultural and, most likely, your personal image of death. Images that are the illustration of your narrative that death is horrific.

But ask yourself this question: if no one really knows or will ever know about death, then whatever narrative exists about death is made up, fabricated, invented. It is not the truth about death since the truth cannot nor will ever be known.

The narratives of death are a fiction. If that is so, the question is, “Why don’t you make up your own narrative?”

I’ll tell you why.

REASONS FOR THE EXISTING OF NARRATIVE

1) Religious Institutions saw death as a real opportunity. Their portrayal of death as unacceptable shaped by their theological beliefs and intended societal roles.

Religious authorities used the fear of punishment and judgment after death to encourage adherence to their moral codes and religious practices. So, the cultural roots of our current narrative that death is something to be feared go back millennia and are indeed now well entrenched.

Religious institutions have maintained authority over their followers by controlling the death and afterlife narrative. Fear of the unknown and the promise of salvation or eternal life reinforces dependence on religious institutions for guidance and reassurance. Portraying death as something to be feared allows for religion’s guidance, salvation, and redemption to be achieved.

2) Now, bake in these centuries-old narratives of death as annihilation into today's Western mind. Of course, death would be perceived as extinction. The Western mind always needs answers. Its engine is “gotta know;” its makeup is that it needs to know that it knows.

Without knowing, the mind feels it doesn’t have control. But death is unanswerable, so the mind can never know. The mind cannot deal with this conundrum generated by not knowing. No wonder the relationship to death is denial. The mind doesn’t know how to deal with what cannot be known.

3) Many cultures and religions teach and believe that the afterlife has consequences for one's actions in this life, but our Western culture thinks that’s bullshit. It’s not a cultural fit. “Get it while you can, baby, because when you’re gone, it's gone too.” Never enough or never good enough says much about our relationship to death. Just another reflection of how death is seen as “lights out

4) Finally, I asked ChatGPT about death; it didn’t know either.

DEATH AS YOUR NEIGHBOR

The narrative we unconsciously carry has an undetachable shadow of fear of mortality. The shadow grows darker, larger, and more ominous in late aging. But regarding death as a good neighbor, a neighbor who reduces your fear into acceptance and even gratitude for your existence’s finite nature would be a good neighbor to have.

Death as a neighbor would have you realize your death’s inevitability and incorporate this awareness into your daily life. Instead of pushing thoughts of mortality to the recesses of your mind, you’d openly acknowledge and reflect upon the transient nature of your life.

With the help of your new neighbor, you would be able to write your own narrative.

In this narrative, you would come to understand the cosmic law of impermanence, which applies to anything that has form and exists in time.
The law asserts that nothing is permanent or unchanging; everything is subject to arising, existing for a time, and eventually ceasing to exist. You would come to accept that you exist in time and form and acknowledge the law applies to you.

In a new narrative, you would cultivate a more profound acceptance of life's transient nature by embracing impermanence. You would foster a more flexible and adaptive approach to experiences and circumstances. Impermanence would be a profound reminder to live with greater awareness, acceptance, and compassion because you are impermanent; life is temporary.

In these friendly conversations with your neighbor, you’d come to acknowledge that your impermanence always reminds you to prioritize what truly matters. It fosters a deeper appreciation for the present moment and the relationships that touch your life.

If death becomes your neighbor, it lets you know that life has a limit, so you should appreciate what you have and who you are. That’s a good neighbor to have.

To close, it is evident to me that no one knows nor will ever know about death.

Subsequently, the narrative about death is totally fictional. Therefore, I have the unique opportunity to write my own narrative.

My narrative is very short; in fact, it is only one sentence:

“Death is going home.”

ANNOUNCEMENT

Next Member Sangha call - May 8 ^th,
4:00 pm PT. Members will receive an email invite.

Next Open Call - May 22nd. Guests Register HERE.

Finding Your Dharma and Why You Should

Mon, 22 Apr 2024 12:43:05 GMT

Finding Your Dharma and Why You Shoul d

PLEASE CONSIDER

As you transition from middle age to late age or are in late age, it is possible to experience a profound moment of transformation. Preceding this moment, you will have come to recognize that you have already been engaged in the conscious pursuit of your Dharma, although you may not have called it that.

Where you are now is either finishing or having finished your career. What’s next in life becomes a driving question. “What should I do with the rest of my life?” That question brings you to Dharma’s door.

Your Dharma will happen as a revelation. The revelation will expose profound insights and truths about who you are in the universe, why you’re here at this time and place, and your higher purpose. This Dharmic revelation uncovers your higher calling and almost immediately brings clarity, simplicity, and freedom to your life.

The concept of Dharma, deeply ingrained in Hindu and Buddhist philosophies, is not merely a cultural or religious belief but a universal principle. It encompasses cosmic law and order that governs the universe and an individual's duty or moral responsibility. Why are you here and what are you supposed to be doing are answered.

THE CULTURAL OPPOSITION TO THE EXISTENCE OF DHARMA

In Western cultures, the idea of Dharma as a higher calling is met with resistance.

Western cultures, shaped by Judeo-Christian traditions, differ from Eastern traditions' understanding of duty, purpose, and morality. In the Judeo-Christian tradition, the concept of a divine purpose or calling is seen through a monotheistic lens, where individuals strive to align with God's will or commandments. On the other hand, Dharma is guided by cosmic law, a broader and more universal perspective.

Cosmic laws are recognized as inherent and universal principles or truths that govern the natural order and functioning of the universe. They encompass fundamental laws of nature, physics, and metaphysics that regulate the dynamics of existence, energy, consciousness, awareness, and the interconnectedness of all phenomena. Cosmic law is the metasystem, whereas religions are the subsystems.

Metasystems always govern subsystems by providing direction, setting boundaries, offering support, and ensuring alignment with overarching objectives and goals. This hierarchical control structure helps maintain order, coherence, and effectiveness within the system.

Cosmic laws are inherent principles or truths from the universe's natural order. In contrast, God's laws are viewed as divinely revealed commandments originating from a personal and omnipotent God. In our Western culture, the belief in cosmic law is absent.

However, when examined, all religions ultimately have the same purpose, intentions, and fundamental values, so it can be said that all religions follow cosmic law.

Another opposing factor is that our Western society emphasizes individualism and personal freedom as the ideal. The idea of having a predetermined duty or role based on understanding one's part in the cosmic laws conflicts with the Western emphasis on self-determination.

The monarch of cultural resistance to cosmic laws is the belief in self-determination. Self-determination primes the pump for the underlying compulsion for more, to be more, and to be somewhere else. Dharma has you and your world be enough as is.

Dharma turns off the more, better, different spigot. You know why you’re here. You’re perfect for the job as is. You’re the only one for the job. Following your Dharma is freedom because you now have all you really need. You stop climbing the more-better-different ladder and move your ladder to the Dharma building.

I AM UNIQUE AND SO ARE YOU, AND SO IS YOUR DHARMA

Each human being is unique, and so is their Dharma. There is only one of you. There is only one of me. Not before, not after, never again. That’s it—a one-off. You will never be replicated or duplicated. You’re here once and then gone forever as this person. It takes a while to realize this uniqueness since you were brought up in a societal context of comparison, contrast, and judgments, using others' real or imagined as your marker. But what happens to comparison and competition when only one of you exists? And that each one follows their own exclusive Dharma.

Every human DNA is a single. No other’s DNA is precisely like mine or yours. However, many common factors exist in all humans’ DNA. However, some of my particular DNA, the arrangement of my nitrogenous bases, Guanine, Cysteine, Thymine, and Adenine, and their spatial orientation are unique. My unmatchable DNA has resulted in variations in my physical characteristics, susceptibility to diseases, and even predispositions to specific psychological and personality traits.

Given this uniqueness, you and I can not experience life in precisely the same way. Factors such as upbringing, education, culture, socioeconomic background, and personal experiences shape our different perspectives, values, and behaviors, making each of us even more unique.

You and I are an exclusive combination of personality traits, influenced by genetics, environment, and individual experiences. My traits, such as introversion, disagreeableness, conscientiousness, openness, and even my neuroses, all differ from yours.

I have different talents and skills—not better or more valuable than yours. These talents and skills are not transferable. My combination of talents and skills is simply mine alone and can only work for me and by me. You won’t see me on the VOICE, but you can catch me leading a webinar about growing old.

When you finally realize you are singular, unparalleled, incomparable, matchless, peerless, unrivaled, distinctive, exclusive, rare, unexampled, exceptional, and indeed individual, then consider and contemplate why your uniqueness exists and how this came to be. This is your opening to your Dharma.

UNCONCONCEALLING YOUR DHARMA

Dharma and karma are essential concepts in Hindu philosophy but have distinct meanings and roles. Karma is a fundamental concept in Eastern philosophies, referring to the spiritual principle of cause and effect, where intent and actions influence future outcomes. It encompasses the idea that every action (physical, mental, or emotional) has corresponding consequences in life.

Karma is a universal cosmic law that applies to all beings and phenomena, operating independently of individual beliefs, intentions, or circumstances. It is understood to uphold balance, justice, and moral order in the universe.

Karma encourages individuals to act responsibly, ethically, and compassionately. Positive actions are believed to generate beneficial outcomes, while negative actions lead to adverse consequences. It serves as a guiding principle for moral conduct, personal growth, and spiritual development in accordance with the natural laws of cause and effect.

Karma states that positive actions lead to positive outcomes, whereas negative actions result in negative repercussions. It operates on the principle of ethical justice, ensuring that individuals reap the fruits of their actions.

Dharma, on the other hand, encompasses certain principles and values that uphold the order of the universe, maintain social harmony, and guide individuals toward divinity and noble conduct.

Dharma defines how to understand your principal duty in and for the world. It comes with a strong belief in justice and trust in moral principles and laws. Dharma includes specific societal responsibilities and requires that your life make a difference to the world.

MY DHARMA

Gathering all my life experience, knowledge, and wisdom, how could I best heal the world with my talents and skills? The answer became apparent—a revelation: Bring higher wisdom into the world so healing is possible.

Elders deliver higher wisdom in their being and actions. Looking back, I have always prepared myself in some way for this calling—to bring the elder’s higher wisdom into the Western world. (This is the theme in my yet-to-be-finished memoir.)

Living my Dharma holds greater universal meaning, enshrines a noble cause, and gives me a sacred mission. My Dharma eclipses my personality, ego, identity, and inner critic. My Dharma allows alignment with Buddha’s statement, "Your work is to discover your world and then give yourself to it with all your heart."—Buddha.

On a recent podcast, I was asked, “Would you say what makes your enterprise, The Contemporary Elder Institute, unique? I answered, ”Our work is about having people realize their Dharma and support them in living their Dharma. And when you look at our members today, this is undeniably correct. Members have found their Dharma, their purpose and mission, the reason they were put on the planet, and they are living it, and so am I.

Maybe Dharma is the ultimate cosmic gift; it might be time for you to open your gift.

ANNOUNCEMENT

Next open Sangha call - April 24th, 4:00 pm PT. Topic Relationships / Relatedness. Guests Register Here: https://form.jotform.com/230334570253044

Relationship - Relatedness

Thu, 04 Apr 2024 12:00:00 GMT

Relationship - Relatedness

Who I am in the world is a function of my relationships.

What is your relationship to your mind?

What is your relationship to your past?

What is your relationship to your identity?

What is your relationship to your heart?

What is your relationship to your soul?

Whatis your relationship to Self?

What is your relationship to the divine?

re·la·tion·ship (noun)

the way in which two or more concepts, objects, or people are connected, or the state of being connected.

We open the next series of Sangha calls on the phenomenon of relationships—relationships with people and situations outside of yourself and relationships inside yourself.

Alchemy

by Amba Gale

You came in as an asking,

a particular longing for,

a blessing invoked, a prayer.

There was no casual about it.

You knew you needed to save your life.

You, in particular,

needed this, wanted this,

wanted more than anything,

this conversation with your heart.

For many months you waited for the symphony to begin,

while all the while you gathered the instruments,

the unique sounds of your own song

not your mother’s

or your father’s

but yours.

You created the notes, the chords, the themes

that would carry you through the passage.

Your soul was thirsty, and you drank, as you created courage, and told the truth.

Kept telling the truth, into the well of safety.

Reached down, even, to where you were shy

of telling the truth.

Reached out, beyond yourself, each time, and found that you were still loved.

Magically, alchemically,

the pure waters of your deep well within

met your blessing,

as the other orchestral voices joined your song.

Together, and as one, you swirled and swirled, round and round, in those loving, listening waters,

transforming, and transforming once again who you were,

who you are

to be in this life.

Finally,

you became a burning torch

and could walk out of the dark forest of dreariness from which you came.

A light, now,

stepping out into your new world,

free,

healed,

married to your soul.

The next Sangha call is for Members only on April 10th, 4:00 pm PT. (You will receive reminder email the day of.)

The open Sangha call is on April 24th. Join us: https://form.jotform.com/230334570253044

Day 4 - MIND TO HEART

Wed, 27 Mar 2024 14:17:25 GMT

Day 4 - MIND TO HEART

The ancient and powerful impact of drumming let loose the Western, rational mind.

From sands on the ocean floor, compressed into rock layers over thousands of years, only to return to its original form.

Just like us.

Listening to the river, the rock, the grass, shrubs, and the mountains—hearing their voices and quieting ours.

Photos by Elder Council Member Ed Sancious

NEXT RETREAT - 2025
The next retreat is in March/April 2025, in Kauai, Hawaii
Registration will open in mid-September.
Space will be limited.
A brief clearing call with an Elder Council Member is required to complete registration.

What We Gain When We Learn to Let Go

Mon, 25 Mar 2024 16:43:35 GMT

What We Gain When We Learn to Let Go

A meditation By Gil Fronsdal

There are two sides to this Buddhist practice: letting go of something and letting go into something.

Letting go is an important practice in everyday life, as well as on the path of liberation. Daily life provides innumerable small and large occasions for letting go of plans, desires, preferences, and opinions. It can be as simple as when the weather changes, and we abandon plans we had for the day. Or it can be as complex as deciding what to sacrifice, when pulled between the needs of family, friends, career, community, or spiritual practice. Daily life provides many situations where letting go is appropriate, or even required. Learning how to do so skillfully is essential to a happy life.

Buddhist practice leads to a letting go that is more demanding than what ordinary life usually requires. Beyond relinquishing particular desires and opinions, we practice letting go of the underlying compulsion to cling to desires and opinions. The liberation of Buddhism is not just letting go of outdated and inaccurate self-concepts; it also involves giving up a core conceit that causes us to cling to ideas of who we are or aren’t. Liberation is releasing the deepest attachments we have.

The practice of letting go is often mistrusted. One good reason for this mistrust is because, without wisdom, it is easy to let go of the wrong things; for example, when we let go of such healthy pursuits as exercising or eating well, instead of our clinging to those pursuits. Another reason for mistrust, is that letting go, or renunciation, can suggest deprivation, weakness, and personal diminishment if we think we have to abandon our views and wishes in favor of the views and wishes of others.

It is possible to let go either of a thing or of the grasping we have to that thing. In some circumstances, it is appropriate to give something up. In others, it is more important to let go of the grasping. When someone is addicted to alcohol, it is necessary to renounce alcohol. However, when someone is clinging to the past, it is not the past that needs to be abandoned, rather it is the clinging. If the past is rejected, it can’t be a source of understanding. When there is no clinging to it, it is easier to learn the lessons the past provides.

At times, it is important to understand the shortcomings of what we are clinging to before we are able to let go. This may require investigation into the nature of what we are holding on to. For example, many people have found it easier to let go of arrogance when they see clearly the effect it has on one’s relationships with others. When we see clearly what money can and can’t do for us, it can be easier to let go of the idea that money will give us a meaningful life.

Sometimes it is more important to understand the shortcomings of the grasping itself rather than the object of grasping. Grasping always hurts. It is the primary source of suffering. It limits how well we can see what is happening. When it is strong, clinging can cause us to lose touch with ourselves. It interferes with our ability to be flexible and creative and it can be a trigger for afflictive emotions.

By investigating both the grasping itself and the object of our grasping, it becomes possible to know which of these we need to let go of. If the object of grasping is harmful, then we let go of that. If the object of grasping is beneficial, then we can let go of the grasping so that what is beneficial remains. Helping a neighbor, caring for your own health and welfare, or enjoying nature can be done with or without clinging. It is accomplished much better without the clinging.

The Buddhist practice of letting go has two important sides that fit together like the front and back of one’s hand. The first side, which is the better known, is letting go of something. The second side is letting go into something. The two sides work together like letting go of the diving board while dropping into the pool, or giving up impatience and then relaxing into the resulting ease.

While letting go can be extremely beneficial, the practice can be even more significant when we also learn to let go into something valuable. From this side, letting go is more about what is gained than what is lost. When we let go of fear, it may also be possible to let go into a sense of safety or a sense of relaxation. Forsaking the need to be right or to have one’s opinions justified can allow a person to settle into a feeling of peace. Letting go of thoughts might allow us to open to a calmer mind. By letting go into something beneficial, it can be easier to let go of something harmful. At times, people don’t want to let go because they don’t see the alternative as better than what they are holding on to. When something is clearly gained by letting go, it can be easier to do so.

A wonderful result of letting go is to experience each moment as being enough, just as it is.

We can see the Buddhist emphasis on what is gained through letting go by how the tradition understands renunciation. While the English word implies giving something up, the Buddhist analogy for renunciation is to go out from a place that is confined and dusty into a wide-open, clear space. It is as if you have been in a one-room cabin with your relatives, snowed in for an entire winter. While you may love your relatives, what is gained when you open the door and get out into the spring probably feels exquisite.

One of the nice things about letting go into something is that it has less to do with willing something or creating something than it does with allowing or relaxing. Once we know how to swim, it can be relaxing to float by allowing the water to hold us up. Once we know how to have compassion, there may be times when we not only let go of ill-will but also let go into a sense of empathy. Letting go of fear, may then also be resting back into a sense of calm.

A wonderful result of letting go is to experience each moment as being enough, just as it is. It allows us to be present for our experience here and now with such clarity and freedom that this very moment stands out as something profound and significant. We can let go of the headlong rush into the future, as well as the various, imaginative ways we think, “I’m not enough” or “this moment is not good enough,” so we can discover a well-being and peace not dependent on what we want or believe.

A fruit of Buddhist practice is to have available a greater range of wholesome, beautiful, and meaningful inner states to let go into. In particular, one can come to know a pervasive peace, accessible through both letting go and letting go into. The full maturity of this peace is when we let go of our self as the person experiencing the peace. With no self, there is just peace.

THE 2024 SANGHA RETREAT: Day 2 + 3

Mon, 25 Mar 2024 13:00:06 GMT

Day 2 – KNOWING THE MIND

Day 2 - The mind. Becoming aware of its design, function, and structure. Today was about the lower levels of the mind and how it operates and can often dominate. Through meditation, we are able to be with this level of mind in a more objective way.

Through hikes through nature, the mind let's go. The mind moves from subjective to objective.

And with the mind now known for what it is and how it operates, we can let that go and be with people in a way that allows our deepest humanity to surface.

Day 3 - THE POWER OF ELDERS

Elders standing together, shoulder to shoulder, cast a big shadow.

Hearing the Other Voice

Refection - Self-Understanding - Finding Your Purpose

Photos by Elder Council Member Ed Sancious

NEXT RETREAT - 2025
The next retreat is in March/April 2025, in Kauai, Hawaii
Registration will open in mid-September.
Space will be limited.
A brief clearing call with an Elder Council Member is required to complete registration.

THE SANGHA RETREAT

Fri, 22 Mar 2024 19:35:45 GMT

THE SANGHA RETREAT

Getting Ourselves Ready - Day 1

We began with cleansing and clearing processes in order to generate a sanctuary where each participant could begin their transformational journey without the burden of their past, and their old self, readying ourselves for yoga, meditations, nature hikes, journaling, inquiry, and reflection.

We all participated in a smudging ceremony to clear ourselves and the space. The smudging was delivered by a elder and shaman of the indigenous Native American tribe here at Zion. The ceremony also allowed us to bring forth the spirits from all four directions South, East, West and North, heaven and earth to guide us on our journey.

We also performed another ceremony using a Native American "talking stick." The talking stick is an ancient totem that when held insists you tell your deepest truth. We passed the talking stick, one to another, and asked each to be "wise and to only speak wisdom." And after each participant spoke they ended their sharing with "I have spoken," and then passed the talking stick to the next person.

We are now ready for the next steps on this journey from older to elder, from age to sage, to discover our dharma, to open ourselves to that which is greater than ourselves.

Day 2: Today we enter the park to be in the magnificent and awe-inspiring space of this remarkable place, a shrine of nature, the spirits of the mountains, and the deepening kinship of the Sangha.

NEXT RETREAT - 2025

The next retreat is in March/April 2025, in Kauai, Hawaii

Registration will open in mid-September. Space will be limited.

A brief clearing call with an Elder Council Member is required to complete registration.

THE 2024 CEI SANGHA RETREAT

Mon, 18 Mar 2024 12:12:57 GMT

THE 2024 CEI SANGHA RETREAT

Our retreats mark both a beginning and an end—an end of who we have created ourselves to be and a new beginning to continue our conscious transmogrification to our higher selves.

THE RETREAT

From sacred silence, the Sangha opens the retreat,

Beneath ancient peaks, where wisdom and spirit meet.

Boundless whispers of ancient wisdom’s lore,

Guiding each to the nameless creator’s core.

Through mountain paths, where shadows dance,

We find our truth with an unobstructed glance.

Away from the chaos, the retreat provides more,

Finding the divine residing in our core.

In nature, yoga and meditation’s embrace,

We journey inward to the mysterious holy place.

Where the soul and divine are intuitively known,

Allowing our genuine essence to be forever shown.

The Intended Results of the Retreat:

The Intended Result

OMG will mean something very different for participants after the retreat.

Dates: March 21 ^st to March 26 ^th , 2024 (Sold Out)

Zion National Park

Nama-Stay Retreat Center

Retreat led by the Elder Council of Sangha

Drumming and Chanting Ceremonies by Native American Elders

https://www.requestingwisdom.com/retreat

NEXT RETREAT - 2025

The next retreat is in March/April 2025, in Kauai, Hawaii

Registration will open in mid-September.

Space will be limited.

A brief clearing call with an Elder Council Member is required to complete registration.

RETREAT WEATHER 2024

check WEBSITE FOR CLOTHING AND GEAR RECOMMENDATIONS

https://www.requestingwisdom.com/important-information-and-checklist

REMEMBER

The retreat is a precious space, a sanctuary, a sacred community of people seeking self-discovery, self-understanding, self-awareness, and divinity.

The retreat is a transformational space where past roles and identities get laid to rest.

The retreat is a sacred space where you remember who you have always been but have forgotten.

In remembering, you will peel away those layers that were never really yours in the first place—the layers you needed to operate successfully in your family, your career, and this Western culture. These many layers have served you well but are no longer needed as you grow old. These layers now interfere with living your most genuine self.

With the horizon fast approaching, you can’t afford to keep these old layers. It's time for a new coat.

See you on the other side where rainbows never die.

BEING COMPLETE WITH GROWING OLD

Thu, 14 Mar 2024 18:30:49 GMT

BEING COMPLETE WITH GROWING OLD

Being complete with a person, issue, or situation gives you a deep sense of rest. As a contemporary elder, I consciously worked on my capacity to be complete with my past, my previous identities and roles, and my assessments and judgments of myself and others.

But where I wasn’t at rest, where I had insomnia, was the issue of growing old. I needed to get complete with “growing old” because the truth was, I was getting old.

When I am complete, I feel fulfilled, I experience harmony, and I feel satisfied with myself and my life. This encompasses emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual completeness. And I knew I wasn’t even close when it came to growing old.

I didn’t want to grow old in the direction and future of the cultural conversations, my family’s and friends' conversations, and my mind’s conversations about growing old. They all message that growing old is a curse.

As an elder, I knew getting complete with an issue would close off those derogatory and disempowering conversations. But it was obvious that my gate was fully open to these undermining, devaluing, debilitating, and depressing conversations about growing old.

So, the mission became clear: get complete about growing old.

Complete as a verb means “finish making or doing; make something whole or perfect.” When I can relate to something as complete, I can see ‘it’ as whole or perfect. This moves me from the subjective to the objective, from here to out there, personal to impartial, individual to unbiased. When I am complete, I become untethered, unstrapped, and unleashed from the issue.

No matter what ‘it’ is, the ‘it’ doesn’t go away. But when I’m complete with ‘it,’ the associated thoughts don’t grab and pull and push me around. The emotional charge discharges. The mountain becomes a molehill.

Being complete allows me to consciously unhook from those thoughts and feelings that drag me around: anger, jealousy, revenge, sabotage, gossip, fear, and retaliation. I can now be with the ‘it,’ but when complete, I am free of “its” attractions and aversions. Suffering stops.

My method was to adhere to both parts of the definition of complete: "finish making or doing.” So, over time, I stopped acting. I stopped spending my time, money, and anxiety avoiding the issue of growing old. Completion begins with acceptance. The unavoidable truth, “I was getting old.”

To be complete with getting old, I had to shift my thoughts and emotions about growing old. But first, I had to observe these thoughts and emotions as they occurred. I had to focus my attention, intention, meditation, and reflection on recognizing my thoughts, emotions, and concepts about who I was, my unexamined but very present thoughts, and feelings about growing old.

The process of completion reorientated me to the inevitable physical and mental issues that happen as you get old, some beginning now for me. By being complete, I can now deal with these old-age issues in a very different manner. The issues are something I have, not something I am.

I followed the definition by making growing old appear “whole and perfect.” That was a most challenging hurdle. Stepping out of the box with its cacophony of cultural and family conversations, casting growing old as a problem and a disaster, and seeing it as “whole and perfect” was a steep and arduous climb.

I had to confront my fears of becoming frail, vulnerable, dependent, and less able. I had to face that’s precisely what will happen—unavoidable, irrevocable, unstoppable. Growing old wasn’t going to change. Being complete with growing would change me.

I couldn’t complete things outside myself until I completed them within myself—the good parts, the bad parts, the unfulfilled parts, the shame, blame, guilt parts, the stupid parts, the unacknowledged parts—they all had to go into this whole.

I had to acknowledge myself as the final package with total self-acceptance. To complete, I had to stand on the foundation of “this is it.” This is me, this is my life, and this is what happens as I grow old.

Being complete with growing old ended the resistance, avoidance, self-deception, and pretense about growing old. When I became complete with growing old, I saw a much more appealing and empowering future available for me in aging.

This poem from T.S. Eliot’s poem “The Little Gidding: The Four Quartets” is what being complete offers:

“What we call the beginning is often the end.

And to make an end is to make a beginning.

The end is where we start from.”

By becoming complete with growing old, I am now realizing some extraordinary benefits: wisdom, a sage perspective, emotional stability, self-acceptance, stronger relationships, increased gratitude, and ongoing personal and spiritual growth.

If you are lucky, you will grow old. Growing old leads to dying and ends in death. Being complete with growing old and its consequences generates immense freedom in the present. And ultimately, the present is all you really have.

INFORM & INVITATION

The 2024 Contemporary Elder Retreat

The 2025 Contemporary Elder Retreat – March/April 2025. Kauai, Hawaii (Registration open September 2024. Space is Limited)

Next Open Sangha call for members and guests , April 24 ^th .

“WHAT'S LOVE GOT TO DO WITH IT.” PART I OF II – HATE

Thu, 07 Mar 2024 18:39:24 GMT

“WHAT'S LOVE GOT TO DO WITH IT.”

PART I OF II – HATE

There is an unacknowledged disconnect between who we are about love and what religions, noted Philosophers, poets, and aboriginal elders say about love.

This disconnect might be why, here in 2024, in the good old U.S.A., we live in hate from sea to shining sea. East Coast, Midwest, East Coast, West Coast; white, black, brown or yellow, Red or Blue, each other, the intensity of the hate is now palpable.

When I ask myself, “Do I want to live in hate, the answer is “no,” as I reflect on what living in an ecosystem of hate does to me. When I asked others this question, they had the same response. Then why are we generating more and more hate?

Yes, I understand polarities and dualities. You can’t have an up without a down, an in without an out, or hate without love. Today, the hockey team of Hate is up 3 to 0 in the third period, with less than 6 minutes to go in the game, while Love’s star player is stuck in the penalty box.

With hate, there is more conflict and violence, more division and polarization, more psychological harm, more stifled progress, more halted cohesion, and more deepening prejudice and discrimination. Feelings of hate have gone viral. Feels like we are in a hate pandemic.

But what kind of love are we talking about here to counter hate? Not just what you and I mean by love on an interpersonal level, but love on a level how poets, mystics, philosophers, and spiritual figures mean it.

According to Plato in his Symposium, there are three levels of love.

Eros (Passionate Love): Eros represents love's physical and passionate aspect. It is characterized by desire, attraction, and longing for physical union with another person. Eros is romantic love; the initial stages of a romantic relationship are when intense desire and infatuation exist. We’ve all been there.

Philia (Affectionate Love): Philia is a deeper, more mature form of love characterized by friendship, goodwill, and mutual respect. It is the love between friends, family members, and individuals who share common interests and values. Philia is based on companionship, trust, and shared experiences rather than physical attraction. Some of us get to this stage of love.

According to Plato’s framework, Agape (Unconditional Love) is the most selfless form of love. It is often described as unconditional love or divine love. Agape transcends personal desires and interests and is characterized by selflessness, compassion, and altruism. It involves caring for others without expecting anything in return and extends to all beings, regardless of their relationship to oneself. Our society “ain’t feeling” this love.

It becomes apparent that this unconditional love, this divine love, is precisely what is missing to counter hate.

So first, let’s get straight to what the divine say about this kind of love.

Christ

1. "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind." - Matthew 22:37 (NIV)

2. "Love your neighbor as yourself." - Matthew 22:39 (NIV)

3. "A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another." - John 13:34 (NIV)

4. "Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends." - John 15:13 (NIV)

5. "But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Highest because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked." - Luke 6:35 (NIV)

6. "This is my command: Love each other." - John 15:17 (NIV)

Buddha

1. "Hatred does not cease by hatred, but only by love; this is the eternal rule."

2. "Radiate boundless love towards the entire world."

3. "In the end, only three things matter: how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you."

4. "You, yourself, as much as anybody in the universe, deserve your love and affection."

5. "Thousands of candles can be lit from a single candle, and the candle's life will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared."

6. "In the sky, there is no distinction of east and west; people create distinctions out of their minds and then believe them to be true."

Muhammad

1. Love for Allah (God): Muslims are taught to love Allah with all their hearts, and this love is often described as the highest form of love.

2. Love for Humanity: Mohammad taught Muslims to love and show compassion towards all human beings regardless of race, religion, or social status. This love is expressed through acts of kindness, charity, and empathy.

3. Love in Relationships: Mohammad emphasized the importance of love, respect, and kindness in all relationships, including marriages, families, and friendships. He taught that spouses should love and care for each other, parents should love and nurture their children, and individuals should treat others with love and respect.

4. Love for Creation: Muslims are taught to appreciate and care for the natural world as a manifestation of Allah's love and creativity. Mohammad encouraged his followers to be stewards of the Earth and to show respect and kindness towards animals and the environment.

5. Forgiveness and Mercy: Mohammad taught the importance of forgiveness and mercy in relationships. Muslims are encouraged to forgive those who wrong them and to show mercy towards others, even in difficult situations.

They all exclaim the very same thing. Christ, Buddha, and Muhammad emphasize the centrality of love in one's relationship with God, others, and our various aspects of being human. Divine love is inherently selfless, focused on the well-being and happiness of others rather than personal gain or benefit.

Why can’t divine love exist in our heads, hearts, families, relationships, and culture? Today, divine love is counterculture. What is behind this concrete wall of resistance to unconditional love, divine love?

The answer is the ego. When you examine the ego of Westerners, you understand “why” we have great difficulty with divine love.

“WHAT’S LOVE GOT TO DO WITH IT”

PART II of II - DIVINE LOVE KEEP OUT

When you examine the makeup of the West's ego, the “why” we have difficulty with divine love becomes readily apparent. You need to look under ego’s hood to get to this more profound understanding.

Let’s look.

• The ego tells you who you think you are, who you understand yourself to be. The ego defines all that you are. Divine love has no place in this restricted airspace.

• The ego is a survivalist, built to protect itself. Divine love has a hard time getting through the protective barrier. No permeability.

• The ego is fragile. It takes everything personally and is not open to self-truth. Divine love does not nest where truth is avoided.

• The ego abstains from responsibility by deploying guilt, blame, shame, gossip, and excuses. Divine love doesn’t do well in this dialect.

• The ego always thinks it’s right. Even when the ego thinks it's wrong, it’s right about being wrong. Divine love can’t exist in righteousness.

• The ego stays alive by comparing itself to others. It judges, assesses, evaluates, appraises, and gauges. Divine love can’t be compared.

• The ego is an isolationist. It doesn’t even trust itself. Divine love can’t appear if faith isn’t possible.

• The ego is always self-referential. Pronouns of “I, me, my” are the source of most thoughts. Divine love can’t manifest when the “I” thinks that’s all there is.

• The ego always makes people into objects, making themselves an object. Divine love can’t be understood as an object.

• The ego determines self-esteem, self-importance, and identity. But self-esteem, self-importance, and identity are all relationship-based, not ‘stand-alone.’ Anything that reveals “it ain't so” about the ego is never invited, so divine love never receives an invitation.

• The ego thrives on recognition and validation. Relationships that increase acceptance and recognition become key. Love therefore is totally conditional. Divine love is unconditional.

• The ego resists personal discovery, honest self-inquiry, and deeper self-understanding. The ego doesn’t want to be found out. Divine love wants you to tell yourself the brutal truths.

So, what chance does divine love have when the ego writes, directs, and produces the entire show?

AS CONTEMPORARY ELDERS, WHAT WE ARE DOING ABOUT HATE

Elders have egos, and they never go away. But elders realize they also have hands, feet, and legs. For elders, egos become what we have, not who we are. The ego becomes an appendage rather than the whole. The ego moves from master to body part.

Now, there’s some room for divine love to occur, which it does. Divine love is inside, waiting to get out, but the ego takes up all the room.

Elders accept themselves with less stickiness of self-judgment and self-criticism. This allows a neutral view of strengths and weaknesses. These things don’t need to change; they need to be as they are because they aren’t going to change. Divine love is unconditional, so you can stop trying to be perfect.

Most see the divine spirit as some entity, form, or object that their conceptual mind can understand. But when you can get past the barriers of the egoic mind, the rational mind, and the intellect, you’ll see divine love between the forms, not just the form itself. You get to understand and appreciate the hole “shebang.”

ANNOUNCEMENTS

PRESS RELEASE: Dr. Marc Cooper of The Contemporary Elder Institute Honored

Thu, 07 Mar 2024 17:57:16 GMT

Dr. Marc Cooper of The Contemporary Elder Institute Honored As 

Northwest Portland 2024 Local Businessperson of The Year  

Portland OR: March 5, 2024 -- Alignable’s 2024 Local Business Person Of The Year Contest reached unparalleled participation levels, logging a whopping 309,000+ votes, 64,000+ recommendations, and an unheard-of number of local winners – over 5,100 across the U.S. and Canada.

The largest online networking platform for business owners, Alignable.com invited its 8.7 million+ members to shout-out local business leaders who’ve gone above and beyond guiding peers and supporting entire communities, amid challenging economic conditions.

Today, Alignable’s network announces that Dr. Marc Cooper, Fonder and Chairman of the Elder Council of the Contemporary Elder Institute has been elected as Northwest Portland 2024 Business Person of The Year!  

The 2024 contest is the most popular competition Alignable has hosted over five years, marking a 40% jump in participation over 2023. 

During the 2024 contest, which ran from Jan. 8 to Feb. 23, 2024, 5,171 business owners emerged as winners (including ties), across 4,820 communities. That’s an increase of 1,195 additional Local Business People in 2024 compared to 2023.

These leaders were commended for helping their peers and communities through a year with many challenges, including rising interest rates and rents, not to mention skyrocketing supply costs.

“In our local business community, we look out for each other and refer businesses down the street or around the corner to help make everyone in town as successful as possible,” said Dr. Cooper. “And the challenges we’ve all encountered have compelled many of us to offer counsel to peers fighting to keep their businesses afloat. While I’m thrilled to receive this award, it’s a testament to our entire community.”

Dr. Cooper received a special badge on) an Alignable profile, recognizing this big win. In past years, the awareness generated through similar contests has spurred expanded connections and new business for many winners. 

Driving Recognition, Relationships & Referrals

“Our members can't stop raving about how this contest supercharged the relationships within their networks, which have sparked referrals, ignited fresh business opportunities, and fueled an unstoppable wave of mutual support," said Eric Groves, CEO and Co-Founder of Alignable. “Small business owners are the vibrant heartbeat of their communities, and it's high time they got the recognition they deserve. With over 64,000 recommendations pouring in from this year's contest, it's crystal clear: when small business owners unite, they become an unstoppable force."

To arrange interviews with Dr. Marc Cooper, please schedule through his website www.requestingwisdom.com and/or an Alignable representative. Don't hesitate to contact Chuck Casto at chuck@alignable.com. He can also offer JPEGs, other visuals, and local winner testimonials. 

About The Contemporary Elder Institute

The Contemporary Elder Institute is a Social Enterprise transforming growing old in our Western culture, from resignation to possibility, from useless to purpose, from weakness to strength, from voiceless to empowered, from disregarded to invited, from inconsequential to making a profound difference.

About Alignable

Alignable.com is the largest online business networking platform for business owners in the U.S. and Canada. With 8.7 million members across 35,000+ communities, Alignable is the network where business owners come together. Whether you’re connecting locally, meeting peers in your industry, or finding a catalyst who will introduce you to their network, Alignable is where businesses connect and change their business trajectory.  

WHO ARE YOU? OVERCOMING or ACCEPTING

Thu, 29 Feb 2024 22:28:22 GMT

WHO ARE YOU? OVERCOMING or ACCEPTING

Overcoming and accepting are two distinct approaches to obstacles, difficulties, and problems. I’ve been thoroughly indoctrinated and have actively practiced overcoming for many years. I’m a blackbelt in overcoming.

Accepting has not been easy for me, given my Western cultural programming, professional career path training and development, and my family history. Overcoming was my only mantra.

Overcome means “succeed in dealing with a problem or difficulty; prevail; overpower.” Synonyms for overcome: “control, tame, master, conquer, defeat, vanquish, beat, best, subdue, triumph.” Seems overcoming produces a context of combat, which makes me a combatant, someone engaged in a war.

Furthermore, I grew up in the post-World War II American culture steeped in individualistic ideologies, emphasizing personal agency and autonomy, pursuing financial success, and becoming noticeably recognized. High test fuel to operate in overcoming.

The cultural narratives, movies, books, podcasts, and social media all loudly celebrate overcoming adversity. We praise perseverance and admire the ability to overcome hurdles. We applaud characters that have faced their hardships, ultimately conquering them.

I grew up on the Lone Ranger, Green Hornet, the Shadow, and Superman on my GE radio, sitting on my bedroom nightstand. Overcoming was media indoctrination from the very beginning. Heros always overcome.

Then, there was the overlying family history. Father, a first-generation Jew, left in the middle of the night at age 11 as the only male in the family with his mother, Sarah, and his older sister, Florence. Escaping a Russian-occupied village near Odessa, a village that had just suffered a pogrom where half the village had been massacred.

Across a frozen river, ultimately through Austria, France, and England for his journey to America. Relegated to Steerage with hundreds of other immigrant families on a boat for days. Finally, Ellis Island only to have his ancestral family name Americanized before entrée.

That was my father’s experience in 1921. That was my heritage. Sidney Cooper fought hard to become an upwardly mobile middle-class individual, and he did it as a Jew. He had much to overcome. Overcoming was in my blood and reinforced by everything and everyone around me.

Overcoming obstacles fits the belief that we can aggressively take charge of our destiny, set goals, and diligently achieve them. The center of the American Dream, which claims to be achievable by any American through diligence and hard work. The American Dream emphasizes overcoming as one of its core operating principles.

Overcoming calls for strong and focused, strident effort against something or someone. But what is baked into the overcoming formula is “something is wrong here; something is wrong with “them, it, or me.” Usually, them, but if you’re Jewish, me.

Something is not right. Something must be changed. So, inherent in overcoming is it “shouldn’t be this way” or “I shouldn’t be this way.” Whichever or whatever needs to overcome “shouldn’t be.”

But when carefully and consciously examined, under the hood of overcoming, and all the “shoulds and shouldn’t be’s” is the ego. The ego is who you think you are. Your identity, beliefs, desires, and perceptions. The ego is hugely insecure and requires validation and adoration. When you overcome, the ego gets its dopamine fix.

But the fix doesn’t last. You come down. So, you must do it again – and again and again and again.

Overcoming shaped my life, personality, career, and who I was. But then, as I aged, I started to look at the balance sheet more carefully. The costs were getting bigger, and the benefits were shrinking.

MY COSTS, AND MAYBE YOURS, OF OVERCOMING

My experiences of overcoming created an unrecognized yet insistent self-induced pressure to achieve. This pressure led to veiled stress with occasional light touches of anxiety. The spring in this clock always had to be wound. The pressure from overcoming kept the spring tense and preloaded.

The knob to wind the clock was my inner critic, with its “flaw-identifier,” the ego’s deadliest weapon, kept me in tow.

What went missing for me when I was in the throes of overcoming was “possibility.” When you’re overcoming, the future gets very narrow. Only one destination. There is no time to look up and see the trees, streams, or sky walking the rocky overcome trail. You’re afraid you might fail or falter. Head down. Trudge onward, overcoming the narrows life.

While overcoming, I noticed my resistance to acknowledging and expressing emotions. In overcoming, I needed to suppress complicated feelings rather than be with them as part of my human experience. Close-down feelings allowed me to plow ahead.

As I began to look for greater contentment and freedom, overcoming was certainly losing its appeal.

Fortunately, I eventually encountered my mystical and spiritual teachers. What I noticed was that they weren’t overcoming anything. Life seemed effortless. They could go with the flow and make it happen somehow using the flow. There was no suffering, struggle, or drama.

How did they do that?

Unlike our Western culture, these mystical and spiritual teachers did not hold acceptance as a passive act. Acceptance required a higher consciousness, a wiser awareness, and a sense of the divine.

They held acceptance as a strength, not a weakness. They saw acceptance as empowering rather than succumbing, capitulating, or conceding.

These mystics and teachers knew that acceptance occurs in a different temporality. Overcoming has urgency with short-term aims. It became evident that overcoming didn’t make me happier, more content, expand my sense of peace, or allow greater unrestricted freedom and self-expression.

What became evident was that acceptance was far more unhurried. Since everything changes, acceptance could wait for the right time to make the best moves to alter the future. Or take no action because it would go away on its own. Didn’t need any intervention.

Acceptance had no strain.

When practiced, acceptance puts me in the right place, at the right time, with the right people, and the actions are effortless because they are the right actions. Acceptance requires wisdom, and wisdom always knows “when.” When practice acceptance, my higher wisdom emerges. For me, that’s the most significant benefit.

LET AI LAY IT OUT FOR YOU (OpenAI)

ACCEPTANCE IS A PRACTICE

Acceptance enables me to let things be, let people be, and let myself be. Acceptance sweeps away judgment, assessment, and issuing a verdict.

What I have discovered about acceptance is that I no longer feel resistance; instead, I feel resilience. I don’t get stuck in a cycle of frustration or despair over things I can’t amend.

Acceptance trains me in patience, yielding more surface area for insight and self-understanding. I am much easier to get along with because I have come to accept myself, my whole self, benevolently. I can accept reality as it is, allowing me to accept others more readily and graciously.

But for me, the most significant benefit of acceptance is on the metaphysical side. When I can fully accept who I am and how the world is, I begin to see more with Divinity's eyes.

Acceptance

God in His infinite wisdom

Did not make me very wise -

So when my actions are stupid

They hardly take God by surprise.

Langston Hughes

NOTICES

Add the Sangha calls to your week - so you remember.

Try just one of these conscious-raising encounters and notice its impact. See what happens when you listen to one of these. It might be just what you need.

Poems by Ed
Medi t ations by Judy
Benedictions by Derrill

Or add The Contemporary Elder playlist to your Spotify channel. And then listen to the lyrics.

Any of these will help you remember who you are beyond your daily life.

I also invite you to join one of our open Sangha calls.

One more space is open for the retreat if you want to jump in.

THE MISUNDERSTOOD MOMENT (8 to 9-minute read)

Thu, 22 Feb 2024 15:32:57 GMT

THE MISUNDERSTOOD MOMENT

(8 to 9-minute read)

I understand. I really do. I have the very same problem with problems you do. Because we’re highly intentional Western achievers, how you and I handle problems is the problem.

But I’ve come a long way. I’ve got some wisdom now.

Learning to become aware, awake, and conscious of my reactions to problems was essential. I hadn’t noticed before, but I finally recognized that a problem left to simmer eventually swallowed me whole.

So, I started by noticing my built-in reactions and responses to problems. I sharpened my detection of early reactions and responses before they deepened and spread. I know what happens when they go viral. I’ve had these ‘cytokine’ reactions from problems before, reactions that exacerbate anxiety and agitation.

But this ability to notice my reaction to problems early on was best achieved when I was in the “moment.” That’s when I could feel and distinguish the beginning of my responses to a problem - threat, danger, fear, and uncertainty in their primordial form. In that moment, I could witness my thoughts and feelings, while before, I was unaware or very dull to these feelings and thoughts.

Once I became conscious of the feelings and associated thoughts triggered by the problem, my first step on the path was not to find the right solution. Why? Because the solution would have been a byproduct of those programmed thoughts and feelings.

So, I’ve learned to keep my nose in but fingers out. Not to disengage, detach, or disconnect from the problem. No, to stay with it, to stay in it and self-observe, notice who I am being about the problem. Become a witness, an unbiased observer of my reactive feelings and thoughts.

Now, my process for getting to the moment is self-inquiry. There are many other methods, but this method works best for me. I’ve made self-inquiry my yoga practice. If the problem is me, and I am pre-programmed with thoughts and feelings, by self-inquiry, I move from the subjective to the objective. I separate myself from the problem.

When I use self-inquiry, I become wiser through self-understanding and calmer because I am now the audience, not the actor.

My self-inquiry methods were developed by combining East and West practices and knowledge. Over the last ten years, I have engaged In Buddhist and Hindu meditation practices called Jnana Yoga, also known as the path of wisdom. It is brilliantly designed and highly effective for thinkers like me; it is a practice that felt the right fit for me.

These Eastern meditations open my understanding of the nature of the self, reality, and the relationship between the two. Meditations that allow liberation by discriminating between the real and unreal. In these meditations, you become genuine about yourself. You remove all your self-deceptions. You get rid of your fantasies, judgments, and evaluations and are left with what is real and who you truly are in the physical, mental, and spiritual domains.

On the Western side, I studied and trained with recognized philosophical and transformational teachers who were masters in Socratic and Appreciative Inquiry. The likes of Werner Erhard, Arnold Siegel, Fernando Flores, and Charlie Smith. Their methods provided a language and system that enabled self-inquiry.

Combining Eastern and Western self-inquiry methods and models and mastering manifesting it in others has worked incredibly well for me.

Self-inquiry brings me into the present moment. Problems occur differently in form, intensity, and thought when I am in the present moment. Being in the moment allows me to resolve my problems in several ways, and as importantly, my solutions work when resolved in the moment.

· Being in the moment, I gain clarity of mind. When I’m fully present, my mind isn't cluttered with worries about the past or anxieties about the future. This clarity lets me see the situation objectively to make better decisions.

· Being present in the moment, I have focused attention. Being present in the moment lets me concentrate entirely on my problem. This undistracted focus leads to better understanding and problem-solving skills, as irrelevant thoughts don’t sidetrack me.

· Often, my problems are exacerbated by strong emotions such as fear, anger, or stress. Being in the moment allows me to regulate my emotions better and approach the problem more calmly and rationally.

· Being fully present in the moment unlocks my creativity and innovative thinking. When I’m not preoccupied with other thoughts, my mind can explore different perspectives and develop novel solutions to problems.

· Being present in the moment involves accepting the reality of the current situation without judgment. This acceptance helps me approach the problem resiliently.

· Being in the moment, I have problems they do not have me. And the me that exists in the moment is a highly effective problem solver.

MY MOMENT IS DIFFERENT THAN YOUR MOMENT

Now, I don’t mean moment like you probably mean moment. More than likely, you understand the moment as fleeting, a flicker, an instant in time that quickly disappears. This understanding fits our Western culture’s linear view of time, where past, present, and future are distinct and separate.

In our culture and, therefore, in your head, a moment is merely a tiny dash linking the past to the future or one future to another future.

Like you, I was enculturated to see a moment only as this transitory link in the chain of time, nothing more. An instantly disappearing transient. A fleeting shadow. But with diligence, I discovered there was much within a moment if I could land and stay inside.

When I remain within the moment, it becomes the all-encompassing reality, the only reality. It isn’t something that swiftly passes and then is gone. This moment has much more depth and heft. I didn’t just pass the moment’s house; I got out of the car, walked up the front steps, knocked on the door a few times, and was let inside.

What’s inside this door is self-understanding and a spiritual connection. I became conscious of my reactive parts, which I had not noticed until then. Once recognized, they could be consciously dealt with. Simultaneously, I became aware of a more hallowed essence to which I felt connected.

Being in the moment unlocks me from my ego, past, and future. And when these locks are open, I experience my original self. The unshackled me that is present for sunsets, swimming with dolphins, and falling in love.

But it takes focus and practice to access being in the moment. Thoughts of the past and the future so easily seduce. Thoughts that pull and drag you from being here now. The mind is impatient, constantly sputtering thoughts. The ego is always anxious; it doesn’t expose its underbelly.

Can I stay in the moment permanently? No, no-siree-George-Bob. Not in our culture. Not how I grew up. Not in the Western scientific, materialistic, forever-young reality I live in. Too many pulsating loud influences suck me back into either the past, the future, or my ego’s wants and needs. But now at least and at last I know the difference.

Through self-inquiry, I now understand T.S. Eliot’s message about being in the moment.

“Not known, because not looked for
But heard, half-heard, in the stillness.
Between two waves of the sea.
Quick now, here, now, always--
A condition of complete simplicity
(Costing not less than everything)
And all shall be well and
All manner of things shall be well.
When the tongues of flames are in-folded
Into the crowned knot of fire
And the fire and the rose are one.”

T.S. Eliot, "Little Gidding," in the "Four Quartets."

When I am in the moment, I can totally grasp how the “fire and rose are one.”

ANNOTATION

In The Contemporary Elder Sangha, we engage with many disciplines besides self-inquiry – Hatha Yoga, Meditation, Dharma Talks, poetry, prayer, journal writing, nature walks, aboriginal ceremonies, and shared reflections.

The Sangha enables each member to develop their own self-awareness and spiritual path. Everyone figured out how to assemble and combine their best practices to gain higher wisdom and connect spiritually.

My combo in order of time and energy sent is Self-Inquiry (Jnana Yoga), Buddhist meditation, nature walks, and Hatha Yoga. And, of course, I have adapted and modulated these practices to best work for me.

ANNOUNCEMENTS

The retreat is open to all and has 2 rooms left. If you would like to secure your spot click HERE: https://www.requestingwisdom.com/retreat

Our next Sangha call is on February 28th. This will be an Open Call. Click here to join HERE: https://form.jotform.com/230334570253044

Distinguishing Your Dharma: The Sangha’s Distinctive Competence

Thu, 15 Feb 2024 18:36:09 GMT

Distinguishing Your Dharma:

The Sangha’s Distinctive Competence

Distinctive competence is a concept often used in strategic management and organizational theory to describe the unique capabilities, skills, resources, or advantages that set a company apart from its competitors and enable it to achieve a competitive advantage in the marketplace.

Based on our Sangha members' reports, third-party observations, and testimonies, we can affirm that participating in our Sangha enables members to realize their Dharma. Recognizing your Dharma makes our particular entity distinct from all other groups in the “elder” and transformational industries in our Western ethos. Our purpose, structures, governance, and operating principles are designed for members to recognize and live their Dharma.

Dharma is not dogma. Dharma does not follow doctrine, tenet, creed, ideology, or canon. It is inside out, not outside in. You can’t teach Dharma. Dharma must be self-revealed, self-realized, self-attained, self-experienced, and self-actualized.

Dharma is your higher calling. Your higher purpose. Your raison d'etre. Your reason for being. What you were meant to do with your life. Your sacred mission. Your celestial mandate. Your divine assignment. Your ordained duty. Your holy task. Your cosmic destiny.

Most Western high achievers (I am one of them) have difficulty distinguishing their Dharma. The family relationships, career, social, and societal conversations, and the constant internal dialogue are so loud and intrusive that they drum out your capacity to recognize your Dharma.

But once these conversations are quiet, you can reach your Dharma through prayer, meditation, mindful movement, self-inquiry, and contemplation. You’ll know it's your Dharma – insight, experience, intuition, and body sensations coalesce, lock into place, and fall into perfect alignment.

And when you begin to follow your Dharma, you immediately notice the transformative impact on mind, body, and spirit. You finally know what you are here for. There is no question or even concern about it.

The soul yells, “Bingo.”

WHAT IS DHARMA and HOW THE SANGHA DOES IT

What is Dharma? Like any concept, it is contextually enshrined. But you know it’s the real, higher truth because it has existed in every culture, religion, philosophy, and poem for millennia. When the concept is centuries old and still very much existing, it’s evidence-based.

But the clincher is that Dharma is the most intimate of connections. When you realize your unique Dharma, it is something you directly experience; it resonates deep within your very self. You sense a sacred bond with your life's purpose, an intimate connection to your true calling, a heartfelt connection to your spiritual journey. You feel you finally have come home.

Dharma is a concept rooted in Hinduism, Buddhism, Jainism, and Sikhism. It also exists in Judaism and Christianity. Generally, it refers to the moral, ethical, and spiritual duties and obligations that guide an individual's conduct and behavior in alignment with the divine order and universal principles.

In Buddhism, Dharma refers to the teachings of the Buddha, as well as the natural laws and principles that govern existence. It emphasizes the path to enlightenment, which involves understanding the true nature of reality, overcoming suffering, and cultivating moral virtues such as compassion, mindfulness, and wisdom.

In Hinduism, Dharma is often described as the moral law that governs the universe, including righteousness, duty, justice, and virtue. It is considered one of the four primary goals of life (Purusharthas), along with Artha (wealth), Kama (pleasure), and Moksha (liberation). Dharma is central to Hindu philosophy, influencing social order, familial relationships, and individual conduct.

In Jainism, Dharma encompasses the moral and ethical principles that guide individuals towards spiritual liberation (moksha). It emphasizes non-violence (ahimsa), truthfulness (satya), non-attachment (aparigraha), and other virtues as essential for leading a righteous life.

In Judaism, Halakha is Jewish law, which governs every aspect of Jewish life; this includes daily rituals, moral constants, and relationships. Like Dharma, Halakha provides guidelines for ethical behavior and living in accordance with divine principles.

And like all the other concepts of Dharma, the Tikkun Olam in Judaism is the concept translated as "repairing the world," emphasizing the Jewish obligation to participate in acts of social justice and righteousness to improve society. Tikkun Olam emphasizes moral responsibility and the pursuit of harmony and justice in the world. Hence, Jewish Dharma.

In Christianity, several Christian principles and concepts are in lockstep with Dharma. The Diving Law emphasizes obedience to God's commandments and teachings. The Divine Law asks you to live following a higher moral order. Love and Compassion are central. Service and Charity stresses service to others. Most Christians hold that individuals are called to fulfill a specific Godly purpose in their lives. Christ consciousness or Dharma, “A rose by any other name.”

Martin Luther King Jr. was Christian Dharma actualized. Gandhi was Hindu Dharma realized. Ram Dass was Eastern Dharma reified in Western form. Rabbi Zalman Schecter was Jewish Dharma, understanding his divine gifts and universal mission. All plugged into the higher Dharma to realize their individual Dharma.

So, everyone agrees: Christ, Buddha, Brahman, Ram, and King David’s descendants, a Dharmic life powerfully serves self and others. And to find your own Dharma, you need to have access to a space where the higher Dharma lives. A space beyond individual religions, a space where all religions come from.

PERSONAL DHARMA

Personal Dharma, or svadharma in Sanskrit, is the concept that everyone has a unique path or duty to fulfill in life. It is based on the belief that every person is born with a specific set of talents, skills, inclinations, and responsibilities they are meant to fulfill. Personal Dharma encompasses various aspects of life, including vocation, family duties, social roles, and spiritual practices.

Personal Dharma is closely tied to the broader tenets of the higher Dharma, which refers to the cosmic order, ethics, duty, and the laws governing the universe. Personal Dharma is seen as a microcosm of this cosmic order, with everyone playing a specific role within the larger scheme of things.

In our Sangha, accessing one’s Dharma involves self-reflection, self-inquiry, introspection, mindful movement, and meditation. It involves unclenching the past but not forgetting the past. It involves shedding previous identities and masks you have worn to survive within business, family, and society. It involves opening spiritual channels. It involves finally realizing and then accepting what you have been chosen for.

No one else can have your Dharma. Once the absolute uniqueness of your Dharma is realized and accepted, you stop needing to be better than anyone else or feeling worse because you’re not somebody else. There is no better or worse. The game of life-tag is over. You’re “it,” permanently.

You are “I am the only one.” You, yes, you, are unparalleled, irreplaceable, unmatched, like no other. Our findings continue to show that recognizing and abiding by your personal Dharma delivers greater harmony, balance, and spiritual fulfillment in life.

For me, I now know my place in the world. Following my Dharma has silenced my competitive and other ego-grasping thoughts that have ruled so much of my past. Those thoughts were the makers of my masks. How can you be jealous when there is only one of you? When you know what you are here for, you let so much go. For me, Dharma is freedom.

THE HOW WE DO IT

Our Sangha has developed itself to powerfully enhance the hearing, feeling, and intuitive understanding to recognize members’ personal Dharma. We understand that Dharma is unique to each individual, so the Sangha provides internal investigations and self-directed interrogations to reveal one’s Dharma.

Your Dharma is one-of-a-kind, single, unparalleled, matchless, and unrivaled. No one other than you can have your Dharma. None before you nor none after. You're the chosen one!

We also observe that not just knowing your Dharma but living your Dharma makes the last third of life astonishing. However, what I observe is that once you discover your Dharma, you can’t help but live it.

The Sangha is a place to realize personal Dharma because the Sangha consciously and strategically exists with and inside the larger Dharma. A grander, more universal, more celestial Dharma that allows individual Dharmas to emerge fully. Our Sangha gatherings are structured to deliver practices and processes to embody this higher Dharma.

"Sangha" is a Sanskrit term that refers to a community of practitioners. Our Sangha is a group of people who follow the teachings of priests, rabbis, holy men and women, metaphysicists, and existentialists. The Sangha actively provides support, guidance, and companionship on each member's path to their Dharma.

The Sangha is that space and place where members' personal Dharma can be realized. And to provide this space, the Sangha, as a whole, stays connected to the higher Dharma.

So we can claim Dharma is our Sangha’s distinctive competence.

“In the depths of self, Dharma's call resounds,

A whisper of truth, where purpose is found.

In following your Dharma’s guiding light clear and pure,

Unrestricted freedom and equanimity endure.”

Marc Cooper

ANNOUNCEMENTS:

The retreat is open to all and has 2 rooms left. If you would like to secure your spot click HERE .

Our next Sangha call is on February 28th. This will be a n Open Call. Click here to join HERE .

Marc Cooper vs Elon Musk

Mon, 05 Feb 2024 22:58:10 GMT

Marc Cooper vs Elon Musk

OK, Elon, I’m up for this fight. Let’s get it on.

Time to wake up to the new reality. Here. Now. Humans are being metamorphosized.

We’re on the edge of being changed into a different species, a different psychodynamic genus, by unnatural means. If we do nothing, what makes us human will be altered. That’s what this fight is all about.

Elon, it is not that your mission won’t succeed. Hell, you’re Eldon Musk, creator, and magician. World’s richest man. You can push nations around. You change entire industries. With Starlink you control a war. You’ve got tremendous intellect, ridiculous creative capacities, tons of money, and immense power. You are the true Goliath to my very infinitesimal David.

And yes, I know, it’s really stupid to pick a fight with Mike Tyson in his prime when you’re an aging featherweight. But somebody has got to step into the ring.

Someone must expand the other side of your mission’s inevitable consequences so it doesn’t consume us. I am here not to defeat you because I know you can’t be stopped. But if we get devoured by your almost-certain future, we will lose what is most precious: our humanity.

You and I both know we Westerners are at the beginning of our most radical transformation. If we don’t create an equilibrium, we will be fully engulfed and lose the very unique gifts of humankind.

As you grow your side, my mission is to serve and grow the other side to keep us stable. The other side is to expand our humanity. Humanity is the primary force for equanimity, fairness, spirituality, love, higher wisdom, and eternal values. None of those live within AI’s neural networks, which will soon be AI chips in people’s heads.

What will make the world more peaceful, compassionate, and equanimous is not making brains work better and faster. AI brain chips, without a counterbalance, will make things worse.

Now, Elon, I know you’ve got the upper hand. Money. Fame. Untouchable-ness. Superiority. You’re single-name-worthy as Jordon, Beyonce, or Oprah. But hey, I’m from Philly, and Rocky has always been my hero, and here’s why:

"Maybe I can't win. Maybe the only thing I can do is just take everything he's got. But to beat me he's gonna have to kill me, and to kill me he's gotta have the guts to stand in front of me, and to do that he's gotta be willin' to die himself. I don't know if he's ready to do that. I don't know. I don't know." — Rocky Balboa

Tyranny of the Obvious

Other players on the field, such as Synchon and Blackrock Neurotech, have tested their brain chips on monkeys who can now play video games. It is apparent where this future is headed. Elon, that’s why you’re in the game. And you also know how to crush the competition. You’re never number two.

As you and Neuralink move into accelerated development of chip implants, with AI cutting Moore’s law from months to minutes, in short order, implants will be as common as cell phones to give people enhanced properties to think and perform. It’s inevitable.

Both you and I know this won’t be a one-way street. Now, and in the short term, you’ll figure out how to get the brain to think faster and clearer, given the chips' link to AI. We’ll all become like Bradley Cooper in the movie Limitless.

But Elon, I know everything that exists in form and time exists as a polarity. What is the simple definition of polarity? Polarity is a state or a condition of an atom or a molecule inherent in a body that exhibits opposite properties or powers in opposite parts or directions.

Upgradeable programming brain implants will put Alexa and the entire internet in everyone’s head. We talk to our cars now; soon, they’ll talk back. If unattended, what it means to be human will ultimately be expunged by self-advancing machine-generated algorithms.

Humanness is not programable. It’s existential, not existent. It’s metaphysical, not material. It’s out of time, not in time. It’s touched by God, not greed. I consider being human a sacred gift.

Neuralink implants will enable people to make more money, give them greater cognitive abilities, access top-grade conventional wisdom, and dramatically raise their performance and results level. Implants can impact some physiology, like compulsive eating thoughts and other additive thoughts. Who in our Western culture doesn’t want to be richer, have enhanced performance, and be skinnier? And if you can make them sexier, it totally caps the trifecta.

“Hey, how much did you say those implants cost?”

“Does my insurance cover them?”

“If we hire you, we’ll pay for your implant upgrades.”

“Forget Ozempic, our chip will have you lose weight and keep it off without drugs, but also get your lazy ass to the gym.”

“If you’re a parent and qualify, Harvard now offers the Harvard chip; click here for more information.”

The future you are creating is obvious and unstoppable. But what it means to be human, the unique gift of our humanity, is at stake. In a Western culture that doesn’t care much about humanity, the odds of winning this fight are 10 to 1. But fighters don’t fight the odds, they fight the opponent.

But I believe what every religion, philosopher, and poet has said: we are spirit animals with intellect. If we only have intellect and lose our spirit, we will lose the essential core that makes us human. For me, that core is worth fighting for.

“You gotta be willing to take the hits and not point fingers saying you ain’t where you wanna be because of him, her, or anybody. Cowards do that, and that ain’t you. You’re better than that!" — Rocky Balboa

POLARITY IS IN MY CORNER

Elon, I've got great corner men. They understand our fight strategy.

The concept of polarity in our Western philosophy is entrenched in a tradition of dualism where opposing polarities, such as mind and matter, good and evil, being and non-being, rich and poor, and now, brain chips and humanity exist.

In modern physics, polarities, or dualities such as the wave-particle duality, are persistent. Nothing exists only as itself. Duality shows up everywhere. Metaphysics sees polarities as holistic, given you can’t have one without the other.

Dualism is a constant phenomenon espoused by renowned thinkers Descartes, Plato, Hegel, and Wilber. In Taoism, the Chinese philosophical tradition, dualism is expressed as Yin and Yang. In Hindu philosophy, dualism is held as Purusha (consciousness) and Prakriti (nature).

Buddha addressed the concept of dualism in his teachings, particularly in the context of understanding suffering and the nature of reality. In the Gospel of Matthew, Jesus speaks of love contrasted to hate.

Yep, everyone agrees. Anything that has form, that exists in time and space, exists in a dualistic way. There is no “in” without an “out.”

In the context of polarity, particularly when referring to concepts like magnetism or electrical charges, the strength and equality of both poles are crucial for stability and balance.

This principle of equal strength and power is grounded in the physics of these dualistic phenomena. This is true for all polarities. You need both poles equally as strong for stability and balance.

Elon, here’s my pitch. Given that stability and balance are made stronger by strengthening both poles, I’d like Neuralink to invest a few million in my work to expand people’s humanity so chips don’t eliminate what it means to be human.

If you want to improve the world and make it safer, healthier, and more peaceful, humanity needs the “juice,” not AI brain chips.

And with your “smarts, engineering capacities, and money,” you can help me build a world where conflict, hate, chaos, righteousness, war, and starvation have a good chance of being reduced or even eliminated – because that’s the essence of humanity. The heart lives in humanity, not neural networks.

So, Eldon, rather than fight, help me out to make this fight a draw. Help me build people’s humanity; help me expand humanity as you develop your AI brain chips. You can upgrade their minds, but nothing will change without upgrading their hearts.

And like you, Elon, “You and me, we don’t even have a choice." - Apollo Creed

Elon, let me know. You can reach me through my website www.requestingwisdom.com or my LinkedIn account.

The Tragic Loss of Legacy

Fri, 26 Jan 2024 13:00:03 GMT

The Tragic L o ss of Legacy

THE COST
Our culture, politics, businesses, relationships, and even within ourselves bear an unexamined and soundless problem. A costly and injurious problem.

The problem is we are disconnected from our legacy. This estrangement from our heritage has real costs. By separating ourselves from our legacy, problems worsen, threats intensify, and discontent expands within and without.

A legacy is transmitted by or received from an ancestor or predecessor that impacts our humanity. But in our Western techno-savvy, individualistic culture, we have become completely disconnected from the power and value of our predecessors’ experience and wisdom. We’ve lost the channel to our heritage. Worse, we can’t find the remote to regain the channel.

We have become separated from what others have left behind for us to know and understand. Our arrogance is that we believe we don’t need to know because we think we already know. Arrogant of course means having an exaggerated sense of one's own importance or abilities.

Knowledge, traditions, values, and cultural inheritances are not passed on when a legacy is not transmitted. When not passed on, subsequent generations miss out on valuable insights, potentially hindering their intellectual and spiritual progress. Knowledge and wisdom gained through experience, failures, and successes wasted.

Legacy plays a crucial role in shaping individual and collective identities. When a legacy is not conveyed, individuals become disconnected from their roots, leading to a loss of identity and a weakened sense of belonging.

Legacy nourished the human roots. Nutrients are needed for a healthy human root system; ancestral knowledge, experience, and wisdom have the highest nutritional value; they access the two main root structures, the root cap (the mind) and the primary root (the heart).

Elders recognize we lack a legacy consciousness in our Western, materialistic, individualistic culture. We don’t live our lives as though every action we take today ultimately leaves its mark downriver.

CONTEMPORARY ELDERS AND THEIR LEGACY
“We are a continuum. Just as we reach back to our ancestors for our fundamental values, so we, as guardians of that legacy, must reach ahead to our children and their children. And we do so with a sense of sacredness in that reaching.” – Paul Tsogas

An anchoring attribute of a contemporary elder is we honor our forefather elders' wisdom, contributions, and spirit. We, who are now elders in this space and time, realize we are part of a well-established continuum. A continuum with deep ancestral tracks that are divinely interconnected.

As contemporary elders, being part of the elder continuum enhances our equanimity, expands our sense of freedom, allows greater self-expression, and amplifies our ability to contribute.

This continuum includes a continuous sequence, an ongoing transfer of wisdom, knowledge, and ‘chi.’ An honorable and sacred exchange, ongoing and reciprocal in nature. It's not a one-time event but a continual process that enriches the lineage of elders. A continuum that sustains the elders' traditional, timeless, and celestial lessons and wisdom.

As contemporary elders, we stand in the meaning and understanding of our legacy. We hear and hold Buddha, Christ, Krishna, and other spiritual leaders at a foundational level. Their words torque who we as elders are being.

Contemporary elders hear global leaders like Mandela, Gandhi, and Martin Luther King at a cellular level. We hear with our hearts, not just our ears. We hear unconditional truths spoken. These truths our ancestors have spoken for millennia. Lessons that never get old. Lessons that bear repeating. Lessons that use us as much as we use them.

The legacy of all our earlier elders has given us contemporary elders a unique awareness of our mortality. This moral awareness drives us to seek real meaning and purpose in our lives beyond making money, acquiring stuff, and secluding and deluding ourselves from the threats and fears radiating throughout our world today.

The legacy of our yesteryear-elders enables contemporary elders to recognize our souls. That spiritual and immaterial part of being human that is immortal. A soul is as real for elders as your hand or foot.

Expanding recognition of the soul doesn’t stop the screeching of Western psychology and attitudes about life, death, and relationships. The soul just puts these events into a different perspective. A witness rather than a defendant.

The legacy of our past elders opens the gate for contemporary elders to a sense of purpose and fulfillment in contributing to something greater than ourselves. It allows us to express our uniqueness, values, and passions, contributing to a broader narrative of our own and other’s human experiences.

The legacy of our prior elders allows us to transcend our individual existence. It provides an opening to provide a sense of continuity, allowing us to feel a very real ancestral and celestial presence.

Elder, as a distinction, now exists in hundreds of conversations across our nation and the globe. I personally participate in some of these national and global conversations. These conversations now have the horsepower to bring “elder” into existence in our Western culture.

Many groups, enterprises, organizations, conferences, books, videos (TED and YouTube), podcasts, and Websites now exist on being or becoming an elder. Many of my cohorts are now highly visible, unconditionally committed, and fully engaged in having elders sit at the table where decisions are made.

We, elders, are crossing the chasm from the unrecognized to the real. On the other side of the chasm is the cultural mainland. The Contemporary Elder Institute is among those committed rowers on the U.S. Elder boat making the crossing. We are now approaching the shoreline and getting ready to disembark.

As Victor Hugo's quote, which is often repeated, “There is nothing more powerful than an idea whose time has come.” Elder is now a time that’s come. In fact, it’s here. And what puts the power in our rowing strokes is the legacy of our forebearers.

ANNOUNCEMENTS
The Contemporary Elder Retreat – March 21-26 www.requestingwisdom.com/retreat

Next Open Zoom Sangha Gathering February 28th @ 4:00 pm PT / 7:00 pm ET

Have your guests register at https://form.jotform.com/230334570253044

If previously attended as guest, you will receive a Zoom invite.

Road Not Taken

Mon, 15 Jan 2024 14:41:35 GMT

The Road Not Taken

“Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,

And having perhaps the better claim,

Because it was grassy and wanted wear;

Though as for that the passing there

Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay

In leaves no step had trodden black.

Oh, I kept the first for another day!

Yet knowing how way leads on to way,

I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—

I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.”

- Rober Frost - The Atlantic Monthly (1915) Mountain Interval (1916).

Being an elder has been my path for some time. The path was initially challenging, given my enculturation into the materialistic, mechanistic, profit-motivated, youth-oriented, ‘more is better,’ get it while you can culture in which I grew up and lived. A cultural system with little, if any, regard for what elders provide. A system that honors knowledge but distains higher wisdom.

But there was always an unrecognized gap in my life, something missing until I began spending time with elders. There was something in attendance with them that wasn’t yet fully awakened but was becoming more acutely alert.

One apparent mutual property among elders was a deep spirituality that influenced every aspect of their lives and teachings. It was palpable that these elders lived according to deeply instilled principles, values, and teachings. Principles, values, and teachings that were timeless and foundational, connecting them to a higher power.

Living consistent with these principles, values, and teachings became my challenge. My progress notes reported two steps forward, one step back, and sometimes three steps back. But the older I got, the easier it became to think and act according to these principles, values, and teachings.

So, I began to practice these principles, adopt their core values, and follow their teachings. It didn’t improve my balance sheet; assets decreased in value, liabilities increased, owner equity shrunk, and previous relationships disappeared. But from an ROI perspective, I considered the loss of revenue and now extinct relationships as investments in something else—the quality of my life.

Living with and inside these principles, values, and lessons dramatically improved the character and conditions of my life and the lives of others around me. Continuous “acquiring” didn’t give me the anticipated freedom or deliver on its promise of serenity. My investment in becoming an elder was paying off. Strong returns in well-being with an increased sense of liberty became present.

Until my early sixties, my game was to continue to climb that ladder of success so clearly defined in our Western culture – title, prestige, recognition, money, bragging rights, and possessions. But the higher the rungs on the success ladder, the greater the pull for more, bigger, or better of the same things I already had. But I dutifully continued climbing this success ladder.

But as I neared the top of this success ladder, it suddenly became readily apparent my ladder was up against the wrong building.

Now, moving a heavy past-based, ego-centric ladder wasn’t easy. The ladder weighed a ton. That took time. But I finally moved the ladder around the block to the Elder Building, and after twenty focused years, I’m finally on its rooftop.

The view from here is not Shangri-La; just the opposite, it’s raw reality. But who is looking at reality is what has been so dramatically transformed. From older eyes to elder eyes. As Marcel Proust stated, "The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes.”

Who I am as an elder amid our chronically inflamed reality would not have been possible at the top of the other building. On the rooftop of the other building, I would have been the same person, just grasping for more, better, and different of the same, again hoping this would give me freedom.

My intuition had been whispering to follow the path of the elder’s higher wisdom. Finally, the whisper turned into a roar until I finally heard it. The elder’s higher wisdom was not the wisdom for business, financial, social, or political success. Higher wisdom was another kind of wisdom that was signaling.

To access this higher wisdom, led me to participate with elders of Indigenous tribes in Mexico, British Columbia, New Mexico, and Arizona. I also attended programs, pilgrimages, sittings, and ceremonies with shamans, gurus, rabbis, poets, philosophers, and roshis. Being an elder was becoming not only knowledge-based but now anchored experience-based.

I witnessed the elder’s higher wisdom on the court. I watched how elders relate to life – their own and others. I listened closely to how they spoke and, more importantly, how they were heard. Being with elders was the most direct access to what I was seeking.

Higher wisdom was I found a profound and elevated level of understanding and firsthand knowledge. It provides a perspective that goes beyond conventional wisdom and is characterized by deeper insights into the nature of existence, consciousness, and the universe.

I witnessed that in non-Western traditional cultures, these elders were appreciatively regarded. They had earned the deep respect of their community through wisdom, harmony, and balance in their being and actions. There was a place of honor for them at the table. They were highly embraced with reverence and admiration.

But I also recognized I existed in a non-traditional Western culture that didn’t reserve a seat at the table for elders. They wouldn’t even let elders in the door. The entrance was blocked by two huge bouncers – ageism and individualism, who jammed the doorway.

The question that immediately surfaced on my climbing this elder ladder was, how do I design myself as an elder for this time, this place, and this cultural reality with its aversion to growing old and its deepening fear, anxiety, distrust, and hate? How do I be an authentic elder in this ecology?

I could clearly see the possibility of taking an elder's incredible power and grace and introducing it into our individualistic, self-centered world and how it would change things, how it would change people, their thoughts, and their relationships. Conversations and decisions would be much better, serving the greater good and having people get along. And I could see the remarkable gift of being an elder for late aging rather than just getting old.

Unlike the rooftop at the Western Culture Building, which was crowded with discontented people, the rooftop of the elder building was not nearly as crowded, where peace, joy, and serenity were plentiful. But for me and all my fellow elders on the roof, the biggest ROI was the higher wisdom attained on those last rungs of the ladder.

BEING AN ELDER

At the time of this writing, I am 78, nearly 79. I have been blessed to live this long in good health. Without many cultural and financial distractions, I can intentionally advance my learning, experience, and expression as an elder.

Higher wisdom has arrived intellectually, spiritually, and experientially. I see more. I understand more. I feel more. I appreciate more. I know less and love more. It seems my health and relationships prosper in this elder ecosystem.

My experience of being an elder is both life-uplifting and, at the same time, heartbreaking. As an elder, the wisdom of the ages has become far more accessible and penetrating. Faith has moved from concept to actuality. But then there is another side to this coin: the suffering in the world is far more deeply felt.

The heartbreak comes from seeing the many unattended fault lines and craters that I can't help but notice as an elder. The hate, heartlessness, greed, righteousness, suffering, and anger cannot be sidestepped.

As an elder, I cannot deny all that is painfully apparent in today’s world. But here is what makes the difference for me: a contemporary elder makes commitments and takes action to heal rather than capitulate.

Commitment shows up in two places: your calendar and your checkbook. One look at my schedule and chart of accounts will validate my commitment to being a contemporary elder in this world to relieve the suffering caused by living in the illusion that this culture precipitates.

The Contemporary Elder Institute is an expression of this commitment. www.requestingwisdom.com It is a structure that presses me to fulfill Gandhi’s challenge, “Be the change you wish to see in the world.”

You can’t change the world until you change yourself. As an elder, I have learned and continue to learn to unchain myself from all I have been to who I can be – and so “Two roads diverged in a wood, and I — I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference.”

FOR CONSIDERATION

If you are ready, and only if you are ready to take the elder path, join us on the March retreat in Zion National Park. www.requestingwisdom.com/retreat

Next Open Sangha call – January 24th, 4:00 pm PT. Guests are welcome. We continue exploring our relationships to obstacles, problems, and difficulties that impact us – and why we respond to them the way we do.

https://form.jotform.com/230334570253044

An Elder's Sage Advice

Wed, 10 Jan 2024 20:12:26 GMT

An Elder's Sage Advice

"Let go of people who aren't ready to love you.

This is the hardest thing you will ever have to do in your life and it will also be the most important thing.

Stop having difficult conversations with people who don’t want to change.

Stop showing up for people who have no interest in your presence.

I know your instinct is to do everything you can to gain the appreciation of those around you, but it's an impulse that steals your time, energy, mental and physical health.

When you start fighting for a life with joy, interest and commitment, not everyone will be ready to follow you to that place.

That doesn't mean you have to change who you are, it means you have to let go of people who aren't ready to be with you.

If you are excluded, insulted, forgotten or ignored by the people you give your time to, you are not doing yourself a favor by continuing to offer them your energy and your life.

Truth is, you're not for everyone and not everyone is for you.

This is what makes it so special when you find people that you have friendship or love matched.

You will know how precious it is because you've experienced what it isn't.

There are billions of people on this planet and a lot of them you will find at your level of interest and commitment.

Maybe if you stop showing up, they won't look for you.

Maybe if you stop trying, the relationship ends.

Maybe if you stop texting, your phone will stay dark for weeks.

That doesn't mean you ruined the relationship, it means the only thing that was holding it was the energy that only you gave to keep it.

That's not love, that's attachment.

It's giving a chance to those who don't deserve it!

You deserve so much more.

The most valuable thing you have in your life is your time and energy as both are limited.

The people and things you give your time and energy to, will define your existence.

When you realize this you start to understand why you’re so anxious when you spend time with people, activities or spaces that don’t suit you and shouldn’t be near you.

You’ll start to realize that the most important thing you can do for yourself and everyone around you, is to protect your energy more fiercely than anything else.

Make your life a safe haven, in which only people "compatible" with you are allowed.
You are not responsible for saving anyone.

It's not your responsibility to convince them to improve.

It's not your job to exist for people and give them your life!

You deserve real friendships, true commitments, and complete love with healthy, prosperous people.

Deciding to distance yourself from harmful people will give you the love, esteem, happiness, and protection you deserve."

Sir Anthony Hopkins

Announcements :
Next Open (Guests and Visitors) Online Sanga Gathering - January 24th.

Retreat Dates – March 21 ^st – March 26 ^th

ChatGPT on Faith

Tue, 02 Jan 2024 20:18:51 GMT

HOLY SH *T!!

Holy Sh*t!!

I asked OpenAI this question: “Write a 700-word article on how to gain faith in a Western, materialistic culture.”

In less than 10 seconds, here was AI’s response.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Title: Nurturing Faith in a Materialistic Culture: A Western Perspective

In the bustling realms of Western society, where the clang of commerce and the allure of material success resonate, the quest for faith can seem daunting. In a culture deeply rooted in empirical evidence and tangible achievements, the intangible realm of faith often takes a backseat. However, cultivating faith in such a materialistic landscape is not only possible but also crucial for personal well-being and societal harmony.

Reevaluate the Definition of Faith

In a materialistic culture, faith is often narrowly associated with religious beliefs. However, faith extends beyond the confines of religious doctrine. It can encompass trust in oneself, others, and the unseen forces shaping our lives. Start by broadening the definition of faith to include trust in the unknown, in the interconnectedness of life, and in the inherent goodness of humanity.

Embrace Mindfulness and Presence

In a fast-paced, achievement-driven culture, it's easy to become disconnected from the present moment. Mindfulness practices like meditation and deep breathing provide a pathway to reconnect with the here and now. By immersing oneself in the present, individuals can find solace and a sense of purpose, fostering the foundation for faith to flourish.

Seek Meaning and Purpose

Materialistic cultures often prioritize accumulation and consumption, leaving individuals feeling unfulfilled and spiritually empty. To counter this, embark on a journey to discover personal meaning and purpose. Engage in activities that align with your values and contribute positively to the world. Connecting with a sense of purpose can anchor faith in something greater than immediate material gains.

Cultivate Gratitude

In a culture that constantly urges us to seek more, gratitude becomes a revolutionary act. Take time each day to reflect on the blessings, big or small, that life has bestowed upon you. Gratitude shifts the focus from scarcity to abundance, fostering a positive mindset and creating space for faith to thrive.

Foster Connection and Community

Materialism often breeds isolation as individuals pursue personal success. Counteract this trend by nurturing meaningful connections with others. Engage in open conversations, share experiences, and build a supportive community. A sense of belonging and shared values can strengthen faith in humanity and the interconnectedness of lives.

Embody Compassion

In a culture celebrating individual achievements, practicing compassion becomes a radical act. Extend kindness and empathy not only to others but also to yourself. Recognize the shared struggles and aspirations that bind humanity together. Compassion serves as a bridge between the material and the spiritual, fostering a deeper understanding of the interconnected nature of existence.

Reflect on Transcendent Experiences

Despite emphasizing the tangible, individuals in a materialistic culture often have experiences that transcend the physical realm. Whether it's the beauty of nature, the joy of artistic expression, or the love shared between individuals, these transcendent moments offer glimpses into something beyond material. Reflecting on and cherishing these experiences can nurture a sense of faith in the unseen and the sublime.

Conclusion

In a Western, materialistic culture, gaining faith requires a deliberate and conscious effort to shift focus from the tangible to the intangible. By broadening the definition of faith, embracing mindfulness, seeking meaning, cultivating gratitude, fostering connections, embodying compassion, and reflecting on transcendent experiences, individuals can navigate the complexities of their cultural landscape while nurturing a profound and enduring sense of faith. In doing so, they can find balance and purpose in a world often dominated by pursuing material success.

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Looking at this result, what are you left with in your perspective of growing old in an AI world that is spinning faster and faster?

The need for elders is becoming urgent. What it means to be human is at stake. Elders have the capacity to bring forth humanity in others.

If you want to understand AI and its future, watch this video interview with Charles Jennings, an Elder and Master in AI. Charles is our technology teacher for the Contemporary Elder Institute.

Elders understand they must expand their relatedness to the most dangerous and disruptive force in human history.

THE LOSS OF BEING HUMAN: WHY WE NEED ELDERS

Tue, 26 Dec 2023 14:28:30 GMT

THE LOSS OF BEING HUMAN: WHY WE NEED ELDERS

Consider your DNA, your genome, to have been God’s creation of the human algorithm. An algorithm that gives you the ability to think and to be conscious. An algorithm that has steadily operated for millennia. The algorithm that makes you human.

This algorithm worked best in the human brain because of the large horsepower of the prefrontal cortex, although the other lobes of the brain got better and faster through their neural networking with the prefrontal lobe.

The algorithm allowed humans to think. Think 60 to 90 thousand thoughts a day. Thinking is a complex cognitive process involving manipulating, interpreting, and organizing information in the mind. It encompasses various mental activities such as problem-solving, decision-making, reasoning, imagining, planning, and remembering.

This algorithm gave humans the capability to be conscious. Consciousness refers to the state of being aware of one's existence, sensations, thoughts, and surroundings.

But beware, the future will more and more be dominated by external machine-generated algorithms, eroding the ability to think for oneself and reducing the ability to be conscious of being human.

These external algorithms are gaining dominance. Even today, our individual thinking and consciousness are losing power. The “boiling frog” metaphor fits perfectly here.

Humanity is those qualities associated with being human, such as compassion, kindness, and benevolence. When you exhibit humanity, it means you are demonstrating humane or compassionate behavior toward others.

In a moral or ethical context, humanity refers to the quality of being humane, ethical, and virtuous. It involves a commitment to values such as justice, fairness, and respect for the dignity of every individual. Where are we today with justice, fairness and respect on a scale today with our humanity and being humane?

Our humanity, thinking and consciousness are slipping away from us and being displaced and replaced.

https://www.facebook.com/watch/?v=715245112146544

From an elder’s perspective, losing our humanity will cost us dearly. Elders hold humanity as quintessential. With the loss of humanity, elders understand we would lose compassion, empathy, ethical behavior, and a sense of moral responsibility. It is evident this loss is already occurring.

From an elder’s perspective, losing our consciousness will also cut us from our metaphysical access, spiritual channels, and sense of the divine. God is being replaced full throttle by scientific materialism.

These external algorithms impact and shift your thoughts and your consciousness. What was once your own thoughts are now manipulated, directed by the intrusion of these algorithms, whether audio, screen, or Metaverse headsets.

Psychological, emotional, and behavioral shifts occur when outside algorithms encroach because they cause cognitive dissonance. Cognitive dissonance is a psychological concept that refers to the discomfort or tension that arises when an individual tries to hold conflicting beliefs, attitudes, or values.

This dissonance wears away how you think until you think consistently with these external algorithms. Who doesn’t want a Tesla, an Apple Watch, or an age-reducing face cream?

Elders are concerned about the consequences if we continue to lose our humanity. The algorithms continuously push our humanity envelope - social media, politics, and cell phones are cranking it out.

Can we stop the overtaking of our human thinking and consciousness? We can’t stop machines marching ahead; they are now self-governing, self-managing, and self-learning. But as elders, we suggest countering their expansion, balancing the scales of accelerating technology, by expanding our humanity, and further developing our consciousness as the counterweight.

Here's what will be lost when you lose your humanity.

Loss of Empathy and Compassion. We evolved, we survived, and we achieved because of social interaction. Loss of empathy and compassion leads to a loss of understanding and concern for others, resulting in conflict and a breakdown of social bonds. Aren’t we experiencing this now?

Loss of Core Ethical Values: We have been able to operate because of a set of ethical principles and moral values. These principles and values are already eroded by the dynamic expansion of machines. Loss of these values and principles will only lead to a society prone to greater corruption, injustice, and moral decay. Fairness and justice go out the window.

Loss of Collaboration: We have thrived due to our ability to cooperate and collaborate. With machines, there is only one answer. We won’t need each other to get ahead. Leadership will be directed by external, not internal, input. This will appear in unhealthy and unproductive business cultures if you're in business. Humanity produces cohesion in business culture.

Loss of Creativity and Innovation. Creativity and innovation were driven by humans being curious, having imagination, and wanting to make it better for others. Exploring new ideas and thinking outside the box, including the AI box, will disappear. With no new ideas, risk-taking, or pursuit of innovative solutions or challenges, that attribute of being human will wither.

Loss of Purpose and Direction. Humans seek meaning and purpose. Without them, it leads to apathy and nihilism, lack of motivation, and wanting to disengage from social and personal responsibility. And you wonder why it is so hard to manage Millennials.

Loss of Spiritual Connection. Humans have always sought a spiritual connection, a deep, meaningful, and transcendent bond that individuals experience with something beyond the material or physical realm. A spiritual connection provides real benefits that contribute to their overall well-being, sense of a higher purpose, and personal growth.

Loss of the greatest gift of being human, to love and be loved.

In our view, elders are the masters and teachers of humanity. They can bring forth the core of what it means to be human in others. Elders can counterbalance the influence of machine algorithmic conversations and remind all of us of the gift and blessing of being human.

You must decide for yourself what legacy you want to leave your children and grandchildren. If you are apathetic, indifferent, or resigned, that you can’t or won’t do something to instill greater humanity into your progenies, what future will they have?

Elders possess and communicate higher wisdom. Higher wisdom has people think for themselves and be more conscious of themselves and the world. Higher wisdom has people get in touch with their deepest humanity. Higher wisdom is the province of elders. To retain our humanity, a clear solution is expanding the influence of elders.

Announcements:

Next Open (Guests and Visitors) Online Sanga Gathering - December 27 ^th .

Next Online Member-Only Sangha Gathering – January 10 ^th

Retreat Dates – March 21 ^st – March 26 ^th

What I've Learned To Transform Growing Old

Mon, 18 Dec 2023 14:09:23 GMT

What I've Lear ned to Transform Growing Old

THE RELATEDNESS OF ELDERS

Relatedness is the degree of connection or association between different things. Consider relatedness as the connection between objects, processes, concepts, and/or human beings. How people and things relate to each other.

Relatedness can be used in various contexts, such as biology (genetic relatedness), linguistics (word relatedness), and cognitive psychology (concept relatedness). Here, the context is elder (experiential and philosophical relatedness).

The relatedness of an elder is recognizably different than most other people. That’s what makes them elders. First, elders recognize that their relatedness determines who they are and how they see the world. They understand that relatedness can be a conscious act, not an unexamined passive act. Change your relatedness; change how you see the world, how the world sees you, and how you see yourself.

Elders understand their relatedness determines their perception of self, others, and the nature of their reality. That allows elders to relate in a distinctive way to their own humanity, which fundamentally changes their relatedness to everything else.

Elders' relatedness to growing old, death, past deeds, failures, emotions, thoughts, and life itself now gives them increased peace, equanimity, joy, and appreciation. Emotionally and psychologically, their relatedness reduces anger, frustration, fear, disappointment, and upset. The relatedness of elders much more “lets it be.”

Elders’ relatedness is different because of an elder’s existential foundation. An elder’s philosophical approach emphasizes their existence as a free and responsible agent determining their own development through acts of consciousness. No blaming others. No faulting others. No condemning others. No denouncing others. The buck always stops with them.

The elders’ existentialism emphasizes their individual existence and to take full ownership of their subjective experience. Which in turn determines their relatedness, their sense of meaning and their identity. Elders are, “The way it is, is the way I see it.”

Relatedness, in this context of elder, shapes an elder’s intrapersonal and interpersonal relationships. Their relatedness establishes their connections with others, which further shapes their understanding of themselves and their purpose.
Elders both intellectually know, but also now intuitively know, that who they are in the world is a function of their relatedness. Who and how they relate to the world is self-determined. No one’s doing it to them.

What is critical for elders in this existential realm is authenticity, being true to oneself. Elders find social, political, and business themes and must navigate expectations and relationships while being true to themselves. That’s an elder challenge. Be appropriate to the situation but without a mask.

Elders are succeeding at this challenge because they have deep self-understanding, so their compass of authenticity-true-north always shows them the way. They are not afraid to be themselves but as an elder also know how to be appropriate to the situation. That’s wisdom.

In my own experience of becoming an elder, relatedness was most impactful in the metaphysical domain. Metaphysical deals with the fundamental questions about reality, existence and being.

Relatedness for me was extremely relevant to the very nature of what it means for me to be human, what it means to grow old, and my interconnectedness to people, circumstances, and the divine.

As an elder, a fundamental interconnectedness or unity underlying all existence became real for me. The intellectual concept of the divine shifted to have experiences of spiritual interconnectedness. This didn’t occur just during a 3-day sitting at a meditation, glorious sunsets in Costa Rica, or deep hikes into the Olympic National Park, but now also occurs while waiting in the slow line at the grocery store.

Relatedness determines perception. Perception determines reality. The famous wave or particle phenomenon proves that. Change your consciousness, change your relatedness. Change your relatedness, change how you see yourself and everything else.

That’s the elder's secret sauce. They alter their consciousness, which alters their relatedness, so who they are for themselves and who they are in the world is altered. Altered in a way where their world has greater peace, ease, grace, appreciation, kindness, and humor with what and with whom they relate, including themselves.

Poetry has the power to distinguish relatedness in dramatic ways.

Irene Sipos
Tired
Sitting across the aisle
on the B train
I look at the row of weary faces
various shapes, sizes, colors, ages,
a horizontal explication of what it means
to have woken many mornings.
to brave routine, to leave concerns at home
along with scattered laundry and unwashed
dishes to head for same/same at work.
I picture each of you, one at a time. I try to
observe without you knowing and suddenly I
see round, soft faces, no creases in foreheads,
no wrinkles like parentheses around eyes, no down-
turned mouths, no slumped shoulders. I see the plump
babies you once were. And with that, a rush of hoping
that you were affectionally held on generous laps, that
you were sung tender songs, that you were offered
a bowl of blueberries as initiation to the messy pleasures
of this world. I hope that occasionally you reach back,
even if only briefly to recall your beginning self as a
visitor new to the planet, unencumbered and dear.
—
Wendell Berry
The Peace
of Wild Things
When despair grows in me
and I wake in the night at the least sound
in fear of what my life and my children’s lives may be,
I go and lie down where the wood drake
rests in his beauty on the water, and the great heron feed
I come into the peace of wild things
who do not tax their lives with forethought
of grief. I come into the presence of still water.
And I feel above me the day-blind stars
waiting for their light. For a time
I rest in the grace of the world, and I am free.

Who are you that death is?

Thu, 30 Nov 2023 19:17:42 GMT

Who are you th at death is?

Death is a cast-iron certainty. You, however, are not. How you relate to death directly impacts how you live your life. Embracing death allows a different relationship with death, a transformative relationship, a make-life more peaceful inside and out. From wherever you are now, till your life ends, you might be missing the gift that death is.

If you were to explore the possibility of death as I propose, look first at your current interpretation of death.

For you, it might mean the very end. The cessation of your existence. Lights out. Game over. Extinction. Darkness.

But that is one untested, unexamined, and unsubstantiated understanding of death. There is another.

Since death is unknowable, my answer is as good as yours.

I hold the other view; I live with and inside this other view, and I appreciate what the other view contributes to my daily life as lived.

____________________________________________________________________

“Do Not Stand at My Grave and Weep”

"Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush
I am the swift, uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there. I did not die."

- by Mary Elizabeth Frye

“Dying well is not the end of parenting, but the fullness of parenting, not the end of a marriage, but the last great act of a married life. Dying well is a bequest that you leave to those you love, probably the only thing that in the end will not be eaten by moths, apportioned by lawyers, or bought for quarters in a yard sale. Dying well is the way you could be known by those you won’t live long enough to meet, the way by which they might feel loved by you after you die.”

― Stephen Jenkinson, Die Wise: A Manifesto for Sanity and Soul

_________________________________________________________________________

“We cannot be truly alive without maintaining an awareness of death. Death is not waiting for us at the end of a long road. Death is always with us, in the marrow of every passing moment. She is the secret teacher hiding in plain sight.”

- Frank Ostaseski (Author of The Five Invitations)

“What we call the beginning is often the end. And to make an end is to make a beginning. The end is where we start from.”

- T.S. Eliot

OpenAI/ChatGPT
The concept of a soul is often tied to religious, philosophical, and cultural beliefs, and interpretations can vary widely. In general terms, a soul is often considered an immaterial, eternal essence or spirit that is distinct from the physical body. Different belief systems provide various perspectives on the nature of the soul, its purpose, and its fate after death.

Different belief systems provide various perspectives on the nature of the soul, its purpose, and its fate after death.
1. Religious Perspectives:
· Christianity: In Christian theology, the soul is often regarded as the immortal and eternal essence of an individual. It is believed to be created by God and is the seat of a person's consciousness and moral responsibility.
· Islam: Islamic beliefs also include the concept of a soul, referred to as "nafs" or "ruh." The soul is considered a divine creation, and its ultimate fate is determined by one's deeds in life.
2. Philosophical Perspectives:
· Plato: Plato, in his philosophical teachings, described the soul as the immortal and unchanging aspect of a person. He divided the soul into three parts: reason, spirit, and desire.
· Aristotle: Aristotle, on the other hand, viewed the soul as the form of the body and emphasized its inseparable connection to the physical body.
3. Cultural and Spiritual Perspectives:
· Hinduism: In Hinduism, the concept of the soul is known as "Atman." It is believed to be eternal and undergoes a cycle of reincarnation, with the ultimate goal of achieving liberation (moksha).
· Buddhism: Buddhism generally rejects the idea of a permanent, unchanging soul. Instead, it emphasizes the concept of anatta (non-self) and teaches that individuals are subject to the cycle of birth, death, and rebirth.

(Marc, After 5 Tequila Shooters)

You and I were born and raised in a Western culture, a culture based on scientific materialism, a culture that only understands the soul in terms of neurological and psychological processes, a culture that avoids rather than evokes the concept of an eternal soul. Much had to change for me. Much had to change in me.

For me, it was the hardest part of the journey of becoming a Contemporary Elder. My first insight was transcendentalism is inherent in every human being. The realization is that I, therefore, have the ability to transcend the self to the divine.

My access relied more on my intuition and allowing myself to have spiritual experiences. For me, it was and is best to access higher truths and insights. Truths that were already there, just submerged. Insights through meditation, contemplation, and self-inquiry rather than any mediated by religious dogma.

If God lives within, that’s where I go to access the divine.

Also, nature holds a central place for my transcendence. The natural world's incredible beauty, order, and harmony are direct evidence of a higher spiritual reality. Generating a deep connection with nature always brings me closer to the divine. That is why we do our retreats at Zion National Park. www.requestingwisdom.com/retreat [Limited spaces left].

Know what you're stepping into

Fri, 03 Nov 2023 12:53:18 GMT

Know what you're stepping into

Know what you're stepping into.

Elders need to be responsible for "what is."

Elders are transformational agents to shift this conversation.

https://www.dailynews.com/2023/10/01/10-questions-that-reveal-how-much-you-know-about-ageism-and-its-costs/

An Elder

Tue, 31 Oct 2023 12:58:42 GMT

An Elder

Becoming an elder is a unique individual achievement. Act III of elder is a solo performance.

You began the path, joining a number of teachers and pilgrims along the way. But there is a point towards the end of the journey when you find yourself alone. The last mile of the path is when you become that unique, singular, unmatched expression of yourself. That self that has always been there but not fully uncovered. But now as an elder, you finally experience two aspects of the polarity at this instant.

Here is a video that allows you to see an elder, and how he became an elder who mastered life's polarity until there was no polarity.

Someone who is distinct, special, idiosyncratic, single, exclusive, one and only, rare, a one-off, and totally unafraid to be seen this way. The essence of an elder.

This 36-minute documentary is about the art and heart of living outside of conventions, in deep integrity with one's essence, featuring Michale Behrens.

Elders live their essence.

THE BALLS OF TAKING A STAND

Mon, 16 Oct 2023 12:19:04 GMT

THE BALLS OF TAKING A STAND

Having balls: The phrase "having balls" is a colloquial expression often used informally to describe someone brave, courageous, or willing to take risks. It's usually used in the context of facing a difficult or challenging situation, even though filled with fear and self-doubt.

Please note that this phrase is considered somewhat crude and can be seen as gender-specific, as it refers to a part of the male anatomy. But to bring contemporary elders into existence, especially in our Western culture, I must acknowledge, it took a lot of balls.

One of my teachers taught me long ago about stand-taking. The lesson he taught - invariably, anytime you take a stand that will alter the status quo, threaten an existing culture, or change a future, the first thing you'll run into are all those who say you're a dumbass fool.

Other comments frequently heard, "What are you doing? You're in your 70s." But there were others – "no investment capital, insufficient resources and personnel, a fragmented market, and the most piercing one, and what you're trying to do is totally anti-culture, given how youth-obsessed we are."

But I had become an elder. I saw what being an elder did for me regarding the quality of life. And I couldn't shake what a contribution, the possibility of elders and its powerful transformational impact on self, relationships, and community.

A stand was taken—a stake solidly driven into the ground. The stand, as expected, was repeatedly challenged. The naysayers initially got louder and louder. But the stand was clear: build a path from older to elder, enabling people to move from older and all that comes with that package to be an elder and the remarkable benefits of following this path.

So here's our proof of concept, our proof of purpose, our vision that has become a legitimate opportunity.

And to those who said it couldn't be done – take a look.

How to Become an Elder with Ron Penvy

Wed, 11 Oct 2023 16:06:15 GMT

How to Become an Elder with Ron Penvy

"The bottom line for me is that we have lost the guiding light of society because we have discounted the value of wisdom and wisdom resides in the experienced elder."

- Dr. David Dinner

Here is a conversation with an experienced elder. Someone who, as we are committed to, brings the presence and speaking of elders powerfully into our world.

A fascinating conversation with the godfather of bringing forth elder powerfully into the world.

Please enjoy the full interview below.

THE NEWSLETTER HIGHER WISDOM FOR MINDFUL AGING

Mon, 02 Oct 2023 23:08:58 GMT

THE NEWSLETTER

HIGHER WISDOM FOR MINDFUL AGING

Our newsletter intends to promote our services and create brand awareness with our email subscribers. The first step to building a newsletter is to outline the specific intentions of the newsletter.

OUR INTENTIONS

These newsletters aim for people to know who we are, what we do, and why we do it.

Who We Are :

· We are the Contemporary Elder Institute / A Social Enterprise

What We Do :

· We provide passage from older to elder, age to sage, resignation to renewal, head to heart, and deactivate the default future of aging to a created future of aging.

· We deliver our work through retreats, twice-a-month group online Zoom calls, and one-on-one and small-group online conversations.

Why We Do It :

· To disable the damaging cultural conversations of late aging.

· For members to source a higher consciousness, a greater self-awareness, a spiritual link, a set of disciplines and practices, to be in a like-hearted cohort that enables the last third of life to be life-giving, not life-taking.

· To have elders' presence, knowledge, and wisdom transform people and their conversations so the common good results.

WWW.REQUESTINGWISDOM.COM

THE ELDER AS JUDO MASTER

Mon, 18 Sep 2023 11:40:34 GMT

THE ELDER AS JUDO MASTER

JUDO, MINDFULNESS AND THE ELDER

The metaphor of Judo helps us understand mindfulness. Mindfulness is elemental and an ongoing practice of a contemporary elder.

A contemporary elder's mindfulness develops from meditation, conscious movement, nature emersions, and koan-like inquiry.

Mindfulness follows the first principle of Judo, non-resistance, using the opponent's energy and movements to your advantage rather than fighting them.

Mindfulness allows elders to witness their thoughts, emotions, and sensations without resistance. Elders know what resists persists. Elders learn to ungrip and release their thoughts, emotions, and body sensations.

Mindfulness changes how elders see and understand their aging. Mindfulness doesn't allow growing old to "throw" them.

Judo practitioners and elders learn to go with the flow of their opponent's movements. They adjust, become fluid, and stay at the edges of the moment—high awareness.

Mindfulness grants this flexibility and adaptability. Mindfulness disallows the clutching and grasping of thoughts or the combustion of emotions. All attention is on the opponent. The opponent will reveal the next move the Judo practitioners should take.

Mindfulness eliminates right or wrong, shoulds or shouldnt’s, and me or you. Mindfulness centers on what is, as it is, without judgment, assessment, or opinion—nothing to impede response time.

Judo emphasizes being centered and grounded to maintain balance and control. Like Judo, mindfulness moves a contemporary elder to be centered and grounded, so needed in the chaos and uncertainty of today's world. Mindful movement does the same. Being in nature, reverently and undisturbed works as well. Solid. Grounded. Bedrock. Centered.

Judo teaches the efficient use of energy and effort to achieve maximum results. Meditation and koan-like inquiry remove the mind clutter, opening the learning and hearing channels and allowing higher wisdom to emerge.

Higher wisdom allows an elder to do 'it,' whatever the 'it' happens to be, with far less effort and energy. An African proverb sums it up: "What an old man can see sitting down, the youth cannot see standing up."

In Judo and an elder's mindfulness, practitioners learn to control their emotions to make clear and rational decisions. Mindfulness enables you to regulate emotions by observing them rather than being possessed by them. This gives Judo practitioners and elders much greater capacity in challenging situations. And yes, aging is a difficult challenge.

Mindfulness requires self-awareness. Self-awareness opens the gate to ongoing and deeper self-understanding and self-development. But this self-awareness also extends outward to greater awareness of people and circumstances.

The metaphor of Judo illuminates the principles of mindfulness, such as non-resistance, adaptability, and centeredness, requiring minimal effort. By abiding by these principles, elders battle and defeat their "opponents" that block peace, grace, humor, love, appreciation, gratitude, and compassion for self and others. Elders have their black belts and consistently "throw" their opponents.

JUDO, THE SOUL AND THE ELDER

In many religious, philosophical, and mythologies, the soul is the human's incorporeal, intangible, and ethereal essence. Depending on the philosophical or religious system, a soul can be mortal or immortal. In our contemporary elder perspective, it is eternal and immortal.

Neither mortal nor immortal can be proven, confirmed, or verified. Which belief system to follow is, therefore, not a rational choice. There is no evidence to validate or invalidate. There is no "proof of concept." Faith is required, which is antithetical to the rational mind.

Given the values, characteristics, and qualities of clients I have worked with, most have reached the top of their professional success by cultivating powerful intellects. They are brilliant. They are resilient. They are innovative. They are doggedly determined. They have powerful egos. All qualities and characteristics are needed for professional and cultural success but are thick barriers to experiencing oneself as a soul.

But like Judo, in our elder work, we use the opponent's force, the forces of the intellect and ego, to break down the door to spirituality and to uncover the soul.

The intellect and the ego become opponents. Elders train to "throw" them.

The Four Elements of a Judo Throw

A Judo throw requires establishing a firm grip (Kumi Kata), getting your opponent off-balance (Kuzushi), getting into position (Tsukuri), and executing the throw (Kake).

It's not enough to embed the techniques into muscle memory; it's also crucial to understand the concepts behind the "throws."

First and foremost, a judo throw requires the establishment of a firm grip. The process of getting this grip - Kumi-Kata.

In becoming a contemporary elder, we get a grip on gripping. We disengage the mind and body's grip of its thoughts, feelings, and associated emotions. We use meditation, mindful movement, and koan-like inquiry. If you can't be griped, you can't be thrown.

The second conceptual element is Kuzushi, or off-balancing one's opponent.
The ego you have crafted is what you use to balance yourself in life. Operating beyond your ego is off-balancing. Engaging in meditation, yoga, and spiritual investigation is adversative to the ego, causing off-balancing.

"Who am I if I'm not my thoughts or feelings?" quickly incites a balance disorder. Contemporary elders' daily practices throw their ego-opponent off balance.
The third element is getting into position for the throw, otherwise known as Tsukuri.

Contemporary elders use Hatha Yoga, Jnana Yoga, meditation, silent meditation hikes in nature, mindful motion, labyrinth walking, journal writing, and group sharing to get themselves in position.

The fourth and final element is the execution of the actual throw, known as Kake.
When in position, the elder is in the moment, ready, keenly aware, and highly sensitive to the beginning of their opponent's first move. They can sense that first flicker of the ego or emotion, and their Judo-like programming instantly begins.
Before, elders would find themselves face down on the mat. Ego and intellect stand triumphantly over their flattened body. Now, with practice, elders can cleanly execute a shoulder throw.

A shoulder throw involves a competitor turning and lifting their opponent on their back while keeping both hands on the opponent's judogi and throwing the opponent over their shoulder.

Elders can throw the many tribulations of aging and living over their shoulder.
In closing, mindfulness is the Judo of the mind.

ANNOUNCEMENTS

Our inaugural Sangha monthly newsletter will be posted in October.

The podcast with Reverend Stephen Garrett on mortality and immortality will be available on our Website in two weeks.

The next Guest Sangha call, where Sangha members can bring interested parties, is on September 27th. Guests can register here .

New York Times Opinion

Mon, 11 Sep 2023 12:11:07 GMT

New York Times Opinion

Dear Mr. Biden, Mr. McConnell, and Ms. Feinstein,

You are now the "old age" problem. But the list is getting pretty long. Right behind you, Markey, Blumenthal, Durbin, King, Cardin Risch, Grassley, and Sanders, all in their mid to late 70s and some in their early 80s. And let’s not forget Pelosi.

It shouldn't be a surprise, given that 54 out of 100 senators are over 65. But what should surprise you is that the nation's median age is 38.9. You must understand that leaders and leadership are most effective and powerful when led by people of their own generation or one just above. Rarely, if ever, below their age. And rarely two to three generations above. That's just the way it is. The reality is you are too old to be a political leader.

And at your age, Mr. Biden, Mr. McConnell, and Ms. Feinstein, you should expect to encounter the Western cultural view about old age. Ageism is real. You and I live in a nontraditional culture. A culture where everything changes. A culture where scientific materialism is treasured. A culture where staying young is a devotional practice.

Age is treated much differently in a traditional culture than in a nontraditional culture. In a traditional culture, growing old is considered a ritual journey—a time of reflection, spiritual enhancement, contribution, and sharing of understanding and experience. Old age in these cultures has a Welcome mat at the door.

In a nontraditional culture like ours, growing old is considered a curse—a time of worthlessness, alienation, estrangement, and uselessness. Whether true or not, old age is seen as a time of rapid decline and loss of power. When seen that way, you are believed to be that way. No Welcome mat here. You are more inclined to find No Trespassing signs.

In a traditional culture, there is a rite of passage from older to elder. This passage does not exist in our nontraditional culture. We go from old to really old. Without cultural recognition and belief in the value of an elder, there can be no acceptable rite of passage open from older to elder.

So, where does this leave you, Mr.Biden, Mr. McConnell, and Ms. Feinstein?

People in old age, like you, are stuck. You are stuck in your previous identities and well-protected positions. Who you have been is all you know how to be—no wonder you hold on so tightly. There is no other future for you but what you have already become.

But now, at your age, you are hitting the malicious forces of ageism - marginalized, isolated, discounted, discarded, and made irrelevant. You are becoming an anachronism. The younger generation sees you as "getting in their way." You are becoming a liability.

You defend against these forces by acting as you always have in the past. But that always-already way of being is rapidly losing its power. What else can you do but cling, grasp, and tightly grip who you have always been?

But if elder were a future for you, you would have a future of opportunity, not manipulation, avoidance, and struggle for control. As an elder, you would be valued. You would be held in high regard. You would be able to contribute your wisdom, altering the very nature of conversations in your respective parties.

Wisdom is the quality of being wise, the power of judging correctly and following the soundest course of action based on knowledge, experience, understanding, etc.; good judgment – sagacity, prudence, and unbiased discernment. You each have these qualities. And you know, down to your bones, that your parties could use a strong dose of wisdom, equanimity, and compassion. Both your parties have lost their way.

An elder's wisdom sees further into the past and deeper into the future, allowing them to understand more clearly the present. An elder can see the consequences of people's decisions and actions and make them understandable to the people making decisions. You have achieved this wisdom but cannot deliver it as a leader.

So, I suggest you consider Mr.Biden, Mr. McConnell, and Ms. Feinstein to become recognized elders for your respective parties. But first, you must realize that as an elder, you must retire from the role of leader.

Elders are wise, benevolent, patient, compassionate, tested, experiential knowledge, and humanity-driven. In contrast, leaders are vision, purpose, goals, and performance-driven. Leaders are the driving force. Elders are the steering force. Elders bring a presence and a higher wisdom that shifts who people are and how they relate to each other.

Look what Desmond Tutu and the Truth and Reconciliation Commission accomplished. That's an elder at work.

Eldership would curtail your party from being further highjacked by uncommon sense, hate, righteousness, blame, fault, and immaturity. It would cool down the flaming egoism. It would generate greater harmony and common sense among colleagues.

In conclusion, Mr. Biden, Mr. McConnell, and Ms. Feinstein, if you saw your next calling as an elder for the good of your party and the country, you would surrender your current leadership position and move into becoming an elder.

As an elder, you would bring forth and select new leadership with the backbone of being principle-centered, core value-driven, and humane. You would guide your respective parties to be all they could be regarding values, principles, and commitments to the country's good, not their own good. You would all realize your legacy.

As an elder, power and control would no longer be required. Wisdom, benevolence, compassion, and truth-telling would be your charge.

Knowledge combined with experience turns into wisdom, which we now have little of in our politics today. Assuming the role of the elder, being seen and heard as an elder, both in your caucus and in public, would be consequential to the nation to see and hear.

So, becoming an elder, Mr. Biden, Mr. McConnell, and Ms. Feinstein, is a credible and reasonable next step to steer yourself, your parties, and the people toward a better future.

Bottom line, if you want to change your party, change the tone, stop the blame and fault game, tap down the emotions, halt the foolishness and egoism, and bring your parties back to focusing on genuinely serving their constituents, not themselves, your next step for you is to become elders.

If you need help transitioning from older to elder, get in touch. We're very good at helping late-age professionals transition from older to elder.

Dr. Marc Cooper

Chairman of Elder Council

The Contemporary Elder Institute

P.S. Forward to your representatives, Federal and State, and any person or entity looking to impact our politics.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You often mention a Sangha. What is a Sangha?

The classic description of a Sangha is simply an assembly or congregation. Our Sangha follows more monastic traditions of Sangha, but we are not religious. In our particular Sangha, we consider God lives within, so that's where we look– and learn how to get the clutter out of the way.

And please note I can only speak from my perspective and experience of being in our Sangha.

For me…

This Sangha generates a context that enables me to have, do, and be a contemporary elder, living with and inside a higher purpose.

The Sangha is a community, actually a tribe, of pilgrims on the same path, where we practice self-awareness and higher consciousness, opening channels to higher wisdom and spirituality.

The Sangha is an existential and metaphysical platform for me to stand on in growing old to deal with the unavoidable physical, emotional, and mental issues of late aging.

The Sangha enables me to be with those usually avoided areas of my life, aging, death, and dying, so I lose the fear and trepidation.

The Sangha allows the past to pass. Regrets disappear. Resentment melts. Forgiveness of others and myself occurs.

The Sangha creates heartfelt relationships among its members, where full acceptance, compassion, love, and humor prevail.

I participate with the Sangha in its retreats and twice monthly online interactions.

I am happier. I have more freedom. I am more fully self-expressed. I am more tolerant. I appreciate life more. I am more patient. I am much more in the moment than in my mind. I smile more. I laugh more. I love more. That's what the Sangha provides for me.

More detailed information about the Sangha go to www.requestingwisdom.com/the-sangha

The Sangha's overarching purpose is to have every Sangha member realize and experience what I am now experiencing for themselves.

Thanks for the question.

ANNOUNCEMENTS…….

Our next members-only call is this Wednesday. You will be sent an email reminder if you are a member.

Our next open call is September 27 ^th . Register to attend here: https://form.jotform.com/230334570253044

Awareness

Mon, 04 Sep 2023 16:40:09 GMT

AWARENESS

Awareness

By John Austen

Awareness-
her gaze is so constant,
our every move
watched
with such affection,
a ceaseless vigil
without condition
or agenda,
silent,
patient,
unrelenting in her
embrace.
There is endless room in
the heart of this lover,
infinite space for whatever
foolishness we may
toss her way.
But she is also.
crafty, this one-
a thief who will steal away
everything we ever cherished,
all our beliefs,
all our ideas,
all our philosophies,
until nothing is left
but her shimmering
wakefulness,
this simple love
for what is.

Complete awareness is when you are entirely engaged with "what is" so that the me, the them, or the it disappears. Only "what is" is.

The constant, relentless mind chatter goes silent. No notice of body sensations. Although all are still there, you don't hear or feel them. Only "what is" is. That's all there is at that instant.

You are totally in the present moment, with little consciousness of yourself as an individual. Your emotional state is colorless. Your body sensations are no longer present. Past and present do not exist. Only the here and now is here now.

You've overtaken by the present moment with a catch-and-release of your thoughts, emotions, sensations, and circumstances—just clouds moving through the sky. You are in an existential place of observation without judgment. Here. Now. Nothing else.

"What is" is all there is.

The discipline is to focus awareness instead of scattering it. As an elder, you put your awareness on the places it counts, not simultaneously but individually. And that is where an awareness discipline is required.

Self: Self-awareness allows us to witness and comprehend our own thoughts, emotions, behaviors, and personality traits. We can have insights into who we are and how we put our "somebody" package together. We see ourselves from the outside looking in.

Environmental: Sunsets. Waterfalls. Tall buildings in Dubai. Cobblestone streets of Dublin. Snorkeling for turtles in Maui. A consciousness of and thorough attention to the external world – surroundings, people, objects, events, and the overall context. Aware of out there, and at those moments, unaware of in here.

Social: Being aware and sensitive to the emotions, needs, perspectives, and behaviors of other people. Total awareness of them takes awareness away from yourself. Empathy essential. Compassion mandatory. Dropping the ego compulsory. An awareness with a high degree of difficulty, at least for me.

Emotional: Emotional awareness is the ability to recognize and be with your emotions and the emotions of others. It requires being with emotion in a way that lessens its energy and interrupts the internal conversations that come with that emotion. You move emotion from the subjective to the objective when you become aware of the emotion.

Spiritual: Spiritual awareness is a heightened consciousness—an understanding beyond reality's material, physical, and mental aspects. There is a deep connection to your inner self, the life around you, and a higher, universal energy. Faith moves from the head to the heart, from intellectual to experiential. Faith has feeling. This awareness is the most challenging for us in the materialistic scientific Western culture.

OUTCOMES OF BEING AWARE

Elders understand that these various planes of awareness are fundamental to their cognition and consciousness. Elders appreciate the more aware of these planes of consciousness, the more able they are to navigate their lives with grace, ease, patience, and prudence.

Elders cultivate and develop these awarenesses through practices like meditation, introspection, and yoga, all best done within a group setting. So, they put themselves in groups where these practices are honored and shared.

What Do We Know

By Mary Oliver

The sky cleared
I was standing
under a tree.

and there were stars in the sky
that were also themselves
at the moment

at which moment
my right hand
was holding my left hand
which was holding the tree
which was filled with stars
and the soft rain —
imagine! Imagine!
the long and wondrous journeys.

Awareness has both existential and metaphysical implications. Awareness has you know yourself more intimately, with more forgiveness and compassion.

Awareness widens the road to more fundamental questions about the nature of reality, existence, and the relationship between mind and world.

Awareness reduces the constant background static of daily life so the spiritual channels are open and heard.

One of the most remarkable gifts you have been given is awareness. And whatever it focuses on expands. Elders focus their awareness on those aspects of their humanity that bring joy, serenity, appreciation, and humor to their lives.

ANNOUNCEMENTS

THE SANGHA EDITORIAL BOARD

An editorial board is a group of editors, writers, poets, and others charged with implementing a publication's approach to editorials, poems, and other opinion pieces. The material published represents the views and goals of the Contemporary Elder Sangha's purpose mission – Older to Elder. Age to Sage. Resignation to Renewal.

Beginning in September, an editorial board member will publish one piece each month. The editorial board also invites other members of the Sangha, Sangha guests, and others to submit their work, but it must meet the conditions and criteria set by the board, which will be published next week.

The next Sangha Members only call is September 13th. You will receive an invitation with the zoom link.

The next Open Sangha call is on September 27 ^th . Registration on the Website www.requestingwisdom.com/the-sangha
There is no cost; we only ask you to be on time.

Conversations of an Elder & Generation Z

Fri, 01 Sep 2023 12:34:47 GMT

Conversations of an Elder & Generation Z

The Contemporary Elder Institute's mission is crystal clear - powerfully bring elders with their qualities, attributes, and wisdom into necessary conversations.

Those conversations which determine the future of relationships, groups, businesses, communities, regions, states, and nations. It would be best if an elder were at the table.

Why? Because the existential presence, the higher wisdom, and the way of being of an elder would bring forth the things most missing in the quality of people's lives.

Why? Because an elder best models, reminds, and renews those qualities of life that most need support, recognition, and appreciation.

Here is a video of a Contemporary Elder's conversation with an Influencer of Generation Z. It will make things very clear.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ai5IeO5n1z0

THE WORDS OF CONTEMPORARY ELDERS

Tue, 29 Aug 2023 12:00:01 GMT

THE WORDS OF CONTEMPORARY ELDERS

"In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God." [John 1:1]

One area I have come to appreciate and continue to explore is language and its stunning impact. Arnold Siegel, Werner Erhard, and Fernando Flores were the first to open my eyes 45 years ago to the power of language.

Since then, I've spoken and learned from linguists, anthropologists, cognitive scientists, neurobiologists, and other scholars to understand the phenomenon of language. They each had their respective hypothesis explaining how humans acquired language and its overriding influences on their development.

Despite persistent research, multiple books published, numerous courses delivered, various seminars offered, some YouTube and TED talks, and a handful of podcasts posted, the origin of why humans have language remains unsettled.

None of their theories, hypotheses, and concepts were mutually exclusive. Most likely, multiple factors contributed to language development over time. But without direct evidence, these theories are only speculative. Besides, their theories are all made up of language itself. The snake eating its tail.

Then again, the spiritual was never considered: 'In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.' No divine consideration was proposed in their hypotheses, theories, or explanations. Nonetheless, the ability to create words might have a divine connection, so it would never fit a materialistic, rational, scientific model.

What is undeniable is that language is the defining characteristic of our species. Every person, family, tribe, community, region, and nation has language.

Language is what makes us human. Language is an integral part of the human experience. It defines how we interact with each other, shapes our thoughts and perceptions, and is the foundation for learning, culture, and society. Human beings, as currently constituted, are the outcome of language.

Language is superior ordinate. Humans are the servants of language. Humans are possessed by language. Humans are domestics in the house of language. Humans are the attendants, minions, and subordinates of language. Language rules. Who we are is the language we think and speak.

Language is the lens through which we see the world. Language determines our perception of ourselves and the people and places around us. Language determines the temporality in which we exist. Language creates our reality. We belong to language.

This awareness brought me to a fundamental inquiry: If language shapes who people are, what is the language of an elder?

The possibility of becoming an elder could, therefore, be accomplished by distinguishing the language of elders and, from here, developing people to understand and speak that language. If we are a function of our language, this path to elder made perfect sense.

Language ultimately creates the context in which we reside. If creating the context of elder is a language phenomenon, developing people to talk and think in the language of elders, they'd become elders. Why? Because context is ultimately decisive.

So, I began this exploration of the elder language by understanding the entomology of the words of an elder, and understanding the words' origin and use gave me a place to stand in my inquiry.

You see, it's not just the word itself. It is how the word is known, what it means to the individual, and what it means in the culture. Words don't last without cultural velcro.

Words must exist in the culture, or they go out of existence. When did you last use Galligskins to describe loose-fitting pants or Snollygoster to describe a corrupt person?

Words have form and exist in time and are, therefore, subject to the universal law of impermanence. Some words or their meanings come and go. Some last longer than others. Some for generations. But over time, many go out of existence.

But when the language of elders is closely examined, what is revealed is none of these transitory characteristics exist in the words of elders. Their words are eternal.

THE ELDER'S WORDS

The meaning of most words is determined by a whole host of factors – historical usage, cultural context, shared understanding, and language conventions. This interplay of these factors and the ongoing evolution as people interact and adapt language to their changing world.

Unlike the transitory nature of most words, my first clue was the words of the elder language remained unchanged. The words of an elder were enduring. These words have been spoken for millennia. Words that have always meant the same over time. Words that were heard in the same in every generation. Words that provide a consequential meaning for the listener.

So there was something in the words, the language of elders, that's eternal and universal, given their words can be heard and understood profoundly. Somehow, the listener(s) could hear the elder's words because they already existed within the listener. If you don't have it, you can't hear it.

These enduring words of an elder are the words of Higher Wisdom.

Wisdom and Higher Wisdom refer to different knowledge, insights, and understanding qualities. The difference between the two depends on context, philosophies, and personal beliefs.

Wisdom is applying knowledge and experience to make solid judgments, exercise discernment, and act in beneficial and ethical ways. Wisdom includes practical life experience, common sense, and the capacity to navigate complex situations with a balanced, thoughtful approach.

Wisdom is a quality that comes with learning, reflecting, and understanding the consequences of your actions. Wisdom is a higher consciousness, a greater awareness, and a more profound sensitivity to the world and its people.

It is a Wisdom that allows you to live and work with enhanced abilities, power, and effectiveness. With this Wisdom, you can see further into the past, deeper into the future, and more accurately predict what will happen next.

And you can't get to Higher Wisdom without this kind of Wisdom. Stage one is to become wise in your day-to-day reality.

Higher Wisdom is a more spiritual form of knowledge and insight that transcends ordinary understanding. Higher Wisdom is tied to existential and metaphysical beliefs. Beliefs that lead to a deeper understanding and appreciation of the nature of reality, existence, and the universe.

Higher Wisdom involves insights into immortal truths, the nature of consciousness, and the interconnectedness of all things. It goes beyond the confines of everyday life. Higher Wisdom brings an awareness that goes beyond the ego and personal desires. The path to elder is the journey of Higher Wisdom.

While Wisdom generally refers to practical knowledge and good judgment from experience, Higher Wisdom refers to a deeper and more spiritually informed understanding that transcends the ordinary and touches the profound truths about existence.

Higher Wisdom changes who you are. Higher Wisdom opens the channels to your unexpressed humanity. Higher Wisdom lets you remember what it means to be a human being and appreciate the gift that life is.

CONCLUSION

1. You belong to language.

2. Higher Wisdom lives within all of us and can be uncovered.

3. Higher Wisdom brings forth the nobility of peoples' humanity.

4. Elder development can best be accomplished through learning the language of elders.

5. The language of elders is Higher Wisdom.

6. Contemporary elders can bring Higher Wisdom to our world. It is what the world needs now.

Hmm. Maybe I should create "Babbel" for learning the elder language?

ANNOUNCEMENT:

As we age, our bodies decay. That is the irrevocable law of impermanence. We get old, we deteriorate. The telomeres of our DNA shrink, our cells don't mitose effectively, and our mental and physical capacities become slowed. How do we relate to this aging phenomenon so we are not at its mercy?

The next Open Sangha call is on September 27 ^th . Registration on the Website www.requestingwisdom.com/the-sangha

There is no cost; we only ask you to be on time.

Jewish Wisdom

Mon, 21 Aug 2023 11:36:59 GMT

"A fool says what he knows, and a wise man knows what he says."

I am on the next round of edits of my book, The Elder Essays: The Thinking and Being of a Contemporary Elder. I thought this one essay might make you smile.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I have gleaned this material from the Old Testament, the Torah, the Kabbala, the Talmud, my Ancestors, Rabbi Zalman Schacter, Ram Dass, and my father, Sidney Cooper, and my friend, Alan Cahn.

Jews originated as an ethnic and religious group in the Middle East during the second millennium BCE.

Jews make up only .002 (2 per thousand), or about 1 in every 480 people worldwide are Jews.

Simple principles have been expressed in their liturgy – written, oral, and rituals throughout their existence. Principles with very practical meanings. These principles are lived daily by pious Jews. And, of course, many of these principles show up in their wit – given that humor is so fundamental to the Jewish culture.

The strength of these principles might explain why Jews have prospered in every land they have been allowed to settle, even though they repeatedly face forced exile, annihilation, and brutal antisemitism.

What are these principles that have guided Jews for millennia?

· What you don't see with your eyes, don't invent with your mouth.

· Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.

· If they gossip about everyone to you, then they are gossiping about you to everyone.

· Gossip uses someone else's weakness as entertainment.

· Never engage in rumors and gossip because they're just as fake as those who started them.

· There's a difference between knowing somebody and hearing about somebody. Just because you "heard" doesn't mean you "know."

· The best revenge is to have enough wisdom not to seek it.

· Weak people revenge. Strong people forgive. Wise people ignore.

· Rejoice not at your enemy's fall – but don't rush to pick them up either.

· While seeking revenge, dig two graves – one for yourself.

· Living well is the best revenge.

· Forgiveness hides a pleasure that you can't get back from revenge. Do not delight in an enemy's demise.

· Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them more.

· Destroy your enemies by making them your friends.

· Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.

· A friend you have to buy, enemies you get for nothing.

· Forgive others not because they deserve forgiveness but because you deserve peace.

· We judge people where we are ourselves the most ashamed.

· Shame is that feeling that comes over you, making you feel small, weak, and unworthy.

· Shaming another person does not define who they are; it defines who you are.

· What your daughter does, the mother did.

· To get joy, we must give it, and to keep joy, we must scatter it.

· A joyful spirit is evidence of a grateful heart.

· You don't have the power to make life fair, but you do have the power to make life joyful.

· Find a place inside where there's joy, and the joy will burn out the pain.

· He who finds a faithful friend finds a treasure.

· Helping people help themselves is the highest form of charity.

· You can do nothing to help someone who doesn't want to help themselves.

· There is no better feeling for the heart than reaching down and lifting people up.

· Don't depend too much on anyone because even your own shadow leaves when you are in the dark.

· Learn to carry yourself on your own back. People will drop you quicker than they picked you up.

· Just because someone desires you doesn't mean they value you.

· Don't lean on others; you don't need to. You were born with two feet for a reason.

· The walls that confine you are the ones you build yourself.

· The highest form of wisdom is kindness.

· You begin saving the world by saving one person at a time; all else is idealism or politics.

· One person can stop a great injustice. One person can be a voice for the truth.

· One person's kindness can save a life.

· A doctor saves lives; it's up to people to create lives worth saving.

· When the last tree has been cut down, the last fish caught, and the last river poisoned, only then will we realize we can't eat money.

· Good and bad fortune are often indistinguishable.

· If life has dealt you some bad cards, then let wisdom make you a good card player.

· Just when it seems like it is getting good, something has to come along and ruin it.

· You never know what worse luck your bad luck saved you from.

· Remember that sometimes not getting what you want is a blessing.

I'll end this post with two quotes that run deep in the DNA of the Jewish people.

Albert Einstein: "The pursuit of knowledge for its own sake, an almost fanatical love of justice, and the desire for personal independence – these are the features of the Jewish tradition which make me thank my stars that I belong to it."

Rabbi Zalman Schacter-Shalomi: "A mensch is someone to admire and emulate, someone of noble character. The key to being a real mensch is nothing less than character, rectitude, dignity, a sense of what is right, and being responsible."

Why Do We Meditate?

Fri, 18 Aug 2023 19:52:55 GMT

Why Do We Meditate?

When in the formulation and through the existence phases of an organization, you continually ask and answer these four fundamental questions.

Who are we?
What do we do?
How do we do it?
What's our offer?

Who are we? We are late-aged professionals, who have departed their careers, exploring the best way to live the last third of our lives. Our intention is to become contemporary elders.
What do we do? We have online meetings, retreats, readings, individual interactions, and videos to unlock ourselves from our past and what the culture tells us about how we should age. We work on altering our relationship to aging, death, and dying,
How do we do it? We use Mediation, Hatha Yoga, Jnana Yoga, Mindful Movement, Socratic and Appreciative Inquiry, to shift from older to elder, age to sage, and resignation to renewal.
What's the offer? We offer membership into a unique group, the Sangha, that supports you in transforming your late life into something that is created rather than following the dictates of the culture.

Given that most choices are not only based on information but in large part on experience, here is a video of one of the Elder Council members. Judy is our Hatha Yoga and Meditation teacher. Being with her, you'll get a direct experience of the Sangha and the kind of people who are members. For further exploration, visit our Contemporary Elder Institute at www.requestingwisdom.com

You can access Judy's podcast episode on Why We Meditate HERE . Or watch the video below.

ELDERS ARE SO WEIRD

Wed, 16 Aug 2023 18:58:37 GMT

ELDERS ARE SO WEIRD

The unspoken consensus is elders are weird. What is it about elders that have them considered weird?

Until this perception of being weird is understood and eventually transformed, it will remain a barrier to an elder's ability and credibility to bring forth higher wisdom. And the world could certainly use some higher wisdom.

The word weird was initially spelled "wyrd" and alluded to having a foot in both worlds, reality and spirituality, which allowed elders to have a unique capacity to hold these polarities together.

Over time, the meaning of weird shifted to encompass more general notions of destiny, fate, and magical and supernatural influences. However, weird took a left turn in Western culture. When spoken, weird portrays something or someone as strange, creepy, or unusual – in other words, weird.

People or things considered weird will not be invited to engage in conversations where relationship, family, group, or executive decisions occur - decisions that shape their future. And that's where elders must be to make the most significant difference.

THE DILEMMA

Elders can access other planes of reality beyond what the thinking mind can comprehend. Nearly all spiritual, philosophical, and metaphysical traditions contend the existence of these other planes of reality. And people in both the East and now many in the West have direct experiential knowledge of these other planes of reality.

These planes are different levels or dimensions of existence beyond the physical world that the thinking mind can perceive. Elders reach these other planes through meditation, yoga, self-reflection, contemplation, and some with psychedelics. And these planes of reality are as real as the reality you wake up into every day.

When the thinking mind encounters an elder who occupies these other planes of reality, planes the thinking mind cannot recognize, it leads directly to the interpretation that elders are weird.

Although incredibly powerful and essential for cognition, the thinking mind has some unexamined limitations and restrictions that keep hidden what's behind and beyond their thoughts.

Know the thinking mind for what it is, neither patron nor benefactor. The thinking mind is its own private institution. Becoming an elder whose abilities go beyond the thinking mind would be seen as weird.

THE THINKING MIND

The thinking mind is programmed to think "about" things. Thus, it has to turn everything into an object, including oneself. The mind automatically creates a duality when it thinks – him, her, them, or it over there, and me over here.

The thinking mind can't help itself. It can only do what it is designed to do: think "about" things. Since it can only think "about" things, the thinking mind has difficulty relating to awareness, faith, and the existence of the soul since none are things.

No wonder the thinking mind finds elders strange; since faith and the divine exists for elders, not as a caricature or concept. Given its design and function, is it any wonder the thinking mind would make God into a thing?

The thinking mind always comes with its locked-in prejudices and biases. The thinking mind believes it already knows. The thinking mind's job is to make itself right. And when it's wrong, it's right about being wrong. It's a closed-loop system.

The thinking mind is the judge and, most often, the jury, passing sentences on others and oneself. But elders learn to be the neutral party in the courtroom, not the judge, jury, prosecutor, or defendant. That is another reason the thinking mind finds elders a bit weird. Elders don't get involved in courtroom drama.

Although the mind thinks it has unlimited processing capacity, the thinking mind has a finite processing capacity. Koans in Zen Buddhism, a riddle that the thinking mind cannot solve, are used to interrupt the thinking mind and to see what's behind it.

In our work, we use two kinds of yoga, Hatha Yoga and Jnana yoga, to alter how people relate to their thinking minds. In both of these yogas, you can witness the mind in action. You get off the field and into the stands. You watch the thinking mind's offense and defense on the field. And after a while, you can call the plays before they happen. That is enlightenment.

The thinking mind pays little attention to the impact of emotions on what it thinks. But try thinking clearly when angry, afraid, upset, or heartbroken. Elders understand emotions are always there, exerting their influence – if they go unrecognized, they persist.

Elders let their emotions be present without being possessed by them or trying to suppress them. They have emotions; emotions do not have them. And elders get very nuanced about their emotions to gain greater awareness of them when they occur. They become the subject of their study on emotions. "Ah, here's that jealousy one again."

Elders do not need to process their emotions because they recognize their impermanent nature. Like waves on the ocean, they arise, crest, break, and make their sounds but soon disappear back into the ocean.

The ability to let emotions be, makes elders seem weird when they don't get upset, angry, defiant, or resistant. Not that elders lack emotion, they just don't become their emotions. Elders don't get sucked in.

Having survived their many troubles and tribulations, elders are not shocked or overwhelmed by today's crises and conflicts. Having repeatedly seen how things fall apart, elders have also witnessed the uncanny ways in which nature and humanity find roots of renewal.

An elder enhances renewal. The thinking mind has trouble understanding selfless intention: Selflessness and the mind, oil and water.

The thinking mind grasps and clings to keep its importance. As the Buddha stated in his noble truths, 1) Life is suffering. And 2) the cause of suffering is clinging and grasping to your thoughts.

Thoughts about the future. Thoughts about the past. Thoughts of fantasies. Thoughts of opportunities lost. Thoughts about mistakes made. An unending spool of thoughts. Nearly all of those 60,000 thoughts you have daily live in the past or the future.

An elder focuses on being in the present moment, which requires much more catch-and-release of thoughts. Minimize grasping and clinging, create greater freedom, and allow accessibility to higher wisdom. Thoughts become visitors, not permanent residents.

THE CONTEMPORARY ELDER CALLS FOR THE NEXT WEEKS

https://www.requesti ngwisdom.com/the-sangha

Upcoming Sangha Meetings:

If you would like to invite your friends to attend a guest call please have them register here: https://form.jotform.com/230334570253044

August 23rd - Open to guests
September 13th - Sangha Members only
September 27th - Open to guests
October 11th - Sangha members only
October 25th - Open to guests
November 8th - Sangha members only
November 22nd - open to guests
December 13th - Sangha Members only
December 27th - Open to guests

THE POWER OF THE ELDERS

Mon, 07 Aug 2023 21:09:42 GMT

THE POWER OF THE ELDERS

Part of our mission at The Contemporary Elder Institute (CEI) is to effectively increase the power of elders to cause sustained positive change in the world.

To enable elders to acquire the power needed to be seen and heard as significant value-added is fundamental to the mission. For elders to have the power to be seen as an asset, not seen as a liability, requires a particular way of being in the world. To have the power to deliver higher wisdom so that interactions turn out differently demands a unique way of existence.

Power is more than a concept. Power is a phenomenon. Power occurs in people's awareness and experience. Power can influence, control, or affect behavior, action, and decision-making. Power allows an individual to shape outcomes, influence opinions, and make a difference in the lives of others. Power can and does have far-reaching consequences.

Power can change the course of events. Elders with great power could change the course of many conversations at every level. Move the conversation from right-wrong, good-bad, mine-yours, selfishness-selflessness. With an elder's input, the outcomes of most conversations would be vastly different.

The most difficult challenge is the culture has wholly collapsed elder with older. Given the attitudes and beliefs about older, elders have difficulty gaining invitations to participate in meaningful conversations.

But elders also know the only person you can change is yourself, so what needs to occur is an elder must be able to gain the power to impact how people think, behave, and relate to them. Elders need to become fully responsible for how they are seen and heard. Responsibility is their starting point to gain power. Who does an elder need to be to be heard as a sage?

"Who do I need to be as an elder to influence the listening so I am heard at the deepest levels of humanity? Because how I am heard determines the effectiveness of my speaking. If they can't hear me, nothing will change."

The models to understand the phenomenon of positive power is only available in singular form; Gandhi, Mandela, TuTu, Roosevelt, Goodall, Nightengale, Einstein, Curie, Erhard, and Ram Dass. They each had the power to make global change happen. When they spoke, people listened. When people listened, it changed their lives and the world.

So looking a t the shared existential qualities of these individuals, all considered elders, was undoubtedly an excellent place to understand the source of power.

When examined, all these influential individuals possessed certain qualities, although they expressed them differently. These qualities were the infrastructure of their being.

These are also the very qualities that make an elder an elder. These qualities make elders worthy of being heard, appreciated, and respected. These qualities live embedded in their words, implicit in their speaking, allowing them to be heard as a sage.

If you see the following qualities expanding in your life, be careful, you may be on the path to becoming an elder.

Empathy and compassion are present for others. These feelings stir more deeply. These feelings have you thoughtfully consider how to make a difference for others. You understand their needs, concerns, and feelings because you are now conscious and aware of your own.

Vision and purpose are emerging as your pistons of power. You are all grown-up about the reality you are dealing with in the world, and, at the same time, you are on the tip of commitment, ready to heed a call of duty. The paradox between reality and possibility has much less tension than ever before.

Diversity and inclusion are opening wider. You find yourself more accessible to hearing different voices, listening more with curiosity than judgment. You hear new perspectives and insights. No need to prove yourself smart; you know it doesn't matter anymore.

Transparency and accountability. You are now making decisions after thoughtful consideration. You know, impulse gets you in trouble. Thoughtful consideration includes conversations with a few trusted people because you're no longer invested in being right. Not hiding makes you invincible.
Accountability is giving your word and being your word in action. Your word is your vow.

Collaboration and cooperation. You're noticing that people around you are more empowered. Collaborative power is the ability to create power in others. Power doesn't follow the rule of thermodynamics. It does not occur in a closed system and is not constant. It is getting people to mutually commit to a future so a collective voice is spoken. It is this voice that invokes real change.

Being Human and humanity gives you access to the ultimate power plant. You find yourself more accepting of your humanity – flaws, weaknesses, stupidities. You have far fewer qualms about being who you are. You have given up needing to be somebody else. You now have legitimate concerns about humanity's future and want to make an impact.

Adaptability and flexibility are more available. You can unstick yourself more rapidly. You're more masterful at applying power in the right places at the right time in the right way. You're not stuck in doing it "the" way, "your" way, or the" right" way – all past based. You know the solution always lives in the future.

Tenured thinking and patience are part of using power more wisely, not releasing it too soon, streaming it when appropriate, and being highly aware of its long-term effects. You understand things take time, and the best work is done at the right time, not your time.

Ethical and moral decision-making are showing up more and more in your everyday considerations. You recognize these moral and ethical signals moving you to a higher plane. And you recognize that ethics and morality are now loud voices overriding the previous thoughts of what's in it for me.

These qualities are an ensemble that enables a way of being that empowers your highest expression of being human. And when expressed in the deeds and the doer, it causes a state of attentiveness and affection from others so that your words profoundly resonate, stir the soul, and open the gate to the fullness of humanity, yours and theirs.

Your interactions bring forth higher wisdom, compassion, and equanimity, just what's missing in today's world.

ANNOUNCEMENTS

I AM

Fri, 04 Aug 2023 11:42:24 GMT

I AM

A fierce teacher on your path to elder is, "I am." Engaging in "I am" is a self-piercing contemplation, ruthless reflection, and brutally honest recognition of oneself. The hardest person to see, know, and forgive is yourself.

"I am" is a true, no sh*t, existential challenge. It fits the "no pain, no gain" paradigm perfectly.

If you have a noun at the end of your "I am," that has limited power. I am a parent. I am a professional. I am a sibling. I am a citizen. I am a spouse. I am a writer. I am whatever. You have defined yourself. "I am" is this known personage—your way of being seen. "Who I am is how I am known. And that is also how I know myself."

The elders' work is on the other side of the Equation of "I am." The "I" in the "I am" becomes more crucial in late aging. The ROI is more significant on this other side of the Equation.

Giving up trying to expand or wanting to be more known and successful in your previous nouns, nouns you placed at the end of your "I am," these nouns are untenable, unsustainable, and impermanent.

Now you hang out with people that allow you to be yourself – no nouns needed here. Whatever is present in these encounters isn't you being anyone of those nouns. Nouns have edges and limitations. Being unencumbered and free is not on the noun side of the "I am" Equation.

What if you take away all those nouns? What's left? Actually, who is left? Do you have any idea, because that's the only permanent thing? And that's not a noun.

Nouns don't give you access to what's inside. Ending your "I am" with words that people agree on - their context and meaning, as does the culture, neighbors, and family – leaves you on the outside.

Nouns come with their characteristics and qualities. Nouns are outside words. You have lived in compliance with these outside words. You've lived up to the expectations that come with these words.

As you age, outside words count less until they don't count anymore. Who you are beneath all these nouns is now the mystery to be solved in late aging. Pursuing who is the "I" of "I am" leads to a greater quality of life as lived.

Nouns can't give you access to who you really are.

I AM

I am not that shadow in the night.

Not the one that rises in the morning light.

I am neither one color nor another.

Beyond the chromosomes of father and mother.

I am not the lyrics of another's song,

but stanzas to my own belong.

The me not bound by chains of doubt or fear,

I have already jumped without knowing I'd persevere.

Not held to other voices, the self's voice I could finally hear,

A small voice, a pure voice, a voice that was crystal clear.

At that moment, I knew who I was.

Insight. Revelation. I was cause.

Marc Cooper

Only 10 Days to the Special Guest Event

Mon, 31 Jul 2023 22:39:04 GMT

Only 10 Days to the Special Guest Event

The power of forgiveness is profound and can have transformative effects on individuals and relationships.

Forgiveness is the act of letting go of resentment, anger, or the desire for revenge toward someone who has wronged you.

Forgiveness involves releasing negative emotions and choosing to move forward with compassion and understanding.

Who can you not forgive?

What can you not forgive about yourself?

The Contemporary Elder Institute (CEI) Presents A SPECIAL GUEST EVENT Forgiving the Unforgivable.

Thu, 27 Jul 2023 22:00:47 GMT

The Contemporary Elder Institute (CEI) Presents

A SPECIAL GUEST EVENT

Forgiving the Unforgivable.

Each month, the members of CEI work on particular domains of our humanity that become increasingly damaging as we age. This month, we worked on forgiveness. The last of our three sessions was forgiving ourselves, which we found the most difficult.

At the end of these monthly sessions, we invite a prominent expert, authority, or master teacher to speak about the subject we have been focusing on. Given the tremendous value of being with individuals of this stature, we open these special guest events to the public.

Our honored guest speaker is Dr. Buck Blodgett. Founder and Executive Director of the “Love>hate Project.” Who Buck is and what the project is about are well presented in this video.

Now Available - The Elder’s Edge Podcast

Tue, 25 Jul 2023 20:54:10 GMT

Now Available - The Elder’s Edge Podcast

The Contemporary Elder Institute is pleased to announce that the first episode of The Elder’s Edge podcast is now available featuring Ed Sancious. Ed is a member of the Elder Council, a Zen Buddhist, Artist & Poet Seeing.

The Elder’s Edge podcast is for those now at the edge of late aging who intend to be highly conscious and decidedly self-determined as they encounter getting old and the end of their lives. Your past wins, losses, and former personae, who you have always considered yourself to be, are no longer valid when you push off from this edge. Now what? These podcasts make the edge your center. For those ready to jump.

To access the podcast you can listen HERE ON SPOTIFY or SIGN UP HERE to get access on Apple and Google podcasts.

Interested in learning more about The Contemporary Elder Sangha? Visit our Sangha page at https://www.requestingwisdom.com/the-sangha

I f you have any issues accessing the podcast, please reach out to Melissa ( melissa.greer922@gmail.com ) for support.

An Elder's Success

Mon, 24 Jul 2023 12:20:13 GMT

An Elder's S uccess

A contemporary elder's context and success concepts differ from the Western culture's context and concepts.

Western culture's success focuses almost entirely on knowledge and technology. Traditional elder cultures focus on higher wisdom and spirituality—two separate tracks with very different destinations.

The values that drive success differ between these two. Success in Western culture is driven by individual achievement and personal gain. The values of elders are driven by contributions to the community and preserving and enhancing what it means to be human.

Values are superior-ordinate, shaping your being and behavior. They are deeply rooted core beliefs, principles, and ideals that oversee your actions, decisions, and attitudes.

You are an expression of your values in thinking and action. An elder's values have evolved from standard cultural, societal, and familial values owed to their life experiences and self-awareness.

Western cultural success focuses on short-term goals and immediate results. Success is commonly associated with achieving certain numbers or certain things within specific timeframes.

A businessman's or businesswoman's success is judged by meeting the one, three, and five-year strategic plans, crushing the KPIs, and consistently delivering measurable and time-anchored tangible results.

Personal success in the Western context is determined by everything you have physically acquired, your trips and travels, possessing the latest technology, and who you hang out with.

Success in this Western cultural context is constructed on ideals. Ultimately, an elder realizes an ideal is a failed future. Ideals aren't real. They are the ego's tool that causes the greatest suffering. Ideals always have you be "never good enough."

In the West, personal and professional goals are decided by comparing and contrasting yourself to others, whether in person, to images on magazine pages, or on a screen.

Compare and contrast your level of compensation, the type of car you drive, the house you live in, the art on the walls, and the social activities you attend are the trophies of this kind of success.

At some point in your aging, it becomes apparent that these success goals are transient. The finish line keeps on moving. The realization occurs that these goals have little impact on the quality of your life. And all these goals, these symbols of success, continually cry for more attention and energy – which you longer want to give.

It becomes apparent that all these goals have a limited shelf-life, And once the goals are taken off the shelf, another has always taken its place, usually bigger and better than the last. But now you realize these goals are ephemeral—no need to keep the fantasy going.

You have realized this culturally defined success reduces you to a performing object. It becomes apparent it does nothing to enhance the quality of your life, expand your consciousness, deepen your self-understanding, or open your spiritual channels. More, better, and different of the same thing doesn't give you entre to your most profound humanity.

As an elder, you understand that what matters isn't tangible, isn't based on unattainable ideals, and isn't realized by comparing and contrasting. These hold you back from discovering your true self and unique expression.

Furthermore, Western cultural success desires the immediate. Elders have a different time horizon. Elders have a long-term perspective emphasizing patience, long-term planning, and generational continuity.

For elders, success is measured by their impact on the entire community and future generational outcomes—the legacy judges success leave behind.

Accumulations of possessions, career advancement, and social and professional status were the steps of their success ladder. But now, close to the top, they realize the ladder is against the wrong building.

Elders move the ladder to another building and start climbing. Elders value spiritual wealth and hold wisdom, moral character, integrity, and gracefully navigating challenges are the highest achievement markers. Success is measured by cultivating inner qualities rather than external triumphs.

But operating from an elder's perspective of success is unwelcome in our culture. More is better; get it while you can and be held as successful in the eyes of others are potent undercurrents. But elders see the red flags about swimming at your own risk.

Given the chasm between these two cultural designations of success, it is easy to see why the elders' wisdom finds access difficult. Yet, it is also evident that operating from the current cultural distinctions of success is not life-giving but life-taking.

Contemporary elders in our Western nontraditional culture must be responsible for causing an opening for their wisdom to be heard. The question at the Contemporary Elder Institute with which we are constantly engaged is, who does an elder need to be in today's world for their wisdom to be heard?

Contemporary elders know that bringing wisdom more fully into the world, would change the world.

WISDOM IN BEING & ACTION

Tue, 18 Jul 2023 11:38:35 GMT

WISDOM IN BEING & ACTION

Two of my most revered wisdom teachers – Rabbi Zalman Schacter and Ram Dass

WISDOM IN BEING & ACTION

THE ELDER’S MISSION IMPOSSIBLE

An elder ultimately realizes that knowledge is self-limiting. Although knowledge is valuable for achieving success in our Western cultural context, ultimately, it limits the self from becoming its full self.

I'm speaking about the unappreciated portion of, the segment of the self that refers to your sense of personal identity, consciousness, and individuality. Your core essence. Your thoughts, emotions, and beliefs. How you encounter the world. How you perceive your own existence.

Knowledge is focused on acquiring, creating, and disseminating knowledge.

Knowledge in our cultural values is the holy grail.

Knowledge, when examined, is the accumulation and sculpting of harvested information. Knowledge attempts to retain information in all forms - data, facts, statistics, numbers, percentages, interpretations, images, conversations, theories, formulas, and existing models.

Some knowledge may allow you to understand the self better but doesn’t have enough existential power to change the self. As one of my teachers once said, “Understanding is the booby prize.”

Basically, information consists of particles of data that have been organized, processed, and then given meaning. It is a process of transforming raw data into a structured and meaningful form so you can understand the world. But knowledge doesn’t allow you to get to the deeper self.

Knowledge exists in both time and form. Anything that exists in time and form is impermanent. Remember the vast knowledge you had for your major in college? Where did that knowledge go?

Knowledge is primarily a function of intellect. Intellect is only a fragment of the self. If you can’t access the other parts while only residing in the intellect, then a precious part of the self remains dormant.

To access the larger self, examine where you impose limitations or restrictions on yourself. Those boundaries and barriers, set consciously or unconsciously, remain unexamined.

Reflect on boundaries associated with fear, self-doubt, grief, lack of confidence, past painful experiences, or negative beliefs about yourself. Knowledge won’t help you here. Knowledge won’t change the script; the actor needs to change.

In our culture, this unquenchable thirst for knowledge comes with the belief that knowledge will improve the quality of life is flawed. The cumulation of knowledge usually leads to a fixed mindset, immovable beliefs, and secure perspectives that create a ridge mindset and resistance to change and deflects any new or alternative possibilities. Knowledge puts up walls.

Over the last forty years of consulting work, I have engaged with many erudite people who have accumulated vast stores of knowledge. Yet, their expanding volumes of knowledge did not impact the quality of their lives.

Knowledge impacts what you do, not who you are.

Knowledge, as the only source of self, comes with very limiting factors. Confirmation bias is the most frequently encountered. Confirmation bias is where accumulated knowledge reinforces existing beliefs and biases.

Confirmation bias leads individuals to seek information that confirms their perceived notions while ignoring any information that challenges their perspectives.

With confirmation bias, you get to be right that you are right. That’s called righteous. A steel door to what’s on the other side of knowledge. The self is confined to only knowing what it already knows. And what is doesn’t know already is only an extension of what they already know.

Knowledge runs in a narrow corridor.

The other element I encounter with smart people is intellectual arrogance. A subtle yet distinct sense of superiority. A curtain that separates the self from other people, kills collaboration, trashes empathy and mutual understanding, and hears coaching as accusatory.

Knowledge bends smart to smug.

There is a point in aging when you realize that expanding your knowledge further, standing on your platform of those hundreds of books, podcasts, YouTube videos, seminars, meetings, files, and online courses, those thousands of conversations, has not given you a deeper self-understanding.

Knowledge doesn’t reveal the self to the self.

Knowledge doesn’t make you happier. It doesn’t give you greater peace, ease, and grace. It doesn’t have any existential or metaphysical capacities. When more knowledge doesn’t improve the quality of your life, this is when you finally realize what is missing is wisdom.

This is the moment that you consciously transition from older to elder. For now, you come to seek wisdom, not more knowledge. And wisdom lives within, not without. Wisdom is an indoor event.

WISDOM & THE SELF

Wisdom is self-awareness, self-understanding, and self-consciousness. Knowledge is external knowledge, and functional understanding, which has little to do with who you are being in life.

Wisdom goes beyond intelligence or the accumulation of information by encompassing insight, discernment, and awareness to allow you to see the actual implications of your thinking and actions.

Wisdom provides clarity, perspective, empathy, and humility. Knowledge does none of these. In fact, knowledge does the opposite.

Wisdom integrates your knowledge and values and empowers intuition to navigate complex situations and dilemmas effectively. Your core values become your rudder, and you become keenly aware of their pulsation.

Knowledge doesn’t operate from core values.

Wisdom heightens self-awareness through contemplation, reflection, and self-discovery. Knowledge doesn’t require these practices. They are not needed to accumulate more information.

Wisdom is not limited to any specific field but can be applied across most aspects of life – personal relationships, ethics, leadership, problem-solving, spiritual, and philosophical contemplation.

Knowledge is domain specific.

Wisdom nurtures your desire for personal growth, well-being, and the betterment of others. Knowledge doesn’t care much about your personal growth and rarely about others.

Knowledge is inert. Wisdom is alive.

Attaining wisdom is the path to becoming a contemporary elder. To walk the path, elders realize they need to cultivate an open mind, a willingness to learn, and an openness to being wrong. And on this path, elders must welcome different perspectives while consistently engaging in self-reflection, mediation, and introspection.

Knowledge shuns these practices.

FINAL STATEMENT

Look at the world today. Take a look at our politics, environment, inequities, suffering, hate and pain. If knowledge were the answer, these problems would get better, not worse. What is lacking is wisdom.

What the world needs now is wisdom. It will alter many conversations that allow these failures to continue and worsen.

Becoming a contemporary elder and attaining wisdom is a journey. A journey requiring self-awareness, self-understanding, and truthful self-disclosure.

Contemporary elders can alter the nature and character of conversations and bring themselves and others to operate as their highest selves, with the greatest humanity, the scariest humility, the fullest self-expression, and the deepest appreciation for life.

THE OPEN SANGA CALL AND SPECIAL GUEST EVENT

This series of calls has and is working on Forgiveness. The call is open to those interested in looking at themselves in areas that are often masked, hidden, or suppressed – that reduce aliveness and compassion, compassion for self and others.

The Open Sanga call is on July 26 ^th , from 4:00 pm to 5:15 pm PT. If you are new to these Sangha calls, please register at https://form.jotform.com/230334570253044

The Special Guest event with Dr. Buck Blodgett, August 9 ^th , “Forgiving the Unforgiveable,” from 4:00 pm to 5:15 pm PT. If you haven’t participated in a Sangha event previously, please register at https://form.jotform.com/231344021420134

An update on the Elder Essays book

Fri, 14 Jul 2023 12:08:48 GMT

An update on The Elder Essays book

I am on the last leg of writing my book. But that last leg takes time, takes editors and publishers, takes some beta readers for testimony, and as always, those encounters with the many unforeseen elements that were never previously considered.

My writing as a contemporary elder feeds curiosity, excavates greater self-understanding, expands consciousness, sharpens awareness, and keeps me on purpose while generating revelations and insights.

Writing encourages the formation of relationships with authentic elders, men, and women of higher wisdom, which then allow me access to my higher wisdom.

One part of any book is the Author’s Page. For me, in this particular book, I wanted purpose over person. And I want it to open the book, not be the last page. The reader needs to know the “source” and “why” to get the most value from the book.

Here is the Author Page from THE ELDER ESSAYS: (Pub. 2024).

THE AUTHOR & THE PURPOSE

Dr. Marc B Cooper

CONTEMPORARY ELDER INSTITUTE

Elder Coaching and Development

Founder, Sangha Shepard, Jnana Yoga Teacher

Facilitating Older to Elder, Age to Sage, Aimless to Purpose

www.requestingwisdom.com

After 78 years on the planet, who I am now can be simply presented.

Learner. Seeker. Shepard. Speaker. Discoverer. Entrepreneur. Leader. Partner. Teacher. Author. Source. Trainer. Experiencer. Coach. Husband. Father. Existentialist. Metaphysicist. Contemporary Elder. Human Being.

One purpose of the Contemporary Elder Institute is to bring higher wisdom more present in the world. This is based on today’s world of suffering, pain, distrust, anger, hate, environmental degradation, nationalism, violence, murder, war, and homelessness. Yes, our world.

It’s getting worse, not better.

Whatever we’re doing is not working.

Higher wisdom is missing in having these conversations move in a different direction.

Higher wisdom is the domain of elders.

The job of the Contemporary Elder Institute is to develop elders who are welcomed, listened and heard, who alter the context and the people having these conversations.

Bringing higher wisdom to the table alters the conditions in which words are spoken, what is heard and understood, and impacts the people’s humanity having these conversations.

Higher wisdom, if appropriately executed, has tremendous power.

Another intimately related purpose of the Contemporary Elder Institute is to transmogrify those who want to become elders for our time, for our world, and, as importantly, for themselves. As elders, to possess and express far greater consciousness, peace, grace, wisdom, and equanimity in their lives and relationships.

Becoming an elder is a pilgrimage. A path requiring self-awareness, self-understanding, and truthful self-discovery. A path where self-reflection, contemplation, and meditation are good boots to wear. But beware on this path, self-deception can become a stone in your boot.

The path isn’t easy and oftentimes uncomfortable, but for those who hear the clarion call to elder, it is absolutely worth it. Who one becomes as a contemporary elder is someone who can alter the future, bringing one to operate as their highest self, with the greatest humanity, with the fullest self-expression, and with the deepest appreciation for life, theirs and others.

Forgiving the Unforgivable

Sat, 08 Jul 2023 00:47:21 GMT

Forgiving the Unforgivable

Once per quarter, the Sangha of the Contemporary Elder Institute (CEI) now has a premier guest that brings the Sangha to a deeper understanding of the topic we have consciously engaged with.

For this past quarter, we have been engaged with Forgiveness.

Damage done by being unable to forgive is chronic, suppressive, and damaging to your well-being and self-expression.

Forgiveness is freedom.

Forgiveness is not forgetting.

Forgiveness is healing.

Forgiveness is reconciliation.

Forgiveness is equanimity.

Forgiveness provides peace.

Please join Dr. Buck Bludgett, who has achieved the ability to forgive the unforgivable. A learning that we all could use in our lives.

That which you cannot forgive has you; you do not have it.

No registration is necessary if you are a Sangha member or previous guest on Sangha calls.

If new, please register at https://form.jotform.com/230334570253044 .

Please invite your friends and family that would gain value from exploring forgiveness at the deepest level.

THE WISDOM OF THE ELDER

Mon, 03 Jul 2023 21:55:16 GMT

THE WISDOM OF THE ELDER

by OpenAI with Parameters & Edits by Marc Cooper

In a realm where wisdom blooms,

Lies a tale of a sage, this spirit groomed.

An elder, weathered by countless years,

Carrying wisdom's torch, defeating youthful fears.

With eyes like ancient embers, softly gleaming,

He weaves a tapestry of life's redeeming.

A voice, a gentle river, soothing and serene,

Imparts the ancient lessons only now seen.

Through seasons passed, his steps have trod,

On paths untracked, where knowledge nods.

He's faced life's tempests, its trials and troubles,

Yet emerged unbroken, unraveling life’s puzzles.

Upon his brow, etched lines of time,

Each mark a lesson, each crease a rhyme.

He shares the treasures of life's endless quest,

Whispering truths that resonate and manifest.

He speaks of love that binds the soul,

Of patience an art that makes us whole.

He tells of courage in times of despair,

And resilience, with the capacity to repair.

The elder speaks of gratitude's embrace,

And empathy's power to heal and erase.

He sings of forgiveness, a gentle refrain,

Releasing burdens and his heart free pain.

In silence, he sits, an ancient oak,

Rooted deep in wisdom's cloak.

The world seeks solace, a glimpse of his grace,

Yearning for wisdom's sweet embrace.

With every word, his legacy weaves,

A tapestry of guidance that eternally cleaves.

For the wise elder knows, as his days unwind,

That the truest wealth is the wisdom we find.

So let us listen, with hearts unshuttered,

To the sage's whispers, in which truth is uttered.

For in his teachings, we uncover the prize,

The essence of living where wisdom lies.

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The Next Open Sangha Call is on July 26th
To Register as a Guest: https://form.jotform.com/230334570253044

Video Trailer of June 28 ^th Sangha call: https://youtu.be/ZVgvFgUq-Pc

An essay from the upcoming book, The Elder Essays

Mon, 26 Jun 2023 20:18:51 GMT

An essay from the upcoming book, The Elder Essays

The Purpose of Purpose

The craving for purpose is a defining characteristic of human beings. Many acclaimed psychologists assert that humans require a purpose or suffer psychological difficulties.

According to highly regarded business pundits, consistent with my 37 years of consulting experience, businesses that lack a true purpose underperform.

Purpose has power.

The same is true for those transitioning from older to elder. Purpose gives one a very different relationship to who they are and how they operate in the world.

One hurdle to crossing the crevasse from older to elder is to create a worthy purpose. Worthy means having or showing the qualities or abilities that merit acknowledgment in a specified way that others can recognize as having made a difference.

The names you remember and admire were purpose-driven, from the global - Gandhi, Mandela, and Lincoln to U.S. sports - Michael Jordon, Larry Bird, and Tom Brady. Purpose is high octane.

A purpose is a reason for which something is done or created - the reason something exists. The "why," as Simon Sinek distinguishes it. The rai·son d'ê·tre - the most important reason for someone or something's existence.

For most late lifers, they have served one purpose and one purpose only for decades, and suddenly they have none. A purpose primarily defined by the expectations of the culture and their family of origin. And, of course, their ego as an executive producer.

In my family, it was either becoming a doctor, a dentist, a lawyer, or a bum. Their purpose became an inherited, ingrained purpose and was echoed by everyone surrounding me. Their purpose became my purpose. And this purpose served me well.

But when I discovered entering late age, it stopped infusing me with those life elements that had me excited, engaged, focused, at-risk, and playing a game worth playing. Purposelessness thrust me quickly into the lane the culture cuts out for getting old.

In late age, that inherited and embedded purpose, the one you have lived three-quarters of your life by, no longer provides you with what is needed for the last part of the aging journey.

An elder knows when he or she has landed on their purpose when it:

1) Breath passion into their life.

2) Displaces the ego’s grasp.

3) Makes them take a stand for a future that contributes.

4) Demands expanding personal growth and self-actualization.

5) Enables them to contribute with impact.

6) Insists on courage to meet the challenges the purpose will provoke.

7) Seen and addressed as an elder, a sage, and a benefactor by others.

8) Able to follow Gandhi’s principle, “Be the person you wish to see in the world.”

Ultimately, finding that purpose as an elder that propels you from older to elder is a personal journey. A journey that involves self-reflection with unchained, unabashed truth-telling, which isn’t easy. All the masks come off.

An elder’s purpose is foundational, not financial. It comes from the heart, not the head. It reflects the unique gift that life is. It aims at relieving the suffering of others. It calls you to be your highest thought. Your purpose requires you to be an elder.

SELF-REFECTION

As an elder, self-reflection is the cornerstone of discovering your purpose. Elders honor and practice self-reflection. Self-reflection involves examining and contemplating thoughts, emotions, experiences, and actions, the act of introspection.

Introspection allows a deeper understanding of yourself, your values, beliefs, motivations, strengths, and weaknesses. Introspection is the process of making yourself the object of your research.

“To thine own self be true.” You can’t be true to a self you don’t know. Elders get to know who they really are.

In our work, the process of self-reflection has three legs – mindfulness, meditation, and ruthless compassion. With mindfulness and meditation, you learn to be fully present in the current moment. Observing your thoughts, feelings, and sensation without judgment allows them to be configurations that come and go involuntarily. They come in, and they go out. Waves on the ocean. Not having your thoughts run you gives you freedom.

But then comes the ruthless/compassionate part. What you can’t share or decline to recognize about yourself is insidious, proceeding gradually and subtly but with harmful effects. It’s self-deception.

Self-deception is the process of deceiving oneself or distorting reality to maintain a belief, perception, or understanding that is inconsistent with reality. It’s trying to convince yourself of something that may not be true or to avoid accepting the truth.

But elders have the chutzpah, the willingness to face and uncover their self-deception. Nothing to hide. No need to manipulate. No need to lie. No need to pretend. No hypocrisy. Elders allow themselves to be just who they are, and that is liberty.

Elders learn to embrace their humanity and let go of the chains. They finally realize they are human and all that comes with this package. Elders understand ‘This is it.’ You can’t put the Soufflé back in the oven. All illusions washed away. The past and the judgments of yourself become yesterday’s news.

Elders work on tomorrow’s headlines.

THE HERO'S JOURNEY OF CONTEMPORARY ELDERS

Fri, 09 Jun 2023 19:12:59 GMT

THE HERO'S JOURNEY OF CONTEMPORARY ELDERS

BECOMING THE MYTHOS OF ELDER

Growing old in our "forever young" culture is a steep challenge for contemporary elders. Our Western society sees aging as a problem. A problem perpetuated by a youth-obsessed market-driven economy, which insidiously plays on the fears of aging's physical, mental, and fiscal decline. Conversations that drive deep into our psychology that aging shouldn't be.

The contemporary elder mission is to break through this prejudicial and stereotypical challenge so that "elder" can be contributory, participatory, and influential in our world.

Our model and methods to meet this challenge align with Joseph Campbell's seminal work. Joseph Campbell was a renowned American mythologist, writer, and speaker who explored mythology's significance and relevance in human culture and experience. Campbell was one of my most influential teachers in the late 70s and early 80s.

He researched extensively and wrote several seminal books, "The Hero with a Thousand Faces" and The Power of Myth." In addition, he joined Bill Moyers in a remarkable PBS series that explored what enduring myths can tell us about ourselves. [Links below.]

Each PBS six episodes focused on a character or theme in all cultural and religious mythologies. Stories told and retold over millennia. Narratives burned into our DNA.

Campbell maintained these timeless archetypes influenced our choices and how we live today. An archetype is an original pattern or model of which all things of the same type are representations or copies, a prototype. The archetype of Campbell's work was the hero's journey.

The hero's journey involves a hero who embarks on an adventure, faces various challenges and tests, undergoes a personal transformation, and ultimately returns home with newfound wisdom about themselves and the world to share with others.

The hero's journey is a chronicle enshrined in nearly all ancient, tribal, and modern legends and myths. Moses to Mandela, Buddha to Bezos, and Chaplin to Cruise all feature the hero's journey.

According to Campbell, the hero's journey follows a specific sequence of events and stages that a hero undergoes during their quest.

We have found these same stages in becoming a contemporary elder.

The hero starts in their ordinary, everyday life. Unaware of the journey that awaits them. The ordinary life for a contemporary elder is often the ending of a successful professional career and the correlated "empty-nest" situation.

The hero has lived a productive and positively charged life in the last three to four decades. But now they intuitively sense that who they have been in their ordinary life will not serve them in their later life.

Once this predicament manifests in the hero's mind, the hero receives a call or invitation to embark on a quest, an invitation that disrupts their ordinary life.

The Contemporary Elder Institute offers such a dislocating invitation.

Considering this invitation has the hero experiencing an existential shiver. Deciding whether to accept the invitation comes with apprehension, self-doubt, and fear. A choice, if accepted, the hero understands he can no longer live this ordinary life.

A choice, if taken, would have them shed their prior identities, accrued professional merits, and established credentials - who they know themselves to be and go on an adventure into the unknown.

For Contemporary Elders, their adventures are bravely going into the unknown wilds of growing old. Unknown territory. Full of elements that can harm or even kill you.

As the hero begins their journey, they encounter a wise figure and mentor who provides guidance, advice, and training—a mentor who equips them for the journey ahead.

The Contemporary Elder Institute’s purpose and design is to be that mentorship.

The next step on the hero's journey is the hero's commitment to this adventure, a commitment to leave their ordinary life and enter a new realm with its unfamiliar territory. To jump off the edge of who they know themselves to be.

The contemporary elder retreat takes them to that edge.

Before the hero lands from their jump, they face a series of tests, meet allies, and encounter adversaries. These encounters empower the hero's character and uncover their higher selves.

Our contemporary elder retreats provide these experiences – physical and mental tests, connection with allies, and confronting their inner adversaries.

The hero now approaches the most dangerous and critical point on their journey, most often represented by an innermost cave or symbolic place of fear. This is the stage where the hero prepares for their ultimate ordeal.

For our contemporary elders, at the retreat and in our follow-up interactions, having them confront their impermanence, coming face-to-face with their mortality, and preparing them for the ultimate ordeal of death is their innermost cave.

After surviving the ordeal, the hero reaps the reward of insight, knowledge, and personal transformation. Now they have gained strength, wisdom, and power. Finally, they are ready to return to the ordinary world, the last stage of the hero's journey.

The hero's journey is the perfect metaphor for becoming a contemporary elder. It allows for self-discovery, courage and sacrifice, and pursuing a higher purpose.

A contemporary elder not only belongs to the current time and culture but embodies the qualities associated with a traditional elder - wisdom, broad life experience, peace, tranquility, self-understanding, and respect for others and life itself.

A contemporary elder can now offer insights, counsel, and guidance to others while continuing to adapt and understand the modern world.

https://billmoyers.com/series/joseph-campbell-and-the-power-of-myth-1988/

HEADS UP

In June, I will focus entirely on completing my book, THE ELDER ESSAYS. There will not be a weekly post as I fully concentrate on getting as much done for the book and keeping my word with my editor and my publisher. We will return to our weekly posts in July.

INVITATIONS

The next Open Sangha call is on June 28 ^th . If you like to be a guest, Click Here.

Also, the Sangha is now producing Special Events. Our next Special Event is with Buck Blodgett of the Live>death Project. The title of the event is "Forgiving the Unforgivable."

The event will be a remarkable examination of forgiveness that doesn't absolve other people of their accountability but allows release from the tentacle of revenge, hate, and payback. Stay tuned; dates are being finalized for July.

https://www.theloveisgreaterthanhateproject.com/

THE BREAKDOWN OF HUMANITY's HUMANITY WHY ELDERS ARE THE ONES TO FIX IT

Tue, 30 May 2023 11:31:50 GMT

THE BREAKDOWN OF HUMANITY's HUMANITY

WHY ELDERS ARE THE ONES TO FIX IT

Our ancient ancestors, 9,000 years ago, were able to build huge Neolithic structures engraved with architectural detail into massive stones. The engravings exhibited how early humans built huge traps, known as desert kites, to catch wild animals.

The animals snared furnished food, clothing, blankets, medicine, and shelter structural elements. Desert kites were our ancestors' disruptive technology which enabled our antecedents to survive. You are here because of this technology.

The advent of disruptive technologies has been interspersed throughout human history, each causing remarkable progress and astonishing achievements. But now, the emergence of these technologies has moved from a sprinkling to a pour.

Just in the last few years, Artificial Intelligence, Machine to Machine Learning, Blockchain, Crypto Currency, Virtual and Augmented Reality, 3D Printing, Renewable Energy, Autonomous Vehicles, Robotics, Gene Editing, Big Data and Analytics, and Nanotechnology – discharging into our everyday lives.

However, be warned the price of these achievements also accelerates the erosion of what it means to be human. We've lost a good bit already.

The loss of humanity has tremendous implications for society, communities, relationships, and individuals now and into the future. Moreover, the loss of humanity portends grave consequences for the earth's sustainability and all the creatures now upon it.

But our inherent transcendent assets will be the most significant of all losses. Transcendence refers to surpassing or going beyond ordinary limits or boundaries in the context and consciousness of human beings.

Transcendent properties refer to qualities or aspects that extend beyond the physical or material realm and touch the deeper dimensions of existence.

Without holding onto these intangible assets, we will be confined to the transactional zone without access to the transformational zone. As a result, what it means to be human will be restricted. Consciousness corralled.

HUMANITY

The definition of humanity is "compassionate and sympathetic, with generous behavior or disposition: the quality or state of being humane." Unfortunately, our humanity, which makes humans human, is now in danger of extinction.

Our early ancestors, driven by survival instincts, required solid communal bonds that relied on cooperation and mutual support. Bonds needed unwavering trust, commitment, and deep connection with others.

But these cement-like bonds were tightly held by the rebar of empathy, compassion, and high regard for others. Instead, the constantly expanding and almost infinite power of technology, pushing for cultural changes it commands, promotes isolation, selfishness, and materialism—the opposite of what's needed for humanity to be present.

Today, in our Western culture's silent yet unmistakable religion of scientific materialism, where the screen is the altar, the priests' Google, Amazon, Meta, and Apple, with OpenAI recently anointed as pope—devoutly praying at our screens being our pews. But, unfortunately, our digital religious fervor is disconnecting us further from our humanity.

That which makes us human is disappearing. The ability to experience life, love, communicate, appreciate nature, become self-actualized, and consider other spiritual realms, is going away.

HOW ELDERS WILL COUNTER

One particular feature of elders is their extraordinary capacity for empathy. Empathy is the most decisive element in reopening the gates of humanity. Hence, elders can be a gateway for humanity to occur in others because they deliver authentic empathy.

Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of another. In contrast, sympathy is feeling bad for someone because of their circumstances. Sympathy is feeling bad for the other person; empathy is feeling what the other person feels - a much deeper emotional connection.

We have repeatedly witnessed that being with an elder who provides genuine empathy ignites the humanity in others. When people are more human with each other, relationships, communication, and intentions manifest differently.

Empathy is the kindling to reignite those ancestral bonds - unwavering trust, commitment, and deep connection with others.

Elders can provide empathy because they have become highly conscious, emotionally attuned, and sensitive to their own humanity. This heightened awareness of their humanity allows elders to recognize and relate to the humanity in others and speak to it, which brings their humanity forward.

To provide unfiltered empathy, elders mastered suspending presuppositions - judgments, assessments, and convictions about themselves and others. Not that these presuppositions won't recur, but elders can release them quickly, clearing the runway for empathy.

Elders know empathy can't be faked. Empathy is also physiologic. There are neural and sensory receptors coupled in an empathetic linkage. Receptor sites live in every part of the body. Facial expressions, body language, and tone of voice all powerfully and silently communicate. Empathy is a phenomenologic and physiologic event. It's a feeling, not an intellectual concept.

Elders sing the lyrics of the song of empathy, first recorded by the Beattle's, "I Am The Walrus. "I am he as you are he as you are me. And we are all together…Come together. Come together right now."

GUEST SANGHA CALL

The next Guest Sangha call is on June 28 ^th , from 4:00 to 5:30 pm PT.

Becoming an elder is not a matter of age as much as it is a matter of wisdom, experience, and the ability to guide and inspire others.

Becoming an elder is the will to drop the former identities and history and to be a creative and responsible force in designing their late age future.

Becoming an elder transforms how you introduce yourself.

To register: https://form.jotform.com/230334570253044

DON'T WORRY, BE HAPPY

Thu, 18 May 2023 20:56:32 GMT

DON'T WORRY, BE HAPPY

Most late-aged Americans worry about the oncoming declines in their physical abilities, memory loss, running out of money, and the multitude of chronic illnesses, one or more of which will eventually beset them.

Unfortunately, worry gives way to anxiety or unease, allowing one's mind to dwell on difficulty or troubles. Worrying is well-documented to be detrimental to physical and mental well-being.

Several studies report accelerated rates of dementia and more rapid advances in chronic illness with anxiety and depression in older adults. Worrying thoughts are the gatekeepers to anxiety and depression.

But notice all these worries occur in a future that has not yet happened. Worries are not about the past. Worries do not occur in the present moment with its obligation for ‘now’ awareness. No, worries only occur in an assumed future. Fear of the detrimental consequences of aging, with all its physical and mental debilitations, keeps you in the HOV lane of worry.

Other things occupy late-age worrying besides declining health. These worrisome conversations include loss of independence, inability to age at home, death of a spouse, getting injured, and an inability to manage day-to-day living.

Contemporary elders recognize that these worries are weaponized by prevailing cultural, family, and peer conversations about aging. These are not conversations you have consciously created. They were an inheritance you couldn’t refuse.

You are not the author of these conversations; you are the subscriber. And these conversations mostly go unexamined, yet much of the content has been yellow-highlighted and learned by rote.

Insidious conversations comprised of thoughts, attitudes, and beliefs about getting older. With their attached emotions, conversations are aided and abetted by living in a stay-young-forever, more-is-better, individualist culture. Unfortunately, these worrisome conversations are poison to happiness.

As Alfred Noble said, “Worry is the stomach’s worst poison.” But then again, Tom Petty said, “Most things I worry about never happen anyway.” Poisoning yourself needlessly?

Contemporary elders fully understand that reality is not fixed but interpretative. Knowing this allows elders to examine these underlying “worry” conversations and explore why exactly they retain them.

And, of course, these conversations are assured to arise again; they live perniciously in every corner of our culture. Contemporary elders, elders for these this time and place, have the vista of self-reflection, allowing them to create other conversations that yield more happiness as they age.

OUR FINDINGS FOR WHY ELDERS ARE HAPPIER

Our direct experience is that contemporary elders are happier and have better health compared to others their age. Moreover, we observe that the source of this greater happiness and well-being is that these elders have a deeper appreciation of life, a more profound sense of fulfillment, and a far greater ability to handle life's vicissitudes.

Elders also have fewer aspirations and expectations of themselves, are unconcerned about pleasing everyone else, and are nonserious about many of life's situations.

They avoid drama, conflict, and stupidity and neither make it wrong nor actively engage when it’s around – and it’s around a lot. Their sense of humor blossoms while their egos shrivel.

They are able to dismiss these cultural worry conversations by expanding four distinct internal qualities. One, elders are altruistic. Two, they are more able to live in the moment. Three, they can be contemplative rather than reactive. And four, they cleave from the past and fuse into a more purposeful future.

Elders, when engaged with these four elements, worrying thoughts don’t stick. And when those thoughts reappear, the exit door is clearly marked and easily found.

ALTRUISM

Altruism is the belief in or practice of disinterested and selfless concern for the well-being of others. Disinterested means not influenced by considerations of personal advantage.

In our context of elder, we know that altruism gets stronger with age. Most of the time, it is left half asleep. Elders fully awaken to this aspirational calling and get into action to have their respective callings manifest. Altruistic development drives elders to serve their higher purpose.

Contemporary elders find that the purpose of life is a life of purpose.

BEING IN THE MOMENT

Contemporary elders meditate. Each chooses the best meditation methods for themselves. Each has to find their meditation groove. But whatever practice they choose, their practice lets them become a witness to their thinking mind.

Being a witness to your thoughts allows you to observe your thoughts in an objective way. The less subjective, the more objective you are about your thoughts, the less power they have over you. You have thoughts; thoughts do not have you.

Recognition of these conversations within yourself unseats the cultural, family, and psychological conversational implants on aging. Whatever meditative practice these elders have pursued allows them to place themselves in the moment, not in the past or the future. Here. Now. Worrisome thinking has no oxygen in the moment.

CONTEMPLATION RATHER THAN REACTION

Contemplation is the action of looking thoughtfully at something for a long time. A reflective examination, scrutiny, an introspection of perceptions and understandings previously left unexamined.

In our Western culture, contemplation is not highly regarded. In fact, contemplation is unappreciated and undervalued. The scramble to get more, better, and faster has no tolerance for contemplation.

Elders have found tremendous benefits in contemplation. They report benefits from contemplative practices include stress reduction, enhanced attention and awareness abilities, improved self-regulation, and heightened empathy awareness.

Contemplation allows elders to go behind their beliefs and emotions to see their underpinnings. Contemplation reveals the network of beliefs and presuppositions and the heavy cost of holding onto those beliefs. Contemplation is a mind detoxifier.

Contemplation, when practiced, puts you as the observer rather than the doer. Contemplation moves you from the stage to the good seats, ten rows up behind the orchestra, with short people in front. Now you can see the whole play. Rather than be King Lear, you can watch King Lear.

CLEAVE FROM THE PAST AND MELD INTO UNEXPECTED FUTURE

When you engage in an altruistic mission, consciously be in the moment, and allow yourself time to be contemplative, you can cleave yourself from your past and its various assumed identities. You become the unvarnished you, a truthful you, a more human you, a freer you, a wiser you.

A previously unrecognized yet somehow familiar future somehow becomes clearly available at this four-way nexus – altruism, being in the moment, contemplation, and letting go of the grip of your past.

In becoming a contemporary elder, an elder for these times, you unhitch from your past, along with its habits, thoughts, behaviors and chronic practices, You are out the door, down the path, and on your way. You now profoundly impact others wherever you go, with whomever you speak, to cause a better future.

It is our experience that contemporary elders are happier and better adjusted to aging and end-of-life. Basically, they worry far less and are happier far more.

They’ve figured it out - Don’t worry. Be happy.

The Sangha is a relationship-based space, a network of relationships all in late age, with tremendous collective wisdom, that generates new interpretations of growing old by choice rather than default.

In our collective experience, the relationships in the Sangha and the work of the Sangha as we proceed into late age allow for transmogrification. Transmogrification is the act or process of changing or being changed completely.

The next open Sangha call is on May 24 ^th from 4:00 pm PDT till approximately 5:20 pm PDT. There is no cost.

If you are first-time guest, we ask you to register either via the Website www.requestingwisdom.com/the-sangha or directly at https://form.jotform.com/230334570253044

The theme of this call is Interbeing. We, they, them, it and I – all interconnected, which gives us who you are. The better your understanding of interbeing, the better you will age and the less burden you will carry.

Precall Reference - https://www.garrisoninstitute.org/blog/insight-of-interbeing/

THE AAA CLUB OF CONTEMPORARY ELDERS ACCEPTANCE, AWARENESS & ALLOWING

Wed, 10 May 2023 19:14:28 GMT

THE AAA CLUB OF CONTEMPORARY ELDERS

ACCEPTANCE, AWARENESS & ALLOWING

HOW TO SPOT A CONTEMPORARY ELDER

Contemporary elders reach deeper into the past and further into the future than others. They have an extraordinary ability to see the whole rather than the parts. They work reliably in complexity to see the elementary.

Contemporary elders develop higher wisdom, expanded experiential capabilities, and have widely opened their gates to metaphysical, ancestral, and existential knowledge.

Contemporary elders experience others more profoundly. These elders can hear the unsaid and sense the confined emotions and underlying perceived restraints of others. This recognition allows a contemporary elder to speak and be embraced as an elder.

Contemporary elders deliver a depth of compassionate understanding which is seldom available. This listening quality allows the elder to be honorably regarded and generously heard. Moreover, this listening allows elders to speak directly to another's often-shielded humanity.

Contemporary elders directly influence relationships and decision-making at every level of conversation. Moreover, they extract damaging influences so honest and empathetic conversations occur.

Contemporary fully embrace the archetype of traditional elder, the centuries of elder traditions, knowledge, and wisdom, but now transmogrified - transformed surprisingly or magically - bringing that magic to people living in today's uncertain, threatening world.

This makes a contemporary elder easier to spot. They all are card-carrying and dues-paying members of the three AAA club.

THE AAA CLUB

When one becomes an elder, they have successfully amplified three realms of living – acceptance, awareness, and allowing. These intensified and expanded realms allow elders much greater freedom, peace, humor, enhanced mental and physical well-being, and a bottomless well of self-understanding.

Not easy to be a member of the triple-A club. In our culture, the changes inherent in aging, which are irreversible and unstoppable, occur as a pestilence, a plague. And like any plague in our Western culture, it must be eradicated.

Contemporary elders disallow the cultural conversation about aging to overtake them. They have come to realize that shots, pills, surgery, and physical activities will not stop them from aging or dying. Prolong it, perhaps, but getting older and dying will happen.

Elders fully grasp the principle of impermanence. Nothing that exists in time and form is permanent. "Nothing endures but change," said Heraclitus, the ancient Greek pre-Socratic philosopher.

Contemporary elders have stopped contributing to the spending billions of dollars on something they can't do anything about – aging and death. They stop being ‘refuseniks' to aging. They stop holding aging, dying, and death as unacceptable, intolerable, and deplorable. They accept their fate as human beings.

Acceptance requires allowing thoughts, feelings, and experiences of the end of life without judgment or resistance. At the three A’s club, they go into deeper levels of understanding, getting down to the roots of these thoughts, feelings, and experiences that repudiate and deny the end of life and aging.

So, elders become aware, and conscious of why these thoughts and experiences exist in them, and this awareness allows these thoughts and feelings to lose their grip.

Hence, contemporary elders achieve acceptance through awareness and allowing, releasing them from the claws of those thoughts, emotions, and experiences. They accept death and dying in a way that eases the fear, repudiation, and disavowing of what is always true. If you live, you will die.

When you come to accept that life is limited, impermanent, and ephemeral, you come to a much greater appreciation of life. And when a member of the AAA club, you begin to live your life from your death backward having every day and every one count.

The next open Sangha call is May 24 ^th .

See what being a member of the AAA club provides.

https://www.requestingwisdom.com/the-sangha

THE COIN OF OLD

Tue, 02 May 2023 18:46:30 GMT

THE COIN OF OLD

TAILS

I'm an old man now,

phantom unseen,

unknown even to my old self.

I'm an old man now,

listened but not heard.

Who I was no longer exists.

I'm an old man now,

seldom joined by the young.

Ignored by the alphabet generations.

I'm an old man now,

never asked for what he knows,

unquestioned beliefs say they know better.

I'm an old man now,

the white beard and the Kangol cap,

silently and too slowly walking his dog.

I'm an old man now,

unable to stop the world's self-demolition,

resigned to the cruelty of humanity.

I'm an old man now,

on the final portion of the journey,

the ending's fears dripping and percolating.

HEADS

I'm an old man now,

ungrasping, unclinging, letting be as is.

No longer requiring others' eyes to be seen.

I'm an old man now,

unbound and unrepentant.

Able to speak straight, without apprehension.

I'm an old man now,

soul channel open without static,

arrogance abandoned inviting the eternal.

I'm an old man now,

liberated from who I thought I was,

higher wisdom preceded by astonishing revelations.

I'm an old man now,

grace, bliss, compassion, patience,

now regular and peace-keeping partners.

I'm an old man now,

jealousy, envy, and lust subsided.

What were they about anyway?

I'm an old man now,

unmarried to earlier life events and conquests,

seduction by recognition obliterated by a higher calling.

I'm an old man now,

no real past, no reliable future

experiencing the unrestricted grace of the moment.

I am an old man now,

unchained from society's ambitions,

deep clawed desires and ambitions released.

I am an old man now,

able to move his thoughts aside

realizing the mind only cares about itself.

I am an old man now,

free at last, free at last, finally free at last.

Warmly welcoming my true self to myself.

I am an old man now,

completely awake to heads you win, tails you lose.

Winning far more than ever before, constantly flipping the coin.

I call heads.

Marc Cooper

www.requestingwisdom.com/the-sangha

WHO ARE YOU THAT DEATH IS?

Wed, 26 Apr 2023 19:22:18 GMT

WHO ARE YOU THAT DEATH IS?

If there's one thing all humans have in common, it's death. We all die - but what happens before and possibly after death may depend on who we were when living.

The question, "Who are you that death is?" is asked correctly. The question is precisely designed and bullseye targeted. Given that death's mystery can never be solved, an unknown that cannot be resolved, the only accessible factor in this empirical question of "Who you are that death is?" is you.

You're the very heart of this existential question. You are the one that determines your understanding, perceptions, interpretations, emotional responses, concepts, and abstractions about death.

The question puts the weight solely on you. "Who are you that death is?" You are the subject, not death. The pronoun is "I," not "it." In this semantic challenge, you are the chooser, the decider, the judge, and the jury. So why are you relating to death the way you are?

Who taught you about death? Where did you pick up these thoughts, interpretations, and understandings determining your relationship with death? What are you afraid of? What is this Fear about? Stop trying to figure death out. Death is not figure-out-able.

In Western cultures, there's a sense of mystery and dread when a person dies. Immediately the body is picked up and taken to a morgue or funeral parlor, remaining out of sight until the wake or funeral. Death is now efficiently and effectively kept unseen—death's opening act.

The entire script with death is the opening scene - the hearse pulling away, leaving hospice, and going directly to the funeral home. All transactions completed electronically. DocuSign for all the state and legal forms. Venmo to pay for the funeral. PayPal for the headstone. And let's not forget the e-mails through private portals with the attorneys who speak for the dead and the CPA that speaks for the taxman. All paid to keep death absent.

It wasn't always like this. Until the 19th or 20th Century, households in Europe and the U.S. would keep the entire death process within the home, from final deathbed visits to preparing the body for burial.

Today, obeying the culture's stay-young commandments, longing for individualism, craving materialism, and obedience to science and technology, now with access to everything known on the internet via the Chatbot world, will keep pushing death further away. Better shields from death.

Other significant players heavily contribute to this stay-away relationship from death. Indeed, one is our medical system, which sees death as a dismal failure. The system sees death as a defeat. It is a system that doesn't see the human dying, only the body that needs saving—humanity, empathy, companionship, spirituality, nowhere to be found.

The other power influencer is Wall Street which sees death as an economic bonanza. As a result, the funeral industry is booming. The M&A folks are in high gear with their investment bankers and equity partners. As a result, funeral homes and Crematoriums are getting "rolled up" quickly.

There are national funeral chains across the United States. For example, San Holdings conducts over 10,000 funerals annually, employing 315 funeral directors with 71 locations. There are publicly traded funeral companies in which to invest. You can find a list of funeral stocks to buy on www.swingtradebot.com

But the actual consumers are the families of the dying and dead. Families of the dead are willing to pay $10,000 or more, which includes viewing and burial but not the dwindling and very expensive cemetery space or the big-ticket items like caskets or headstones. Cremation isn't cheap, either. Expense be damned. Don't let death in here.

Hospice and assisted living are also failsafe investments. Keeping death and dying hidden from view rather than a normal part of life is a stellar growth industry with solid year-over-year earnings. Business conditions are outstanding as the population continues to grow, as people continue to die, and as long as families want to keep death out of the house.

With 9,494 deaths per day in the U.S. and 1.72 million Medicare beneficiaries that opted for hospice last year, the death trade is a good, reliable, and sustainable business. Everybody dies, and no one wants to be around death. So warehousing death and vanishing those dying is a solid investment.

Best of all, fear far outweighs inconvenience as the primary driving force that wants to keep death as far away as possible. But what are you afraid of? What is this Fear about?

THE DIFFERENT FEARS OF DEATH

In our work, we've found several reasons people fear death. They vary depending on the person's age, health, belief systems, self-esteem, and life satisfaction. However, in our experience, the most common factors that influence Fear of death are:

· Fear of the unknown: Not knowing what happens after you die or if there is anything beyond death.

· Fear of non-existence. Finding it hard to imagine not existing or losing your sense of self and identity.

· Fear of eternal punishment: Belief of judgment or punishment for your actions or beliefs in the afterlife.

· Fear of being reincarnated into a disadvantageous and physically challenging life.

· Fear of failing God while on earth.

· Fear of losing control: The feeling that death is inevitable and you have no power over it, hopeless.

· Fear of what will happen to the people you love.

These fears exist in some form in all of us. But we have found that shifting our relationship to death and holding death as going home rather than going to hell or going out of existence has tremendous benefits for living.

Having an intimate relationship with death has some substantial benefits.

Death is non-negotiable. Life is short. Death is a reminder of how short life is and the preciousness of life. Death reminds you of the gift of life.

Having an intimate relationship with death shifts context and priorities. Other things besides what's driving daily life become essential.

Compassion, appreciation, humility, loss of pretentiousness, ceasing being right, and making others wrong becomes who you are.

If "Who you are that death is?" is someone who repels death, is repulsed by death, and wants to keep death "out of sight and out of mind," it might be thwarting you from living life to its fullest.

On the other hand, living from your death backward allows death to be your teacher rather than a villain giving your life much greater incandescence.The body content of your post goes here. To edit this text, click on it and delete this default text and start typing your own or paste your own from a different source.

The next open Sangha call is on May 19 ^th at 4:00 pm . https://www.requestingwisdom.com/the-sangha

COMPLETION OF THE APRIL 19TH OPEN SANGHA CALL

Fri, 21 Apr 2023 19:24:17 GMT

Completion of The April 19 ^th Open Sangha Call

Most of you will get old – if you’re lucky.

All of you will die. No luck is involved here.

How you age and how you die can be a choice, not a default future.

Thank you to those that joined the Sangha call. We appreciate your time and your interest. The Sangha wants these calls to make a difference in your life as lived.

The purpose of our Sangha is to create a space, a structure, and a community of relationships that generate conscious, self-determined, self-realized late aging.

The inquiry of this April Sangha call was, “If you are the author of your life story, why did you write it this way, and how will you write it in the future?”

Here is the replay of the call https://youtu.be/4xR5ckIofBY

The next Sangha open to guests is May 24th, beginning at 4:00 pm PDT. If you are a new guest, please register https://form.jotform.com/230334570253044

Sangha members and past visitors will be automatically be included in the Zoom invite.

Registration for the Contemporary Elder retreat, September 17-24, 2023, will remain open until noon PDT on April 28 ^th . If the needed number of registrations is not reached, the retreat will be canceled and moved to a date in the Spring. Reviewers are welcome. https://www.requestingwisdom.com/retreat

NOTE - A critical element of being a contemporary elder is the reorientation and relationship with our death. Frank Ostaseski, pioneering hospice founder and end-of-life educator, was a spark in our initial development of the Contemporary Elder Institute. This video with Frank allows us to reexamine our relationship with death and begin to accept it and transform our relationship with it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IX8rOXdVVI4

Revelation Must Be Terrible

Wed, 19 Apr 2023 21:33:45 GMT

Revelation Must Be Terrible

By David Whyte

Revelation must be
terrible with no time left
to say goodbye.

Imagine that moment
staring at the still waters
with only the brief tremor

of your body to say
you are leaving everything
and everyone you know behind.

Being far from home is hard, but you know,
at least we are exiled together.
When you open your eyes to the world

you are on your own for
the first time. No one is
even interested in saving you now

and the world steps in
to test the calm fluidity of your body
from moment to moment

as if it believed you could join
its vibrant dance
of fire and calmness and final stillness.

As if you were meant to be exactly
where you are, as if
like the dark branch of a desert river

you could flow on without a speck
of guilt and everything
everywhere would still be just as it should be.

As if your place in the world mattered
and the world could
neither speak nor hear the fullness of

its own bitter and beautiful cry
without the deep well
of your body resonating in the echo.

Knowing that it takes only
that one terrible
word to make the circle complete,

revelation must be terrible
knowing you can
never hide your voice again.

THE REVELATION ERUPTS

Some years ago, I sat on a thick wool blanket with a dozen Native American elders on the dirt floor of a kiva in Northwest New Mexico. A kiva is a large circular underground structure used for spiritual ceremonies .

I had climbed down to the dirt floor twenty feet below on a sturdy ladder made of oak and maple branches. I sat where I was told in the circle at the back wall of the kiva. I felt the holiness of the space. An intensity of awareness of the many years of this kiva's existence, the thousands of ceremonies conducted, and the attendance of ancient ancestors.

A small fire in the middle burned, smoke disappearing in the round opening at the roof. Richard, the Wisdom Elder of the council, was quiet until a deep silence occurred around the circle. There was a voltage in the silence. Richard then began to speak.

I could sense how the men in the circle heard him as he spoke. Not just listened but heard at a visceral level. It occurred to me as well. Honor, high regard, admiration, and appreciation, love percolated. There was more than Richard's words or tone. There was a presence, a way of being, which caused a state of reverence.

And at the time, I didn't have words for what I was experiencing, but it was palpable. As energy, I was vibrating at a different frequency. And at that moment, it was apparent that the phenomenon of elder that existed here wasn't anywhere to be found in our culture, communities, or families.

I received the ceremonial invitation to the kiva because I assisted three elders from the tribe in coming to Seattle and touring assisted living facilities. People were getting old and dying off the reservation, away from the tribe, the community, and their families. The elder council finally took this issue to mission status along with all the difficulties of dealing with government agencies, land use managers, treaties, intratribal bullsh*t, and financing. It was not a simple matter.

I managed the three elders' logistics, food, and transportation, acted as their interpreter, and guided them for the day in Seattle. Two of the three had never been on a plane before. All three had never really spent time in our cement ecosystem.

At that time, I lived and worked in Seattle as a consultant with senior executives and boards at three major hospitals, Evergreen, Valley, and Swedish, so I had the connections to make this tour happen. Consequently, I got to be the "roadie" for this trio.

Over the next year after their visit, things were accomplished to generate something akin to assisted living and hospice services adjacent to the reservation staffed by volunteers and family.

That is why my kiva invitation happened. It was a ceremony to honor my contribution.

Now sitting on my blanket, being with and listening to Richard, watching and feeling what was occurring in the space. To experience an elder's presence and speaking, which generated a sense of grace, egolessness, mutual honor, and respect, was profound.

What if elders were present in our culture, in our communities, in our businesses, in our politics, and in our families? What would be possible?

The revelation, like a volcanic event, erupted. My entire world and worldview suddenly transformed. The revelation converted my future, my purpose in life, and how I would reshape myself to become an elder and to bring eldership appropriate to this time and place in our world. Kaboom!